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DEFINITION: v. A software update or patch which uses up a ton of memory and hard drive space, stalling the computer with a crippling case of performance anxiety. n. To stall out a computer by installing a software "upgrade".
Verboticisms
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Upstallation
Created by: BitCrack
Pronunciation: like installation, with up at the beginning.
Sentence: "watch out man, that Starcraft patch gave me some major upstallation"
Etymology:
Desktopdysfunction
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: desk top dis funk shun
Sentence: You know the embarrassment, the guilt, the feelings of inadequacy, the viagravvation. Yes, we've all seen the commercials to go to your doctor. But where does your computer go when it suffers from desktopdysfunction? There's no self help groups, no printed literature. All it can do is surf the net and hope for an antidote to the new patch you've installed. The one which was supposed to increase memory and speed, but which instead creates internet impotence. Maybe somewhere there's a cure, but until there's a celebrity spokesperson or a telethon to raise funds and awareness, what's a lowly desktop to do? It's hard-breaking...
Etymology: Desktop ((computer science) the area of the screen in graphical user interfaces against which icons and windows appear) & Dysfunction ((medicine) any disturbance in the function of an organ or body part). Play on erectile dysfunction (impotence resulting from a man's inability to have or maintain an erection)
Dualsnore
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: doōəlsnôr
Sentence: Ryan is diligent about winstalling every patch and wupgrade that comes along. The latest one turned his fancy dualcore processor into a dualsnore. He can't understand how his bestest-friends-ever at Windows could have let him down. Surely they couldn't have made a mistake. He decides that he must have done something wrong in downloading or winstalling the patch to the patch so he'll wait patiently for the patch to the patch to the patch.
Etymology: dual core (A multi-core processor) + snore (a snorting or grunting sound in a person's breathing while asleep)(a thing that is extremely boring)
Upgreyed
Created by: galwaywegian
Pronunciation: uhp grayd
Sentence: she started the upgrade five hours and the screen was still upgreyed.
Etymology: upgrade greyed
Giveupdate
Created by: Negatrev
Pronunciation: Giv-up-day-t
Sentence: Johnny left for lunch early as his workstation wasn't usable while it was giveupdating.
Etymology: give-up (to concede,relent) and update (to bring in line, to improve)
Bugfixative
Created by: petaj
Pronunciation: bug-fix-a-tiv
Sentence: Help Desk? Have you tried turning it off and on? Yes, but that last patch you pushed out has caused by beetle screensaver to become stuck and I can't do anything! Help! You'll have to go online and log a job to review the bugfixative, then we can address it. But, I can't do anything, not even go online to log a job.
Etymology: bug fix (patch) + fixative (glue, adhesive to hold everything firmly in place, makes things stick)
Upstall
Created by: QuantumMechanic
Pronunciation: up-stall
Sentence: I just upstalled that emergency patch, and it slowed to a crawl, before throwing an out of memory error and rebooting.
Etymology: Upgrade (load a new version) + stall (slow down or stop)
Vistahault
Created by: coachcorrie26
Pronunciation: Vista (windows operating system) hault (to stop)
Sentence: Please do not update my laptop online with all that lollygagging nonsense because it can cause a "vistahault" and crash my entire system!
Etymology: vista (meaning beautiful/wonderful view - my beautiful/wonderful computer's view through the monitor via hard-drive) will hault (stop) running and crash my entire system!
Busplug
Created by: metrohumanx
Pronunciation: Just the way it looks...
Sentence: Rondo fancied himself a computer expert. When he "helped" Lulu upgrade her purloined laptop by downloading the approved version of "service pack 5", he inadvertently created a BUSPLUG similar to the "blue screen of death" so popular in the last century. Rondo's motives were pure, and he offered to buy Lulu a donut and help her "work it out"....even if it took all night!
Etymology: BUS+PLUG=BUSPLUG(busplugged, busplugging).....BUS:In computer architecture, a bus is a subsystem that transfers data between computer components inside a computer or between computers......PLUG:a piece used to fill a hole, a stopper, an obtruding or obstructing mass of material resembling a stopper, any of various devices resembling or functioning like a plug, a male fitting for making an electrical connection to a live circuit by insertion in a receptacle.
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COMMENTS:
Sorry about this one, gang. I just couldn'r resist it.... - metrohumanx, 2009-02-23: 00:30:00
Hope he has some Viaoagra - Nosila, 2009-02-23: 00:46:00
While tecnically inaccurate, i just went with it because it was slopping over with subtlety and nuance... - metrohumanx, 2009-02-23: 01:01:00
Naughty but good, so will cut you some slaxative! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-23: 11:20:00
BUSPLUG similar to the "blue screen of death" - abrakadeborah, 2009-03-25: 14:09:00
BUSPLUG similar to the "blue screen of death" - abrakadeborah, 2009-03-25: 14:10:00
WHY doesn't this site pick up the entire comment instead of just parts...???? Ugh - abrakadeborah, 2009-03-25: 14:10:00
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Vaiogra
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: vai ou gra
Sentence: Minnie knew she had used too much vaiogra to upgrade her computer's performance. It had been more than four hours since she had not been able to turn off the computer and so it was now time to head to the PC emergency ward, before her terminal became terminal.
Etymology: Vaio ( a sub-brand used for many of Sony's computer products. Originally an acronym of Video Audio Integrated Operation, this was amended to Visual Audio Intelligent Organizer in 20080 & Viagra (virility drug (trade name Viagra) used to treat erectile dysfunction in men)
Comments:
Today's definition was suggested by silveryaspen. Thank you silveryaspen. ~ James
Today's definition was suggested by silveryaspen. Thank you silveryaspen. ~ James