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'This may hurt a little. So tell me, how are your kids?'

DEFINITION: n., Forced small talk used by professional caregivers to put patients at ease. (Not usually effective.) v., To ask insipid questions while subjecting a person to an intimate, awkward or painful procedure.

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Verboticisms

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Ineptpesk

Created by: 526630

Pronunciation: in-ept-pesk

Sentence: The dentist is always such an ineptpesk, talking to me while cleaning my teeth when he know i cant talk.

Etymology: inept-awkward pesky-annoying

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Dentachatter

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: dentachatər

Sentence: To avoid the dentachatter Ron would sometimes pretend to doze off. Even when he flinched the dentist allowed him to continue the ruse.

Etymology: dental (of or relating to the teeth) + chatter (talk rapidly or incessantly about trivial matters)

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Anestactic

Created by: simoneshin

Pronunciation: an-uhs-tak-tik

Sentence: boy, nurse hilda had some good anestactics while doctor bob gently severed my toe. she kept on talking about that blueberry-lime cheesecake...

Etymology: anesthesia + tactic

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COMMENTS:

mrskellyscl good one. - mrskellyscl, 2010-02-11: 10:38:00

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Docquisition

Created by: zavijava

Pronunciation:

Sentence: After checking my chart, the gynocologist began the docquisition.

Etymology: doctor+inquisition

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COMMENTS:

petaj Could almost be a tax audit. - petaj, 2007-10-16: 09:04:00

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Nitrousyakside

Created by: mplsbohemian

Pronunciation: nye-truhs-YAK-syed

Sentence: Little did the dentist know that Alex could counter her nitrousyakside by talking even longer and more boringly than she.

Etymology: nitrous oxide (administered at the beginning of dental work to ease pain) + yak + bedside manner

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Odilouge

Created by: e9b9t9

Pronunciation:

Sentence:

Etymology:

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Obligastory

Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: oh/blig/a/story

Sentence: Every six months I am muzzled and forced to listen to the dentist's obligastory about his three sons - almost as boring as his drill.

Etymology: obligatory + story

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Verbandagize

Created by: NeuroGlyph

Pronunciation:

Sentence:

Etymology:

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Healspiel

Created by: OZZIEBOB

Pronunciation: Heel-speel

Sentence: Until he met Dr Fang, Bob thought that Dr Payne's leechspeak was doctrivial. But after a few minutes with Fang, Bob soon realized that, despite all the healspiel, it hurts just as much to have a tooth extracted as it does to have one pulled.

Etymology: heal: to make better,well & spiel: plausible, glib talk; patter, line of gab. Doctrivial: blend of doctor, doctrine and trivial.

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COMMENTS:

Showoff, great job. - fourgirls, 2007-10-16: 09:59:00

how true - Jabberwocky, 2007-10-16: 12:27:00

nice blending - scrabbelicious, 2007-10-18: 07:44:00

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Qandaches

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: kew and ayks

Sentence: Dr. Yvonne is one multi-tasking dentist. She can mask up, get both fists in your mouth simultaneously, probe and scrape and poke and pull and all the while, ask what you thought about medical/political/societal and philosophical issues, while giving you the benefit of her own thoughts on each topic and understanding your feeble, numb, unintelligible answers. At the same time, she gives verbal notes to her dental assistant for your file, as she tells her what she needs next and calculates your bill and how much your insurance will pay for each treatment. Yes, she has QandAches down to a fine science. No wonder they call her Leader of the Plaque!

Etymology: Q and A (Questions and Answers)& Aches (a dull persistent (usually moderately intense) pain; be the source of pain;feel physical pain)

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-10-16: 00:01:00
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you again remistram! ~ James

OZZIEBOB - 2007-10-16: 05:32:00
Great definition and cartoon. Recently, I have had the need to attend a variety of medical professionals, and find that they engage in a fair bit of small talk. Dentists , by far, chatter and, also, seem to recommend the use of a wide range of products.

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-10-16: 17:54:00
Thanks Ozziebob! I too have been at the dentist and walked out not only with a sore tooth, but also with a sore ear. ~ James

lumina - 2008-09-11: 00:50:00
whynecology

lumina - 2008-09-11: 00:56:00
Sorry bout that...didn't meant to comment...hit wrong button.

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-02-11: 00:03:00
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James