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'I guess I'll do a little window shopping...'

DEFINITION: v. What boyfriends and husbands do while they are waiting their girlfriends and/or wives to shop. n. A person doing such a thing.

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Vapidrift

metrohumanx

Created by: metrohumanx

Pronunciation: VAY-pih-DRIFT

Sentence: Lawrence could not bring himself to follow his wife into the Aromabody Boutique, even to dampen her urge to spend,spend, spend. Instead , he chose voluntary exile to the mallhall, where he would VAPIDRIFT with the herd of patient husbandry, a hundred-meter stare in his glazed eyes. Teen girls, ancient immigrants and momshoppers piloting triple tandem strollers jockeyed around him as he waited for the prized seat on a hard plastic bench. Time stretched to infinity as other VAPIDRIFTERS milled around in their assigned areas - no more than ten steps from the entrance, but not too close to the semi-erotic manneqins in the windows of BarnDress Woman discount plus-size fashion emporium. There would be no mercy for the man who wandered away. Lawrence checked his watch for the umpteenth time, resigned to his fate as a docile consumer support unit.

Etymology: VAPId+DRIFT=VAPIDRIFT.....Vapid: lacking liveliness, tang, briskness, or force- Latin vapidus flat-tasting; akin to Latin vappa flat wine and perhaps to Latin vapor steam......DRIFT:something driven, propelled, or urged along or drawn together in a clump by or as if by a natural agency- Middle English; akin to Old English drīfan to drive.

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx We regret the passing of Laurence Urdang. 1927-2008 - metrohumanx, 2008-08-27: 00:49:00

how tragic - Jabberwocky, 2008-08-27: 16:03:00

Another great word and real-life story. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-08-28: 00:59:00

metrohumanx Some day, lad...all this will be yours. - metrohumanx, 2008-08-28: 03:37:00

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Mallancholy

Created by: Scrumpy

Pronunciation: mahl-uhn-kuhl-eee

Sentence: Dave went mallancholy as he stood holding Debra's handbag at the Emasculation Station outlet store.

Etymology: mall + melancholy

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COMMENTS:

funny - Jabberwocky, 2007-09-26: 11:50:00

Seems as if Dave got himself into a eunuch predickament. Might decide to keep the handbag! - OZZIEBOB, 2007-09-26: 22:19:00

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Boycaught

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: boy kot

Sentence: When she took her boyfriend shopping, which he hated, he hung around outside the building as a boycaught. He really should have gone into the store, as she was getting final fitting for her wedding dress...

Etymology: Boy (Man or young male) & Caught (the act of catching something)...wordplay on boycott (to ignore;a group's refusal to have commercial dealings with some organization in protest against its policies)

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Guybrowse

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: gye browz

Sentence: Most men hate shopping and even worse hate waiting while someone they are with shops. Mark was no exception and when his wife Lana dragged him to the store to wait for her to try on some new fashions, he took that waiting opportunity to guybrowse in other departments. When Lana finished shopping in a department store, armed with lots of bags and boxes, she then would waste half an hour looking for Mark. Invariably she'd find him sampling free food; catching up on the latest thought-provoking articles in Playboy Magazine; watching a big screen TV football game or trying out the latest Lazyboy recliner. She often wished that the stores would smarten up and copy an idea of Harrod's. They had a lounge area similar to a gentleman's club, with comfy wingback chairs set in a room with television and newspapers, serving cold ale to waiting guybrows. It was like a nursery for men.

Etymology: Guy (male;an informal term for a youth or man) & Browse (look around casually and randomly, without seeking anything in particular;shop around; not necessarily buying) & rhyming with: Eyebrows (the arch of hair above each eye...when raised it acts as an unspoken question (Are you really buying that?)

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx You never let us down, Nosila. Mark had a lot of nerve- I would NEVER break with protocol and drft away from the store entrance... - metrohumanx, 2008-08-27: 00:58:00

funny - Jabberwocky, 2008-08-27: 16:05:00

How true. It takes years of practice to become a champion guybrowser. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-08-28: 00:53:00

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Windower

Created by: dessessopsid

Pronunciation:

Sentence: Greg became a windower everytime he went shopping with Janine.

Etymology: Window: the display space in and directly behind a shop window. And Widower: a man who has lost his wife by death and has not remarried.

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Holostasis

Created by: doceanjo

Pronunciation: Hó + los +istasis

Sentence: This is a holographic homeostasis biological concept it means holographic equilibrium.

Etymology: Holos + stasis

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx Holostasis is a great word. You should expound on it. - metrohumanx, 2008-08-28: 03:06:00

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Chickpick

Created by: purpleartichokes

Pronunciation: chik-pik

Sentence: While Sue was in the dressing room, Bob bided his time with a chickpick session. The first object of his scrutiny was slightly plump, but had nice hair. The second had a nice body, but egad, that eye brow ring had to go! The third had it all going for her, except for the fact that she talked through her nose. The fourth...

Etymology: nit pick, chick

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COMMENTS:

petaj a chick picnic - petaj, 2007-09-26: 04:45:00

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Manterval

Created by: Rhyme79

Pronunciation: mann-tuh-vawl

Sentence: Gideon had grown used to waiting outside of the changing rooms in women's shops. In fact he had learnt to almost enjoy mantervals and began to use the time more productively. Instead of spending hours on end waiting by racks of frocks staring at his shoes like he used to, he now uses being surrounded by women to his benefit. Gideon has picked up some of the most amazing make-up tips, he's learnt how to deal with period pain and can now tell the difference between shampoo and shower gel which he, like most men, previously believed were inter-changeable. The list goes on...

Etymology: Man (male adult human) + interval ( intervening period of time)

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Mallschlump

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: mawl-shlump

Sentence: While most men might get fidgety when their wives browse thru the stores, Marty takes great delight in an opportunity to just mallschlump, wherein he'll cruise around from business to business checking out babes, window displays and oddball people.

Etymology: blend of words 'mall' (n. large retail complex containing a variety of stores and often restaurants ) and 'schlump' (v. to loaf or idle)

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Waitwatching

Created by: hgofom

Pronunciation: Just like it looks.

Sentence: My wife went into the mall and I was left waitwatching.

Etymology: While waiting, we wait, and we watch. There are also several puns and entendres in the word. One is a play on the diet popular with many women. Another is that while we wait we're not only people watching, but frequently looking at our watches. Also, waitwatch, waitwatcher, etc.

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-09-26: 00:01:00
Today's definition was suggested by kabloozie. Thank you kabloozie! ~ James

metrohumanx metrohumanx - 2008-08-27: 00:50:00
Can't you be arrested for MASTERWAITING in public?

galwaywegian - 2008-08-27: 05:56:00
Or masterbaiting at college

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2011-06-08: 00:16:00
Today's definition was suggested by kabloozie. Thank you kabloozie. ~ James