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'We have securitized the lavatory entrance systems'

DEFINITION: v. To demonstrate your superior knowledge and intellect by using complex, confusing and mind-numbingly stupid jargon. n. A person who uses big words to inflate their unusually small ideas.

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Verboticisms

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Normcrosbeing

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: norm croz bee ing

Sentence: Norma Crosby was the quintessential Normcrosbeing in our office. She thought by using big words (that she had seen in print, but apparently failed to check the definitions of), people would think she was far more educated than the Grade 10 level she had actually achieved, barely. When she had transferred into our HR Office, she felt it obliged her to speak far above the intellect of our internal clients, even if it meant inventing her own words. The clients were often left shaken and confused when she spoke in large words that had nothing to do with the topic at hand. As a result, people avoided her like the plague and chose not to believe any facts that she presented. Her personal crusade was that unless words were at least eight or ten letters long, why bother to use them?? It would be redumbdant and wasterly and youtilize no hexpediant deliverables.

Etymology: Norm Crosby - (Comedian, considered the Master of the Malaprop, who uses the wrong words, usually big ones to make confusing, funny comments.(i.e he speaks from his diagram and drinks decapitated coffee) & Being (a creature, a living person)

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx I swear we must have worked in the same place in a prior lifetime. - metrohumanx, 2008-12-31: 00:55:00

You are probably right...in "The Office"! And now you know why it is a hit! - Nosila, 2008-12-31: 23:11:00

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Jargontificate

Created by: Tigger

Pronunciation: /jahr-gon-TIF-i-keyt/

Sentence: All of Ken's employees and co-workers wondered how he had gotten his job, as an Information Technology Manager, since he was practically computer-illiterate and he could barely turn a computer on without help. He was a charismatic talker though, so even though he went around using inappropriate techno-terms and unrelated buzzwords, and he would jargontificate endlessly, he only sounded convincing to other computer-illiterate people. Then he mentioned his background as a Car Salesman, and it all started to make sense.

Etymology: Jargon - language characterized pretentious vocabulary and convoluted syntax, often vague in meaning (from Old French, gargon "a chattering" [of birds]) + Pontificate - to speak in a pompous or dogmatic manner (from Latin, pontifex "bridge-maker")

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COMMENTS:

Great last line in your sentence! Well selected etymology. Good word! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-06: 10:55:00

So many good submissions today picking was tough. But this one's a peach, so I picked it. - stache, 2008-03-06: 15:13:00

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Patroisnize

Created by: bookowl

Pronunciation: pa/traw/nize

Sentence: Please don't patroisnize me - I don't have my PHD in linguistics.

Etymology: patronize + patios

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COMMENTS:

Whew! Strong creation! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-06: 11:29:00

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Verbiagedimwiting

Created by: abrakadeborah

Pronunciation: Vir-be-ag-dim-wit-ing

Sentence: Nancy Noesnutting was always posting notes all over the office using her verbiagedimwiting skills.

Etymology: Verbiage - speech or writing that uses too many words or excessively technical expressions. Dimwit - A stupid person

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Malaproporter

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: mal a prop por ter

Sentence: When Christine was in charge of giving instructions, she was a malaproporter. Her big, convaluting words and writing, often left the office staff with confusing instructions. When she ran for the office of Safety and Evacuation Officer, she was voted out, due to her unclear and head-spinning guidance!

Etymology: Malapropism (A malapropism is the production of an incorrect word in place of a word with a similar sound, resulting in a nonsensical, often humorous utterance & Purporter (the intended meaning of a communication have the often specious appearance of being, intending, or claiming)

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Blahsay

Created by: toadstool57

Pronunciation: bla-zay

Sentence: Jill's constant yakking in her hypnotic, dull voice is so blahsay she put the entire office to sleep at the meeting.

Etymology: blase'/say

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COMMENTS:

Different angle! Your verbote is a clever homonym! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-06: 11:09:00

Excellent - Mustang, 2008-03-06: 17:34:00

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Bossify

Created by: Eanrael

Pronunciation: Boss i fie

Sentence: HR knew that the new commission plan would cut the worker's income by at least 1/3 if not 1/2; they would have to *bossify* the presentation. Note: With the connotation that a "boss" would be happy with either result a) people ignore the plan because the wording is too complicated or b)they believe the plan to be benificial.

Etymology: Boss - n. - slang - Good, Excellent, Cool Boss - n. - a person who is in charge of an employee or organization — ORIGIN Dutch baas ‘master’.

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Gobbledygush

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: GOB-uhl-dee-gush

Sentence: Samantha had a smattering of technical knowledge regarding electronic, photographic and surveillance systems but she had a vast vocabulary and would ramble on with enthusiastic gobbledegush not realizing that most folks knew she was talking nonsense.

Etymology: Blend of 'gobbledygook' (language characterized by circumlocution and jargon, usually hard to understand) and 'gush' (to express oneself extravagantly or emotionally; talk effusively)

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Cruzely

Created by: DiPpO

Pronunciation: croe-ze-lie

Sentence: Most politicians are cruzelying most of the time, ofcourse there are exceptions. Bush, for instance is harly a "cruzeleur"..

Etymology: The first known proffessional cruzeleur (fr.) was called Kroezelekoen. Wich is African for "hairy chest". His style of speeking made his people name him "the great Cruzeleur". Later English tourists picked up the word and spread it around the world..

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COMMENTS:

Extraordinary! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-06: 11:28:00

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Inflatulate

Created by: Jamagra

Pronunciation: in/flach/u/late

Sentence: Joe dithered outside the bathroom door. The access instructions distributed at the 3 hour "securitized lavatory entrance system" meeting had seemed very clear at the time: choose #1 or choose #2. But, Joe now wondered, what about an employee requiring #1 AND #2? Had there been a third option? Why, oh why, had he not paid more attention to the inflatulated memo??? Joe shuffled off to find an HR rep who could help him with this rather pressing problem.

Etymology: inflate + flatulate

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COMMENTS:

spot on, Jam. - stache, 2008-03-06: 08:53:00

Nice blend. Could be used to describe what's done in the bathroom too! - Tigger, 2008-03-06: 10:11:00

Certainly has a special fl-air !!! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-06: 11:06:00

Great word! Makes lots of 'scents'. - Mustang, 2008-03-06: 17:35:00

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2008-03-06: 00:01:00
Today's definition was suggested by Nosila. Thank you Nosila. ~ James

purpleartichokes - 2008-03-06: 21:11:00
Love the 'toon today James. I think my boss is considering installing one on our bathroom doors, complete with an age-appropriate timer, which leaves me wondering when I'm gonna get a chance to pluck my eyebrows.

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2008-03-07: 06:05:00
Thanks Purple, Is there a personal purpose code for plucking your eyebrows? ~ James

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-05-17: 00:00:00
Today's definition was suggested by Nosila. Thank you Nosila. ~ James