The create-a-word game

Verbotomist's Delight

This is a Darwinian greenhouse. To see the top verboticisms for each definition, visit the archives on the Verbotomy Blog.

Hello? Hello? Is this customer service?

DEFINITION: v. To greet a person on the phone in rude or obnoxious manner, and then do your best to ignore, or talk over, whatever they say as the conversation continues. n. A person with atrocious phone manners.

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Omigod! What happened to you?

DEFINITION: v. To injure yourself while performing a normal everyday activity, such bending down, standing up, or turning your head quickly. n. An self-inflicted injury which occurred during a period of physical inactivity.

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Please listen carefully as our menu has recently changed...

DEFINITION: v. To call a phone "help line" and spend 45 minutes pushing buttons and screaming at dumb voice-recognition system, before being automatically disconnected. n. A push-button or voice-activated phone menu system designed to irritate those who use it.

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I'll just wait here until you're free.

DEFINITION: v. To hover near, or directly on top of, a person who is busy doing something else, in order to force them to immediately surrender their full attention. n. A person who invades other people's private spaces and uses the social discomfort to demand attention.

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Thanks! But can't you see you're interrupting...

DEFINITION: n. An extremely moody boss, happy one day, mad the next, happy, mad, happy, mad... v. To happily give orders one minute, then angrily yell out the opposite instructions the next. (Note: It's not because you're moody. It's because people don't listen!)

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Are you sure that you don't have athlete's foot?

DEFINITION: v. To have a medical condition or illness and yet continually deny it, even after your doctor has diagnosed it. n. A person who steadfastly refuses to accept a medical diagnosis or to follow the prescribed treatment.

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I can't breathe with this tie on!

DEFINITION: n. A fashion accessory or style of dress which purports to improve one's appearance and attitude, but actually does the opposite. v. To follow a fashion dictum in an effort to improve your social standing even when it causes physical discomfort.

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What are you doing in the fast lane?!!

DEFINITION: n. A driver who ignores the rules of the road by driving very slowly (i.e. at the legal limit) in the fast lane. v. To strictly observe the "suggested" speed limits, even when using the fast lane.

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More Verbotomy: << Back to newer | More from the past >>

To see the favorite Verboticisms of the day from the past, visit the archives on the Verbotomy Blog.