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'Check your lipstick Madge'

DEFINITION: n. A person who habitually looks for love in the all the wrong places and wonders why it always turns out wrong. v. To look for love in the wrong places.

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Verboticisms

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Missguided

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: mis-gahy-did

Sentence: Harry's search for amour is often missguided. He thought he had discovered a gold mine when he came across a neighborhood bar called the Velvet Boot that was frequented primarily by females. His flirtation always seems to be with Miss IDon'tThinkSo.

Etymology: miss (to fail to encounter, meet, catch) + Miss (a title of respect prefixed to the name of a unmarried woman) misguided (misled; mistaken)

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Wooedlousited

Created by: silveryaspen

Pronunciation: wood/wooed louse sited

Sentence: Honey Bunny looked on-yon world wide web for love. She searched walla to walla for a sweet one. Vid Alia, turned out to be a gorgin'. Chives was a bit too green. Sal Ad was a bit too red. Maui was a bit too far away. French Fryde turned yellow and ran away. So many were Rap Scallions. Honey Bunny finally realized, looking for love on the endearnet, oops, I mean the interknot, was very wooedlousesited!

Etymology: WOOED, LOUSE is a play on woodlouse. SIGHT/SITE. Wooed - actions taken when looking for love. Louse - undesirable bug, also slang for an undesiraable man. Sight - to use the eyes to look and see. Site - internet locations/domains. ..................... 'on yon' is another way to say onion. Now the following word plays on the names of onions might make better sense.

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COMMENTS:

This week I seem to have a wiled hare ..... everyday. - silveryaspen, 2009-02-11: 02:46:00

thyme is a great healer - galwaywegian, 2009-02-11: 04:31:00

I think you're having too much fun with this. :) - kateinkorea, 2009-02-11: 09:40:00

I keep thinking of Easter instead of Valentine's Day - Jabberwocky, 2009-02-11: 10:43:00

Thanks for spicing it up a notch, galwaywegian. You are absolutely right, kateinkorea. Oh, Jabberwocky, so am I! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-11: 11:26:00

Your story has apeel, oh Lady of Shallot! It made my eyes leek. - Nosila, 2009-02-12: 00:35:00

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Stalkmarket

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: stok mar ket

Sentence: When Bessie and Clarabelle were looking for dates, they went to the local stalkmarket. It never worked as their chosen dates turned it into a night of whine and roses. Where could they find love that would allow them to live happily heifer after?

Etymology: Stalk (the act of following prey stealthily) & Stock Market(an exchange where security trading is conducted by professional stockbrokers) & Meat Market(not just an actual shop for selling meat, but slang for a bar where people pick up each other)

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Scornicated

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: skôrnikāted

Sentence: After his blind date fell through — some lame excuse about a car accident and coma — Tim decided to see if he could get some action at the new bar in town. As he entered he thought to himself ”My lucky night. Must be lady’s night, the place is full of chicks”. As he made his way around the bar every eye seemed to follow him as well as a mood of disgust. Finally he left the Silver Beaver without scoring but feeling scornicated.

Etymology: scorn (feel or express contempt or derision for) + fornicate (sexual intercourse between non-married partners)

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COMMENTS:

Silver Beaver...Dam! - Nosila, 2010-08-25: 22:08:00

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Concupid

Created by: spotter

Pronunciation: Con cue pid

Sentence: Rick was concupid looking for love in the pharmacy. Marta said, "Suzy is so concupid."

Etymology: Con=Anti; Against Cupid= A symbol of love Therefor; Against a symbol of love

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Romanthick

Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: row man th ik

Sentence: his romanthick streak left him with a broken heart, two missing teeth and a black eye

Etymology: romantic, thick

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COMMENTS:

desthpicable!love it - Nosila, 2010-08-25: 22:07:00

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Goodbarista

Created by: readerwriter

Pronunciation: gud-barr-ees-ta

Sentence: During her summer vacation, Miss Misty Pristine, tried working as a barista in the local tanning salon cum cafe, Sun Brew. She was so overt in her flirting attempts with the married insurance man who liked his French-pressed with hazelnut or the EMT studying to be a Paramedic who always asked for two shots in his Zippee, the house special. The local college students, making up courses in summer sessions, who loved her HavaJavaMints, called her The Goodbarista.

Etymology: From Looking for Mr. GOODBAR, the story of a young teacher looking for love + BARISTA, a mocha maker

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COMMENTS:

terrific reference - Jabberwocky, 2009-02-11: 10:39:00

Also a well-crafted, very clever sentence - silveryaspen, 2009-02-11: 11:45:00

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Libidohno

Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: li/bee/doe/oe/no

Sentence: Once again Sally was a victim of libidohno when she was lead by her errant hormones to a singles bar for transvestites.(not that there's anything wrong with that)

Etymology: libido + "oh no"

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COMMENTS:

being lead, her errant hormones were heavy metal? - readerwriter, 2009-02-11: 10:25:00

reminds me of the farside cartoons - silveryaspen, 2009-02-11: 13:38:00

Dunno which is worse...errant hormones or truant hormones. Eggzellunt word. - Mustang, 2009-02-11: 22:11:00

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Loveloined

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: luv loynd

Sentence: Nothing was sadder than Elsie and Bessie,the Bovine Sisters, a pair of loveloined heifers. Their success at attracting true love was terribull...there had been no chance of oxtasy for them. They were always steered in the wrong direction and although they played the field, literally, they were never stampeded by suitors. They decided to join an on-loin dating service on their cowmputers. They only had one beef with this service, it was udderly impossibull to find a young stud who told the truth and did not shoot the bull. These mavericks were always born a "Taurus", owned their own spread and would love to be a fodder. Their names turned out not to be Angus or Delmonico, but Chuck or Stew. Any success the sisters had with this service was strictly oxcidental. When she herd what they had done, their mother had warned them that Internet dating always ended in steers.

Etymology: lovelorn (unhappy in love; suffering from unrequited love) & loin (a cut of meat taken from the side and back of an animal between the ribs and the rump)

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COMMENTS:

Udderly Puntastic! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-11: 02:26:00

Gives a whole new meaning to beefcake! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-11: 11:37:00

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Roameo

hyperborean

Created by: hyperborean

Pronunciation: rome-ee-oh

Sentence: He was getting lots of action, but couldn't find a nice girl to settle down with him. Could it be he was a roameo? He still hoped to hear wedding bells when he took that thirteenth step at Sex Addicts Anonymous.

Etymology: Romeo (Shakespeare's doomed lover) + roam (to go from place to place without purpose or direction.)

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Comments:

silveryaspen - 2009-02-11: 12:33:00
Really enjoyed today's definition, James. It inspired such a remarkable variety of clever verbotomies,

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2009-02-11: 22:33:00
Thanks Silveryaspen! After reading the words today, it looks like a few of us have fell victim to blunderlust! I guess there is more than a few romanthick libidohnos among us. ~ James

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-08-25: 00:12:00
Today's definition was suggested by verbotomy. Thank you verbotomy. ~ James