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Verbotomist's Delight

This is a Darwinian greenhouse. To see the top verboticisms for each definition, visit the archives on the Verbotomy Blog.

They don't make video games the way they used to...

DEFINITION: n., A belief that the contraptions of yesteryear are superior, in almost every way, to modern, present-day technology. v., To wish that the today's technology was just as good as it was in the past.

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How many trees did you kill to print that?

DEFINITION: v., To compulsively print out paper copies of all electronic files. n., A printing fetish common among paper pushers who suffer from a paranoid fear that their digital files are disintegrating on their hard drives.

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What's with this stupid pen?

DEFINITION: v., To search for and find a pen to write down an important note, only to discover that the pen does not work. n., A moment in time when the only pens you can find, are pens that do not work.

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Look at these lovely lunches. I'm tempted to steal one...

DEFINITION: v., To swap your lousy lunch for a way tastier one found in the shared office fridge. n., A lunch which is borrowed from a coworker and will not be returned until after it has been consumed.

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Yes Boss, I am sick as a dog

DEFINITION: v., To create the impression that you are deathly ill and represent a potentially lethal bio-hazard risk, so that your boss will ask you to "take the next couple of days off". n., A faked illness.

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Aaaaaaahh! It's alive!

DEFINITION: n. The unexpected moment of horror when you realize that you're sharing your bathroom shower with thousands of rapidly replicating fungi, commonly known as orange slime. v. To be colonized by orange slime.

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I can open this thing!

DEFINITION: v., To strain with all your might in a desperate effort to open a sealed container, such as a jar of pickles. n., A small jar which cannot be opened.

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>> More Verbotomy from the past...

To see the favorite Verboticisms of the day from the past, visit the archives on the Verbotomy Blog.