Vote for the best verboticism.
DEFINITION: n. A computer programmer who corrects software problems by bugging the users, rather than debugging the software. v. To pinpoint the blame for any defects in a product, especially a software product which you have created, on "illogical" end-users.
Verboticisms
Click on each verboticism to read the sentences created by the Verbotomy writers, and to see your voting options...
You have two votes. Click on the words to read the details, then vote your favorite.
Pogrommer
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: poe grom mer
Sentence: Gerd the Nerd, King of the Keys, WiFi Art Thou was on his usual grumpy morning rounds. It was always demeaning for a man of his superior intellect and obvious supreme being status to have to help the peons in data entry sort their miniscule problems. And so he conducted his morning pogrommer act, successfully designed to terrify and cower. But when he deigned to enter the murky waters of the call centre, he was blinded by the beauty of the end-user. She had long gold plaits and looked so helpless and vulnerable, so he went gently on her. He found himself thinking of her all day and dreamed that night that his Big Fat Geek Wedding would soon be a reality.
Etymology: Pogrom (organized persecution of an ethnic group, in this case, blonde end-users) & Programmer (a person who designs and writes and tests computer programs)
Blamebomb
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: blāmbäm
Sentence: When Jessica emailed a complaint about software developed by her company's software department, someone appeared at her cubicle almost immediately. After a couple of terse questions, he blamebombed her and huffed his way back to wherever it is these people hide out.
Etymology: blame (assign responsibility for a fault or wrong) + bomb (attack)
Technoway
Created by: Mustang
Pronunciation: tek-no-way
Sentence: The office staff all called Hubert the tech 'technoway' for the way he tried to dismiss just about every service call by saying 'no way is this a computer error, it's operator error'.
Etymology: blend of technician and the phrase 'no way'
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COMMENTS:
Nice combo! - artr, 2009-06-26: 10:58:00
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Dissinformation
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: disinfərmāshən
Sentence: Lawrence is quite sure of his programming skills. When something doesn’t work the way he expects, he is preemptively sure that it is caused by user error. He has been known to spread dissinformation, belittling anyone who would dare question his skills.
Etymology: diss (act or speak in a disrespectful way toward)+ misinformation (false or inaccurate information, esp. that which is deliberately intended to deceive)
Computerpogrommer
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: com pew ter po grom mer
Sentence: Java a minute to hear about the Computerpogrommer in our office? His name is Seymour Fawltz and his Modem Operandii is to belittle you in front of your peers and Excel at making you feel like an idiot about your inferior computer skills. It was by sheer chance that someone found out he had entered the local Click&Drag Queen Contest, under the name Ana Log Macintosh, a Domainatrix. Now he knows we know his secret, so his bark is not worse than his byte. We found his Encryptionite!
Etymology: Computer Progammer & Pogrom (organized persecution of an ethnic group (in this case, non-Geeks)
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COMMENTS:
LOL! A great creation. - splendiction, 2009-06-26: 22:52:00
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Mistech
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: mis tek
Sentence: Lech, our mistech, mistook a mistake that Missy would make. He would make her shake and quake, about her mistake, even when his take of her mistake was a flake. He could wreck the heck on her neck, if he we didn't keep our mistech in check.
Etymology: Mistake (error) & Tech (a technician who is highly proficient and enthusiastic about some technical field (especially computing)
Techsuppose
Created by: mrskellyscl
Pronunciation: tek-sup-pose
Sentence: Jean hated to call Techsuppose. Not only would it take half the day to reach someone, but the smarmy voice on the other end of the phone assumed that she was an imbecile and asked the same stupid questions, "Is it plugged in?" "Did you restart it?" Eventually, she discovered that someone neglected to use the "Mother-May-I" command during set-up and now she'd have to spend the rest of the afternoon downloading various patches, drivers, upgrades and fixes. Another day sacrificed to the tyrannical techgods.
Etymology: (play on techsupport) Suppose: to believe, especially on uncertain or tentative grounds; to consider as probable or likely
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COMMENTS:
So true! - splendiction, 2009-06-26: 22:53:00
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Softwarrior
Created by: Tigger
Pronunciation: /sawft-WOR-ee-er/
Sentence: Bert, the department's IT Specialist, was a fanatical softwarrior, who would attack any of the mere users who dared to question the quality of their software. He fancied himself a sort of cyber-paladin, defender of the virtuous programmers who constructed such intricate code. Of course, Bert was sure that he could have joined their ranks, and that the brotherhood of programmers would welcome him with open arms, but he believed that his calling was here, at the front lines, keeping the unappreciative and discontented mobs of peasants... er, users, at bay.
Etymology: Software - the programs used to direct the operation of a computer (back-formation from the word 'hardware' as applied to computer equipment) + Warrior - one who is engaged aggressively or energetically in an activity, cause, or conflict (from Old North French, werreieur "one who wages war")
Progcastigator
Created by: Jabberwocky
Pronunciation: prog/cass/ti/gay/tor
Sentence: Many software developers are progcastigators who put off reworking their programs and instead berate users.
Etymology: programmer + castigate (reprimand, berate) + procrastinator
Comments:
Today's definition was suggested by purpleartichokes. Thank you purpleartichokes. ~ James
Today's definition was suggested by purpleartichokes. Thank you purpleartichokes. ~ James
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