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'I don't let my laptop date!'

DEFINITION: v. A software update or patch which uses up a ton of memory and hard drive space, stalling the computer with a crippling case of performance anxiety. n. To stall out a computer by installing a software "upgrade".

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Verboticisms

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Giveupdate

Created by: Negatrev

Pronunciation: Giv-up-day-t

Sentence: Johnny left for lunch early as his workstation wasn't usable while it was giveupdating.

Etymology: give-up (to concede,relent) and update (to bring in line, to improve)

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Webstuck

Created by: silveryaspen

Pronunciation: web stuk

Sentence: It takes so long for some embedded files, they should call them inbedded files, for they take all night! ET hated spyware, and wished they made spryware, a program for nimble and quick downloads. ET didn't call it a web stack, he called it a webstuck! While waiting for his software on demand to download, ET not only had time to phone home, but every one on his home planet!

Etymology: WEBSTUCK is a play on WEB STACK, Web stack is the term used to refer to software stacks in Web development environments. The stack of software, mainly comprised of open source software, will contain an operating system, Web server, database server, and programming language. One of the most most well-known web stacks is LAMP. Let us hope it will enlighten our way!

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COMMENTS:

very apt - Jabberwocky, 2009-02-23: 15:52:00

Like it - TJayzz, 2009-02-23: 17:26:00

Beeee good! - Nosila, 2009-02-23: 21:48:00

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Executabledysfunction

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: ecks-uh-cute-abuhl-dis-FUNCT-shun

Sentence: Heinrich cursed his aging laptop when it experience severe executabledysfuntion when he tried to download and install a system update of utmost importance.

Etymology: Blend of executable and dysfunction, a play on the term 'erectile dysfunction'

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx Hahahaahah...Heinrich! das ist GUT! - metrohumanx, 2009-02-23: 00:55:00

Killer creation! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-23: 10:49:00

Hee! Hee! - TJayzz, 2009-02-23: 18:55:00

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Blindupdate

Created by: feltcap

Pronunciation: blīndŭp-dāt'

Sentence: Similar to that uneasy feeling you get when one of your friends sets you up he was nervous going into the blindupdate. He was worried that it would result in the same kind of feeling he had on his last blind date - will it ever end!?

Etymology: blind date - a social engagement between two persons who have not previously met, update - the act of instance of bringing something up to date

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Floptimize

Created by: FreakyDeak

Pronunciation: flop-tim-eyes

Sentence: The decision to floptimize my computer was a wrong one, seeing as it can now barely perform addition.

Etymology: Flop-optimize

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COMMENTS:

It was either this or stoptimize - FreakyDeak, 2010-09-08: 02:53:00

nice - galwaywegian, 2010-09-08: 08:57:00

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Pleasewaiteternity

GlobalGallery

Created by: GlobalGallery

Pronunciation: pleez-wayt-urn-itee

Sentence: "That site has everything" proclaimed Charles, "All the coolest games, movies, and TV shows, and it's all free". William sat there staring eagerly at the screen. He was just moments away from accessing a treasure trove of quality content. Those moments became minutes and the loading bar kept restarting. William was facing a pleasewaiternity when he realised that the promise was too good to be true and the site was a dud. Then his keyboard, mouse and screen all locked up in synchronized chaos.

Etymology: Loading please wait... + eternity (forever)

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Arthridical

Created by: letty

Pronunciation:

Sentence: You have an arthridical patient.

Etymology:

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Busstop

Created by: otherguy

Pronunciation: bəsstäp

Sentence: The latest "gotta-install-it-or-your-computer-will-blow-up" patch to the patch to the patch turned out to be a complete busstop on my computer. (I'm writing this on a friend's laptop)

Etymology: bus: a distinct set of conductors carrying data and control signals within a computer system, to which pieces of equipment may be connected in parallel + stop: come to an end; cease to happen

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COMMENTS:

artr Ooh, sounds personal! - artr, 2009-02-23: 07:24:00

did busplug inspire you? - silveryaspen, 2009-02-23: 11:26:00

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Freezamavista

Created by: kateinkorea

Pronunciation: FREE zah mah VEES tah

Sentence: June came in and found me working on her computer trying to give her the office upgrades. The next thing she's saying "Hasta la vista, Baby. Back away from my computer. You are not going to freezamavista." "Hasta la vista to you too June. And I won't be back," I told her.

Etymology: FREEZE: as in computer freeze MY: VISTA: operating system PLAY ON HASTA LA VISTA: see you later in Spanish

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Adopeytablet

Created by: scrabbelicious

Pronunciation: Ah : dope : ee : tab : let

Sentence: It was no flash in the pan, Kernal Panic thought as he looked blankly at the draped screen on his new Adopeytablet. The last time this happened they told me it would be the last time this happened, so the Kernals recursion relationship with technology trundled on. I guess that's some kinda feedback loop or loop-the-loop.

Etymology: A : indefinite article : Dopey : drugged up or slow dwarf : Tablet : Pill, may be screened (6 letters). Pun on Adobe : A byword for nightmareish yet essential software, bring a tonne of RAM.

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2009-02-23: 00:01:01
Today's definition was suggested by silveryaspen. Thank you silveryaspen. ~ James

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-09-06: 00:31:00
Today's definition was suggested by silveryaspen. Thank you silveryaspen. ~ James