Verboticisms

Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: fan/tuh/files

Sentence: John had six different coloured sets of phantofiles he alternated at various times of the day to keep 'The Man' off his case and to demonstrate his industriousness and multitasking abilities. "Damn, he's good!" thought his boss. "He's completed three different projects today and it's only noon." John's phantofiles put him in line for a raise.

Etymology: phantom + files

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COMMENTS:

hmm - good ploy - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-13: 10:53:00

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Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: dosss err eee ay

Sentence: he carried his dosserier with him everywhere, adding different coloured stickies each month or so to keep it looking fresh. He called it his licence to kill....time.

Etymology: dossier, dosser

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COMMENTS:

Hopefully the use of his dosserier won't come back to kick him in the dosserriere. - Clayton, 2007-06-13: 07:48:00

Maybe he carried it in a fanny pack - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-13: 09:26:00

How cheeky! - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-13: 10:36:00

i hate to butt in, but is there no rear end to these pun threads?! - jadenguy, 2007-06-13: 11:41:00

ooh that reminds me - it's lunchtime and now I'm in the moods for buns - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-13: 12:10:00

oops I meant mood - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-13: 12:11:00

I'm thinking it would be out-of-line to make a comment about sticky buns, but the air conditioner isn't working in my office today. - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-13: 12:36:00

Such a tool would be perfect for hiding the fact that you're just bumming around instead of working your @$$ off. - ErWenn, 2007-06-13: 14:05:00

Some might say you should just turn the other cheek, jadenguy, but I'm behind you 100% if you want to get to the bottom of this problem. - ErWenn, 2007-06-13: 14:10:00

Rear end to the pun threads? Tush, tush. I've got a haunch we'll be back end the saddle tomorrow. Now, let me hit the can and we can all go grab a Heinie. Fanny that I should put it that way... I've been glute to my seat the hole day. Sorry, that last one was for posteriority. - Clayton, 2007-06-13: 14:34:00

OMG Clayton and ErWenn! Too fanny! - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-13: 14:45:00

I think we should put an ASSterisk beside this definition - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-13: 14:47:00

i'm sorry if I came off a little anal before, as i didn't mean to be so stern. but i just find puns comical garbage that we'll always keep with us, but like junk in the trunk of your car that you forget about for as long as possible, bodonkadonk on wood. - jadenguy, 2007-06-13: 16:59:00

LMAO!! - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-13: 17:46:00

No butts about it, my friend laughed so hard it rectum! - petaj, 2007-06-14: 04:29:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: fyl loo zhun

Sentence: He was the Great Pretender in our office. Sadly, because he was a male, he got away with it for way longer than any female would even dare try. Yes, Seymour Dolittle, was a fileusion. He would stalk the halls carrying a file folder and pretend to "do his rounds" with nothing more than what turned out to be a pizza place menu and and a bus schedule in his file folder. He fooled the senior management for over 5 years (the ladies in the company twigged on after a year or two, but had nowhere to lodge their concerns). When the cuts came, no one could salvage Seymour, as he worked for no one, did not report to anyone and could never successfully explain his presence in the hallowed halls. Luckily for him, he worked long enough to collect a great pension, unemployment insurance and a tasty severance for all his hard-worked time. Nice work if you can get it...and he wasn't even a CEO of anything!

Etymology: File (a set of related records (either written or electronic) kept together) & Illusion (an erroneous mental representation; the act of deluding; deception by creating illusory ideas; an illusory feat; considered magical by naive observers)

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Created by: texmom

Pronunciation: Eer pen sill

Sentence: He wandered around with an earpencil as if he were doing math.

Etymology: ear - yeah the body part pencil - simple graphic tool

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Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: CAM - oh - frod

Sentence: Maurice is a complete phony, inept in his job and short of actual job knowledge so in order to deceive his employers and fellow employees he regularly committed camoufraud, carrying file folders and other work related objects in an effort to create the illusion that he was fully engaged in work efforts.

Etymology: Blend of camouflage and fraud.

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COMMENTS:

There was abuffoon called Maurice__Who carried around a valise__He shunned so much labor__not even his neighbor__could say if he's live or deceased. - metrohumanx, 2008-08-06: 16:47:00

The best! - lumina, 2008-08-06: 23:51:00

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Created by: mrskellyscl

Pronunciation: sup-plies-guys

Sentence: Herb was office supply guy and had charge of the stock room; however, we knew him as the "suppliesguise" because he'd spend the entire day running back and forth with paper, folders and what not just to make himself look busier than he really was. That wasn't so bad, but when anyone asked him to get supplies for them his response was, "I'm sorry, I'm too busy. You'll have to get it yourself!"

Etymology: supplies: provisions; furnish or equip + guise: an artful or simulated pretense

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Created by: jadenguy

Pronunciation: as OOM tot

Sentence: Like a vampire hunter to the cross, he lept across his cubicle and grabbed a stack of printed material on company letterhead as his boss approached; his assumetote being just enough of a ruse to confuse his superior for perhaps another week. His smokescreen-jobsaver spreadsheet was already drawing suspicion as to exactly how much time he spent playing internet word games!

Etymology: assume + tote + asymptote assume (people assume you are working ) + tote (to carry) + asymptote (to infinitely approach something (work))

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COMMENTS:

yeah, like people play internet word games at work! implausible. - jadenguy, 2007-06-13: 11:40:00

Can I have a copy of that spreadsheet? - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-13: 13:52:00

you come up with very creative sentences jadenguy - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-13: 14:51:00

i try. i try. - jadenguy, 2007-06-13: 17:12:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: dok u men tal it ee

Sentence: Pierre's ruse was to use his documentality to elude real work. He would carry any official-looking folder or paper to make it look like he was on his way to a very important meeting. In fact, he remembered the trick his English classes used about the different words "stationary & stationery". The "ar" one stood for At Rest, as in stationary machinery and the other "er" one stood for the last 2 letters in paper...or in his case "Eternally Roving".

Etymology: Document (writing that provides information (especially information of an official nature); anything serving as a representation of a person's thinking by means of symbolic marks) & Mentality (a habitual or characteristic mental attitude that determines how you will interpret and respond to situations; mental ability)

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Created by: Mrgoodtimes

Pronunciation: prahp- cue - pie

Sentence: Looking over his desk, John wondered which of his propcupies to bring with him on his daily walk to the vending machine. He knew he had to walk with pace and urgency to develop the right volume of sweat on his brow, but also the right iPad, laptop, red binder, 90's beeper, bluetooth, box labeled "Fragile" combo was key to success.

Etymology: Prop - occupy

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Created by: Discoveria

Pronunciation: ess-KAY-pur-wurk

Sentence: Just before weekly staff meetings, Joe's pile of escaperwork would grow to include three reports, two manila envelopes, a stapler and a large black binder labelled 'URGENT'.

Etymology: escape (to avoid) + paperwork (documents)

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