Vote for the best verboticism.
DEFINITION: n. A non-threatening term to describe the procedure of cutting vocal cords on yappy dogs, which makes it sound like a good thing -- after all, they will never bark again. v. To remove the vocal chords.
Verboticisms
Click on each verboticism to read the sentences created by the Verbotomy writers, and to see your voting options...
You have two votes. Click on the words to read the details, then vote your favorite.
Goldend
Created by: Buzzardbilly
Pronunciation: ˈgōl-dənd
Sentence: The vet goldend our dog, so we didn't get any warning barks when the burglars were coming.
Etymology: If silence is golden and you make something silent, wouldn't it be golden? Since the silence brings an end to the noise, wouldn't the procudure to rid the noisemaker of its noise-making abilities be a "gold end"? So, splicing "golden" and "end" makes "goldend."
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COMMENTS:
I have to add that the vet I used to work for refused to do the "de-barking" procedure (as they do call it) because the dogs still made noise and wore themselves out trying to bark. So, while my word fits the definition given, the procedure and its outcomes are at odds with the notion. - Buzzardbilly, 2009-08-31: 10:55:00
If it's cruel to "de-bark" a tree, how do our Canine-Americans feel about the procedure? - metrohumanx, 2009-09-01: 11:10:00
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Kittifying
Created by: allwise
Pronunciation: kit-i-fy-ing
Sentence: -"Hey little doggie, it's time to get you kittified!, yes it is," (cuddle, cuddle) "who's daddy's little cutie?!" (more cuddle cuddle)
Etymology: kittify - to make more catlike and cute
Yappysnappy
Created by: Javeson1
Pronunciation: yap-pee-snap-pee
Sentence: In my opinion, almost every little dog deserves to undergo yappysnappy and give my nerves a rest....just for a while.....
Etymology: yappy (dogs) + snappy (cords)
Euphemutem
Created by: whimsy
Pronunciation:
Sentence: The euphemutem the vet used for the procedure calmed him down, at least for the couple of moments before the vet returned with various sharp instruments.
Etymology: euphemism + mute + them (mute'em)
Woofsterectomy
Created by: Bulletchewer
Pronunciation: wuff-ster-rect-o-mee
Sentence: Every dog has his day, and today, neighbourhood nuisance Rover was having a woofsterectomy.
Etymology: From "woof" meaning (dunno, don't speak dog)and "hysterectomy" meaning bye bye baby, baby goodbye....
Yapectomy
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: yap ek tomee
Sentence: See Spot run. See Spot bark. Se Spot bark once too often, at anything. See Dick & Jane take Spot to Doctor Pepper for a yapectomy. See Spot run again. No see Spot bark again. See Dick & Jane get no more noise infraction tickets!
Etymology: Yap (yelp, bark) & Ectomy (removal, surgical excision of a part)
Frogmentation
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: frôgmentāshən
Sentence: When anybody asked, Rudy told people that had undergone a vocal frogmentation. He felt that it sounded less extreme and less selfish then having the vocal cords of his yappy little dog cut.
Etymology: Frog [in the throat] (Temporary hoarseness caused by phlegm in the back of the throat) + augmentation (improvement)
Barchotomy
Created by: Mustang
Pronunciation: bar-KOT-uh-mee
Sentence: After many sleepless nights and calls from angry neighbors Harriet took her pooch Herbie to the vet for a barchotomy which solved her problem but left Herbie perplexed at his wispering bark.
Etymology: Combination of bark (the abrupt, harsh, explosive cry of a dog) and dichotomy (from the Greek dichotomia (divided): dich- (form of dícha , in two, asunder); tomia- a combining form meaning cutting, incision, excision of an object)
Puppyhush
Created by: ErWenn
Pronunciation: /'p&-pE-"h&sh/
Sentence: I hope that the Puppyhush(TM) procedure is only an urban legend because it'd be a pretty sick solution if it existed.
Etymology: From puppy + hush, reminiscent of "hush puppy."
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COMMENTS:
I take it you're not in favour of this procedure... - wordmeister, 2007-01-30: 01:34:00
Sounds pretty dreadful to me. I am in favor of fixing the annoying little buggers so that they don't breed, however. - ErWenn, 2007-01-30: 08:53:00
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Bartunist
Created by: adbern
Pronunciation: bar-tu-nist
Sentence: That dog barkes ugly, it need fast a bartunist
Etymology: bar from bark, tu =tune, ist from install= barktune install
Comments:
wordmeister - 2007-01-30: 12:00:00
Wow! Lot's of funny words today!
wordmeister - 2007-01-30: 12:19:00
Hey, I'm winning! Ooops, I'm the only player in this group...
Discoveria - 2007-01-30: 15:28:00
Some rather 'surgical' ones too...
wordmeister - 2007-01-30: 17:09:00
Yes, I suppose we have a lot of doctors who are contributing...
This happened to a dog in our neighborhood. The kids call him "Horace."
Nosila - 2009-08-31: 13:21:00
My friend's spaniel had his tail cut...so he's now called Bob!
artr2 - 2012-06-08: 06:42:00
Didn't play this round because I couldn't find the humor in this cruel, self-centered practice. ArtR2