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'I'm getting my vocal cords tuned!'

DEFINITION: n. A non-threatening term to describe the procedure of cutting vocal cords on yappy dogs, which makes it sound like a good thing -- after all, they will never bark again. v. To remove the vocal chords.

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Verboticisms

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Yapotomy

CharlieB

Created by: CharlieB

Pronunciation: yap-o-tə-mi

Sentence: After a week of mournful looks and silence from Fido, Mrs Smythe strongly suspected her neighbour had kidnapped the poor pooch in the night and performed a yapotomy.

Etymology: yap (of a small dog – to bark constantly) + -tomy (surgical incision)

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COMMENTS:

rough - galwaywegian, 2011-01-18: 10:14:00

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Barkmuffle

Created by: jedijawa

Pronunciation: bark-muff-el

Sentence: Fido had a barkmuffle performed so he won't have to worry about barking anymore.

Etymology: bark + muffle

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Petpax

Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: pet/pax

Sentence: Annoying pet-speak disturbing your home life? Welcome to the 21st century puppy-love solution!! Petpax, the new non-invasive (to you the owner) surgery, guarantees to reduce pet chatter by 95%. Pets will be silently happy the way they were meant to be. (WARNING: may attract intruders and wet spots on the carpet - no assembly necessary)

Etymology: pet + pax (peace)

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Frogmentation

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: frôgmentāshən

Sentence: When anybody asked, Rudy told people that had undergone a vocal frogmentation. He felt that it sounded less extreme and less selfish then having the vocal cords of his yappy little dog cut.

Etymology: Frog [in the throat] (Temporary hoarseness caused by phlegm in the back of the throat) + augmentation (improvement)

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Snuffulated

Created by: paperhoard

Pronunciation: snuff-you-late

Sentence: After Sparky was vocally snuffulated I started yelling at the gerbil for squealing every time I touched the potato chip bag.

Etymology: Derived from the word SNUFF, to put a sudden end to.

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COMMENTS:

erasmus so cute though. - erasmus, 2007-01-30: 10:04:00

erasmus so cute though. This gets my vote but voting appears to be broken. - erasmus, 2007-01-30: 10:05:00

Thanks! - paperhoard, 2007-01-30: 11:50:00

also sounds like suffocated... Cute and scary! - wordmeister, 2007-01-30: 14:54:00

Oops - forgot about the "non-threatening" aspect of the word. The dog won't understand anyway! - paperhoard, 2007-01-30: 14:56:00

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Camime

Created by: purpleartichokes

Pronunciation: KAY-mime

Sentence: Rover's yapping at the lint that had collected in Bob's navel was the deciding factor in him ultimately getting camimed.

Etymology: canine, mime (as in a mute actor)

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COMMENTS:

Much smarter and more original than "shushpuppy". Good stuff! - Bulletchewer, 2007-01-30: 19:37:00

Thank you Bulletchewer! - purpleartichokes, 2007-01-31: 04:11:00

I tried and tried to think of a word with mime - good work - Jabberwocky, 2007-01-31: 09:16:00

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Yappytahappy

Created by: ekath

Pronunciation: yappy-tuh-happy

Sentence: After Fluffy's yappytahappy, the neighbors brought me homemade cookies

Etymology: yappy to happy

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Yiposuction

erasmus

Created by: erasmus

Pronunciation: yip o suck shon

Sentence: Terry the terrier had yiposuction to stop him singing along to phil collins tracks and cracking the panes in next doors greenhouse

Etymology: from yip as in yip yap dog noises and suction, like liposuction.

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Woofsterectomy

Created by: Bulletchewer

Pronunciation: wuff-ster-rect-o-mee

Sentence: Every dog has his day, and today, neighbourhood nuisance Rover was having a woofsterectomy.

Etymology: From "woof" meaning (dunno, don't speak dog)and "hysterectomy" meaning bye bye baby, baby goodbye....

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Kittifying

Created by: allwise

Pronunciation: kit-i-fy-ing

Sentence: -"Hey little doggie, it's time to get you kittified!, yes it is," (cuddle, cuddle) "who's daddy's little cutie?!" (more cuddle cuddle)

Etymology: kittify - to make more catlike and cute

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Comments:

wordmeister - 2007-01-30: 12:00:00
Wow! Lot's of funny words today!

wordmeister - 2007-01-30: 12:19:00
Hey, I'm winning! Ooops, I'm the only player in this group...

Discoveria - 2007-01-30: 15:28:00
Some rather 'surgical' ones too...

wordmeister - 2007-01-30: 17:09:00
Yes, I suppose we have a lot of doctors who are contributing...

mrskellyscl mrskellyscl - 2009-08-31: 08:07:00
This happened to a dog in our neighborhood. The kids call him "Horace."

Nosila - 2009-08-31: 13:21:00
My friend's spaniel had his tail cut...so he's now called Bob!

artr2 - 2012-06-08: 06:42:00
Didn't play this round because I couldn't find the humor in this cruel, self-centered practice. ArtR2