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'Why can't you get it up?'

DEFINITION: n., A Christmas tree, ornament or caroler that, no matter how it is tied, tethered and tilted, refuses to stay upright. v., To be so full of Christmas cheer that you simply sparkle, twinkle and tip over.

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Verboticisms

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Orneryment

Created by: xirtam

Pronunciation: awr-nuh-ree-muh nt

Sentence: Sometimes you just don't want to deal with those orneryments. First you can't find the hooks, then the loop that the hooks attach to come out. Once you find the perfect spot, it's too heavy for the branch.

Etymology: Ornery: stubborn. + Ornament: an accessory, article, or detail used to beautify the appearance of something to which it is added or of which it is a part.

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Cheerlapidated

Created by: emdeejay

Pronunciation: cheer lappy dated

Sentence: Try as they might, Jenny and James could not get the old tree to stand upright. It had seen them through many a festive season, but it was time to retire the cheerlapidated old thing.

Etymology: Cheer: as in, Christmas Cheer. Delapidated: run down, worn out, etc.

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COMMENTS:

Beauty Newk. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-12-17: 04:07:00

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Treerectiledysfunction

Created by: purpleartichokes

Pronunciation: tree-rek-tile-dis-funk-shun

Sentence: The large crash we heard in the middle of the night could only mean one of two things - either Rudolph had tripped over the satellite dish, or our Scotch Pine suffered from treerectiledysfunction.

Etymology: a tree in need of Viagra

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COMMENTS:

Good one, Purps! I tried to go down this path, but found it too difficult! Flaccid Navidad to you! - OZZIEBOB, 2007-12-10: 04:56:00

Thank you, Ozzie. Same to you! Er... maybe not. - purpleartichokes, 2007-12-10: 07:03:00

ho ho ho - Jabberwocky, 2007-12-10: 11:48:00

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Decoranot

Created by: jajsr

Pronunciation: Deck-or-not

Sentence: No matter how sturdy their tree was, Jim's favorite Christmas ornament was a decoranot. It weighed five pounds and would always make his tree lean to the right.

Etymology: "Decora" from decorate and "Not"

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Ornapisa

Korinne

Created by: Korinne

Pronunciation: Orna-pee-sa

Sentence: Helen was frustrated because the normally upright tree ornaments now looked like ornapisas.

Etymology: Ornaments + Leaning Tower of Pisa

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Embellishbent

Created by: porsche

Pronunciation: em/bell/ish/bent

Sentence: The decorations on our tree always look like embellishbents.

Etymology: embellishment + bent

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Pisaster

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: peez as ter

Sentence: Brad and Kate's first Christmas together as a married couple had been one misfortune after another. It apparently is better to remove the turkey innards before stuffing the bird. Who knew eggnog was made with raw eggs? Pet poodles should not eat fresh mistletoe. Plus Brad had picked out a spindly Christmas Tree which leaned and wobbled under the weight of its decorations. It was a Pisaster Pine, decorated with bows of folly, fa la la la la la, la la la la! It was unfirgiveable, needleless to say. Kate got busy and tried to hide its flaws with tinsel and garlands, but there was no hope of making it a stately evergreen. It was a Tannenbum! When both sets of parents arrived for Christmas dinner, Kate & Brad were surprised not to be criticized for their coniferous conundrum. Brad's gruffy Dad said the only thing to do in this case, was to put some Viagra in the tree water to keep it upright. Apparently his bark was worse than his bite!

Etymology: Pisa (The leaning Tower of) & Disaster (a state of extreme (usually irremediable) ruin and misfortune "His policies were a disaster";an event resulting in great loss and misfortune)

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COMMENTS:

Love the reference! - emdeejay, 2008-12-15: 02:52:00

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Duglistfir

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: dug list fur

Sentence: The town fathers had ordered a large evergreen to be planted in the main square, so that it may be decorated each Christmas Season as the "First Tree". A huge Douglas Fir had been imported from the West and although healthy and full, it had a definite lean to it. They nicknamed it the DuglistFir. At first people laughed at the Leaning Tree, but miraculously on Christmas Eve it had straightened out and stood erect. The people were amazed until they realized that this change was inevitable. The town in question was not called Viagra Falls for nothing!

Etymology: Dug (created by digging); List (lean or tilt to one side) & Fir (any of various evergreen trees of the genus Abies; chiefly of upland areas, popular as a Christmas Tree)and word play on Douglas Fir (tall evergreen timber tree of western North America having resinous wood and short needles)

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Tiltitis

Created by: mamamia

Pronunciation: til-ti-tis

Sentence: After countless attempts to get the xmas tree to stand upright, Kevin then realized he had been sold a tree that suffered from tiltitis.

Etymology: tilt-derived from the word tilt(having its original meaning) and itis usually you can find at the end of certain medical conditions.

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COMMENTS:

Damn, i hope this makes it to the b! - mamamia, 2008-12-15: 19:36:00

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Tannenbombed

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: tah-nuh n-bomd

Sentence: Jerry could not remember the words to "Oh Cristmas Tree" because he was completely tannenbombed.

Etymology: Tannenbaum (Christmas Tree) + bombed (completely intoxicated; drunk)

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-12-10: 01:39:00
Today's definition was suggested by purpleartichokes Thank you purpleartichokes ~ James

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2009-12-17: 00:14:00
Today's definition was suggested by purpleartichokes. Thank you purpleartichokes. ~ James