Vote for the best verboticism.
DEFINITION: n. A non-threatening term to describe the procedure of cutting vocal cords on yappy dogs, which makes it sound like a good thing -- after all, they will never bark again. v. To remove the vocal chords.
Verboticisms
Click on each verboticism to read the sentences created by the Verbotomy writers, and to see your voting options...
You have two votes. Click on the words to read the details, then vote your favorite.
Goldend
Created by: Buzzardbilly
Pronunciation: ˈgōl-dənd
Sentence: The vet goldend our dog, so we didn't get any warning barks when the burglars were coming.
Etymology: If silence is golden and you make something silent, wouldn't it be golden? Since the silence brings an end to the noise, wouldn't the procudure to rid the noisemaker of its noise-making abilities be a "gold end"? So, splicing "golden" and "end" makes "goldend."
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COMMENTS:
I have to add that the vet I used to work for refused to do the "de-barking" procedure (as they do call it) because the dogs still made noise and wore themselves out trying to bark. So, while my word fits the definition given, the procedure and its outcomes are at odds with the notion. - Buzzardbilly, 2009-08-31: 10:55:00
If it's cruel to "de-bark" a tree, how do our Canine-Americans feel about the procedure? - metrohumanx, 2009-09-01: 11:10:00
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Yelphelp
Created by: quippingqueen
Pronunciation: yelp/help
Sentence: The yodelling vet enthusiastically trilled on about how the yelphelp procedure was really quite simple - yank the yapping muscle once and for all.
Etymology: yelp + help
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COMMENTS:
Yonderful! - wordmeister, 2007-01-30: 12:39:00
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Dogcilise
Created by: Discoveria
Pronunciation: Dorg-sill-lies
Sentence: Are you tired of hearing that ceaseless yapping? Do you constantly wear earplugs? Then why not dogcilise young Rover? Swift and painless dogcilising facilities only at Golden Silences Vet Practice.
Etymology: Dog + docile: docile meaning quiet, meek. Also suggests 'sterilise'.
Yappytahappy
Created by: ekath
Pronunciation: yappy-tuh-happy
Sentence: After Fluffy's yappytahappy, the neighbors brought me homemade cookies
Etymology: yappy to happy
Peticure
Created by: wordmeister
Pronunciation: pet-E-kUr
Sentence: Joan and Roger thought that their home would be a lot quieter once they gave Rover a peticure. And it was for a while... Unfortunately their daughter was quite upset, and out of sympathy for Rover refused to speak, answering all questions with a loud bark!
Etymology: pet+pedicure
Disembowow
Created by: galwaywegian
Pronunciation: diss em bou ou
Sentence: when barkley was disembowowed he felt like disembarking from the ship of life
Etymology: disembowel bow ow
Muttmute
Created by: sodium
Pronunciation: mutt-myoot
Sentence: Because she kept scaring the neighbor kids, Ursula was taken to the vet to undergo a muttmute.
Etymology: mutt + mute
Puppyhush
Created by: ErWenn
Pronunciation: /'p&-pE-"h&sh/
Sentence: I hope that the Puppyhush(TM) procedure is only an urban legend because it'd be a pretty sick solution if it existed.
Etymology: From puppy + hush, reminiscent of "hush puppy."
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COMMENTS:
I take it you're not in favour of this procedure... - wordmeister, 2007-01-30: 01:34:00
Sounds pretty dreadful to me. I am in favor of fixing the annoying little buggers so that they don't breed, however. - ErWenn, 2007-01-30: 08:53:00
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Marceauing
Created by: maxxy
Pronunciation: mar-SEW-ing
Sentence: Fluffy was a little hesitant -- he remembered how he he had thought "neutering" meant he'd get his own private fetch instructor -- but, still, the prospect of being marceaued just sounded so elegant.
Etymology: From Marcel Marceau, world-famous mime
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COMMENTS:
Clever! - wordmeister, 2007-01-30: 11:38:00
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Barkmuffle
Created by: jedijawa
Pronunciation: bark-muff-el
Sentence: Fido had a barkmuffle performed so he won't have to worry about barking anymore.
Etymology: bark + muffle
Comments:
wordmeister - 2007-01-30: 12:00:00
Wow! Lot's of funny words today!
wordmeister - 2007-01-30: 12:19:00
Hey, I'm winning! Ooops, I'm the only player in this group...
Discoveria - 2007-01-30: 15:28:00
Some rather 'surgical' ones too...
wordmeister - 2007-01-30: 17:09:00
Yes, I suppose we have a lot of doctors who are contributing...
This happened to a dog in our neighborhood. The kids call him "Horace."
Nosila - 2009-08-31: 13:21:00
My friend's spaniel had his tail cut...so he's now called Bob!
artr2 - 2012-06-08: 06:42:00
Didn't play this round because I couldn't find the humor in this cruel, self-centered practice. ArtR2