Verboticisms

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: mawk sen it tee

Sentence: Mrs. Beach, the English teacher hated profanity and forbade her students from using any of these words in her classroom. Kids being kids in today's society of course cannot speak without cursing. To keep from being expelled and yet express his youthful dramatics, one brain surgeon in her class found a solution. He developed the mockscenity code. When he wanted to use a curse word, he had to substitute the first letter of that word with a "p" and if the first letter was a vowel, he just put the p in front of it. Pam, it worked like a pitch. It knocked the phit out of bad-sounding words and before long the whole ploody class was using it, pell yes. Mrs. Beach however had been a decryptor with the CIA before she retired to teaching and announced one morning, loudly, "The puck stops here!"

Etymology: Mock (a copy or imitation of something; imitate with mockery and derision) & Obscenity (an offensive or indecent word or phrase)

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: fo kuss

Sentence: Dr.Seemore Glasses was an optometrist and normally a man of vision. Born a Presbyopic, he'd rather ride the cataracts than attend Church or Temple. He was short-sighted in one aspect: he was afraid to make a spectacle of himself in front of his clients. Although it sounded cornea, he hated to swear in front of them. He would tell them he needed to fauxcuss, when they did or said something stupid. One fellow kept making an astigmatism of himself, so Dr. Seemore stopped seeing him, before their macular degenerated anymore. Through his contacts, the doctor also teaches at the university and lens his experience to the newbies. Unfortunately, the boring nature of eye topics often made his pupils dilate. One day he fauxcussed on his lovely assistant, Iris,who he claimed was untidy, blind to messes and kept their office like a sty. She in turn accused Dr. Seemore of ogling her. Although it later turned out that she was bipolarized and also binocular, she pressed charges. As the police led away the good Dr.Seemore, he was heard to yell, "I've been framed!"

Etymology: Faux (not genuine or real; being an imitation of the genuine article) & Cuss (profane or obscene expression usually of surprise or anger;utter obscenities or profanities)

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COMMENTS:

Good word! - Mustang, 2008-05-08: 07:45:00

best word this month!! - galwaywegian, 2008-05-08: 12:13:00

The story alone is worth a vote! - pieceof314, 2008-05-08: 14:05:00

wow - so many good words today - Jabberwocky, 2008-05-08: 14:22:00

Spot on - Love it! - Tigger, 2008-05-08: 18:59:00

Excellent. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-05-08: 19:35:00

My fave - arrrteest, 2008-05-08: 22:39:00

I'd like to thank the members of the Academy...Cheers All! - Nosila, 2008-05-08: 23:09:00

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Created by: Rutilus

Pronunciation: sub-yooz

Sentence: "Piece off" she yelled to the young man crossing the road. Jemima's impatience and road rage was leading her to subuse people in the most public places.

Etymology: sub (from substitute) - to replace; abuse (v) - to insult, cause harm to others

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Created by: abrakadeborah

Pronunciation: cus-ple-tive

Sentence: Just because you use cusspletive words around me...don't think I'm too old to not know what you're really calling me!

Etymology: Cuss - Alteration of curse. Pletive - taken in part from 'expletive'- An interjectory word or expression, frequently profane.

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Created by: Tigger

Pronunciation: (like 'placebo') /pluh-SEE-bohth/

Sentence: Sandra, a mother of three children and a former radio DJ, had trained herself never to swear, but she would often use placeboaths in place of profanity. So, when she yelled at Bobby, "Cheese and Crackers!! Get your gosh darn feet off the coffee table and stop acting like a fudging sugarhead!" nobody thought it was unusual. After all, Bobby really had been acting like a sugarhead.

Etymology: Placebo - a medication prescribed more for the mental relief of the patient than for its actual effect (Latin, placebo "I shall please") + Oath - any profane expression; curse; swearword (from Middle English, ooth "swear" [to a god or diety])

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COMMENTS:

an elegant creation, I must say - stache, 2008-05-08: 08:22:00

very nice - Jabberwocky, 2008-05-08: 14:21:00

Terrific! - OZZIEBOB, 2008-05-08: 19:37:00

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Created by: Ismelstar

Pronunciation: [yoo-efuh-miz-uhm]

Sentence: Pristine, soft-spoken and mild, the limits of Molly Mormon's patience had finally expired after Danny overturned a perfume bottle under her desk. "Oh my Heck!" she blurted unable to stop the youeffemisms tumbling out of her mouth. "You little Ess. Just get the Eff out of my class!"

Etymology: A play with the imperative forms of bowdlerized swear words, (which generally are used by naming only the first letter of the offending curse) which sounds like 'euphemism', the substitution of a mild, indirect, or vague expression for one thought to be offensive or harsh.

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Created by: mrskellyscl

Pronunciation: ex-pleh-toot

Sentence: Mommy often had to expletute words around the baby, who was beginning to show an uncanny ability to imitate her speech patterns, especially when she was having a discussion with daddy about golf.

Etymology: expletive: vulgar or coarse word to express emotion + substitute: a replacement

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Created by: WarriorCatGoddess

Pronunciation: More-fit-ing

Sentence: The boy was morfiting at his teacher for giving him an F on his quiz.

Etymology:

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Created by: youmustvotenato

Pronunciation: rhymes with purse

Sentence: While reading Huck Finn in his 8th grade class, we had to blurse all the racial slurs replacing "n*****" with "no gooder".

Etymology: bleep+curse

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Created by: LittleMissSmile

Pronunciation: Frick

Sentence: What the FRICK!?!

Etymology:

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