The create-a-word game

Verbotomist's Delight

This is a Darwinian greenhouse. To see the top verboticisms for each definition, visit the archives on the Verbotomy Blog.

Apparently, Santa has been into the festive spirits all day long.

DEFINITION: v., To prepare for holiday events where you must chat with irritating co-workers or nagging relatives, by consuming just enough alcohol to make you feel "relaxed". n., A person who arrives at a party pre-inebriated.

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Why are you vacuuming the Christmas tree?

DEFINITION: n., 1. A pine needle infestation, common during and after the holiday season. 2. Prickly Christmas guests who will not leave and cannot be cleaned up. v., To fall down during a holiday party and hide under a rug.

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Must buy presents.

DEFINITION: n., The wondrous, and the "wonder how I'm going to pay for it" feelings of the holiday shopping season. v., To stumble through a shopping mall like a zombie on a buying binge, grabbing anything and everything that will fit on your credit card.

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Why are you putting that by the front door?

DEFINITION: n., An ugly decorative item or article of clothing received from friends or relatives, which is kept stored away but ready to be pulled out at a moment's notice in anticipation of a return visit. v., To temporarily place an old, and perhaps unattractive gift in a place of honor.

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Why can't you get it up?

DEFINITION: n., A Christmas tree, ornament or caroler that, no matter how it is tied, tethered and tilted, refuses to stay upright. v., To be so full of Christmas cheer that you simply sparkle, twinkle and tip over.

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Just a second, I have call waiting...

DEFINITION: n. A person who engages themselves in several different communication channels at the same time, without paying attention to any of them v. To constantly switch your focus between cellphone calls, text messages, emails, and anything else that beeps.

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I wish this dress didn't make me look so fat...

DEFINITION: v. To seek compliments and/or support by insulting oneself or by complaining about the difficulty of one's life. n. A person who uses self-deprecation as flattery bait.

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I think Uncle Mikey taught our parrot a new word!

DEFINITION: v. To leave your pet, child or lover in the care of a friend or relative who teaches them a stupid trick or bad habit. n. A stupid trick or bad habit learned from a caregiver.

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More Verbotomy: << Back to newer | More from the past >>

To see the favorite Verboticisms of the day from the past, visit the archives on the Verbotomy Blog.