Vote for the best verboticism.
DEFINITION: v. A software update or patch which uses up a ton of memory and hard drive space, stalling the computer with a crippling case of performance anxiety. n. To stall out a computer by installing a software "upgrade".
Verboticisms
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Bugfixative
Created by: petaj
Pronunciation: bug-fix-a-tiv
Sentence: Help Desk? Have you tried turning it off and on? Yes, but that last patch you pushed out has caused by beetle screensaver to become stuck and I can't do anything! Help! You'll have to go online and log a job to review the bugfixative, then we can address it. But, I can't do anything, not even go online to log a job.
Etymology: bug fix (patch) + fixative (glue, adhesive to hold everything firmly in place, makes things stick)
Vistahault
Created by: coachcorrie26
Pronunciation: Vista (windows operating system) hault (to stop)
Sentence: Please do not update my laptop online with all that lollygagging nonsense because it can cause a "vistahault" and crash my entire system!
Etymology: vista (meaning beautiful/wonderful view - my beautiful/wonderful computer's view through the monitor via hard-drive) will hault (stop) running and crash my entire system!
Upstallation
Created by: BitCrack
Pronunciation: like installation, with up at the beginning.
Sentence: "watch out man, that Starcraft patch gave me some major upstallation"
Etymology:
Desktopdysfunction
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: desk top dis funk shun
Sentence: You know the embarrassment, the guilt, the feelings of inadequacy, the viagravvation. Yes, we've all seen the commercials to go to your doctor. But where does your computer go when it suffers from desktopdysfunction? There's no self help groups, no printed literature. All it can do is surf the net and hope for an antidote to the new patch you've installed. The one which was supposed to increase memory and speed, but which instead creates internet impotence. Maybe somewhere there's a cure, but until there's a celebrity spokesperson or a telethon to raise funds and awareness, what's a lowly desktop to do? It's hard-breaking...
Etymology: Desktop ((computer science) the area of the screen in graphical user interfaces against which icons and windows appear) & Dysfunction ((medicine) any disturbance in the function of an organ or body part). Play on erectile dysfunction (impotence resulting from a man's inability to have or maintain an erection)
Executabledysfunction
Created by: Mustang
Pronunciation: ecks-uh-cute-abuhl-dis-FUNCT-shun
Sentence: Brad cursed his aging laptop when it experience severe executabledysfuntion when he tried to download and install a system update of utmost importance.
Etymology: Blend of 'executable' (An executable file is a file that is used to perform various functions or operations on a computer) and 'dysfunction' (when something doesn't operate normally), a play on the term 'erectile dysfunction'
Upgreyed
Created by: galwaywegian
Pronunciation: up graeed
Sentence: the upgrade upgreyed
Etymology: upgrade greyed out
Dualsnore
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: doōəlsnôr
Sentence: Ryan is diligent about winstalling every patch and wupgrade that comes along. The latest one turned his fancy dualcore processor into a dualsnore. He can't understand how his bestest-friends-ever at Windows could have let him down. Surely they couldn't have made a mistake. He decides that he must have done something wrong in downloading or winstalling the patch to the patch so he'll wait patiently for the patch to the patch to the patch.
Etymology: dual core (A multi-core processor) + snore (a snorting or grunting sound in a person's breathing while asleep)(a thing that is extremely boring)
Busstop
Created by: otherguy
Pronunciation: bəsstäp
Sentence: The latest "gotta-install-it-or-your-computer-will-blow-up" patch to the patch to the patch turned out to be a complete busstop on my computer. (I'm writing this on a friend's laptop)
Etymology: bus: a distinct set of conductors carrying data and control signals within a computer system, to which pieces of equipment may be connected in parallel + stop: come to an end; cease to happen
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COMMENTS:
Ooh, sounds personal! - artr, 2009-02-23: 07:24:00
did busplug inspire you? - silveryaspen, 2009-02-23: 11:26:00
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Useupgrade
Created by: Stevenson0
Pronunciation: use/up/grade
Sentence: The patch to fix the program uses more memory than the program itself, making it a useupgrade rather than a viable program.
Etymology: USEUPGRADE - from - USE UP + UPGRADE
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COMMENTS:
Good one! - TJayzz, 2009-02-23: 17:27:00
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Floptimize
Created by: FreakyDeak
Pronunciation: flop-tim-eyes
Sentence: The decision to floptimize my computer was a wrong one, seeing as it can now barely perform addition.
Etymology: Flop-optimize
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COMMENTS:
It was either this or stoptimize - FreakyDeak, 2010-09-08: 02:53:00
nice - galwaywegian, 2010-09-08: 08:57:00
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Comments:
Today's definition was suggested by silveryaspen. Thank you silveryaspen. ~ James
Today's definition was suggested by silveryaspen. Thank you silveryaspen. ~ James