Verboticisms

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: fyl loo zhun

Sentence: He was the Great Pretender in our office. Sadly, because he was a male, he got away with it for way longer than any female would even dare try. Yes, Seymour Dolittle, was a fileusion. He would stalk the halls carrying a file folder and pretend to "do his rounds" with nothing more than what turned out to be a pizza place menu and and a bus schedule in his file folder. He fooled the senior management for over 5 years (the ladies in the company twigged on after a year or two, but had nowhere to lodge their concerns). When the cuts came, no one could salvage Seymour, as he worked for no one, did not report to anyone and could never successfully explain his presence in the hallowed halls. Luckily for him, he worked long enough to collect a great pension, unemployment insurance and a tasty severance for all his hard-worked time. Nice work if you can get it...and he wasn't even a CEO of anything!

Etymology: File (a set of related records (either written or electronic) kept together) & Illusion (an erroneous mental representation; the act of deluding; deception by creating illusory ideas; an illusory feat; considered magical by naive observers)

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Created by: keeno82uk

Pronunciation: dis-work-illusion-ment

Sentence: "that guy is so practicing disworkillusionment, as he always carries around that file"

Etymology: Meaning the illusion of work by cloaking your lack of said work using props, i.e folder, laptop

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Created by: purpleartichokes

Pronunciation: slak-sess-or-ee

Sentence: Phil's slackcessory wasn't fooling anyone. The "tech manual" he was toting around was the instruction booklet for his lawn mower. Apparently, he was Fridazed when he took that course on shirkonomics.

Etymology: slack (to avoid work), accessory

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COMMENTS:

I thought a slackcessory was a new belt. - galwaywegian, 2007-06-13: 07:01:00

great one purple! - toadstool57, 2007-06-13: 07:07:00

Bravo! - Clayton, 2007-06-13: 07:42:00

very good!! - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-13: 09:27:00

Galway - a belt would be a britch-hiker. And I'm quite pleased that I finally made a word that I actually like! - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-13: 10:33:00

actually purple I think a britch-hiker is a brilliant word for suspenders - how about a belt being a gutwrencher - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-13: 10:57:00

That's good! Wish one came with the squishsuit I bought this year. - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-13: 11:21:00

"Slackcessory" is indeed a good word, though it sounds like it would apply equally to a device for enhancing the slacking experience (such as a Gameboy) as it would to a device for hiding the slacking experience. - ErWenn, 2007-06-13: 14:13:00

And "britch-hiker" is simply awesome. I think it's a generic term for anything that pulls your pants up, such as a belt, a pair of suspenders, or a wedgie-giver. - ErWenn, 2007-06-13: 14:14:00

the best - pguse, 2007-06-13: 14:55:00

Yep. Wished I thought of that. - texmom, 2007-06-13: 20:41:00

ErWenn makes a good point, but I think that words such as these might offer more utility than their highly specified synonyms. This one might have eight different sense of meaning. Perhaps more in America. - Clayton, 2007-06-13: 20:41:00

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Created by: ryanpetie

Pronunciation: foh-sim-ill-lay

Sentence: Darren gathered his fauxsimiles and strode around the office like a man possessed. 'A few more laps,' he thought, 'and I could be managing partner.'

Etymology: faux/facsimile

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Created by: bigdog

Pronunciation: slawth-o-flazhe

Sentence: The piles of paper on my desk are all just slothouflage to stop the boss from seeing my pillow and scotch bottle.

Etymology: sloth (indolence) + camouflage (disguise)

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Created by: jadenguy

Pronunciation: as OOM tot

Sentence: Like a vampire hunter to the cross, he lept across his cubicle and grabbed a stack of printed material on company letterhead as his boss approached; his assumetote being just enough of a ruse to confuse his superior for perhaps another week. His smokescreen-jobsaver spreadsheet was already drawing suspicion as to exactly how much time he spent playing internet word games!

