Vote for the best verboticism.
DEFINITION: n. A non-threatening term to describe the procedure of cutting vocal cords on yappy dogs, which makes it sound like a good thing -- after all, they will never bark again. v. To remove the vocal chords.
Verboticisms
Click on each verboticism to read the sentences created by the Verbotomy writers, and to see your voting options...
You have two votes. Click on the words to read the details, then vote your favorite.
Yippeesiotomy
Created by: Osomatic
Pronunciation: yip-eeze-ee-ought-uh-me
Sentence: I'm paying for my neighbor's dog to get a yippeesiotomy, I figure it's worth it just to get some sleep.
Etymology: yip + yippee + episiotomy
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COMMENTS:
I know it's not exactly non-threatening, but I couldn't resist! - Osomatic, 2007-01-30: 01:31:00
It's great! The "yipi" part makes it sound very positive. - wordmeister, 2007-01-30: 01:33:00
Thanks, wordmeister! I almost spelled it "yippeesiotomy." In fact, maybe I still should... - Osomatic, 2007-01-30: 01:38:00
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Dogcilise
Created by: Discoveria
Pronunciation: Dorg-sill-lies
Sentence: Are you tired of hearing that ceaseless yapping? Do you constantly wear earplugs? Then why not dogcilise young Rover? Swift and painless dogcilising facilities only at Golden Silences Vet Practice.
Etymology: Dog + docile: docile meaning quiet, meek. Also suggests 'sterilise'.
Puppyhush
Created by: ErWenn
Pronunciation: /'p&-pE-"h&sh/
Sentence: I hope that the Puppyhush(TM) procedure is only an urban legend because it'd be a pretty sick solution if it existed.
Etymology: From puppy + hush, reminiscent of "hush puppy."
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COMMENTS:
I take it you're not in favour of this procedure... - wordmeister, 2007-01-30: 01:34:00
Sounds pretty dreadful to me. I am in favor of fixing the annoying little buggers so that they don't breed, however. - ErWenn, 2007-01-30: 08:53:00
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Petpax
Created by: Stevenson0
Pronunciation: pet/pax
Sentence: Annoying pet-speak disturbing your home life? Welcome to the 21st century puppy-love solution!! Petpax, the new non-invasive (to you the owner) surgery, guarantees to reduce pet chatter by 95%. Pets will be silently happy the way they were meant to be. (WARNING: may attract intruders and wet spots on the carpet - no assembly necessary)
Etymology: pet + pax (peace)
Yapectomy
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: yap ek tomee
Sentence: See Spot run. See Spot bark. Se Spot bark once too often, at anything. See Dick & Jane take Spot to Doctor Pepper for a yapectomy. See Spot run again. No see Spot bark again. See Dick & Jane get no more noise infraction tickets!
Etymology: Yap (yelp, bark) & Ectomy (removal, surgical excision of a part)
Euphemutem
Created by: whimsy
Pronunciation:
Sentence: The euphemutem the vet used for the procedure calmed him down, at least for the couple of moments before the vet returned with various sharp instruments.
Etymology: euphemism + mute + them (mute'em)
Yapendectomy
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: yap pen dek toe mee
Sentence: Fifi was so excited. She loved going in the car with her "Mommy". A car ride meant a run in the off-leash park or a free dog cone from Dairy Queen. Today Mommy had told her she was going to get a yapendectomy...she was so excited she barked all the way there. When they pulled up to the building, Fifi realized it was the same place where her brother Rover had gone when he had gotten tutored!
Etymology: Yap (bark in a high-pitched tone)& Appendectomy (surgical removal of the vermiform appendix)
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COMMENTS:
Great, now my kid won\'t go to his tutor! - artr, 2009-08-31: 06:33:00
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Softenbark
Created by: petaj
Pronunciation: soff-n-bach
Sentence: Fideaux the puppy's awful barking would clash with his owner's piano practice. So he was off to the vet to softenbark.
Etymology: soften (make quieter) + bark (dog noise) + offenbach (musical composer)
Vooting
Created by: lilty4422
Pronunciation: voo-tang
Sentence: mY DOGS KEPT BARKING SO I STARTED VOTTING THIER THEM TO SHUT THEM UP!!
Etymology:
Voxtration
Created by: johnnyrockett
Pronunciation: Va-ks-tray-shion
Sentence: I took Fido to the vet so he could voxtrate him. He hasn't said a word since.
Etymology: Vox - Latin for voice traiton - as in castration
Comments:
wordmeister - 2007-01-30: 12:00:00
Wow! Lot's of funny words today!
wordmeister - 2007-01-30: 12:19:00
Hey, I'm winning! Ooops, I'm the only player in this group...
Discoveria - 2007-01-30: 15:28:00
Some rather 'surgical' ones too...
wordmeister - 2007-01-30: 17:09:00
Yes, I suppose we have a lot of doctors who are contributing...
This happened to a dog in our neighborhood. The kids call him "Horace."
Nosila - 2009-08-31: 13:21:00
My friend's spaniel had his tail cut...so he's now called Bob!
artr2 - 2012-06-08: 06:42:00
Didn't play this round because I couldn't find the humor in this cruel, self-centered practice. ArtR2