Verboticism: Assumetote

'Why do you always carry that file folder?'

DEFINITION: n. A prop (e.g. papers, files or any non-functional equipment) used to create the illusion of busyness. v. To use office supplies to create the illusion that you are working.

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Fibdjet

giveaphuk

Created by: giveaphuk

Pronunciation: Fib De Jet

Sentence: she fibdjeted with pieces of paper while looking @ the clock waiting from home time.

Etymology: Fib = to like & djet - ending of word fidget - meaning to behave or move nervously or restlessly.

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Evidesk

Created by: bookwerm18

Pronunciation: Eh-vee-deh-sk

Sentence: The pile of evidesks on my table collapsed today, demonstrating how overworked I actually am.

Etymology: Evidence + Desk

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Slothouflage

Created by: bigdog

Pronunciation: slawth-o-flazhe

Sentence: The piles of paper on my desk are all just slothouflage to stop the boss from seeing my pillow and scotch bottle.

Etymology: sloth (indolence) + camouflage (disguise)

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Importmanteau

Created by: rephil

Pronunciation: im-PORT-man-toh

Sentence: Gerry's importmanteau always impressed visitors, but the maintenance man's keys signified he held more true power in the building.

Etymology: import -- rank, necessity, gravity; portmanteau -- a suitcase

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COMMENTS:

this is a great word!! - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-13: 14:48:00

Thanks -- I know I've had a few in my time! - rephil, 2007-06-13: 14:50:00

Erm -- importmanteaux, not great words! - rephil, 2007-06-13: 14:51:00

actually your words are terrific - there have just been so many good words to choose from lately - I especially like euphonia - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-13: 15:17:00

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Simulaborig

metrohumanx

Created by: metrohumanx

Pronunciation: SIM-uhl-AY-bore-ig

Sentence: The Bearded One entered with a brushed-aluminum clipboard under his arm, knowing it would cause a stir amongst the real workers. Every week he carried a new SIMULABORIG which gave the impression of semi-competence and enthusiasm which fooled no one. Last time it was a P.D.A. which made his productivity plummet faster than his dignity. His vain attempts to impress the boss ranged from a simple legal pad to a glowing little spaceship planted in his ear. Last year he attemped to SIMULABORIG a staff meeting but the only wireless hotspot was behind his sweaty forehead. The office joke was that he had a whole toybox full of SIMULABORIGS to shamelessly display at every opportunity. His manifolderol seemed to have no end. He would always carry some ubiquitool, unencumbered by any knowledge of its function. Particularly fond of pseudotechnocrap, he subscribed to every high-end gizmoid catalog available. Despite the appearance of The Bearded One's weekly McGuffen, his job performance brought new meaning to the word "adequate".

Etymology: SIMUlate+lABOr+RIG=SIMULABORIG_____ simulate: to give or assume the appearance or effect of... often with the intent to deceive--Latin "simulatus", past participle of "simulare"... to copy, represent, feign, from similis "like"_____ labor: expenditure of physical or mental effort especially when difficult or compulsory-Middle English, from Anglo-French labur, from Latin labor; perhaps akin to Latin labare to totter, labi to slip_____rig: to make or construct hastily or in a makeshift manner-Me riggen,prob of Scand.orig____variations: simulaborite, simulaborana, simulaborat, simulaborology etc.

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx http://isitchristmas.com/ - metrohumanx, 2008-08-06: 08:41:00

metrohumanx My name is MetrohumanX and I improve this message. - metrohumanx, 2008-08-06: 16:26:00

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Evidiligence

Created by: ErWenn

Pronunciation: /ˌɛvəˈdɪlədʒɛns/

Sentence: While folders and papers make excellent passive evidiligence for someone on the move, a mobile phone or PDA can serve the same purpose even when seated at one's desk, though such tools require an active effort to complete the effect of slackofflage.

Etymology: From evidence + diligence

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COMMENTS:

very on-message you evidiligently gave it a lot of thought. - galwaywegian, 2007-06-13: 07:03:00

Don't indilige him. - Clayton, 2007-06-13: 07:50:00

Actually, I didn't give it that much thought. I just borrowed some thoughts I'd had from when I created the previous verboticism "slackofflage." I've noticed that some of my highest-scoring words are ones I was least confident in (such as "mockliment.") Maybe there's a message there. Maybe I just give everything too much thought. Yeah, that seems more likely. - ErWenn, 2007-06-13: 14:02:00

now now ErWenn - you know what they say about making ASSumptions - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-13: 14:20:00

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Fileusion

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: fyl loo zhun

Sentence: He was the Great Pretender in our office. Sadly, because he was a male, he got away with it for way longer than any female would even dare try. Yes, Seymour Dolittle, was a fileusion. He would stalk the halls carrying a file folder and pretend to "do his rounds" with nothing more than what turned out to be a pizza place menu and and a bus schedule in his file folder. He fooled the senior management for over 5 years (the ladies in the company twigged on after a year or two, but had nowhere to lodge their concerns). When the cuts came, no one could salvage Seymour, as he worked for no one, did not report to anyone and could never successfully explain his presence in the hallowed halls. Luckily for him, he worked long enough to collect a great pension, unemployment insurance and a tasty severance for all his hard-worked time. Nice work if you can get it...and he wasn't even a CEO of anything!

Etymology: File (a set of related records (either written or electronic) kept together) & Illusion (an erroneous mental representation; the act of deluding; deception by creating illusory ideas; an illusory feat; considered magical by naive observers)

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Docuflage

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: DOCK-yew-flawj

Sentence: Harper fancied himself a very clever tactician, using an old empty attache case as docuflage, believing that coworkers were convinced that he was actually packing a large work schedule, though everyone in the office had been on to his scam for years.

Etymology: Blend of the words 'document' (various paperwork) and 'camouflage' (a device or stratagem used for concealment)

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Phantofiles

Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: fan/tuh/files

Sentence: John had six different coloured sets of phantofiles he alternated at various times of the day to keep 'The Man' off his case and to demonstrate his industriousness and multitasking abilities. "Damn, he's good!" thought his boss. "He's completed three different projects today and it's only noon." John's phantofiles put him in line for a raise.

Etymology: phantom + files

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COMMENTS:

hmm - good ploy - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-13: 10:53:00

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Earpencil

Created by: texmom

Pronunciation: Eer pen sill

Sentence: He wandered around with an earpencil as if he were doing math.

Etymology: ear - yeah the body part pencil - simple graphic tool

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