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'Why can't you get it up?'

DEFINITION: n., A Christmas tree, ornament or caroler that, no matter how it is tied, tethered and tilted, refuses to stay upright. v., To be so full of Christmas cheer that you simply sparkle, twinkle and tip over.

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Mistlewoe

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: mis il wo

Sentence: When Ronnie decorates for Christmas, he always hangs up the mistletoe in the hopes that the pretty girls will kiss him under it. Sadly, he has never succeeded,he gets mistlewoe instead, because he hangs it from his belt buckle...

Etymology: Mistletoe (plant Druids worshipped and at Christmas today, if hung on door frame, the people under it must kiss)& Woe (misery, sadness)

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Pisaster

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: peez as ter

Sentence: Brad and Kate's first Christmas together as a married couple had been one misfortune after another. It apparently is better to remove the turkey innards before stuffing the bird. Who knew eggnog was made with raw eggs? Pet poodles should not eat fresh mistletoe. Plus Brad had picked out a spindly Christmas Tree which leaned and wobbled under the weight of its decorations. It was a Pisaster Pine, decorated with bows of folly, fa la la la la la, la la la la! It was unfirgiveable, needleless to say. Kate got busy and tried to hide its flaws with tinsel and garlands, but there was no hope of making it a stately evergreen. It was a Tannenbum! When both sets of parents arrived for Christmas dinner, Kate & Brad were surprised not to be criticized for their coniferous conundrum. Brad's gruffy Dad said the only thing to do in this case, was to put some Viagra in the tree water to keep it upright. Apparently his bark was worse than his bite!

Etymology: Pisa (The leaning Tower of) & Disaster (a state of extreme (usually irremediable) ruin and misfortune "His policies were a disaster";an event resulting in great loss and misfortune)

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COMMENTS:

Love the reference! - emdeejay, 2008-12-15: 02:52:00

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Tiltitis

Created by: mamamia

Pronunciation: til-ti-tis

Sentence: After countless attempts to get the xmas tree to stand upright, Kevin then realized he had been sold a tree that suffered from tiltitis.

Etymology: tilt-derived from the word tilt(having its original meaning) and itis usually you can find at the end of certain medical conditions.

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COMMENTS:

Damn, i hope this makes it to the b! - mamamia, 2008-12-15: 19:36:00

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Gyreveload

metrohumanx

Created by: metrohumanx

Pronunciation: jai-REV-uhl-ode...(gyrevelers, gyreveloaded)

Sentence: Mike and Christie thought they'd opt for a "real" Christmas tree this year, so they drove out to the countryside and purchased one from a reputable dealer who had set up shop in the parking lot of a defunct diner. When unwrapped, the tree turned out to be a real GYREVELOAD...crooked, unstable and surrounded by a festive brown heap of highly flammable droppings...much like the guy in the parking lot. It would take a kilo of fruitcake and a few litres of liberally spiked eggnog to get GYREVELOADED this special evening. Ho Ho Ho :)

Etymology: GYRate+rEVELry+lOAD=GYREVELOAD....GYRATE: revolve quickly and repeatedly around one's own axis,to oscillate with a circular or spiral motion; French-1856.....REVELRY:noisy partying or merrymaking; 15th century.....LOAD:the quantity that can be carried at one time by a specified means,a mass or weight supported by something,something that weighs down the mind or spirits,an intoxicating amount of liquor drunk; Middle English lod, from Old English lād support, carrying-12th century

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx http://isitchristmas.com/ - metrohumanx, 2008-12-17: 01:03:00

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Duglistfir

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: dug list fur

Sentence: The town fathers had ordered a large evergreen to be planted in the main square, so that it may be decorated each Christmas Season as the "First Tree". A huge Douglas Fir had been imported from the West and although healthy and full, it had a definite lean to it. They nicknamed it the DuglistFir. At first people laughed at the Leaning Tree, but miraculously on Christmas Eve it had straightened out and stood erect. The people were amazed until they realized that this change was inevitable. The town in question was not called Viagra Falls for nothing!

