Verboticisms

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: luv loynd

Sentence: Nothing was sadder than Elsie and Bessie,the Bovine Sisters, a pair of loveloined heifers. Their success at attracting true love was terribull...there had been no chance of oxtasy for them. They were always steered in the wrong direction and although they played the field, literally, they were never stampeded by suitors. They decided to join an on-loin dating service on their cowmputers. They only had one beef with this service, it was udderly impossibull to find a young stud who told the truth and did not shoot the bull. These mavericks were always born a "Taurus", owned their own spread and would love to be a fodder. Their names turned out not to be Angus or Delmonico, but Chuck or Stew. Any success the sisters had with this service was strictly oxcidental. When she herd what they had done, their mother had warned them that Internet dating always ended in steers.

Etymology: lovelorn (unhappy in love; suffering from unrequited love) & loin (a cut of meat taken from the side and back of an animal between the ribs and the rump)

----------------------------
COMMENTS:

Udderly Puntastic! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-11: 02:26:00

Gives a whole new meaning to beefcake! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-11: 11:37:00

----------------------------

| Comments and Points

Created by: GlobalGallery

Pronunciation: chair-ub

Sentence: Cupid's arrow had struck her, right through the heart. From now on there was only one serial killer for her and it was Ivan. His scarred shaven head and crazy eyes made her weak at the knees. She was his chairub and she fought hard to save him from the chair, despite the 11 witnesses who saw his axe wielding escapade. Her scented love letters were the last thing he would read, before his eyeballs boiled and exploded from the 2000 volt current that would pass through his oddly shaped head.

Etymology: 1.cherub - an angelic baby eg Cupid the Roman God of erotic love. 2. chair (electric) - a device used for capital punishment for the most heinous crimes.

----------------------------
COMMENTS:

Clever! Also plays on RUB, meaning difficulty or dilemma.. - readerwriter, 2009-02-11: 10:30:00

Electtrifying! Shocking! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-11: 11:41:00

What a sentence! Too bad it couldn't have been commuted...where is that Governor when you need him? - Nosila, 2009-02-14: 23:19:00

----------------------------

| Comments and Points

Created by: silveryaspen

Pronunciation: wood/wooed louse sited

Sentence: Honey Bunny looked on-yon world wide web for love. She searched walla to walla for a sweet one. Vid Alia, turned out to be a gorgin'. Chives was a bit too green. Sal Ad was a bit too red. Maui was a bit too far away. French Fryde turned yellow and ran away. So many were Rap Scallions. Honey Bunny finally realized, looking for love on the endearnet, oops, I mean the interknot, was very wooedlousesited!

Etymology: WOOED, LOUSE is a play on woodlouse. SIGHT/SITE. Wooed - actions taken when looking for love. Louse - undesirable bug, also slang for an undesiraable man. Sight - to use the eyes to look and see. Site - internet locations/domains. ..................... 'on yon' is another way to say onion. Now the following word plays on the names of onions might make better sense.

----------------------------
COMMENTS:

This week I seem to have a wiled hare ..... everyday. - silveryaspen, 2009-02-11: 02:46:00

thyme is a great healer - galwaywegian, 2009-02-11: 04:31:00

I think you're having too much fun with this. :) - kateinkorea, 2009-02-11: 09:40:00

I keep thinking of Easter instead of Valentine's Day - Jabberwocky, 2009-02-11: 10:43:00

Thanks for spicing it up a notch, galwaywegian. You are absolutely right, kateinkorea. Oh, Jabberwocky, so am I! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-11: 11:26:00

Your story has apeel, oh Lady of Shallot! It made my eyes leek. - Nosila, 2009-02-12: 00:35:00

----------------------------

| Comments and Points

Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: row man ts ihk

Sentence: Henry o' Tosis was such a romanthick, he couldn't score at a wallpaperer's convention. His chat-up lines had filled many emergency rooms with suspected vomiting epidemics. His lack of success with the fairer sex was always a mystery and a torment to his mother, with whom he lived. She would often scold him angrily, while swiping wildly about the room with her white stick.

