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Verbotomist's Delight

This is a Darwinian greenhouse. To see the top verboticisms for each definition, visit the archives on the Verbotomy Blog.

Please do not talk to me while we are in the office.

DEFINITION: v., To ignore a "friend" at work because you don't want anyone else to know that you are friends. n., A co-worker and secret "best friend" with whom it is best to keep your friendship confidential.

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This bank machine is so stupid.

DEFINITION: v., To have the strength of character, persistence of heart, and dimness of wit to follow an unchanging course of action even when it is completely ineffective. n., A person who unhappily does the same thing over and over again.

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Oh no! I hate it when my husband tries to dress me!

DEFINITION: v., To carefully place a lid on a bottle, especially a salad dressing bottle, so that it appears closed and will not spill unless the bottle is moved or shaken. n., A bottle which has been prepared in such a manner.

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I can't believe you left me here all day. Alone!

DEFINITION: n., A sulky look characterized by prolonged eye contact, which pets give their owners and/or spouses when they feel neglected. v., To stare at someone with a sad-eyed look in an effort to make them feel guilty.

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I think he's pretending that no one is home.

DEFINITION: v., To avoid unwanted interruptions (visits, calls, or emails) by pretending to be unavailable, unreachable or unconscious. n., A person who pretends they are not home in order to avoid talking to someone.

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This job sucks, but I love it...

DEFINITION: n., A person who diligently and persistently complains about their work. v., To enjoy bellyaching about your job so much that you would never consider quitting.

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That skirt is way too short!

DEFINITION: n., A fashion item so old that it has gone out of and come back into style. v., To save outdated clothing hoping that it will come back into style.

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>> More Verbotomy from the past...

To see the favorite Verboticisms of the day from the past, visit the archives on the Verbotomy Blog.