Verboticism: Spitchat

DEFINITION: n., Forced small talk used by professional caregivers to put patients at ease. (Not usually effective.) v., To ask insipid questions while subjecting a person to an intimate, awkward or painful procedure.
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Spitchat
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Docquisition
Created by: zavijava
Pronunciation:
Sentence: After checking my chart, the gynocologist began the docquisition.
Etymology: doctor+inquisition
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COMMENTS:
Could almost be a tax audit. - petaj, 2007-10-16: 09:04:00
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Yogurtshove
Created by: greenplaideyes
Pronunciation:
Sentence: My crazy dentist never quits her yogurtshoving when she wants to distract me from her horrid adventures about my cavernous mouth.
Etymology: yogurt-oozy shove-it's being forced upon you
Chatation
Created by: Juny1
Pronunciation: chat-eh-tion
Sentence: The doctor enjoyed the chatation, being done to the paitent
Etymology:
Anesthymology
Created by: Mustang
Pronunciation: Uh-nes-thym-ology
Sentence: The dentist absentmindedly practiced anesthymology when he attempted to distract his patients while he worked.
Etymology: Anesthesia- ology
Communicache
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: kom myun i kayke
Sentence: Every time Eddy went to see his Dentist, Dr.Iva Payne, he had to endure their usual communicache exchange. She would communicate with him inane questions about the weather, politics and his family and he would endure the ache. He honestly did not know how she understood him, but after years of doing this, she could understand the answers of her victims, er patients.
Etymology: Communicate (transmit thoughts or feelings or information) & Ache (pain)
Jabwitter
Created by: TJayzz
Pronunciation: Jabb-wit-er
Sentence: Dr B. Kindly always resorted to the tried and tested method of jabwitter to put his patients at ease while injecting them. He would ask them trivial questions, such as, where they were going for their holiday or what they intended to have for lunch to distract their attention away from the pain. After twenty years in the profession he found this was the best tactic to use on most people.
Etymology: Jab(a hypodermic injection) + Witter(to speak about trivial matters) = Jabwitter
Distractigab
Created by: remistram
Pronunciation: di-strakt-ih-gab
Sentence: Part of medical training is a day of distractigab techniques, tips for safe topics and appropriate tone of voice. They generally pratice on squirrels and rats.
Etymology: distract + gab (yammer, chat)
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COMMENTS:
Love the word!!! So descriptive. - FayeWord, 2007-10-17: 17:47:00
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Stumblemumble
Created by: sarabriggs
Pronunciation: stum-ble-mum-ble
Sentence: this situation couldn't be any worse because you have at least twenty fingers in your mouth, including grinding power tools that cant touch your toungue. so talking in the back of your throat is all that can really go on. maybe you should become a ventriliquist and learn how to speak correctly without moving your lips. stumble and mumble over all the words you can get out you ventriliquist you.
Etymology:
Splatterpatter
Created by: galwaywegian
Pronunciation: sp latt ur patt ur
Sentence: She engaged in constant splatterpatter, interjecting euphemisms and repatree through the constant stream of gristle and gore
Etymology: patter, splatter
