Vote for the best verboticism.

'I'm getting my vocal cords tuned!'

DEFINITION: n. A non-threatening term to describe the procedure of cutting vocal cords on yappy dogs, which makes it sound like a good thing -- after all, they will never bark again. v. To remove the vocal chords.

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Verboticisms

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Goldend

Created by: Buzzardbilly

Pronunciation: ˈgōl-dənd

Sentence: The vet goldend our dog, so we didn't get any warning barks when the burglars were coming.

Etymology: If silence is golden and you make something silent, wouldn't it be golden? Since the silence brings an end to the noise, wouldn't the procudure to rid the noisemaker of its noise-making abilities be a "gold end"? So, splicing "golden" and "end" makes "goldend."

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COMMENTS:

I have to add that the vet I used to work for refused to do the "de-barking" procedure (as they do call it) because the dogs still made noise and wore themselves out trying to bark. So, while my word fits the definition given, the procedure and its outcomes are at odds with the notion. - Buzzardbilly, 2009-08-31: 10:55:00

metrohumanx If it's cruel to "de-bark" a tree, how do our Canine-Americans feel about the procedure? - metrohumanx, 2009-09-01: 11:10:00

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Barkless

Created by: josje

Pronunciation: barkless

Sentence: doing this it leaves your dog barkless

Etymology: barking and less

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Disembarking

Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation:

Sentence: shep is much quieter sinc being disembarked, but every now and then he gets a rather worrying look on his face...

Etymology:

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COMMENTS:

very funny!! - Jabberwocky, 2007-01-31: 12:32:00

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Yapotomy

CharlieB

Created by: CharlieB

Pronunciation: yap-o-tə-mi

Sentence: After a week of mournful looks and silence from Fido, Mrs Smythe strongly suspected her neighbour had kidnapped the poor pooch in the night and performed a yapotomy.

Etymology: yap (of a small dog – to bark constantly) + -tomy (surgical incision)

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COMMENTS:

rough - galwaywegian, 2011-01-18: 10:14:00

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Vooting

Created by: lilty4422

Pronunciation: voo-tang

Sentence: mY DOGS KEPT BARKING SO I STARTED VOTTING THIER THEM TO SHUT THEM UP!!

Etymology:

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Yapendectomy

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: yap pen dek toe mee

Sentence: Fifi was so excited. She loved going in the car with her "Mommy". A car ride meant a run in the off-leash park or a free dog cone from Dairy Queen. Today Mommy had told her she was going to get a yapendectomy...she was so excited she barked all the way there. When they pulled up to the building, Fifi realized it was the same place where her brother Rover had gone when he had gotten tutored!

Etymology: Yap (bark in a high-pitched tone)& Appendectomy (surgical removal of the vermiform appendix)

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COMMENTS:

artr Great, now my kid won\'t go to his tutor! - artr, 2009-08-31: 06:33:00

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Woofsterectomy

Created by: Bulletchewer

Pronunciation: wuff-ster-rect-o-mee

Sentence: Every dog has his day, and today, neighbourhood nuisance Rover was having a woofsterectomy.

Etymology: From "woof" meaning (dunno, don't speak dog)and "hysterectomy" meaning bye bye baby, baby goodbye....

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Woofediting

Created by: mweinmann

Pronunciation: wuf - edet - ting

Sentence: Sparky was excited to go for woofediting. He thought it meant that he would emerge with a smooth, silky voice that would fit with his image....as a "Dog About Town".

Etymology: woof, editing

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Barkliptoyapatall

metrohumanx

Created by: metrohumanx

Pronunciation: bar-CLIP-too-YAPP-at-all

Sentence: Tom had his cat de-clawed, his bird's wings clipped, his stallion gelded and his wife's feet bound. A legendary humanitarian, he had his beloved pooch submit to a painless BARKLIPTOYAPATALL operation in lieu of puncturing his own eardrumas with a shish-kabob skewer.

Etymology: bark+ clip+ to+ yap+ at+ all :)

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COMMENTS:

Welcome back, metro...it's been ruff, ruff without you! - Nosila, 2009-08-31: 13:19:00

metrohumanx Merci! - metrohumanx, 2009-09-01: 11:08:00

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Peticure

Created by: wordmeister

Pronunciation: pet-E-kUr

Sentence: Joan and Roger thought that their home would be a lot quieter once they gave Rover a peticure. And it was for a while... Unfortunately their daughter was quite upset, and out of sympathy for Rover refused to speak, answering all questions with a loud bark!

Etymology: pet+pedicure

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Comments:

wordmeister - 2007-01-30: 12:00:00
Wow! Lot's of funny words today!

wordmeister - 2007-01-30: 12:19:00
Hey, I'm winning! Ooops, I'm the only player in this group...

Discoveria - 2007-01-30: 15:28:00
Some rather 'surgical' ones too...

wordmeister - 2007-01-30: 17:09:00
Yes, I suppose we have a lot of doctors who are contributing...

mrskellyscl mrskellyscl - 2009-08-31: 08:07:00
This happened to a dog in our neighborhood. The kids call him "Horace."

Nosila - 2009-08-31: 13:21:00
My friend's spaniel had his tail cut...so he's now called Bob!

artr2 - 2012-06-08: 06:42:00
Didn't play this round because I couldn't find the humor in this cruel, self-centered practice. ArtR2