Verboticisms

Created by: Ismelstar

Pronunciation: [yoo-efuh-miz-uhm]

Sentence: Pristine, soft-spoken and mild, the limits of Molly Mormon's patience had finally expired after Danny overturned a perfume bottle under her desk. "Oh my Heck!" she blurted unable to stop the youeffemisms tumbling out of her mouth. "You little Ess. Just get the Eff out of my class!"

Etymology: A play with the imperative forms of bowdlerized swear words, (which generally are used by naming only the first letter of the offending curse) which sounds like 'euphemism', the substitution of a mild, indirect, or vague expression for one thought to be offensive or harsh.

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: fo kuss

Sentence: Dr.Seemore Glasses was an optometrist and normally a man of vision. Born a Presbyopic, he'd rather ride the cataracts than attend Church or Temple. He was short-sighted in one aspect: he was afraid to make a spectacle of himself in front of his clients. Although it sounded cornea, he hated to swear in front of them. He would tell them he needed to fauxcuss, when they did or said something stupid. One fellow kept making an astigmatism of himself, so Dr. Seemore stopped seeing him, before their macular degenerated anymore. Through his contacts, the doctor also teaches at the university and lens his experience to the newbies. Unfortunately, the boring nature of eye topics often made his pupils dilate. One day he fauxcussed on his lovely assistant, Iris,who he claimed was untidy, blind to messes and kept their office like a sty. She in turn accused Dr. Seemore of ogling her. Although it later turned out that she was bipolarized and also binocular, she pressed charges. As the police led away the good Dr.Seemore, he was heard to yell, "I've been framed!"

Etymology: Faux (not genuine or real; being an imitation of the genuine article) & Cuss (profane or obscene expression usually of surprise or anger;utter obscenities or profanities)

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COMMENTS:

Good word! - Mustang, 2008-05-08: 07:45:00

best word this month!! - galwaywegian, 2008-05-08: 12:13:00

The story alone is worth a vote! - pieceof314, 2008-05-08: 14:05:00

wow - so many good words today - Jabberwocky, 2008-05-08: 14:22:00

Spot on - Love it! - Tigger, 2008-05-08: 18:59:00

Excellent. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-05-08: 19:35:00

My fave - arrrteest, 2008-05-08: 22:39:00

I'd like to thank the members of the Academy...Cheers All! - Nosila, 2008-05-08: 23:09:00

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Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: code/vurs

Sentence: Around the office, us lackies have to codeverse so we don't offend the boss, or her prim and proper manager with our foul language. When angry at a co-worker, we often shout at them "Go f'coffee!", or "Eat hit, you bit head!", but so far our codeversations haven't raised the ire of the language police.

Etymology: code + converse (To engage in spoken exchange)

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Created by: arrrteest

Pronunciation: dis-kuss-fem-izm

Sentence: Tony was sitting in a chair in the principal's office again. "Tony, can you explain to me what you meant by 'dime beach?'" "Yeah, I went to a beach that charged a dime to go to it! I was just remembering it and I said it outloud. To nobody really, but Mrs. Fluster just happened to be there." The principal looked at him and shook his head. "Now Tony, yesterday you were in here for calling a classmate a 'shucking fithead' and tried to tell me that a fithead is what they call a healthy person who processes oysters. You're not fooling anyone, buddy. You've got to stop this discussphemism or you'll be finding yourself explaining this to your parents while you are on suspension!

Etymology: dis, disrespect + cuss, curse + phemism, from euphemism

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Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: marss/code

Sentence: Marsecode, derived from marseholecode is used by people who feel more comfortable using only morsels of bad language.

Etymology: Morse code + arse

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COMMENTS:

you brits kill me. - stache, 2008-05-08: 08:20:00

I like it. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-05-08: 19:36:00

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Created by: splendiction

Pronunciation: pro fam i li ty

Sentence: The Goode’s espoused family values and so expressed anger with profamility like “fudge” and “mitt” instead of good old four-letter words such ass f*** and ***t.

Etymology: From profanity and family.

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COMMENTS:

Whoops-didn't mean to add the extra s to as! - splendiction, 2009-06-22: 20:30:00

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Created by: didsbury

Pronunciation: pro-f-eye-nn

Sentence: I'm sorry officer but you must have misheard me. If we do go to court I think you will find that 'crucking funt' is a profinity and not a profanity.

Etymology: Turning the profane into the profine was an art form perfected by the French aristocracy in the early years of the republic. They were also helped by atrocious aural hygiene standards during this period of history.

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COMMENTS:

reminds me of the guy on Capitol Steps who tells the stories with initial letters transposed. One concluded thast Haris Pilton simply needed a little soap in her hole; then there was the spale of Elliot Titzler.... - stache, 2008-05-08: 19:02:00

...er, Titzer. You know, the guy wh went to all the hicey prookers? nd I mean hicey. We're not talking bwenty tucks. No, not birty thucks. No, not even borty...never mind. - stache, 2008-05-08: 19:05:00

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Created by: WarriorCatGoddess

Pronunciation: More-fit-ing

Sentence: The boy was morfiting at his teacher for giving him an F on his quiz.

Etymology:

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Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: proxy/fan/i/tee

Sentence: Sally was determined not to use unsuitable language at her new job and instead invented many proxfanitys to suit the occasion.

Etymology: proxy (substitute or surrogate) + profanity

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COMMENTS:

Good one! - Mustang, 2009-06-23: 00:44:00

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Created by: Rutilus

Pronunciation: sub-yooz

Sentence: "Piece off" she yelled to the young man crossing the road. Jemima's impatience and road rage was leading her to subuse people in the most public places.

Etymology: sub (from substitute) - to replace; abuse (v) - to insult, cause harm to others

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