Verboticism: Autocommunifrustratilooplooploop

DEFINITION: v. To call a phone "help line" and spend 45 minutes pushing buttons and screaming at dumb voice-recognition system, before being automatically disconnected. n. A push-button or voice-activated phone menu system designed to irritate those who use it.
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Autocommunifrustratilooplooploop
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Digigeridoo
Created by: Stevenson0
Pronunciation: dij/i/uh-ree-doo
Sentence: Whenever I phone Bell Canada, our national phone company for service, I always encounter the digigeridoo system, which encompasses pressing hundreds of buttons which only produces unintelligible irritating voice activated drone sounds and than a very clear "Thank you for calling Bell".
Etymology: digit + didgeridoo (a musical instrument of Australian Aborigines that creates a low drone sound)
Screamcouragment
Created by: bdraffen0002
Pronunciation: /skrēmˈkərijmənt/
Sentence: I was foaming at the mouth; their menu was absolute screamcouragement.
Etymology: From the words Scream: Middle English: origin uncertain; perhaps from Middle Dutch. And Encouragement: Middle English (formerly also as incourage ): from French encourager, from en- ‘in’ + corage ‘courage.’
Presstwosterloop
Created by: diyan627
Pronunciation: press two ster loop
Sentence: Tina spent an hour and forty-five minutes on the most insane, frustrating presstwosterloop scam her cell phone company is putting customers through. After explaining her situation to 7 representatives, they still owed her $350 for the "promotional phone" she got 4 months ago. The presstwosterloop didn't stop her ... She finally hung up and drove down to the store where she raised a ruckus until the manager got her problem taken care of. Or so he said.
Etymology: Press two (ah, the options!) + ster (one that is associated with, participates, does) + loop (circular action)
Illedigitimate
Created by: stache
Pronunciation: ĭl'ĭ-dĭ-jĭt'ə-mĭt
Sentence: The illedigitemate "help" menu Bjorn reached when he called AT&T was all but helpful. After wearing a blister on his button finger and being irritated to the point of requiring three double gin-and-tonics he hung up and found the answer he needed in the help menu on his cell phone.
Etymology: meld of 'illegitimate' and 'digit' (finger)/'digital.'
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COMMENTS:
fun to say - Jabberwocky, 2008-04-14: 16:21:00
Uuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhm. Three double gin-and-tonics . . . I can almost taste the lime on my stirring digit. - doseydotes, 2008-04-14: 16:35:00
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Pressbuttirritant
Created by: dochanne
Pronunciation: Press-butt-ear-it-ant
Sentence: David just wanted to talk to someone about how he felt, but no matter what he did he couldn't get through to a human and kept getting lost in the voice-menu options. Before long he was no longer suicidal but was instead homicidal. He cursed and swore - "Damned presbuttirritant!" but in the end the mental health helpline hung up on him when he pressed the two instead of the two twice.
Etymology: Press button - usually what you're told to do by a pressbuttirritant; Irritant - grrrr! Presbyterian - a conveniently named religion, used here because some religions insist their followers press your (door) buttons in the early hours on the weekends and are thus also irritating. Not necessarily the Presbyterians themselves you understand.
Autocommunifrustratilooplooploop
Created by: CanadianAndyCapp
Pronunciation: Or-tow-kom-U-ni-fruss-tray-tee-loop-loop-loop (with the final three loops said in an increasingly aggitated, high, strangulated manner)
Sentence: (Taken from a speech by General Ludd)...."...Tecno-phobes and Luddites unite! you have only the shackles of your automated communications and information data retrieval systems to lose. We have been tricked into believing that these "new and improved" technologies were developed to improve our lives. Not So! they are the subvertive systems by which we are brainwashed into surrendering our individual creative and social capabilities to the mind-numbing and straitjacket methods of the computerised system we are trying to use. For proof we need look no further than the omnipresent office automatic phone systems and their cunningly devised autocommunifrustratilooplooploop tortures. Arise, rebels of the future and reclaim your sanity and souls!!!!..." This message is recorded for public information. Please press one to repeat this message, Two for information on how to...........looplooploop
Etymology: Auto - Automatic (Constantly breaking down) / Communi - Communication (totally without intelligent substance) / Frustrati - Frustration (The Human condition) / Looplooploop (Go back to the beginning and start again-again-again)
