Vote for the best verboticism.
DEFINITION: n. A non-threatening term to describe the procedure of cutting vocal cords on yappy dogs, which makes it sound like a good thing -- after all, they will never bark again. v. To remove the vocal chords.
Verboticisms
Click on each verboticism to read the sentences created by the Verbotomy writers, and to see your voting options...
You have two votes. Click on the words to read the details, then vote your favorite.
Dogcilise
Created by: Discoveria
Pronunciation: Dorg-sill-lies
Sentence: Are you tired of hearing that ceaseless yapping? Do you constantly wear earplugs? Then why not dogcilise young Rover? Swift and painless dogcilising facilities only at Golden Silences Vet Practice.
Etymology: Dog + docile: docile meaning quiet, meek. Also suggests 'sterilise'.
Disemhowl
Created by: toadstool57
Pronunciation: dis-em-howl
Sentence: Spot started studying sign language after hearing his master tell the vet Spot need to be disemhowled.
Etymology: disembowel/howl
Petpax
Created by: Stevenson0
Pronunciation: pet/pax
Sentence: Annoying pet-speak disturbing your home life? Welcome to the 21st century puppy-love solution!! Petpax, the new non-invasive (to you the owner) surgery, guarantees to reduce pet chatter by 95%. Pets will be silently happy the way they were meant to be. (WARNING: may attract intruders and wet spots on the carpet - no assembly necessary)
Etymology: pet + pax (peace)
Yipectomy
Created by: ahwinters
Pronunciation: yip - eck - toe - me
Sentence: Fido was significantly less annoying after his yipectomy.
Etymology: Yip (sound) + ectomy (to cut out)
Voxtration
Created by: johnnyrockett
Pronunciation: Va-ks-tray-shion
Sentence: I took Fido to the vet so he could voxtrate him. He hasn't said a word since.
Etymology: Vox - Latin for voice traiton - as in castration
Woofsterectomy
Created by: Bulletchewer
Pronunciation: wuff-ster-rect-o-mee
Sentence: Every dog has his day, and today, neighbourhood nuisance Rover was having a woofsterectomy.
Etymology: From "woof" meaning (dunno, don't speak dog)and "hysterectomy" meaning bye bye baby, baby goodbye....
Disembowow
Created by: galwaywegian
Pronunciation: diss em bou ou
Sentence: when barkley was disembowowed he felt like disembarking from the ship of life
Etymology: disembowel bow ow
Barchotomy
Created by: Mustang
Pronunciation: bar-KOT-uh-mee
Sentence: After many sleepless nights and calls from angry neighbors Harriet took her pooch Herbie to the vet for a barchotomy which solved her problem but left Herbie perplexed at his wispering bark.
Etymology: Combination of bark (the abrupt, harsh, explosive cry of a dog) and dichotomy (from the Greek dichotomia (divided): dich- (form of dícha , in two, asunder); tomia- a combining form meaning cutting, incision, excision of an object)
Goldend
Created by: Buzzardbilly
Pronunciation: ˈgōl-dənd
Sentence: The vet goldend our dog, so we didn't get any warning barks when the burglars were coming.
Etymology: If silence is golden and you make something silent, wouldn't it be golden? Since the silence brings an end to the noise, wouldn't the procudure to rid the noisemaker of its noise-making abilities be a "gold end"? So, splicing "golden" and "end" makes "goldend."
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COMMENTS:
I have to add that the vet I used to work for refused to do the "de-barking" procedure (as they do call it) because the dogs still made noise and wore themselves out trying to bark. So, while my word fits the definition given, the procedure and its outcomes are at odds with the notion. - Buzzardbilly, 2009-08-31: 10:55:00
If it's cruel to "de-bark" a tree, how do our Canine-Americans feel about the procedure? - metrohumanx, 2009-09-01: 11:10:00
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Barkectomy
Created by: BMott
Pronunciation: bark-ek-to-me
Sentence: We took Yappi for a barkectomy after the neighbors complained about how noisy he was.
Etymology: Bark - The noise a dog makes. Ectomy - Removal of.
Comments:
wordmeister - 2007-01-30: 12:00:00
Wow! Lot's of funny words today!
wordmeister - 2007-01-30: 12:19:00
Hey, I'm winning! Ooops, I'm the only player in this group...
Discoveria - 2007-01-30: 15:28:00
Some rather 'surgical' ones too...
wordmeister - 2007-01-30: 17:09:00
Yes, I suppose we have a lot of doctors who are contributing...
This happened to a dog in our neighborhood. The kids call him "Horace."
Nosila - 2009-08-31: 13:21:00
My friend's spaniel had his tail cut...so he's now called Bob!
artr2 - 2012-06-08: 06:42:00
Didn't play this round because I couldn't find the humor in this cruel, self-centered practice. ArtR2