Vote for the best verboticism.
DEFINITION: n. A non-threatening term to describe the procedure of cutting vocal cords on yappy dogs, which makes it sound like a good thing -- after all, they will never bark again. v. To remove the vocal chords.
Verboticisms
Click on each verboticism to read the sentences created by the Verbotomy writers, and to see your voting options...
You have two votes. Click on the words to read the details, then vote your favorite.
Yiposuction
Created by: erasmus
Pronunciation: yip o suck shon
Sentence: Terry the terrier had yiposuction to stop him singing along to phil collins tracks and cracking the panes in next doors greenhouse
Etymology: from yip as in yip yap dog noises and suction, like liposuction.
Woofediting
Created by: mweinmann
Pronunciation: wuf - edet - ting
Sentence: Sparky was excited to go for woofediting. He thought it meant that he would emerge with a smooth, silky voice that would fit with his image....as a "Dog About Town".
Etymology: woof, editing
Disemhowl
Created by: toadstool57
Pronunciation: dis-em-howl
Sentence: Spot started studying sign language after hearing his master tell the vet Spot need to be disemhowled.
Etymology: disembowel/howl
Bartunist
Created by: adbern
Pronunciation: bar-tu-nist
Sentence: That dog barkes ugly, it need fast a bartunist
Etymology: bar from bark, tu =tune, ist from install= barktune install
Yapectomy
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: yap ek tomee
Sentence: See Spot run. See Spot bark. Se Spot bark once too often, at anything. See Dick & Jane take Spot to Doctor Pepper for a yapectomy. See Spot run again. No see Spot bark again. See Dick & Jane get no more noise infraction tickets!
Etymology: Yap (yelp, bark) & Ectomy (removal, surgical excision of a part)
Petpax
Created by: Stevenson0
Pronunciation: pet/pax
Sentence: Annoying pet-speak disturbing your home life? Welcome to the 21st century puppy-love solution!! Petpax, the new non-invasive (to you the owner) surgery, guarantees to reduce pet chatter by 95%. Pets will be silently happy the way they were meant to be. (WARNING: may attract intruders and wet spots on the carpet - no assembly necessary)
Etymology: pet + pax (peace)
Goldend
Created by: Buzzardbilly
Pronunciation: ˈgōl-dənd
Sentence: The vet goldend our dog, so we didn't get any warning barks when the burglars were coming.
Etymology: If silence is golden and you make something silent, wouldn't it be golden? Since the silence brings an end to the noise, wouldn't the procudure to rid the noisemaker of its noise-making abilities be a "gold end"? So, splicing "golden" and "end" makes "goldend."
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COMMENTS:
I have to add that the vet I used to work for refused to do the "de-barking" procedure (as they do call it) because the dogs still made noise and wore themselves out trying to bark. So, while my word fits the definition given, the procedure and its outcomes are at odds with the notion. - Buzzardbilly, 2009-08-31: 10:55:00
If it's cruel to "de-bark" a tree, how do our Canine-Americans feel about the procedure? - metrohumanx, 2009-09-01: 11:10:00
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Voxtration
Created by: johnnyrockett
Pronunciation: Va-ks-tray-shion
Sentence: I took Fido to the vet so he could voxtrate him. He hasn't said a word since.
Etymology: Vox - Latin for voice traiton - as in castration
Marceauing
Created by: maxxy
Pronunciation: mar-SEW-ing
Sentence: Fluffy was a little hesitant -- he remembered how he he had thought "neutering" meant he'd get his own private fetch instructor -- but, still, the prospect of being marceaued just sounded so elegant.
Etymology: From Marcel Marceau, world-famous mime
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COMMENTS:
Clever! - wordmeister, 2007-01-30: 11:38:00
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Kittifying
Created by: allwise
Pronunciation: kit-i-fy-ing
Sentence: -"Hey little doggie, it's time to get you kittified!, yes it is," (cuddle, cuddle) "who's daddy's little cutie?!" (more cuddle cuddle)
Etymology: kittify - to make more catlike and cute
Comments:
wordmeister - 2007-01-30: 12:00:00
Wow! Lot's of funny words today!
wordmeister - 2007-01-30: 12:19:00
Hey, I'm winning! Ooops, I'm the only player in this group...
Discoveria - 2007-01-30: 15:28:00
Some rather 'surgical' ones too...
wordmeister - 2007-01-30: 17:09:00
Yes, I suppose we have a lot of doctors who are contributing...
This happened to a dog in our neighborhood. The kids call him "Horace."
Nosila - 2009-08-31: 13:21:00
My friend's spaniel had his tail cut...so he's now called Bob!
artr2 - 2012-06-08: 06:42:00
Didn't play this round because I couldn't find the humor in this cruel, self-centered practice. ArtR2