Verboticisms

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: mādnchois

Sentence: Joice always seems to make the maidenchoice. She always seems to make decisions that keep her from meeting guys. Whether it's where she lives, between two retirement communities or her job in the morgue, she rarely finds herself in a position to meet anyone datable. The last handsome young man she saw in person was very cold, laying on a stainless steel table. The ugly hole in his head was a major deterrent to a night on the town.

Etymology: maiden (a girl or young woman, esp. an unmarried one) + choice (an act of selecting or making a decision when faced with two or more possibilities)

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COMMENTS:

Does that mean that all the young women who live on Maiden Choice Lane won't find suiters? - otherguy, 2009-02-11: 07:28:00

or suitors... :-) - wayoffcenter, 2009-02-11: 07:59:00

Yes she's in a job where there is stiff competition to find a live one...especially with that co-worker of hers, Myra Mains! - Nosila, 2009-02-12: 00:39:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: luv loynd

Sentence: Nothing was sadder than Elsie and Bessie,the Bovine Sisters, a pair of loveloined heifers. Their success at attracting true love was terribull...there had been no chance of oxtasy for them. They were always steered in the wrong direction and although they played the field, literally, they were never stampeded by suitors. They decided to join an on-loin dating service on their cowmputers. They only had one beef with this service, it was udderly impossibull to find a young stud who told the truth and did not shoot the bull. These mavericks were always born a "Taurus", owned their own spread and would love to be a fodder. Their names turned out not to be Angus or Delmonico, but Chuck or Stew. Any success the sisters had with this service was strictly oxcidental. When she herd what they had done, their mother had warned them that Internet dating always ended in steers.

Etymology: lovelorn (unhappy in love; suffering from unrequited love) & loin (a cut of meat taken from the side and back of an animal between the ribs and the rump)

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COMMENTS:

Udderly Puntastic! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-11: 02:26:00

Gives a whole new meaning to beefcake! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-11: 11:37:00

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Created by: readerwriter

Pronunciation: gud-barr-ees-ta

Sentence: During her summer vacation, Miss Misty Pristine, tried working as a barista in the local tanning salon cum cafe, Sun Brew. She was so overt in her flirting attempts with the married insurance man who liked his French-pressed with hazelnut or the EMT studying to be a Paramedic who always asked for two shots in his Zippee, the house special. The local college students, making up courses in summer sessions, who loved her HavaJavaMints, called her The Goodbarista.

Etymology: From Looking for Mr. GOODBAR, the story of a young teacher looking for love + BARISTA, a mocha maker

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COMMENTS:

terrific reference - Jabberwocky, 2009-02-11: 10:39:00

Also a well-crafted, very clever sentence - silveryaspen, 2009-02-11: 11:45:00

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Created by: artr

Pronunciation: skôrnikāted

Sentence: After his blind date fell through — some lame excuse about a car accident and coma — Tim decided to see if he could get some action at the new bar in town. As he entered he thought to himself ”My lucky night. Must be lady’s night, the place is full of chicks”. As he made his way around the bar every eye seemed to follow him as well as a mood of disgust. Finally he left the Silver Beaver without scoring but feeling scornicated.

Etymology: scorn (feel or express contempt or derision for) + fornicate (sexual intercourse between non-married partners)

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COMMENTS:

Silver Beaver...Dam! - Nosila, 2010-08-25: 22:08:00

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Created by: Negatrev

Pronunciation: Proff-lee-date

Sentence: Dave will never find love while he continues to be proflidate. Sharon realized that proflidating was getting her nowhere.

Etymology: From dating (To go on a date or dates with) and profligate (adj. unrestrained by convention or morality; "Congreve draws a debauched aristocratic society"; "deplorably dissipated and degraded"; "riotous living"; "fast women") AND (noun. someone who dissipates resources self-indulgently or a wasteful person)

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Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: row man ts ihk

Sentence: Henry o' Tosis was such a romanthick, he couldn't score at a wallpaperer's convention. His chat-up lines had filled many emergency rooms with suspected vomiting epidemics. His lack of success with the fairer sex was always a mystery and a torment to his mother, with whom he lived. She would often scold him angrily, while swiping wildly about the room with her white stick.

Etymology: romantic , thick as in stupid

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COMMENTS:

poor Henry - Jabberwocky, 2009-02-11: 10:41:00

sticking in through romanthin and romanthick! Love the play on Henry for Hal O' Tosis. Kudos for being most crafty! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-11: 12:08:00

the wallpaper convention is certainly thick with sticky romance I bet! - mweinmann, 2009-02-12: 09:13:00

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Created by: Meganja

Pronunciation: a-or-tuh-tard

Sentence: Stop being a douchey, terrible judging AORTATARD and listen to your brain when it comes to falling in love.

Etymology:

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Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: BLUN-der-lust

Sentence: Elsie once again found herself suffering the pangs of failed blunderlust, looking for love in all the wrong places and for all the wrong reasons, and feeling used, abused and definitely discarded....and of course, vowing once again to never go that route again.

Etymology: Blend of 'blunder' (v. to err) and 'lust' (sexual urges), and a play on the word 'wanderlust'...(a strong, innate desire to rove or travel about)

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Created by: GlobalGallery

Pronunciation: chair-ub

Sentence: Cupid's arrow had struck her, right through the heart. From now on there was only one serial killer for her and it was Ivan. His scarred shaven head and crazy eyes made her weak at the knees. She was his chairub and she fought hard to save him from the chair, despite the 11 witnesses who saw his axe wielding escapade. Her scented love letters were the last thing he would read, before his eyeballs boiled and exploded from the 2000 volt current that would pass through his oddly shaped head.

Etymology: 1.cherub - an angelic baby eg Cupid the Roman God of erotic love. 2. chair (electric) - a device used for capital punishment for the most heinous crimes.

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COMMENTS:

Clever! Also plays on RUB, meaning difficulty or dilemma.. - readerwriter, 2009-02-11: 10:30:00

Electtrifying! Shocking! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-11: 11:41:00

What a sentence! Too bad it couldn't have been commuted...where is that Governor when you need him? - Nosila, 2009-02-14: 23:19:00

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Created by: idavecook

Pronunciation: WUh-KIN-PA-NUH-B

Sentence: "Wookin' pa nub in all da wong pwaces, wookinpanub..."

Etymology: Eddy, the brother of that guy on Chapelle's Show.

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COMMENTS:

Sounds also like Buckwheat (Eddie Murphy) singing "Baby Nub" on the old Saturday Night Live Shows... - Nosila, 2009-02-14: 23:22:00

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