Etymology: Dug (created by digging); List (lean or tilt to one side) & Fir (any of various evergreen trees of the genus Abies; chiefly of upland areas, popular as a Christmas Tree)and word play on Douglas Fir (tall evergreen timber tree of western North America having resinous wood and short needles)

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Yulersdroop

Created by: OZZIEBOB

Pronunciation: YOOL-uhs-droop

Sentence: It was a sad case of yulersdroop as Bob's Christmas tree lay limp, in the sagging silence of the night, in a gloomy, groggy mistlethroe of dejected detumescence

Etymology: Yule, n. [OE. yol, [yogh]ol, AS. ge['o]l; akin to ge['o]la December or January, Icel. j[=o]l Yule, Ylir the name of a winter month, Sw. jul Christmas, Dan. juul, Goth. jiuleis November or December. Cf. Jolly.] Christmas or Christmastide; the feast of the Nativity of our Savior. Anglo-Saxons' name for a two-month midwinter season corresponding to Roman December and January. DROOP: sagging, sinking, bending, hanging down, as fro weakness or lack of support.

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COMMENTS:

sad indeed - perhaps a little gin in the water dish would perk it up - Jabberwocky, 2008-12-15: 11:45:00

It was pining for the fjords of Norway. - Nosila, 2008-12-15: 19:57:00

metrohumanx Finland Finland Finland- The country where I long to be..... - metrohumanx, 2008-12-16: 19:35:00

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Crashkringle

Created by: remistram

Pronunciation: krash-kring-guhl

Sentence: The rum to egg nog ratio was a bit askew which led to many folks ending the evening crashkringling face first on to various snowbanks across the city.

Etymology: crash + kringle (as in kris kringle)

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COMMENTS:

brilliant! - galwaywegian, 2007-12-10: 10:00:00

Indeed it is! - OZZIEBOB, 2007-12-10: 17:42:00

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Fallsamfir

libertybelle

Created by: libertybelle

Pronunciation: fall-some-fur

Sentence: We've tried three different tree stands, placing all the ornaments on one side to balance the weight and even drilling a few branches into the wall but the darned tree keeps falling over; the Christmas tree that Lenny brought home is a genuine fallsam fir.

Etymology: balsam fir; evergreen tree traditionally used as a Christmas Tree + fall

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx Kinda like "Folsam Prison Blues", nay? - metrohumanx, 2008-12-17: 01:06:00

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Crippledickey

Created by: Ismelstar

Pronunciation: [krip-uhld dik-ee]

Sentence: Our little apartment was blessed with high ceilings, meaning the tall, skinny eight-foot Christmas tree we lugged up four flights would be just perfect. Unfortunately, the slender, protruding crown crippledickied as soon as it was topped with our 3 lb star.

Etymology: A mash up of 'crippled', anything that is impaired or flawed and 'dickey', a contraction of doohickey, meaning a gadget, dingus, or thingumbob.

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COMMENTS:

Cute word and story - Nosila, 2008-12-15: 19:55:00

metrohumanx Hahaha. good one. - metrohumanx, 2008-12-17: 01:05:00

Fantastic - OZZIEBOB, 2008-12-17: 04:06:00

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Slantaflaws

mrskellyscl

Created by: mrskellyscl

Pronunciation: slant-a-flaws

Sentence: Finding a tree without slantaflaws, one that is perfect and straight, is hard when so many need slantabras to keep them from falling prostrate. We need to find one with a slantaclause -- one that comes with a guarantee that if our tree gets the slantablahs we can come and exchange it for free.

Etymology: slant: incline or bend from a vertical position + flaw: an imperfection

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-12-10: 01:39:00
Today's definition was suggested by purpleartichokes Thank you purpleartichokes ~ James

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2009-12-17: 00:14:00
Today's definition was suggested by purpleartichokes. Thank you purpleartichokes. ~ James