Verboticisms

Created by: readerwriter

Pronunciation: gape.shunt

Sentence: Willard knew the routine as a practiced gapetient: wait outside the dressing rooms, holding the clothes his wife couldn't take in. After she had tried on all her selected items (several trips back and forth), pinched her cellulite while staring into the mirrors until she was bruised, she would appear and say there wasn't a thing she could use. Yes, he had suffered all these years with great gapetience. All this because he had thought she was the cutest car hop at Bob's Big Boy in Glendale in 1963.

Etymology: combination of gape, to stare with mouth open wide + patient, uncomplaining endurace or as well, a person undergoing treatment for disease!

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COMMENTS:

Beautiful writing...and hilarious.Thanks RW - metrohumanx, 2008-08-28: 03:29:00

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Created by: Magic94

Pronunciation: L-oi-ling

Sentence: Geoff had to stand and leul whilst Jane looked through Marks and Spencers.

Etymology:

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Created by: cfinleyca

Pronunciation: man-stra-wait

Sentence: Dude, she was in there for an hour. I had to manstrawait in that stupid little chair. Oh, this time I am going to have to do some serious manstrawaition at the mall.

Etymology: man + (sterbate) + wait

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COMMENTS:

my first attempt - cfinleyca, 2007-09-26: 17:19:00

cool! - kachungis, 2007-09-26: 21:27:00

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Created by: astorey

Pronunciation: lye-a-round

Sentence: Tom didn't know why Mindy was so eager for his validation when she was buying clothes, but he had long since become accustomed to his role...he needed to liearound the dressing room, saying encouraging--though not completely honest-- things things like "No you're butt doesn't look fat" or "I don't think that black dress looks too much like your other black dress."

Etymology: lie in two senses--to not tell the truth and to lounge; around in the sense of either prevaricating or lounging in proximity to the shopping.

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Created by: artr

Pronunciation: SLO-mad

Sentence: As Tom wandered from store to store waiting for his wife to finish her shopping he became just one more slowmad, looking over each item as if he really cared, fending off sales clerks with the slowmad's mantra "Just looking". He also knew that this activity was slowly driving him stark-raving mad. He could feel his sanity slipping away with each step he took. The last thing he wanted to become was a husbutt-parker — those old men who take up every inch of available bench space vacantly staring into space while a mound of packages accumulates at their feet.

Etymology: Slow (Very not fast) + nomad (a desert wanderer)

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COMMENTS:

RIGHT ON! Great sentence, artr. - metrohumanx, 2008-08-28: 03:03:00

Slowmad reminds me of Strongbad. http://www.homestarrunner.com/sbemail.html - metrohumanx, 2008-08-28: 03:38:00

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Created by: ErWenn

Pronunciation: /buˈtikˌge(ɪ)t/

Sentence: We who are stuck boutiquegating our significant others are very thankful to those few store designers who thought to provide comfortable seating just outside the dressing rooms.

Etymology: from boutique + tailgate

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Created by: gazissax

Pronunciation: wun -der-lust

Sentence: Jane was busy trying on bras in the back room, so Jack engaged in a little wonderlust at the women passing through.

Etymology: wonder - to be filled with admiration, amazement, or awe; marvel; and lust - to have a yearning or desire; have a strong or excessive craving

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COMMENTS:

Did Jane have wonderbralust? - petaj, 2007-09-26: 04:43:00

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Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: win - doe - shlump

Sentence: Whenever Minnie would involve herself shopping she did so in a dedicated fashion that left Monty to manage for himself and he would always windowschlump, mindlessly wandrering from store to store looking at the displays.

Etymology: Blend of 'window' and 'schlump' (to loaf or idle)

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COMMENTS:

I've seen a clump of WINDOWSCHLUMPS, and shuffled right along. - metrohumanx, 2008-08-27: 00:54:00

very descriptive - Jabberwocky, 2008-08-27: 16:03:00

Ah, Metrohx: you better tell Monty where the store with the 'semi erotic mannequins' is situated. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-08-28: 01:05:00

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Created by: porsche

Pronunciation: gap/tiv

Sentence: He wanted to be at home watching the game but instead he was held gaptive at the Gap outlet

Etymology: gap + captive

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Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: funn dress sing

Sentence: I judged that the from the frost hardening on my spectacles that the hot redhead in the queue for the changing rooms was aware that she was being fundressed.

Etymology: undressing, fun

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COMMENTS:

I think I've fundrestimated all the weary shoppers - now I'm aware of the fundertones - Jabberwocky, 2007-09-26: 10:40:00

that should be funderestimated - Jabberwocky, 2007-09-26: 10:41:00

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