Verboticism: Fileusion

'Why do you always carry that file folder?'

DEFINITION: n. A prop (e.g. papers, files or any non-functional equipment) used to create the illusion of busyness. v. To use office supplies to create the illusion that you are working.

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Fileusion

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Tomfilery

Created by: Wordotwist

Pronunciation: Tom fie la ree

Sentence: Zain was an expert at timefilery;always carrying about a load of files and walking rapidy when moving in front of the boss's window - to give the impression he was very busy.

Etymology: from tomfoolery

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Portfonio

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: pôrtˈfōnēˌō

Sentence: Gerry has all the correct business props, the pinstripe suit, the proper tie, the Blackberry. He is never seen without his portfolio. The truth; the suit is a cheap knock-off; the tie, a clip-on; Blackberry, a much too expensive cell phone and the portfolio, a portfonio that holds nothing more than his lunch.

Etymology: portfolio (a large, thin, flat case for loose sheets of paper such as drawings or maps) + phony (not genuine; fraudulent)

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Figmendation

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: fig men day shun

Sentence: As a long time civil servant in the federal Department of the Obscure and Forgotten Files, Roger was the King of the Toadies. He spent his entire workday carrying around a file folder which was labelled S.M.A.R.T. It looked very official and proved to the innocent bystander or visitor that Roger was a man with a special mission and purpose in his work. In fact the S.M.A.R.T. File was a figmendation. It usually contained a crossword puzzle or scratch & win cards, which Roger would spend his days at work playing. His co-workers thought that the S.M.A.R.T. stood for Segregated Modules Actualizing Relative Theory. In fact, the S.M.A.R.T. acronym actually stood for See Me Avoiding Real Toil. Yes, Roger was also known by his more popular nickname: The SmartFile Dodger!

Etymology: figment (a contrived or fantastic idea, i.e: a figment of the imagination) & mendacious (intentionally untrue;lying)

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx Did Riger work at the Texas Blog Suppository? Ya crack me up, Nose! - metrohumanx, 2008-08-06: 16:37:00

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Smartphony

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: smärtfōnē

Sentence: Tom can always be seen with his smartphony in hand. It gives him the air of being up on current technology. He has never read an e-mail on it. He has never made or received a phone call. The truth is that he barely understands how to turn it on.

Etymology: smartphone (a mobile phone that incorporates a PDA) + phony (not genuine; fraudulent)

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Phantofiles

Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: fan/toe/files

Sentence: Joe had six different coloured sets of phantofiles he alternated at various times of the day to keep 'The Man' off his case and to demonstrate his industriousness and multitasking abilities. "Damn, he's good!" thought his boss. "He's been working on six different projects today and it's only noon." Joe's phantofiles put him in line for a raise.

Etymology: PHANTOFILES - noun - from PHANTOM (an appearance, or illusion without material substance) + FILES (a container, or folder for keeping papers in order)

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COMMENTS:

I worked with a guy that did that...he got away with it until his new female boss figured him out and gave him the boot! - Nosila, 2008-08-06: 00:50:00

pesty female bosses! - scrabbelicious, 2008-08-06: 06:43:00

metrohumanx What datum lurks in the hearts of men?Only the Phantofile knows. - metrohumanx, 2008-08-06: 11:25:00

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Fileusion

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: fyl loo zhun

Sentence: He was the Great Pretender in our office. Sadly, because he was a male, he got away with it for way longer than any female would even dare try. Yes, Seymour Dolittle, was a fileusion. He would stalk the halls carrying a file folder and pretend to "do his rounds" with nothing more than what turned out to be a pizza place menu and and a bus schedule in his file folder. He fooled the senior management for over 5 years (the ladies in the company twigged on after a year or two, but had nowhere to lodge their concerns). When the cuts came, no one could salvage Seymour, as he worked for no one, did not report to anyone and could never successfully explain his presence in the hallowed halls. Luckily for him, he worked long enough to collect a great pension, unemployment insurance and a tasty severance for all his hard-worked time. Nice work if you can get it...and he wasn't even a CEO of anything!

Etymology: File (a set of related records (either written or electronic) kept together) & Illusion (an erroneous mental representation; the act of deluding; deception by creating illusory ideas; an illusory feat; considered magical by naive observers)

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Pendupe

sanssouci

Created by: sanssouci

Pronunciation: pen doop

Sentence: "I think I am going to pendupe for a while, I can't be botherd to do anymore work today but don't want Mr Stone to think I'm not pulling my weight in the office."

Etymology: pen - any of various instruments for writing or drawing with ink or a similar substance. A pen is a writing implement," c.1300, from O.Fr. penne "quill pen, feather," dupe - to make a dupe of; deceive; delude; trick. Dupe orriginates from 1680s, from Fr. dupe "deceived person," from M.Fr. duppe (early 15c.), thieves' jargon, probably from phrase de huppe "of the hoopoe," an extravagantly crested and reputedly stupid bird.

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Evidiligence

Created by: ErWenn

Pronunciation: /ˌɛvəˈdɪlədʒɛns/

Sentence: While folders and papers make excellent passive evidiligence for someone on the move, a mobile phone or PDA can serve the same purpose even when seated at one's desk, though such tools require an active effort to complete the effect of slackofflage.

Etymology: From evidence + diligence

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COMMENTS:

very on-message you evidiligently gave it a lot of thought. - galwaywegian, 2007-06-13: 07:03:00

Don't indilige him. - Clayton, 2007-06-13: 07:50:00

Actually, I didn't give it that much thought. I just borrowed some thoughts I'd had from when I created the previous verboticism "slackofflage." I've noticed that some of my highest-scoring words are ones I was least confident in (such as "mockliment.") Maybe there's a message there. Maybe I just give everything too much thought. Yeah, that seems more likely. - ErWenn, 2007-06-13: 14:02:00

now now ErWenn - you know what they say about making ASSumptions - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-13: 14:20:00

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Work-o-the-wisprop

Created by: ohwtepph

Pronunciation: wohrk-oh-thuh-wiz-prop

Sentence: Oh god, that Ben has been such a work-o-the-wispropper ever since he started out in the business of being the business supervisor. The work-o-the-wisprop he carried around were very convincing: papers to be signed, a neat brown folder and a clipboard with Transformers scribbles on it.

Etymology: will-o-the-wisp [illusion] + work + prop + wiz [the best at something e.g. a math wiz]

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COMMENTS:

good one! - pguse, 2007-06-13: 10:04:00

thanks. :D - ohwtepph, 2007-06-13: 10:28:00

It's a good one and I voted for you! - Stevenson0, 2007-06-13: 17:36:00

How did you get that punctuation in there? - mplsbohemian, 2007-06-13: 19:43:00

you can work all sorts of magic if you go into 'oops i want to change the spelling' bit of the edit section.... it makes things much more verbsatile - rikboyee, 2007-06-13: 22:23:00

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Excellusion

CharlieB

Created by: CharlieB

Pronunciation: ex-sell-usion

Sentence: You might think Bob is working hard on his spreadsheets. But they're not real. It's an excellusion.

Etymology: Excel (data spread sheets) + illusion (a false impression of reality)

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