Verboticisms

Created by: GlobalGallery

Pronunciation: chair-ub

Sentence: Cupid's arrow had struck her, right through the heart. From now on there was only one serial killer for her and it was Ivan. His scarred shaven head and crazy eyes made her weak at the knees. She was his chairub and she fought hard to save him from the chair, despite the 11 witnesses who saw his axe wielding escapade. Her scented love letters were the last thing he would read, before his eyeballs boiled and exploded from the 2000 volt current that would pass through his oddly shaped head.

Etymology: 1.cherub - an angelic baby eg Cupid the Roman God of erotic love. 2. chair (electric) - a device used for capital punishment for the most heinous crimes.

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COMMENTS:

Clever! Also plays on RUB, meaning difficulty or dilemma.. - readerwriter, 2009-02-11: 10:30:00

Electtrifying! Shocking! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-11: 11:41:00

What a sentence! Too bad it couldn't have been commuted...where is that Governor when you need him? - Nosila, 2009-02-14: 23:19:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: para moo er

Sentence: Elsie was just in the mooed to find a new paramooer. So she went with her bff, Bessie to a meat market...you know the kind of place we mean. Where the goods were well hung, the cowcktails affordabull and there was poll dancing. Their only prospects were a couple of shorthorns who were both Taurus and could be herd from far away. As usual the girls struck out, because the rodeo was in town and the beefcake drank elsewhere.

Etymology: Paramour (a woman's lover;a woman who cohabits with an important man) & Mooer (a cow, who moos)

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COMMENTS:

brilliant! - galwaywegian, 2010-08-25: 04:28:00

I am glad it mooved you! - Nosila, 2010-08-26: 23:48:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: luv loynd

Sentence: Nothing was sadder than Elsie and Bessie,the Bovine Sisters, a pair of loveloined heifers. Their success at attracting true love was terribull...there had been no chance of oxtasy for them. They were always steered in the wrong direction and although they played the field, literally, they were never stampeded by suitors. They decided to join an on-loin dating service on their cowmputers. They only had one beef with this service, it was udderly impossibull to find a young stud who told the truth and did not shoot the bull. These mavericks were always born a "Taurus", owned their own spread and would love to be a fodder. Their names turned out not to be Angus or Delmonico, but Chuck or Stew. Any success the sisters had with this service was strictly oxcidental. When she herd what they had done, their mother had warned them that Internet dating always ended in steers.

Etymology: lovelorn (unhappy in love; suffering from unrequited love) & loin (a cut of meat taken from the side and back of an animal between the ribs and the rump)

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COMMENTS:

Udderly Puntastic! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-11: 02:26:00

Gives a whole new meaning to beefcake! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-11: 11:37:00

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Created by: petaj

Pronunciation: Waylon Jennings

Sentence: After checking out the refuse collection station, the palliative care hostel and the bipolar support group for potential partners, Stephen finally joined Wailinjennings Anonymous, where ironically he met a sweet girl. They fell in love and were promptly kicked out because their change of demeanour was anathema to the other miserable members.

Etymology: Waylon Jennings - country singer who was "lookin for love in all the wrong places" + wailing (crying or singing plaintively)

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COMMENTS:

Great song and verbotomy! You have a humringer here! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-11: 12:19:00

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Created by: Negatrev

Pronunciation: Proff-lee-date

Sentence: Dave will never find love while he continues to be proflidate. Sharon realized that proflidating was getting her nowhere.

Etymology: From dating (To go on a date or dates with) and profligate (adj. unrestrained by convention or morality; "Congreve draws a debauched aristocratic society"; "deplorably dissipated and degraded"; "riotous living"; "fast women") AND (noun. someone who dissipates resources self-indulgently or a wasteful person)

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Created by: kateinkorea

Pronunciation: HAL HOLE TROLE

Sentence: Ever since she and Hal broke up she's got that void to fill...so where else can you go to fill it other than the same kind of hellhole...Hal's favourite watering hole. When she gets that look in her eyes, you can tell she's doing the Halholetroll.

Etymology: HAL: a man's name HELLHOLE: terrible place WATERING HOLE: slang for drinking place TROLL: slang for looking for a member of the opposite sex by putting out bait and waiting for someone to show interest

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COMMENTS:

Gives a whole new meaning to holesome! etymology fits 'wrong places' to a T! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-11: 11:31:00

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Created by: idavecook

Pronunciation: WUh-KIN-PA-NUH-B

Sentence: "Wookin' pa nub in all da wong pwaces, wookinpanub..."

Etymology: Eddy, the brother of that guy on Chapelle's Show.

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COMMENTS:

Sounds also like Buckwheat (Eddie Murphy) singing "Baby Nub" on the old Saturday Night Live Shows... - Nosila, 2009-02-14: 23:22:00

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Created by: hyperborean

Pronunciation: rome-ee-oh

Sentence: He was getting lots of action, but couldn't find a nice girl to settle down with him. Could it be he was a roameo? He still hoped to hear wedding bells when he took that thirteenth step at Sex Addicts Anonymous.

Etymology: Romeo (Shakespeare's doomed lover) + roam (to go from place to place without purpose or direction.)

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Created by: Meganja

Pronunciation: a-or-tuh-tard

Sentence: Stop being a douchey, terrible judging AORTATARD and listen to your brain when it comes to falling in love.

Etymology:

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Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: BLUN-der-lust

Sentence: Elsie once again found herself suffering the pangs of failed blunderlust, looking for love in all the wrong places and for all the wrong reasons, and feeling used, abused and definitely discarded....and of course, vowing once again to never go that route again.

Etymology: Blend of 'blunder' (v. to err) and 'lust' (sexual urges), and a play on the word 'wanderlust'...(a strong, innate desire to rove or travel about)

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