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'This may hurt a little. So tell me, how are your kids?'

DEFINITION: n., Forced small talk used by professional caregivers to put patients at ease. (Not usually effective.) v., To ask insipid questions while subjecting a person to an intimate, awkward or painful procedure.

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Verboticisms

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Anesthymology

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: Uh-nes-thym-ology

Sentence: The dentist absentmindedly practiced anesthymology when he attempted to distract his patients while he worked.

Etymology: Anesthesia- ology

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Qandaches

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: kew and ayks

Sentence: Dr. Yvonne is one multi-tasking dentist. She can mask up, get both fists in your mouth simultaneously, probe and scrape and poke and pull and all the while, ask what you thought about medical/political/societal and philosophical issues, while giving you the benefit of her own thoughts on each topic and understanding your feeble, numb, unintelligible answers. At the same time, she gives verbal notes to her dental assistant for your file, as she tells her what she needs next and calculates your bill and how much your insurance will pay for each treatment. Yes, she has QandAches down to a fine science. No wonder they call her Leader of the Plaque!

Etymology: Q and A (Questions and Answers)& Aches (a dull persistent (usually moderately intense) pain; be the source of pain;feel physical pain)

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Antiease

Created by: FayeWord

Pronunciation: an-ti-ease

Sentence: The obgyn's kind and gentle words before the examination were all antiease.

Etymology: Against feeling at ease.

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Drivelish

Created by: Boomertoo

Pronunciation:

Sentence: The dental staff's drivelish did not distract him from anxiously awaiting the procedure.

Etymology:

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Ompafone

Created by: BigKP

Pronunciation: Ew-mp-a-fone

Sentence: The doctor continued to make ompafone with me during the procedure.

Etymology: Ompa- funny little people fone- projection

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Jabberflossy

Created by: wordslikevenom

Pronunciation: Jab-ber-floss-ee

Sentence: The dental nurse yanked the tape from the spool and pulling it taut, sliced down into Dick's incisors, grinning as she sawed to-and-fro. He could taste the blood from his gums running down into the back of his mouth. "One, two! One, two! And through and through the vorpal floss went snicker-snack! She left him dead, and with his head she went galumphing back". As the jabberflossy flowed so did the puddle beneath Dick's seat ...

Etymology: Jabber - To talk rapidly, unintelligibly, or idly. Floss - dental floss

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Fluoridious

Created by: idavecook

Pronunciation:

Sentence:

Etymology:

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Afflictscussion

Created by: amandaprater

Pronunciation: uh-flixs-cuss-shun

Sentence: As the dentist poked around in the patients mouth, he asked the patient about his family. The afflictscussion was obvious as he tried to answer.

Etymology:

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Versadism

Created by: ngrzeda

Pronunciation: ver/sa/dism

Sentence: In between the doctor's incessant one-way conversation his smile could be seen all throughout Kyle's painful procedure; his versadism obvious to any onlooker.

Etymology: ver - verse sadism - delight in cruelty

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Therapalaver

karenanne

Created by: karenanne

Pronunciation: THAYR ah puh LAV er

Sentence: Believe it or not, the exercises for my burned hand weren't nearly as painful as the therapalaver I had to be subjected to during the treatments. At least talking about the record-setting snowfall in our area, how difficult it was to drive to the clinic, etc., gave me about two weeks off from listening to celebrity gossip....

Etymology: therapy + palaver (superfluous or idle talk)

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-10-16: 00:01:00
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you again remistram! ~ James

OZZIEBOB - 2007-10-16: 05:32:00
Great definition and cartoon. Recently, I have had the need to attend a variety of medical professionals, and find that they engage in a fair bit of small talk. Dentists , by far, chatter and, also, seem to recommend the use of a wide range of products.

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-10-16: 17:54:00
Thanks Ozziebob! I too have been at the dentist and walked out not only with a sore tooth, but also with a sore ear. ~ James

lumina - 2008-09-11: 00:50:00
whynecology

lumina - 2008-09-11: 00:56:00
Sorry bout that...didn't meant to comment...hit wrong button.

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-02-11: 00:03:00
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James