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'This may hurt a little. So tell me, how are your kids?'

DEFINITION: n., Forced small talk used by professional caregivers to put patients at ease. (Not usually effective.) v., To ask insipid questions while subjecting a person to an intimate, awkward or painful procedure.

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Verboticisms

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Spitchat

mrskellyscl

Created by: mrskellyscl

Pronunciation: spit-chat

Sentence: Harold hated having to spitchat with the dentist when he had a mouth full of drool from novicaine and dental instruments jammed under his gums.

Etymology: wordplay on chitchat: an informal conversation

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Examoration

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: igzamôrāshən

Sentence: It was only being subjected to an examoration that William found out that Dr. Bob was a member of Toastmasters and due to deliver a speech that evening. Somehow he isn*t sure he is better off knowing everything he now knows about newts.

Etymology: examination (a detailed inspection or investigation) + oration (a formal speech, esp. one given on a ceremonial occasion)

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Shiberism

Created by: Jpwareham

Pronunciation: Shi/ber/ism

Sentence:

Etymology: Shi-random,berism- type of gibberous

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Obligastory

Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: oh/blig/a/story

Sentence: Every six months I am muzzled and forced to listen to the dentist's obligastory about his three sons - almost as boring as his drill.

Etymology: obligatory + story

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Mediblather

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: medi-blathər

Sentence: The treatment was bad enough. The mediblather was about to make him scream. The only thing that was mildly distracting him from the pain was the thought of choking the shallow life out of this jabbermonkey.

Etymology: medical (of or relating to the science of medicine, or to the treatment of illness and injuries) + blather (talk long-windedly without making very much sense)

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Therapalaver

karenanne

Created by: karenanne

Pronunciation: THAYR ah puh LAV er

Sentence: Believe it or not, the exercises for my burned hand weren't nearly as painful as the therapalaver I had to be subjected to during the treatments. At least talking about the record-setting snowfall in our area, how difficult it was to drive to the clinic, etc., gave me about two weeks off from listening to celebrity gossip....

Etymology: therapy + palaver (superfluous or idle talk)

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Proprattlaction

Created by: jmckays

Pronunciation: pro-prattl-aktion

Sentence: The doctor's proprattlaction proved ineffective as the scope slid into an intimate location no one but myself and my closest lovers had gone before...

Etymology: professional; prattle; distraction

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Vexferous

Created by: alyssatassi

Pronunciation: vex/fer /us

Sentence: He was the most Vexfurus dentist as he shoved the drill in my mouth

Etymology: vex comes from the word vexatatious which means troubling the nerves or peace of mins ferus comes from vociferous which means loud and insistent.

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Healspiel

Created by: OZZIEBOB

Pronunciation: Heel-speel

Sentence: Until he met Dr Fang, Bob thought that Dr Payne's leechspeak was doctrivial. But after a few minutes with Fang, Bob soon realized that, despite all the healspiel, it hurts just as much to have a tooth extracted as it does to have one pulled.

Etymology: heal: to make better,well & spiel: plausible, glib talk; patter, line of gab. Doctrivial: blend of doctor, doctrine and trivial.

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COMMENTS:

Showoff, great job. - fourgirls, 2007-10-16: 09:59:00

how true - Jabberwocky, 2007-10-16: 12:27:00

nice blending - scrabbelicious, 2007-10-18: 07:44:00

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Eloquesia

MrDave2176

Created by: MrDave2176

Pronunciation: ello-QWEE-shuh

Sentence: Dr. Lonnigan's eloquesia wasn't putting Harry at ease. In fact, his muttercal [filtered through medical apparatus] responses were painful to make and - to his ears - unintelligible.

Etymology: Eloqu(ence) + (anesth)esia EDIT: it occured to me that the word Queasy is sort of in there. I know I get a little queasy when the doctor starts talking to me.

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COMMENTS:

Will Doc Lonegan's eloquesia, cause Harry to have alopecia?! Great word. - OZZIEBOB, 2007-10-16: 23:02:00

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-10-16: 00:01:00
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you again remistram! ~ James

OZZIEBOB - 2007-10-16: 05:32:00
Great definition and cartoon. Recently, I have had the need to attend a variety of medical professionals, and find that they engage in a fair bit of small talk. Dentists , by far, chatter and, also, seem to recommend the use of a wide range of products.

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-10-16: 17:54:00
Thanks Ozziebob! I too have been at the dentist and walked out not only with a sore tooth, but also with a sore ear. ~ James

lumina - 2008-09-11: 00:50:00
whynecology

lumina - 2008-09-11: 00:56:00
Sorry bout that...didn't meant to comment...hit wrong button.

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-02-11: 00:03:00
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James