Etymology: romantic , thick as in stupid

----------------------------
COMMENTS:

poor Henry - Jabberwocky, 2009-02-11: 10:41:00

sticking in through romanthin and romanthick! Love the play on Henry for Hal O' Tosis. Kudos for being most crafty! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-11: 12:08:00

the wallpaper convention is certainly thick with sticky romance I bet! - mweinmann, 2009-02-12: 09:13:00

----------------------------

| Comments and Points

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: mis-gahy-did

Sentence: Harry's search for amour is often missguided. He thought he had discovered a gold mine when he came across a neighborhood bar called the Velvet Boot that was frequented primarily by females. His flirtation always seems to be with Miss IDon'tThinkSo.

Etymology: miss (to fail to encounter, meet, catch) + Miss (a title of respect prefixed to the name of a unmarried woman) misguided (misled; mistaken)

| Comments and Points

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: skôrnikāted

Sentence: After his blind date fell through — some lame excuse about a car accident and coma — Tim decided to see if he could get some action at the new bar in town. As he entered he thought to himself ”My lucky night. Must be lady’s night, the place is full of chicks”. As he made his way around the bar every eye seemed to follow him as well as a mood of disgust. Finally he left the Silver Beaver without scoring but feeling scornicated.

Etymology: scorn (feel or express contempt or derision for) + fornicate (sexual intercourse between non-married partners)

----------------------------
COMMENTS:

Silver Beaver...Dam! - Nosila, 2010-08-25: 22:08:00

----------------------------

| Comments and Points

Created by: kateinkorea

Pronunciation: HAL HOLE TROLE

Sentence: Ever since she and Hal broke up she's got that void to fill...so where else can you go to fill it other than the same kind of hellhole...Hal's favourite watering hole. When she gets that look in her eyes, you can tell she's doing the Halholetroll.

Etymology: HAL: a man's name HELLHOLE: terrible place WATERING HOLE: slang for drinking place TROLL: slang for looking for a member of the opposite sex by putting out bait and waiting for someone to show interest

----------------------------
COMMENTS:

Gives a whole new meaning to holesome! etymology fits 'wrong places' to a T! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-11: 11:31:00

----------------------------

| Comments and Points

Created by: readerwriter

Pronunciation: gud-barr-ees-ta

Sentence: During her summer vacation, Miss Misty Pristine, tried working as a barista in the local tanning salon cum cafe, Sun Brew. She was so overt in her flirting attempts with the married insurance man who liked his French-pressed with hazelnut or the EMT studying to be a Paramedic who always asked for two shots in his Zippee, the house special. The local college students, making up courses in summer sessions, who loved her HavaJavaMints, called her The Goodbarista.

Etymology: From Looking for Mr. GOODBAR, the story of a young teacher looking for love + BARISTA, a mocha maker

----------------------------
COMMENTS:

terrific reference - Jabberwocky, 2009-02-11: 10:39:00

Also a well-crafted, very clever sentence - silveryaspen, 2009-02-11: 11:45:00

----------------------------

| Comments and Points

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: para moo er

Sentence: Elsie was just in the mooed to find a new paramooer. So she went with her bff, Bessie to a meat market...you know the kind of place we mean. Where the goods were well hung, the cowcktails affordabull and there was poll dancing. Their only prospects were a couple of shorthorns who were both Taurus and could be herd from far away. As usual the girls struck out, because the rodeo was in town and the beefcake drank elsewhere.

Etymology: Paramour (a woman's lover;a woman who cohabits with an important man) & Mooer (a cow, who moos)

----------------------------
COMMENTS:

brilliant! - galwaywegian, 2010-08-25: 04:28:00

I am glad it mooved you! - Nosila, 2010-08-26: 23:48:00

----------------------------

| Comments and Points

Created by: splendiction

Pronunciation: luvprowler

Sentence: Mimi wiggled her pink nose. She immediately recognized Ted as the loveprowlerr he had become; he could only bear to skulk the outer regions of the woods in which bearly any of his kind still lived. Ted habitually came down and out onto the meadow every day, loveprowlerring for fearful creatures he mistakenly grew fond feelings for. Mimi trembled, keeping close to her log home, as she watched Ted tilt his head in earnest regard her. (Would she be his lover or his dinner?)!

Etymology: loveprowlerr n. From the words prowl, lover and err. It means one who prowls, instintively searches (not knowing why) for love but errs, make errors of judgement.

| Comments and Points