Verboticisms

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: un siv ill ser vant

Sentence: Megan was definitely a most uncivilservant. She never allowed anything as insignificant as a customer to interrupt her busy day. She was in a deep phone conversation (the fourth today) with her best friend, Vanessa, who was on duty working in another store, two blocks away. Their brainy exchanges usually went "Well, he says,I don't know,like, what are you doing?" "And I go,like, I dunno" "And he says 'Whatever'". "Can you imagine? Like, as if." Megan carried on in this vein for like five or ten minutes, when a customer arrived at her till. The customer was getting impatient. Megan glowered at him and turned her back to continue her very important phone call. When the man started saying, "Excuse me", Megan reluctantly turned around and chewing gum loudly, with her phone jammed into her ear, gave him an impatient "What do you want?" gesture with hands and face. Too late she twigged he wore a balaclava and held a gun in one hand (pointed at her head)and a bag to collect the money he was going to rob from her till, in the other hand. "Oh-Ma-God", she thought, "My cell phone is dying..."

Etymology: uncivil(rude, impolite,lacking good manners) & servant (one who serves or provides a service) & civil servant for rhyming (a public official, member of the civil service)

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Created by: stache

Pronunciation: dĭ-sō'shē-ĭt

Sentence: After she made her way back to the electronics department, having to make her way past one dissociate after another who, apparently oblivious to her existence or that of any other customer, had no apparent function beyond taking up aisle space, the blue-smocked critters became scarce. When she finally found one and asked where she could find an adapter to use her ipod with her home stereo, the dull-eyed response was, "that's not my aisle, but if we have 'em they would definitely be in this half of the store."

Etymology: dissociate (-āt'), from the psychological defense mechanism dissociation, whereby an individual compartmentalizes certain thoughts, emotions, sensations, and/or memories; term coined by The French psychiatrist Pierre Janet, later expanded on in Jung's theories; associate (-ĭt), term used by a certain (world's largest)retailer as a euphamism for what passes as a sales staff.

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COMMENTS:

Like it! - pieceof314, 2008-05-13: 13:29:00

thanks, 314. first time I've tried to give a verbotomy to an existing word. - stache, 2008-05-13: 17:02:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: snub skrybe

Sentence: "It's no wonder people shoplift", Betty thought as she waited yet again at Customer Service to make a payment on her layaway. The cashier was going to snubscribe her again because he was too busy yakking on his cellphone on a social call. Fed up, she went to the Store Manager and told him loudly that the hardest part about shopping there was the fact that you had to wait endlessly for them to take your money. The Store Manager would have responded to her sooner, but he was too busy texting someone...

Etymology: Snub (refuse to acknowledge;ignore) & Subscribe (receive or obtain by regular payment;pay (an amount of money) as a contribution to a charity or service, especially at regular intervals)

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Created by: RockLoveChick

Pronunciation:

Sentence:

Etymology:

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Created by: didsbury

Pronunciation: mal-conn-ten-dant

Sentence: I am in a hurry but the staff in this shop are all such malcontendants there is no one who will serve me.

Etymology: Combination of malcontent and attendant. First used by Mark Twain to describe a particularly slovenly, family-run restaurant he visited in Mississippi. The restaurant gained notoriety and indeed some short lived success until it was forcibly closed by the owners who had a sense of humour failure when even physical abuse of the clientele wasn't enough to deter the hordes of malcontent-watchers.

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COMMENTS:

very nice - Jabberwocky, 2008-05-13: 15:40:00

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Created by: Tigger

Pronunciation: /pey-trun-EY-jent/

Sentence: Denise was a regular customer at Le Chic Boutique, but the new patronagent at the counter treated her as if she were some person off the street, and pointedly ignored her for several minutes while chitchatting with his coworker before snatching her credit card, and then slamming a pen and receipt down in front of her. She was infuriated at his rude behavior... yet strangely turned on, too.

Etymology: Patronage - a condescending manner or attitude in dealing with people; patronizing (from Old French, patroniser "power to give favors") + Agent - a representative of a business or firm (from Latin, agentum "one who acts or conducts action")

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Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: cla/sheer

Sentence: Most customer dissatisfaction is caused by confrontational clashiers who hate their jobs and looking for a fight.

Etymology: clash + cashier

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COMMENTS:

which begs the Clash question "Should I Stay or Should I Go?" - Jabberwocky, 2008-05-13: 13:10:00

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Created by: artr

Pronunciation: nahr-suh-sis-tuhnt

Sentence: Jane stopped to pick up a snack at the convenience store and found that the term was an oxymoron. The narcissistant was also some kind of moron. His mother must have told him he was the sun and that all the planets revolved around him. His attitude was like, "wait your turn Uranus".

Etymology: narcissist (a person who is overly self-involved, and often vain and selfish)+ assistant (a person who assists or gives aid and support; helper)

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Created by: rebelvin

Pronunciation: patron+neglect

Sentence: Patroneglect at the mall was almost bad enough to make me yearn for the steady but excruciatingly slow attention customers get at the Post Office.

Etymology: patron+neglect

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Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: cash-sheer-gall

Sentence: Brandon often displayed casheergall while working the counter at the convenience store and would continue on with personal chores while ignoring waiting customers.

Etymology: blend of cashier, sheer, and gall

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COMMENTS:

They must go to a special school... - Nosila, 2009-06-25: 11:19:00

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