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'I guess I'll do a little window shopping...'

DEFINITION: v. What boyfriends and husbands do while they are waiting their girlfriends and/or wives to shop. n. A person doing such a thing.

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Verboticisms

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Slowmad

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: SLO-mad

Sentence: As Tom wandered from store to store waiting for his wife to finish her shopping he became just one more slowmad, looking over each item as if he really cared, fending off sales clerks with the slowmad's mantra "Just looking". He also knew that this activity was slowly driving him stark-raving mad. He could feel his sanity slipping away with each step he took. The last thing he wanted to become was a husbutt-parker — those old men who take up every inch of available bench space vacantly staring into space while a mound of packages accumulates at their feet.

Etymology: Slow (Very not fast) + nomad (a desert wanderer)

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx RIGHT ON! Great sentence, artr. - metrohumanx, 2008-08-28: 03:03:00

metrohumanx Slowmad reminds me of Strongbad. http://www.homestarrunner.com/sbemail.html - metrohumanx, 2008-08-28: 03:38:00

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Liearound

Created by: astorey

Pronunciation: lye-a-round

Sentence: Tom didn't know why Mindy was so eager for his validation when she was buying clothes, but he had long since become accustomed to his role...he needed to liearound the dressing room, saying encouraging--though not completely honest-- things things like "No you're butt doesn't look fat" or "I don't think that black dress looks too much like your other black dress."

Etymology: lie in two senses--to not tell the truth and to lounge; around in the sense of either prevaricating or lounging in proximity to the shopping.

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Windowschlump

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: win - doe - shlump

Sentence: Whenever Minnie would involve herself shopping she did so in a dedicated fashion that left Monty to manage for himself and he would always windowschlump, mindlessly wandrering from store to store looking at the displays.

Etymology: Blend of 'window' and 'schlump' (to loaf or idle)

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx I've seen a clump of WINDOWSCHLUMPS, and shuffled right along. - metrohumanx, 2008-08-27: 00:54:00

very descriptive - Jabberwocky, 2008-08-27: 16:03:00

Ah, Metrohx: you better tell Monty where the store with the 'semi erotic mannequins' is situated. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-08-28: 01:05:00

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Masterwait

Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: mas/ter/weyt

Sentence: To keep her happy, he goes along shopping and will masterwait patiently while she tries on every pair of shoes in the store.

Etymology: master (of course she is this) + wait

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COMMENTS:

Oh geez, I just now "got it"! Funny! - purpleartichokes, 2007-09-26: 11:55:00

joelb Ah you beat me to it!! >:) Voting now. - joelb, 2007-09-26: 21:55:00

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Mallschlump

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: mawl-shlump

Sentence: While most men might get fidgety when their wives browse thru the stores, Marty takes great delight in an opportunity to just mallschlump, wherein he'll cruise around from business to business checking out babes, window displays and oddball people.

Etymology: blend of words 'mall' (n. large retail complex containing a variety of stores and often restaurants ) and 'schlump' (v. to loaf or idle)

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Anticapprasion

Created by: SethelMerman

Pronunciation: An-tiss-uh-pray-shun

Sentence: Thinking of his credit card bill and the countless bags from Macy's, passed the time during his anticappraision.

Etymology: From (anticipation: in waiting) + (appraise: judge value)

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Shoperfunctorate

Created by: OZZIEBOB

Pronunciation: shop-pur-FUNKSHO-rate

Sentence: Bob is not an optimist, he never double parks while Roxie is shopping. All he hopes for, as he shoperfunctorates, is that Roxie's feet will start to hurt before his wallet does. And when she's seriously shoprocrasty, he never ridicules her or becomes boutique-piqued, but remains mart-smart even when she tries on a dozen dresses and an imelda of shoes.

Etymology: Blend of shop & perfunctorate: done merely to get rid of the duty, performed mechanically, by rote, superficially. Cognates: Shoperfunctory, Shoperfunctoriness.

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COMMENTS:

I love boutique-piqued and the imelda of shoes - Jabberwocky, 2007-09-26: 10:46:00

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Gapetient

Created by: readerwriter

Pronunciation: gape.shunt

Sentence: Willard knew the routine as a practiced gapetient: wait outside the dressing rooms, holding the clothes his wife couldn't take in. After she had tried on all her selected items (several trips back and forth), pinched her cellulite while staring into the mirrors until she was bruised, she would appear and say there wasn't a thing she could use. Yes, he had suffered all these years with great gapetience. All this because he had thought she was the cutest car hop at Bob's Big Boy in Glendale in 1963.

Etymology: combination of gape, to stare with mouth open wide + patient, uncomplaining endurace or as well, a person undergoing treatment for disease!

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx Beautiful writing...and hilarious.Thanks RW - metrohumanx, 2008-08-28: 03:29:00

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Malloiter

Created by: apathy42

Pronunciation:

Sentence:

Etymology:

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Mallinger

Created by: kabloozie

Pronunciation: Mahl-LING-er

Sentence: Two hours after the Wife entered Old Navy, Bob was seen in the food court, mallingering on the cement bench with an empty bag of Cinnabons.

Etymology: Mall: a large retail complex with no hardware stores. Linger: to pass time in a tedious manner.

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COMMENTS:

wow. my first verboticism....sniff. - kabloozie, 2007-09-26: 02:26:00

petaj It's a good one too. No auto parts stores in a Mall either. - petaj, 2007-09-26: 04:44:00

good start! - galwaywegian, 2007-09-26: 07:22:00

wow - what a debut!! - Jabberwocky, 2007-09-26: 10:42:00

Perhaps Bob should have lingered in lingerie boutique. Might not have been so teduous for him ! Good start:good word. - OZZIEBOB, 2007-09-26: 18:44:00

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-09-26: 00:01:00
Today's definition was suggested by kabloozie. Thank you kabloozie! ~ James

metrohumanx metrohumanx - 2008-08-27: 00:50:00
Can't you be arrested for MASTERWAITING in public?

galwaywegian - 2008-08-27: 05:56:00
Or masterbaiting at college

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2011-06-08: 00:16:00
Today's definition was suggested by kabloozie. Thank you kabloozie. ~ James