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'Why do you always carry that file folder?'

DEFINITION: n. A prop (e.g. papers, files or any non-functional equipment) used to create the illusion of busyness. v. To use office supplies to create the illusion that you are working.

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Verboticisms

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Dosserier

Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: dosss err eee ay

Sentence: he carried his dosserier with him everywhere, adding different coloured stickies each month or so to keep it looking fresh. He called it his licence to kill....time.

Etymology: dossier, dosser

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COMMENTS:

Hopefully the use of his dosserier won't come back to kick him in the dosserriere. - Clayton, 2007-06-13: 07:48:00

Maybe he carried it in a fanny pack - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-13: 09:26:00

How cheeky! - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-13: 10:36:00

i hate to butt in, but is there no rear end to these pun threads?! - jadenguy, 2007-06-13: 11:41:00

ooh that reminds me - it's lunchtime and now I'm in the moods for buns - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-13: 12:10:00

oops I meant mood - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-13: 12:11:00

I'm thinking it would be out-of-line to make a comment about sticky buns, but the air conditioner isn't working in my office today. - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-13: 12:36:00

Such a tool would be perfect for hiding the fact that you're just bumming around instead of working your @$$ off. - ErWenn, 2007-06-13: 14:05:00

Some might say you should just turn the other cheek, jadenguy, but I'm behind you 100% if you want to get to the bottom of this problem. - ErWenn, 2007-06-13: 14:10:00

Rear end to the pun threads? Tush, tush. I've got a haunch we'll be back end the saddle tomorrow. Now, let me hit the can and we can all go grab a Heinie. Fanny that I should put it that way... I've been glute to my seat the hole day. Sorry, that last one was for posteriority. - Clayton, 2007-06-13: 14:34:00

OMG Clayton and ErWenn! Too fanny! - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-13: 14:45:00

I think we should put an ASSterisk beside this definition - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-13: 14:47:00

i'm sorry if I came off a little anal before, as i didn't mean to be so stern. but i just find puns comical garbage that we'll always keep with us, but like junk in the trunk of your car that you forget about for as long as possible, bodonkadonk on wood. - jadenguy, 2007-06-13: 16:59:00

LMAO!! - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-13: 17:46:00

petaj No butts about it, my friend laughed so hard it rectum! - petaj, 2007-06-14: 04:29:00

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Docuflage

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: DOCK-yew-flawj

Sentence: Harper fancied himself a very clever tactician, using an old empty attache case as docuflage, believing that coworkers were convinced that he was actually packing a large work schedule, though everyone in the office had been on to his scam for years.

Etymology: Blend of the words 'document' (various paperwork) and 'camouflage' (a device or stratagem used for concealment)

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Slothouflage

Created by: bigdog

Pronunciation: slawth-o-flazhe

Sentence: The piles of paper on my desk are all just slothouflage to stop the boss from seeing my pillow and scotch bottle.

Etymology: sloth (indolence) + camouflage (disguise)

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Fobject

Rhyme79

Created by: Rhyme79

Pronunciation: fob-jekt

Sentence: Shuffling papers whilst wearing my glasses on the end of my nose is the most effective combination of fobjects I have found. It creates the illusion that I'm actually doing what I'm paid to do.

Etymology: Fob -(as in 'fob off', deceive or dupe) + object = fobject

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COMMENTS:

Short and snappy - I could use this. :) - Discoveria, 2012-09-26: 12:14:00

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Phantofiles

Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: fan/tuh/files

Sentence: John had six different coloured sets of phantofiles he alternated at various times of the day to keep 'The Man' off his case and to demonstrate his industriousness and multitasking abilities. "Damn, he's good!" thought his boss. "He's completed three different projects today and it's only noon." John's phantofiles put him in line for a raise.

Etymology: phantom + files

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COMMENTS:

hmm - good ploy - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-13: 10:53:00

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Simulaborig

metrohumanx

Created by: metrohumanx

Pronunciation: SIM-uhl-AY-bore-ig

Sentence: The Bearded One entered with a brushed-aluminum clipboard under his arm, knowing it would cause a stir amongst the real workers. Every week he carried a new SIMULABORIG which gave the impression of semi-competence and enthusiasm which fooled no one. Last time it was a P.D.A. which made his productivity plummet faster than his dignity. His vain attempts to impress the boss ranged from a simple legal pad to a glowing little spaceship planted in his ear. Last year he attemped to SIMULABORIG a staff meeting but the only wireless hotspot was behind his sweaty forehead. The office joke was that he had a whole toybox full of SIMULABORIGS to shamelessly display at every opportunity. His manifolderol seemed to have no end. He would always carry some ubiquitool, unencumbered by any knowledge of its function. Particularly fond of pseudotechnocrap, he subscribed to every high-end gizmoid catalog available. Despite the appearance of The Bearded One's weekly McGuffen, his job performance brought new meaning to the word "adequate".

Etymology: SIMUlate+lABOr+RIG=SIMULABORIG_____ simulate: to give or assume the appearance or effect of... often with the intent to deceive--Latin "simulatus", past participle of "simulare"... to copy, represent, feign, from similis "like"_____ labor: expenditure of physical or mental effort especially when difficult or compulsory-Middle English, from Anglo-French labur, from Latin labor; perhaps akin to Latin labare to totter, labi to slip_____rig: to make or construct hastily or in a makeshift manner-Me riggen,prob of Scand.orig____variations: simulaborite, simulaborana, simulaborat, simulaborology etc.

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx http://isitchristmas.com/ - metrohumanx, 2008-08-06: 08:41:00

metrohumanx My name is MetrohumanX and I improve this message. - metrohumanx, 2008-08-06: 16:26:00

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Papershirk

Created by: Osomatic

Pronunciation: Rhymes with "paperwork."

Sentence: With enough important-looking documents, I can wander around for hours papershirking.

Etymology: Rhymes with "paperwork."

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Maskqueraid

Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: mask/ur/ade

Sentence: No one knew which department he worked in but with his maskqueraid of blackbery and wireless headset he easily passed his day wandering and betting on horses

Etymology: masquerade + mask + aid

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Officade

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: aw-fuh-sahd

Sentence: Stanley likes to make everybody think he is the most productive member of his team. He creates a smokescreen by creating an officade of papers and folders that practically obscure his window and keep prying eyes from seeing how little actual work he does.

Etymology: office (a room, set of rooms, or building where the business of a commercial or industrial organization or of a professional person is conducted) + facade (a superficial appearance or illusion of something)

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Smartphony

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: smärtfōnē

Sentence: Tom can always be seen with his smartphony in hand. It gives him the air of being up on current technology. He has never read an e-mail on it. He has never made or received a phone call. The truth is that he barely understands how to turn it on.

Etymology: smartphone (a mobile phone that incorporates a PDA) + phony (not genuine; fraudulent)

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-06-13: 00:01:00
The "S" in Timothy Johnson's GUST stands for Strategy. And strategy is key! Especially if you are trying to get way with doing nothing. Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram and Timothy! ~ James

Rebekah - 2009-11-05: 18:33:00
Protaskinate

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-01-07: 00:38:00
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James