Vote for the best verboticism.

'We have securitized the lavatory entrance systems'

DEFINITION: v. To demonstrate your superior knowledge and intellect by using complex, confusing and mind-numbingly stupid jargon. n. A person who uses big words to inflate their unusually small ideas.

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Verboticisms

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Blusterblather

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: bləstərbleðər

Sentence: After years as a spokesperson for the utility company, Jill is so versed in blusterblather that she has trouble understanding her own twaddle.

Etymology: bluster (talk in a loud, aggressive, or indignant way with little effect) + blather (talk long-windedly without making very much sense)

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Normcrosbeing

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: norm croz bee ing

Sentence: Norma Crosby was the quintessential Normcrosbeing in our office. She thought by using big words (that she had seen in print, but apparently failed to check the definitions of), people would think she was far more educated than the Grade 10 level she had actually achieved, barely. When she had transferred into our HR Office, she felt it obliged her to speak far above the intellect of our internal clients, even if it meant inventing her own words. The clients were often left shaken and confused when she spoke in large words that had nothing to do with the topic at hand. As a result, people avoided her like the plague and chose not to believe any facts that she presented. Her personal crusade was that unless words were at least eight or ten letters long, why bother to use them?? It would be redumbdant and wasterly and youtilize no hexpediant deliverables.

Etymology: Norm Crosby - (Comedian, considered the Master of the Malaprop, who uses the wrong words, usually big ones to make confusing, funny comments.(i.e he speaks from his diagram and drinks decapitated coffee) & Being (a creature, a living person)

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx I swear we must have worked in the same place in a prior lifetime. - metrohumanx, 2008-12-31: 00:55:00

You are probably right...in "The Office"! And now you know why it is a hit! - Nosila, 2008-12-31: 23:11:00

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Patteronise

Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: pat err owe n aye z

Sentence: She constantly patteronised Patty, despite doubts being brought forward about the verissimilitude of her verbosity.

Etymology: patronise, patter.

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Lexiconflated

Created by: mweinmann

Pronunciation: lex - e - con - flated

Sentence: If Myron lexiconflated his phraseology when he attended board meetings by projecting the intersection of gross margin conceptions with total net calculated sales, his wordabsurd permutations of numbers often left those in attendance scratching their heads but unable to comment for fear of appearing unable to comprehend simple concepts.

Etymology: Lexicon (vocabulary: a language user's knowledge of words) + inflated (enlarged beyond truth or reasonableness)

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Patroisnize

Created by: bookowl

Pronunciation: pa/traw/nize

Sentence: Please don't patroisnize me - I don't have my PHD in linguistics.

Etymology: patronize + patios

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COMMENTS:

Whew! Strong creation! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-06: 11:29:00

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Snobblahblahing

Aardvark

Created by: Aardvark

Pronunciation: Snaw BLAH BLAH ing

Sentence: Bill was always trying to impress the boss. In almost every meeting he was snobblahblahing his way through his presentation.

Etymology: Snob = believing oneself to be superior, Blah = useless talk (repeated).

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COMMENTS:

Nifty! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-06: 21:40:00

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Baloony

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: baloōnē

Sentence: The missives that descended from the corporate office were so much balloony that it was a wonder they didn't just float away.

Etymology: Balloon (a large bag filled with hot air or gas to make it rise in the air) + Loony (a crazy or silly person) Also Baloney (foolish or deceptive talk)

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COMMENTS:

I wonder if ya could make a baloony sammich out of that stuff? - Mustang, 2008-12-31: 23:53:00

Great combination. - OZZIEBOB, 2009-01-01: 00:00:00

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Jargontificate

Created by: Tigger

Pronunciation: /jahr-gon-TIF-i-keyt/

Sentence: All of Ken's employees and co-workers wondered how he had gotten his job, as an Information Technology Manager, since he was practically computer-illiterate and he could barely turn a computer on without help. He was a charismatic talker though, so even though he went around using inappropriate techno-terms and unrelated buzzwords, and he would jargontificate endlessly, he only sounded convincing to other computer-illiterate people. Then he mentioned his background as a Car Salesman, and it all started to make sense.

Etymology: Jargon - language characterized pretentious vocabulary and convoluted syntax, often vague in meaning (from Old French, gargon "a chattering" [of birds]) + Pontificate - to speak in a pompous or dogmatic manner (from Latin, pontifex "bridge-maker")

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COMMENTS:

Great last line in your sentence! Well selected etymology. Good word! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-06: 10:55:00

So many good submissions today picking was tough. But this one's a peach, so I picked it. - stache, 2008-03-06: 15:13:00

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Verbiagedimwiting

Created by: abrakadeborah

Pronunciation: Vir-be-ag-dim-wit-ing

Sentence: Nancy Noesnutting was always posting notes all over the office using her verbiagedimwiting skills.

Etymology: Verbiage - speech or writing that uses too many words or excessively technical expressions. Dimwit - A stupid person

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Dicktionary

karenanne

Created by: karenanne

Pronunciation: DIK shun air ee

Sentence: Arry Gant is such a dicktionary. He likes to use fancy words to obscure the true meaning of what he is really saying, while making it sound really important. Everything he says is technically true; it just comes off sounding a lot better than what really happened. For example, he told us yesterday that he went to an evening philosophy lecture on campus last Thursday, probably because he thought it would impress this really cute girl who hangs out with us a lot. I was getting tired of his B.S., so I called his bluff in front of her and asked him to tell us some things about it. He responded, "Well, it was so esoteric and arcane as to be virtually impenetrable. I only wish it had could have been less rarefied and more prosaic." The girl, whose intelligence he had vastly underestimated, responded, "So what you're saying is that the lecture was meant mainly for people who already have knowledge of the study of philosophy, and so you didn't understand anything the speakers were saying because you probably haven't taken any classes in it. You wish it had been way more simplified so you could have actually understood some of it. Is that right?" All he could say in response was, "Uhhhh...yeah, that's basically it," before slinking away, claiming that he had to "go do something very urgent and important."

Etymology: dick + dictionary

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COMMENTS:

Good word and story...Arry'd make a great dicktator! - Nosila, 2010-05-17: 17:11:00

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2008-03-06: 00:01:00
Today's definition was suggested by Nosila. Thank you Nosila. ~ James

purpleartichokes - 2008-03-06: 21:11:00
Love the 'toon today James. I think my boss is considering installing one on our bathroom doors, complete with an age-appropriate timer, which leaves me wondering when I'm gonna get a chance to pluck my eyebrows.

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2008-03-07: 06:05:00
Thanks Purple, Is there a personal purpose code for plucking your eyebrows? ~ James

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-05-17: 00:00:00
Today's definition was suggested by Nosila. Thank you Nosila. ~ James