Verboticisms

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: fo kuss

Sentence: Dr.Seemore Glasses was an optometrist and normally a man of vision. Born a Presbyopic, he'd rather ride the cataracts than attend Church or Temple. He was short-sighted in one aspect: he was afraid to make a spectacle of himself in front of his clients. Although it sounded cornea, he hated to swear in front of them. He would tell them he needed to fauxcuss, when they did or said something stupid. One fellow kept making an astigmatism of himself, so Dr. Seemore stopped seeing him, before their macular degenerated anymore. Through his contacts, the doctor also teaches at the university and lens his experience to the newbies. Unfortunately, the boring nature of eye topics often made his pupils dilate. One day he fauxcussed on his lovely assistant, Iris,who he claimed was untidy, blind to messes and kept their office like a sty. She in turn accused Dr. Seemore of ogling her. Although it later turned out that she was bipolarized and also binocular, she pressed charges. As the police led away the good Dr.Seemore, he was heard to yell, "I've been framed!"

Etymology: Faux (not genuine or real; being an imitation of the genuine article) & Cuss (profane or obscene expression usually of surprise or anger;utter obscenities or profanities)

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COMMENTS:

Good word! - Mustang, 2008-05-08: 07:45:00

best word this month!! - galwaywegian, 2008-05-08: 12:13:00

The story alone is worth a vote! - pieceof314, 2008-05-08: 14:05:00

wow - so many good words today - Jabberwocky, 2008-05-08: 14:22:00

Spot on - Love it! - Tigger, 2008-05-08: 18:59:00

Excellent. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-05-08: 19:35:00

My fave - arrrteest, 2008-05-08: 22:39:00

I'd like to thank the members of the Academy...Cheers All! - Nosila, 2008-05-08: 23:09:00

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Created by: petaj

Pronunciation: you-feck-miz-m

Sentence: Gordon Ramsay's kitchen nightmares had to be dubbed with eupheckmisms before it could be screened on the family viewing channel.

Etymology: euphemism (word or phrase used to stand in for a taboo word, or topic that is unpleasant to talk about) + feck (irish eupheckmism for the f word)

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COMMENTS:

Good one, petaj...Gordon Ramsay was a feckin' eejit long before it was fashionable to be so... - Nosila, 2008-05-08: 23:19:00

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Created by: LittleMissSmile

Pronunciation: Frick

Sentence: What the FRICK!?!

Etymology:

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Created by: artr

Pronunciation: fōfanətē

Sentence: Marge is the queen of fauxfanity. Her coworkers have no doubt how she feels even though she tries to remain semi-polite by using substitutes for profane language. Phrases like "No friggin' way", "What the fudge","Kiss my bass" or "Go hug yourself" have raised more than a few eyebrows.

Etymology: faux (artificial or imitation) + profanity (blasphemous or obscene language)

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COMMENTS:

similar combinations but different results - great word - Jabberwocky, 2009-06-22: 14:18:00

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Created by: artr

Pronunciation: hek-spli-tiv

Sentence: As the pastor of his church John can't use profane language. As a human that is subject to anger or pain, he has found his own set of heckspletives to get him through these times. Where someone else might say "Shut the F___ up", John will say "Hush the frog up". Where someone else might tell someone to "Go to Hell", John smiles tells them to "have a nice time at the BBQ". Even though he gets blank stares sometimes, he feels better that he knows what he meant.

Etymology: heck (used as a mild expression of annoyance, rejection, disgust, etc.) + expletive (an interjectory word or expression, frequently profane; an exclamatory oath)

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: yoo fen iz im

Sentence: When Barney and his Mom fought it was funny. When they spoke of the other, they only said a youphenism, instead of the really rude words they were thinking.

Etymology: You (2nd person singular) & Euphenism (A euphemism is a substitution of an agreeable or less offensive expression in place of one that may offend or suggest something unpleasant to the listener,[1] or in the case of doublespeak, to make it less troublesome for the speaker.)

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Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: code/vurs

Sentence: Around the office, us lackies have to codeverse so we don't offend the boss, or her prim and proper manager with our foul language. When angry at a co-worker, we often shout at them "Go f'coffee!", or "Eat hit, you bit head!", but so far our codeversations haven't raised the ire of the language police.

Etymology: code + converse (To engage in spoken exchange)

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Created by: pieceof314

Pronunciation: sub-ter-fyood

Sentence: Marvin mumbled under his breath, "You rockem sockem, bean pole ridin, frickin, dung eating, rear end of a moose's petutie." "What?" responded his partner, "You can certainly come up with better subterfeud than that, can't you?" "Uh, what a BEACH!"

Etymology: subterfuge, Late Latin subterfugium, from Latin subterfugere to escape, evade, from subter- secretly (from subter underneath; + fugere to flee + feud, a mutual enmity or quarrel that is often prolonged or inveterate

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Created by: arrrteest

Pronunciation: dis-kuss-fem-izm

Sentence: Tony was sitting in a chair in the principal's office again. "Tony, can you explain to me what you meant by 'dime beach?'" "Yeah, I went to a beach that charged a dime to go to it! I was just remembering it and I said it outloud. To nobody really, but Mrs. Fluster just happened to be there." The principal looked at him and shook his head. "Now Tony, yesterday you were in here for calling a classmate a 'shucking fithead' and tried to tell me that a fithead is what they call a healthy person who processes oysters. You're not fooling anyone, buddy. You've got to stop this discussphemism or you'll be finding yourself explaining this to your parents while you are on suspension!

Etymology: dis, disrespect + cuss, curse + phemism, from euphemism

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Created by: mrskellyscl

Pronunciation: ex-pleh-toot

Sentence: Mommy often had to expletute words around the baby, who was beginning to show an uncanny ability to imitate her speech patterns, especially when she was having a discussion with daddy about golf.

Etymology: expletive: vulgar or coarse word to express emotion + substitute: a replacement

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