Vote for the best verboticism.
DEFINITION: n. A tool which has been re-purposed and is now being used (perhaps unsafely) to perform a completely different function. v. To use a tool for a different purpose than for which it was originally designed.
Verboticisms
Click on each verboticism to read the sentences created by the Verbotomy writers, and to see your voting options...
You have two votes. Click on the words to read the details, then vote your favorite.
Megatool
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: megətoōl
Sentence: Gene believes in the megatool approach to life. If a task requires the use of a tool bigger is always better. He has a military surplus flame thrower that he uses to start his charcoal grill. You have a rusty bolt? If his jaws-of-life can't loosen it, they can lop it off so you can replace it. His wife drew the line when he started talking about a pneumatic hammer fly swatter. She has 911 on speed-dial.
Etymology: mega (very large; huge) + tool (a device or implement, esp. one held in the hand, used to carry out a particular function)
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COMMENTS:
Perhaps Gene is a megatool for Black & Decker. - otherguy, 2009-03-09: 06:43:00
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Electrocutilize
Created by: karenanne
Pronunciation: ee lek tro CYU til ize
Sentence: Stumpy likes to electrocutilize power tools for more mundane purposes. Last year, he electrocutilized his belt sander to polish his shoes - while he was still wearing them. That's why his nickname is Stumpy.
Etymology: electrocute + utilize
Mixmasterplumber
Created by: Jabberwocky
Pronunciation: mix/mas/tur/plum/ur
Sentence: "Honey - this mixmasterplumber is working like a dream with the plug in the toilet and I'll be done in time for you to finish making the birthday cake."
Etymology: Mixmaster + master plumber
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COMMENTS:
Yikes! - kateinkorea, 2009-03-09: 18:34:00
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Limplement
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: lim ple ment
Sentence: Eileen was attemting to use her recycled saw to trim her nose hairs. Unfortunately, it slipped and severed her leg, making it a limplement. She now spells her name I-Lean...
Etymology: Limb (arm or leg or tree branch) & Implement (tool, device, instrument)
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COMMENTS:
Are you sure her name wasn't Noeleen? - galwaywegian, 2013-07-04: 07:29:00
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Toastercoaster
Created by: Stevenson0
Pronunciation: toe/ster/coe/ster
Sentence: The toastercoaster is a wonderful invention for making toast and keeping your hot chocolate warm.
Etymology: toaster + coaster
Gadgetlag
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: gad jet lag
Sentence: Ever since Wilbur & Orville had sent air travel to the next plane, A.Fred O'Travel worked night and day to find something to help passengers get over the fear of flying. More specifically, he found passengers were not as much afraid of flying and as afraid of getting the dreaded jet lag, which could immobilize them upon disembarkment. So Fred made a device which helped passengers to calm down and not shout out as embarrassing statements as "They are going in the wrong direction" and turn them into positive statements, like, "We don't care where the pilots land, as long as it is on Earth!" Not only did this tool (which was placed in each passenger's drink, act as an anti-gadgetlag, it made the passengers remember a happy, ethereal experience, which made them want to book again and again with NirvanAir.
Etymology: gadget (a device that is very useful for a particular job) & Jet Lag(fatigue and sleep disturbance resulting from disruption of the body's normal circadian rhythm as a result of jet travel)
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COMMENTS:
Egad! - silveryaspen, 2009-03-10: 14:57:00
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Conglomergreats
Created by: silveryaspen
Pronunciation: cun glom er grates
Sentence: Alan Rench was out camping. He liked to rough it in the mountains. His sawtoothed blade doubled as his comb. His screw driver stirred his beans in the tin bucket, simmering over the campfire, as it hung by the tire iron, held aloft by his jack. His plate was one of his hubcaps. His pocket knife did triple duty, for he used it as his spoon and fork, too. He sang the old saw "I eat my beans with honey. I done it all my life. It makes 'em taste quite funny, but it keeps 'em on my knife." He also used his pocket knife to scrape his hubcap plate clean. Alan's multi-duty use of all his tools made them his conglomergreats!
Etymology: CONGLOMERATE - mix of many things. GREAT - large in number. So tools that be used for a mix of many things in a large number of ways are conglomergreats.
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COMMENTS:
It's a bit of a tongue twister, but if you can eat your beans off your knife, your tongue won't trip over it! - silveryaspen, 2009-03-09: 01:11:00
I'd LOVE to camp out with you! - metrohumanx, 2009-03-09: 01:13:00
Did you know you can cook flounder on your engine's manifold? It's VERY eco-efficient ! - metrohumanx, 2009-03-09: 02:18:00
I'd only cook a fish on the manifold for the halibut! And ps, silvery, they should be called BEEns! - Nosila, 2009-03-09: 22:53:00
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Machamorphosis
Created by: TJayzz
Pronunciation: Mak-a-mor-foe-sis
Sentence: Budding inventor Ivor Patent-Pending, cleverly adapted his ceiling fan every winter by machamorphosis so that it blew out hot air, thus being able to dry his clothes when the weather was bad.
Etymology: Blend of Machine(an apparatus using mechanical power) and Metamorphosis(alter, to change completely)
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COMMENTS:
RIGHT-O TJ!...and with a string attached, it makes an EXCELLENT cat toy! - metrohumanx, 2009-03-09: 02:20:00
Machamorphosis....like a luvely flutterby! - metrohumanx, 2009-03-09: 02:25:00
good one - galwaywegian, 2009-03-09: 14:27:00
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Pimplement
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: pimp le ment
Sentence: Janice had finally hit on the next great thing. She modified her belt sander to plane off the zits and blackheads on her T-Zone. She called it a pimplement. It seemed like a great idea at the time, but was never picked up by any of those companies who mass market new inventions. It seems their doctors and lawyers took exception to removing a layer of dermis in a painful manner with a rusty tool from the garage. Go figure!
Etymology: Pimple (zit;acne) & Implement (tool,instrument)
Comments:
Today's definition was suggested by metrohumanx. Thank you metrohumanx. ~ James
Thank YOU, James Gang...for the excellent illustrations! ARS LONGA VITA BREVIS! MetrohumanX
And thank you metrohumanx, for supplying so many wonderfully prickly ideas! ~ James
yellowbird - 2009-03-09: 20:52:00
Just the cartoon made me smile. No need to read the words today!
Today's definition was suggested by metrohumanx. Thank you metrohumanx. ~ James