Vote for the best verboticism.
DEFINITION: v. A software update or patch which uses up a ton of memory and hard drive space, stalling the computer with a crippling case of performance anxiety. n. To stall out a computer by installing a software "upgrade".
Verboticisms
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Bytehog
Created by: splendiction
Pronunciation: bite hog
Sentence: Pcsity proffered many "free" softwear updates to make the computing experience faster and easier. Jake installed one such update, or bytehog, in an effort to recover information on an online application page after the page expired. Jake’s lapshlop ran for four days completing the installation, only to discover another bytehog was needed to finish it. His lapshlop was hog-bitten! And Jake thought the online application form would be easier! That bytehog!
Etymology: From byte (a unit of memory on a computer) and hog - a being that hoards or monopolizes, in this case, one's computer memory/computer bytes.
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COMMENTS:
Clever! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-23: 21:54:00
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Upstall
Created by: QuantumMechanic
Pronunciation: up-stall
Sentence: I just upstalled that emergency patch, and it slowed to a crawl, before throwing an out of memory error and rebooting.
Etymology: Upgrade (load a new version) + stall (slow down or stop)
Scupperdate
Created by: muffinman
Pronunciation: Scup-per-date
Sentence: n. My computer went into meltdown last night after that Windows scupperdate started by itself. v. Windows started scupperdating my laptop last night because I left it to restart by mistake.
Etymology: Scupper + update = scupperdate
Giveupdate
Created by: Negatrev
Pronunciation: Giv-up-day-t
Sentence: Johnny left for lunch early as his workstation wasn't usable while it was giveupdating.
Etymology: give-up (to concede,relent) and update (to bring in line, to improve)
Connixion
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: kon iks eon
Sentence: Although she had been advised to do so, Marianne was reluctant to install another connixion to slow down her computer.
Etymology: Connexion ( the process of bringing ideas or events together in memory or imagination) & Nix (nothing;a quantity of no importance)
Retrofret
Created by: readerwriter
Pronunciation: reh-troh-freht
Sentence: To3m (the 3 was silent) had held onto his Commodore "Daisy" for so long that anytime he tried to update her, she pitched a retrofret.
Etymology: A play on RETROFIT, referring to an upgrade in technology + FRET, disturb or agitate
Adopeytablet
Created by: scrabbelicious
Pronunciation: Ah : dope : ee : tab : let
Sentence: It was no flash in the pan, Kernal Panic thought as he looked blankly at the draped screen on his new Adopeytablet. The last time this happened they told me it would be the last time this happened, so the Kernals recursion relationship with technology trundled on. I guess that's some kinda feedback loop or loop-the-loop.
Etymology: A : indefinite article : Dopey : drugged up or slow dwarf : Tablet : Pill, may be screened (6 letters). Pun on Adobe : A byword for nightmareish yet essential software, bring a tonne of RAM.
Useupgrade
Created by: Stevenson0
Pronunciation: use/up/grade
Sentence: The patch to fix the program uses more memory than the program itself, making it a useupgrade rather than a viable program.
Etymology: USEUPGRADE - from - USE UP + UPGRADE
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COMMENTS:
Good one! - TJayzz, 2009-02-23: 17:27:00
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Desktopdysfunction
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: desk top dis funk shun
Sentence: You know the embarrassment, the guilt, the feelings of inadequacy, the viagravvation. Yes, we've all seen the commercials to go to your doctor. But where does your computer go when it suffers from desktopdysfunction? There's no self help groups, no printed literature. All it can do is surf the net and hope for an antidote to the new patch you've installed. The one which was supposed to increase memory and speed, but which instead creates internet impotence. Maybe somewhere there's a cure, but until there's a celebrity spokesperson or a telethon to raise funds and awareness, what's a lowly desktop to do? It's hard-breaking...
Etymology: Desktop ((computer science) the area of the screen in graphical user interfaces against which icons and windows appear) & Dysfunction ((medicine) any disturbance in the function of an organ or body part). Play on erectile dysfunction (impotence resulting from a man's inability to have or maintain an erection)
Vaiogra
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: vai ou gra
Sentence: Minnie knew she had used too much vaiogra to upgrade her computer's performance. It had been more than four hours since she had not been able to turn off the computer and so it was now time to head to the PC emergency ward, before her terminal became terminal.
Etymology: Vaio ( a sub-brand used for many of Sony's computer products. Originally an acronym of Video Audio Integrated Operation, this was amended to Visual Audio Intelligent Organizer in 20080 & Viagra (virility drug (trade name Viagra) used to treat erectile dysfunction in men)
Comments:
Today's definition was suggested by silveryaspen. Thank you silveryaspen. ~ James
Today's definition was suggested by silveryaspen. Thank you silveryaspen. ~ James