Verboticisms

Created by: weareallbeautiful

Pronunciation: ah-n-tee-w-urk-ay-d

Sentence: Bill always carried his antiwork aid in order to avoid having to actually work at the office.

Etymology: anti+work+aid

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Created by: protothor

Pronunciation: fillusion

Sentence: This fillusion is working very well; no one even expects I'm not doing anything.

Etymology: From 'file' and 'illusion', anything that gives an observer the idea that you're preoccupied.

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Created by: jesster

Pronunciation: Ass-id-you-plicity

Sentence: While Neville's constant assiduplicity never fooled the people that actually accomplished things, management was completely taken in. He was promoted so frequently that his failures never caught up to him, and soon was in charge of the entire department.

Etymology: assiduous (involved in often constant activity )+ duplicity (the inclination or practice of misleading others through lies or trickery)

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: fyl loo zhun

Sentence: He was the Great Pretender in our office. Sadly, because he was a male, he got away with it for way longer than any female would even dare try. Yes, Seymour Dolittle, was a fileusion. He would stalk the halls carrying a file folder and pretend to "do his rounds" with nothing more than what turned out to be a pizza place menu and and a bus schedule in his file folder. He fooled the senior management for over 5 years (the ladies in the company twigged on after a year or two, but had nowhere to lodge their concerns). When the cuts came, no one could salvage Seymour, as he worked for no one, did not report to anyone and could never successfully explain his presence in the hallowed halls. Luckily for him, he worked long enough to collect a great pension, unemployment insurance and a tasty severance for all his hard-worked time. Nice work if you can get it...and he wasn't even a CEO of anything!

Etymology: File (a set of related records (either written or electronic) kept together) & Illusion (an erroneous mental representation; the act of deluding; deception by creating illusory ideas; an illusory feat; considered magical by naive observers)

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: sha man ila

Sentence: Steve was the shamanila at the office. Most of his 8 hour shift was devoted to avoiding work. He had carried around his faithful manila folder daily trying to look busy. For 8 years he had fooled everyone. Until the day he got his new manager, Liz. She asked him to write out his job description. How in the world was he going to turn his one sentence actual duties (Carries around a file folder.) into a whole page or two of action verbs and activities?

Etymology: Sham (a person who makes deceitful pretenses;something that is a counterfeit; not what it seems to be) & Manila (a strong paper or thin cardboard with a smooth light brown finish made from e.g. Manila hemp & Shaman (one who practices sorcery)

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Created by: LunaC

Pronunciation: sham-o-flaw-ge

Sentence: The new employee furiously types an email to his friend as shamoflauge in case his boss walks by.

Etymology: sham + camoflauge

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Created by: CharlieB

Pronunciation: ex-sell-usion

Sentence: You might think Bob is working hard on his spreadsheets. But they're not real. It's an excellusion.

Etymology: Excel (data spread sheets) + illusion (a false impression of reality)

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: fig men day shun

Sentence: As a long time civil servant in the federal Department of the Obscure and Forgotten Files, Roger was the King of the Toadies. He spent his entire workday carrying around a file folder which was labelled S.M.A.R.T. It looked very official and proved to the innocent bystander or visitor that Roger was a man with a special mission and purpose in his work. In fact the S.M.A.R.T. File was a figmendation. It usually contained a crossword puzzle or scratch & win cards, which Roger would spend his days at work playing. His co-workers thought that the S.M.A.R.T. stood for Segregated Modules Actualizing Relative Theory. In fact, the S.M.A.R.T. acronym actually stood for See Me Avoiding Real Toil. Yes, Roger was also known by his more popular nickname: The SmartFile Dodger!

Etymology: figment (a contrived or fantastic idea, i.e: a figment of the imagination) & mendacious (intentionally untrue;lying)

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COMMENTS:

Did Riger work at the Texas Blog Suppository? Ya crack me up, Nose! - metrohumanx, 2008-08-06: 16:37:00

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Created by: artr

Pronunciation: pôrtˈfōnēˌō

Sentence: Gerry has all the correct business props, the pinstripe suit, the proper tie, the Blackberry. He is never seen without his portfolio. The truth; the suit is a cheap knock-off; the tie, a clip-on; Blackberry, a much too expensive cell phone and the portfolio, a portfonio that holds nothing more than his lunch.

Etymology: portfolio (a large, thin, flat case for loose sheets of paper such as drawings or maps) + phony (not genuine; fraudulent)

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Created by: mweinmann

Pronunciation: port - pfon - eeeooo

Sentence: Robert held tight to his large portfonio as he passed his manager's office. He really had nothing to do but he nicely played the part of a person who had millions of things to do and people to see.

Etymology: Portfolio - A collection of papers and accomplishment and another word for notebook. + phony (not real).

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