Vote for the best verboticism.
DEFINITION: n. A non-threatening term to describe the procedure of cutting vocal cords on yappy dogs, which makes it sound like a good thing -- after all, they will never bark again. v. To remove the vocal chords.
Verboticisms
Click on each verboticism to read the sentences created by the Verbotomy writers, and to see your voting options...
You have two votes. Click on the words to read the details, then vote your favorite.
Vocaleskapi
Created by: ninjakane
Pronunciation: Vo-cal-esk-a-pea
Sentence: This dog needs a vocaleskapi stat!
Etymology: Australian
Larynicks
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: lari nix
Sentence: Fred had a smart, but yappy dog called Larry. So when Fred wanted to talk in front of Larry, he used pig-latin (or as he called it dog-latin). Fred told his wife he was taking Larry in the ar-cay to the eterinarian-vay, to ix-nay his larynicks and to have him eutered-nay. Poor Larry, after the operation, he lost his mojo and couldn''t tell anyone about it!
Etymology: Larynx (a cartilaginous structure at the top of the trachea; contains elastic vocal cords that are the source of the vocal tone in speech) & Nicks (cuts;cut slightly, with a razor)
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COMMENTS:
rebarkable - galwaywegian, 2011-01-18: 10:15:00
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Petpax
Created by: Stevenson0
Pronunciation: pet/pax
Sentence: Annoying pet-speak disturbing your home life? Welcome to the 21st century puppy-love solution!! Petpax, the new non-invasive (to you the owner) surgery, guarantees to reduce pet chatter by 95%. Pets will be silently happy the way they were meant to be. (WARNING: may attract intruders and wet spots on the carpet - no assembly necessary)
Etymology: pet + pax (peace)
Puppyhush
Created by: ErWenn
Pronunciation: /'p&-pE-"h&sh/
Sentence: I hope that the Puppyhush(TM) procedure is only an urban legend because it'd be a pretty sick solution if it existed.
Etymology: From puppy + hush, reminiscent of "hush puppy."
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COMMENTS:
I take it you're not in favour of this procedure... - wordmeister, 2007-01-30: 01:34:00
Sounds pretty dreadful to me. I am in favor of fixing the annoying little buggers so that they don't breed, however. - ErWenn, 2007-01-30: 08:53:00
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Debarkle
Created by: rikboyee
Pronunciation: dee-bar-kul
Sentence: Ever since the debarkle he's been much quieter...but for some reason he won't stop crapping on my pillow..
Etymology: bark, debacle... and in a non-threatening way it sounds a bit like sparkle....don't ya think
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COMMENTS:
oh yes. This works. - erasmus, 2007-01-30: 04:14:00
Just on the basis of your sentence, you get my vote today. - chofu67, 2007-01-30: 12:48:00
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Bartunist
Created by: adbern
Pronunciation: bar-tu-nist
Sentence: That dog barkes ugly, it need fast a bartunist
Etymology: bar from bark, tu =tune, ist from install= barktune install
Goldenize
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: gōldənīz
Sentence: When Ron saw an ad from his vet offering to goldenize his dog he was intrigued. Control his dog’s barking? That sounded great. When he found out that it involved cutting the vocal cords he was stunned.
Etymology: golden (very favorable) + ize (suffix forming verbs) because ”silence is golden”
Shushpuppy
Created by: chofu67
Pronunciation: shush/pup/pee
Sentence: Shushpuppy is a humane procedure that will enable your dog to accompany you anywhere without being a nuisance - he would thank you for it (if he could)
Etymology: shush (to silence)+ hushpuppy
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COMMENTS:
Sorry Jabberwocky, I did not realize that after my entry triggered a "Join shushpuppy group" I would be listed for the same submittal you had already entered. I expected to be able to try to enter another word. - chofu67, 2007-01-30: 11:11:00
no problem chofus67 - We probably thought of it at the same time - I wonder if that means we can vote for each other... - Jabberwocky, 2007-01-30: 11:21:00
Hey Chofu67 and Jabberwocky, Great minds think alike! Nevertheless, I was thinking of removing the "join group" function. What do you think? - Verbotomy, 2007-01-30: 11:35:00
It's fine with me either way - from Chofu67's comment, it sounds as if it was accidental anyway. It may happen though that a group decides to put in a word together and would appreciate the option - Jabberwocky, 2007-01-30: 12:05:00
Now that I know what "join group" means, I probably won't use that function again, so it could stay or go. - chofu67, 2007-01-30: 12:44:00
Looks like you guys had roughly the same idea I did. - ErWenn, 2007-01-30: 20:58:00
I think it was the picture - it reminded me of the old hush puppy commercials - Jabberwocky, 2007-01-31: 08:42:00
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Yippeesiotomy
Created by: Osomatic
Pronunciation: yip-eeze-ee-ought-uh-me
Sentence: I'm paying for my neighbor's dog to get a yippeesiotomy, I figure it's worth it just to get some sleep.
Etymology: yip + yippee + episiotomy
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COMMENTS:
I know it's not exactly non-threatening, but I couldn't resist! - Osomatic, 2007-01-30: 01:31:00
It's great! The "yipi" part makes it sound very positive. - wordmeister, 2007-01-30: 01:33:00
Thanks, wordmeister! I almost spelled it "yippeesiotomy." In fact, maybe I still should... - Osomatic, 2007-01-30: 01:38:00
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Goldend
Created by: Buzzardbilly
Pronunciation: ˈgōl-dənd
Sentence: The vet goldend our dog, so we didn't get any warning barks when the burglars were coming.
Etymology: If silence is golden and you make something silent, wouldn't it be golden? Since the silence brings an end to the noise, wouldn't the procudure to rid the noisemaker of its noise-making abilities be a "gold end"? So, splicing "golden" and "end" makes "goldend."
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COMMENTS:
I have to add that the vet I used to work for refused to do the "de-barking" procedure (as they do call it) because the dogs still made noise and wore themselves out trying to bark. So, while my word fits the definition given, the procedure and its outcomes are at odds with the notion. - Buzzardbilly, 2009-08-31: 10:55:00
If it's cruel to "de-bark" a tree, how do our Canine-Americans feel about the procedure? - metrohumanx, 2009-09-01: 11:10:00
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Comments:
wordmeister - 2007-01-30: 12:00:00
Wow! Lot's of funny words today!
wordmeister - 2007-01-30: 12:19:00
Hey, I'm winning! Ooops, I'm the only player in this group...
Discoveria - 2007-01-30: 15:28:00
Some rather 'surgical' ones too...
wordmeister - 2007-01-30: 17:09:00
Yes, I suppose we have a lot of doctors who are contributing...
This happened to a dog in our neighborhood. The kids call him "Horace."
Nosila - 2009-08-31: 13:21:00
My friend's spaniel had his tail cut...so he's now called Bob!
artr2 - 2012-06-08: 06:42:00
Didn't play this round because I couldn't find the humor in this cruel, self-centered practice. ArtR2