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'I don't let my laptop date!'

DEFINITION: v. A software update or patch which uses up a ton of memory and hard drive space, stalling the computer with a crippling case of performance anxiety. n. To stall out a computer by installing a software "upgrade".

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Verboticisms

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Blindupdate

Created by: feltcap

Pronunciation: blīndŭp-dāt'

Sentence: Similar to that uneasy feeling you get when one of your friends sets you up he was nervous going into the blindupdate. He was worried that it would result in the same kind of feeling he had on his last blind date - will it ever end!?

Etymology: blind date - a social engagement between two persons who have not previously met, update - the act of instance of bringing something up to date

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Bugfixative

petaj

Created by: petaj

Pronunciation: bug-fix-a-tiv

Sentence: Help Desk? Have you tried turning it off and on? Yes, but that last patch you pushed out has caused by beetle screensaver to become stuck and I can't do anything! Help! You'll have to go online and log a job to review the bugfixative, then we can address it. But, I can't do anything, not even go online to log a job.

Etymology: bug fix (patch) + fixative (glue, adhesive to hold everything firmly in place, makes things stick)

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Floptimize

Created by: FreakyDeak

Pronunciation: flop-tim-eyes

Sentence: The decision to floptimize my computer was a wrong one, seeing as it can now barely perform addition.

Etymology: Flop-optimize

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COMMENTS:

It was either this or stoptimize - FreakyDeak, 2010-09-08: 02:53:00

nice - galwaywegian, 2010-09-08: 08:57:00

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Windowsupdate

DnBrown

Created by: DnBrown

Pronunciation:

Sentence:

Etymology:

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Executabledysfunction

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: ecks-uh-cute-abuhl-dis-FUNCT-shun

Sentence: Heinrich cursed his aging laptop when it experience severe executabledysfuntion when he tried to download and install a system update of utmost importance.

Etymology: Blend of executable and dysfunction, a play on the term 'erectile dysfunction'

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx Hahahaahah...Heinrich! das ist GUT! - metrohumanx, 2009-02-23: 00:55:00

Killer creation! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-23: 10:49:00

Hee! Hee! - TJayzz, 2009-02-23: 18:55:00

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Upstall

Created by: QuantumMechanic

Pronunciation: up-stall

Sentence: I just upstalled that emergency patch, and it slowed to a crawl, before throwing an out of memory error and rebooting.

Etymology: Upgrade (load a new version) + stall (slow down or stop)

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Vaiogra

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: vai ou gra

Sentence: Minnie knew she had used too much vaiogra to upgrade her computer's performance. It had been more than four hours since she had not been able to turn off the computer and so it was now time to head to the PC emergency ward, before her terminal became terminal.

Etymology: Vaio ( a sub-brand used for many of Sony's computer products. Originally an acronym of Video Audio Integrated Operation, this was amended to Visual Audio Intelligent Organizer in 20080 & Viagra (virility drug (trade name Viagra) used to treat erectile dysfunction in men)

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Adopeytablet

Created by: scrabbelicious

Pronunciation: Ah : dope : ee : tab : let

Sentence: It was no flash in the pan, Kernal Panic thought as he looked blankly at the draped screen on his new Adopeytablet. The last time this happened they told me it would be the last time this happened, so the Kernals recursion relationship with technology trundled on. I guess that's some kinda feedback loop or loop-the-loop.

Etymology: A : indefinite article : Dopey : drugged up or slow dwarf : Tablet : Pill, may be screened (6 letters). Pun on Adobe : A byword for nightmareish yet essential software, bring a tonne of RAM.

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Upstallation

BitCrack

Created by: BitCrack

Pronunciation: like installation, with up at the beginning.

Sentence: "watch out man, that Starcraft patch gave me some major upstallation"

Etymology:

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Dualsnore

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: doōəlsnôr

Sentence: Ryan is diligent about winstalling every patch and wupgrade that comes along. The latest one turned his fancy dualcore processor into a dualsnore. He can't understand how his bestest-friends-ever at Windows could have let him down. Surely they couldn't have made a mistake. He decides that he must have done something wrong in downloading or winstalling the patch to the patch so he'll wait patiently for the patch to the patch to the patch.

Etymology: dual core (A multi-core processor) + snore (a snorting or grunting sound in a person's breathing while asleep)(a thing that is extremely boring)

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2009-02-23: 00:01:01
Today's definition was suggested by silveryaspen. Thank you silveryaspen. ~ James

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-09-06: 00:31:00
Today's definition was suggested by silveryaspen. Thank you silveryaspen. ~ James