Etymology: assume + tote + asymptote assume (people assume you are working ) + tote (to carry) + asymptote (to infinitely approach something (work))

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COMMENTS:

yeah, like people play internet word games at work! implausible. - jadenguy, 2007-06-13: 11:40:00

Can I have a copy of that spreadsheet? - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-13: 13:52:00

you come up with very creative sentences jadenguy - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-13: 14:51:00

i try. i try. - jadenguy, 2007-06-13: 17:12:00

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Created by: mrskellyscl

Pronunciation: sup-plies-guys

Sentence: Herb was office supply guy and had charge of the stock room; however, we knew him as the "suppliesguise" because he'd spend the entire day running back and forth with paper, folders and what not just to make himself look busier than he really was. That wasn't so bad, but when anyone asked him to get supplies for them his response was, "I'm sorry, I'm too busy. You'll have to get it yourself!"

Etymology: supplies: provisions; furnish or equip + guise: an artful or simulated pretense

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Created by: TJayzz

Pronunciation: Fy-el-o-foe

Sentence: Tarquin never went anywhere without his fileofaux, he wanted everyone to think he was extremely busy doing a very important job, when really he was just loafing around doing as little as possible.

Etymology: File(a folder for keeping loose papers in order) + Faux(artificial,imitation) ORIGIN French false = Fileofaux. See also filofax(a loose-leaf notebook for recording notes) ORIGIN representing a colloquial pronunciation of file of facts

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COMMENTS:

Fawny collision of meanings there TJ. Good word! - scrabbelicious, 2008-08-06: 06:48:00

File a foe under fiendish! - metrohumanx, 2008-08-06: 16:25:00

Great minds think alike...I had toyed with that word as well...isn't that fauxbulous! - Nosila, 2008-08-06: 21:52:00

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Created by: metrohumanx

Pronunciation: SIM-uhl-AY-bore-ig

Sentence: The Bearded One entered with a brushed-aluminum clipboard under his arm, knowing it would cause a stir amongst the real workers. Every week he carried a new SIMULABORIG which gave the impression of semi-competence and enthusiasm which fooled no one. Last time it was a P.D.A. which made his productivity plummet faster than his dignity. His vain attempts to impress the boss ranged from a simple legal pad to a glowing little spaceship planted in his ear. Last year he attemped to SIMULABORIG a staff meeting but the only wireless hotspot was behind his sweaty forehead. The office joke was that he had a whole toybox full of SIMULABORIGS to shamelessly display at every opportunity. His manifolderol seemed to have no end. He would always carry some ubiquitool, unencumbered by any knowledge of its function. Particularly fond of pseudotechnocrap, he subscribed to every high-end gizmoid catalog available. Despite the appearance of The Bearded One's weekly McGuffen, his job performance brought new meaning to the word "adequate".

Etymology: SIMUlate+lABOr+RIG=SIMULABORIG_____ simulate: to give or assume the appearance or effect of... often with the intent to deceive--Latin "simulatus", past participle of "simulare"... to copy, represent, feign, from similis "like"_____ labor: expenditure of physical or mental effort especially when difficult or compulsory-Middle English, from Anglo-French labur, from Latin labor; perhaps akin to Latin labare to totter, labi to slip_____rig: to make or construct hastily or in a makeshift manner-Me riggen,prob of Scand.orig____variations: simulaborite, simulaborana, simulaborat, simulaborology etc.

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COMMENTS:

http://isitchristmas.com/ - metrohumanx, 2008-08-06: 08:41:00

My name is MetrohumanX and I improve this message. - metrohumanx, 2008-08-06: 16:26:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: fig men day shun

Sentence: As a long time civil servant in the federal Department of the Obscure and Forgotten Files, Roger was the King of the Toadies. He spent his entire workday carrying around a file folder which was labelled S.M.A.R.T. It looked very official and proved to the innocent bystander or visitor that Roger was a man with a special mission and purpose in his work. In fact the S.M.A.R.T. File was a figmendation. It usually contained a crossword puzzle or scratch & win cards, which Roger would spend his days at work playing. His co-workers thought that the S.M.A.R.T. stood for Segregated Modules Actualizing Relative Theory. In fact, the S.M.A.R.T. acronym actually stood for See Me Avoiding Real Toil. Yes, Roger was also known by his more popular nickname: The SmartFile Dodger!

Etymology: figment (a contrived or fantastic idea, i.e: a figment of the imagination) & mendacious (intentionally untrue;lying)

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COMMENTS:

Did Riger work at the Texas Blog Suppository? Ya crack me up, Nose! - metrohumanx, 2008-08-06: 16:37:00

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