Vote for the best verboticism.
DEFINITION: n. A non-threatening term to describe the procedure of cutting vocal cords on yappy dogs, which makes it sound like a good thing -- after all, they will never bark again. v. To remove the vocal chords.
Verboticisms
Click on each verboticism to read the sentences created by the Verbotomy writers, and to see your voting options...
You have two votes. Click on the words to read the details, then vote your favorite.
Goldenize
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: gōldənīz
Sentence: When Ron saw an ad from his vet offering to goldenize his dog he was intrigued. Control his dog’s barking? That sounded great. When he found out that it involved cutting the vocal cords he was stunned.
Etymology: golden (very favorable) + ize (suffix forming verbs) because ”silence is golden”
Puppyhush
Created by: ErWenn
Pronunciation: /'p&-pE-"h&sh/
Sentence: I hope that the Puppyhush(TM) procedure is only an urban legend because it'd be a pretty sick solution if it existed.
Etymology: From puppy + hush, reminiscent of "hush puppy."
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COMMENTS:
I take it you're not in favour of this procedure... - wordmeister, 2007-01-30: 01:34:00
Sounds pretty dreadful to me. I am in favor of fixing the annoying little buggers so that they don't breed, however. - ErWenn, 2007-01-30: 08:53:00
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Barchotomy
Created by: Mustang
Pronunciation: bar-KOT-uh-mee
Sentence: After many sleepless nights and calls from angry neighbors Harriet took her pooch Herbie to the vet for a barchotomy which solved her problem but left Herbie perplexed at his wispering bark.
Etymology: Combination of bark (the abrupt, harsh, explosive cry of a dog) and dichotomy (from the Greek dichotomia (divided): dich- (form of dícha , in two, asunder); tomia- a combining form meaning cutting, incision, excision of an object)
Disemhowl
Created by: toadstool57
Pronunciation: dis-em-howl
Sentence: Spot started studying sign language after hearing his master tell the vet Spot need to be disemhowled.
Etymology: disembowel/howl
Peticure
Created by: wordmeister
Pronunciation: pet-E-kUr
Sentence: Joan and Roger thought that their home would be a lot quieter once they gave Rover a peticure. And it was for a while... Unfortunately their daughter was quite upset, and out of sympathy for Rover refused to speak, answering all questions with a loud bark!
Etymology: pet+pedicure
Shutupredure
Created by: pandafever
Pronunciation: shut-up-preedur
Sentence: Thanks to Yoda's shutupredure, Elaine is no longer going to be evicted.
Etymology:
Goldend
Created by: Buzzardbilly
Pronunciation: ˈgōl-dənd
Sentence: The vet goldend our dog, so we didn't get any warning barks when the burglars were coming.
Etymology: If silence is golden and you make something silent, wouldn't it be golden? Since the silence brings an end to the noise, wouldn't the procudure to rid the noisemaker of its noise-making abilities be a "gold end"? So, splicing "golden" and "end" makes "goldend."
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COMMENTS:
I have to add that the vet I used to work for refused to do the "de-barking" procedure (as they do call it) because the dogs still made noise and wore themselves out trying to bark. So, while my word fits the definition given, the procedure and its outcomes are at odds with the notion. - Buzzardbilly, 2009-08-31: 10:55:00
If it's cruel to "de-bark" a tree, how do our Canine-Americans feel about the procedure? - metrohumanx, 2009-09-01: 11:10:00
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Disembarking
Created by: galwaywegian
Pronunciation:
Sentence: shep is much quieter sinc being disembarked, but every now and then he gets a rather worrying look on his face...
Etymology:
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COMMENTS:
very funny!! - Jabberwocky, 2007-01-31: 12:32:00
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Vocaleskapi
Created by: ninjakane
Pronunciation: Vo-cal-esk-a-pea
Sentence: This dog needs a vocaleskapi stat!
Etymology: Australian
Unchordinate
Created by: jonzerofourteen
Pronunciation: un kord in ayt
Sentence: Puddles, next door, was a quiet dog since the operation. Jeff secretly wished somebody would unchordinate its owner in a similar manner.
Etymology: un (to negate) + chord (as in vocal chord) + ate (to cause or to act upon)
Comments:
wordmeister - 2007-01-30: 12:00:00
Wow! Lot's of funny words today!
wordmeister - 2007-01-30: 12:19:00
Hey, I'm winning! Ooops, I'm the only player in this group...
Discoveria - 2007-01-30: 15:28:00
Some rather 'surgical' ones too...
wordmeister - 2007-01-30: 17:09:00
Yes, I suppose we have a lot of doctors who are contributing...
This happened to a dog in our neighborhood. The kids call him "Horace."
Nosila - 2009-08-31: 13:21:00
My friend's spaniel had his tail cut...so he's now called Bob!
artr2 - 2012-06-08: 06:42:00
Didn't play this round because I couldn't find the humor in this cruel, self-centered practice. ArtR2