Verboticisms

Created by: Tigger

Pronunciation: /slahn'-tuh-kawzd/

Sentence: The Christmas tree was hopelessly slantacaused, looking like it was about to fallalalala, but we soon had bigger problems to worry about when Uncle Frank suddenly swooned, hiccupped, and dropped like a missletoe, cracking his Eggnoggin on the mantel.

Etymology: slant - at an oblique angle; aslant (from Middle English, slenten) + Santa-claus (from Dutch, Sinterklaas) + cause[d] - the reason for a condition or result (from Latin, causa)

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COMMENTS:

Perhaps Uncle Frank, after the knock on his 'eggnoggin' will get mental blocks for Christmas! Good word and, as always, thorough etymology! - OZZIEBOB, 2007-12-10: 05:06:00

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Created by: Maxine

Pronunciation: 'kris mes

Sentence: Look at that tree. What a Christmess! Say, you're not looking too well either. Better take a break, or you might Christmess before you know it.

Etymology: Christ + mess, as in "Christ, what a mess." Christmas, as in "The relatives are over and the kids are crazy. Christ, what a mess."

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: peez as ter

Sentence: Brad and Kate's first Christmas together as a married couple had been one misfortune after another. It apparently is better to remove the turkey innards before stuffing the bird. Who knew eggnog was made with raw eggs? Pet poodles should not eat fresh mistletoe. Plus Brad had picked out a spindly Christmas Tree which leaned and wobbled under the weight of its decorations. It was a Pisaster Pine, decorated with bows of folly, fa la la la la la, la la la la! It was unfirgiveable, needleless to say. Kate got busy and tried to hide its flaws with tinsel and garlands, but there was no hope of making it a stately evergreen. It was a Tannenbum! When both sets of parents arrived for Christmas dinner, Kate & Brad were surprised not to be criticized for their coniferous conundrum. Brad's gruffy Dad said the only thing to do in this case, was to put some Viagra in the tree water to keep it upright. Apparently his bark was worse than his bite!

Etymology: Pisa (The leaning Tower of) & Disaster (a state of extreme (usually irremediable) ruin and misfortune "His policies were a disaster";an event resulting in great loss and misfortune)

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COMMENTS:

Love the reference! - emdeejay, 2008-12-15: 02:52:00

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Created by: logarithm

Pronunciation: tIlt-tIn-sEl

Sentence: Our Christmas tree last year was a tiltinsel that we jokingly called it a gay Christmas tree for it just wouldn't stand up straight.

Etymology: 1) Tilt: to lean on one side or in one direction; be or become inclined or slanted. 2) Tinsel: a glittering material with a metallic appearance that is produced in strips, sheets, or the like and used for its decorative effect, esp. at Christmas.

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Created by: Ransom

Pronunciation: kris-ma-SKYOO

Sentence: After countless hours of tilting and turning, Stan was still unable to break the tree's christmaskew appearance.

Etymology: Christmas + askew

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: nee dil vy ag ra

Sentence: When Dick brought the scraggly Christmas Tree home, he knew as soon as he brought it in the house that it was not as straight and bushy as it had looked in the tree lot. He also knew he'd never hear the end of it from his wife,Carol, who criticized him for bringing such a crooked tree home. "What kind of a conifer do you call that, Dick? It's like the Leaning Tower of Pisa." "It's a new breed of fir called Needleviagra. One little blue pill in the water and it will soon be the lovely erect tree you wanted!"

Etymology: Needle (the "leaves" on a coniferous tree;to goad or prooke) & Viagra (Male virility drug)

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Created by: libertybelle

Pronunciation: fall-some-fur

Sentence: We've tried three different tree stands, placing all the ornaments on one side to balance the weight and even drilling a few branches into the wall but the darned tree keeps falling over; the Christmas tree that Lenny brought home is a genuine fallsam fir.

Etymology: balsam fir; evergreen tree traditionally used as a Christmas Tree + fall

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COMMENTS:

Kinda like "Folsam Prison Blues", nay? - metrohumanx, 2008-12-17: 01:06:00

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Created by: abrakadeborah

Pronunciation: Lean-er-flop

Sentence: To mush eggnog is not a good thing when you're trying to decorate a meshed up Chrishmash tree. Shusie tried to tell Joshiff that tree was unstable...When all of a sudden it crashed down on the table! In frustration,Joshiff tied it to the TV and said, "Aw,Shusie that leanerflop Chrishmash tree has gotten the besh of me,it's time for more eggnog my shwee-tee...I'll jush lean over to trim the tree."

Etymology: Lean; To bend or slant away from the vertical. Flop;To fall or lie down heavily and noisily, To move about loosely or limply

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Created by: xirtam

Pronunciation: awr-nuh-ree-muh nt

Sentence: Sometimes you just don't want to deal with those orneryments. First you can't find the hooks, then the loop that the hooks attach to come out. Once you find the perfect spot, it's too heavy for the branch.

Etymology: Ornery: stubborn. + Ornament: an accessory, article, or detail used to beautify the appearance of something to which it is added or of which it is a part.

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Created by: gemmgemms

Pronunciation: shi-mer-ing-da-rawp

Sentence: That man is quite the shimmeringdrop at the moment, he's had so much booze he's liable to flop like a Christmas pancake.

Etymology: shimmering:out of focus ofr sparkly + drop:to fall

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