Verboticisms

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: kom pew ter po grom er

Sentence: Ivan the Terrible was the scourge of the Company because he ran his own personal little empire in the IT Dept. He terrorized the quasi-technical employees and carried out a reign of terror as a computerpogromer to the masses, making them fear turning on their computers each morning. Like all despots though, he was overthrown when the company outsourced his job overseas, in an effort to save money and lives.

Etymology: Computer Programmer (a person who designs and writes and tests computer programs)& Pogrom (organized persecution of an ethnic group (especially Jews)

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Created by: artr

Pronunciation: disinfərmāshən

Sentence: Lawrence is quite sure of his programming skills. When something doesn’t work the way he expects, he is preemptively sure that it is caused by user error. He has been known to spread dissinformation, belittling anyone who would dare question his skills.

Etymology: diss (act or speak in a disrespectful way toward)+ misinformation (false or inaccurate information, esp. that which is deliberately intended to deceive)

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Created by: arrrteest

Pronunciation: pro-grim-ist

Sentence: Victor the Progrimist was scheduled to do his rounds on the floor at 10:00 a.m. on Tuesdays. The employees all held a meeting to discuss what problems they had beforehand so they would be prepared for his sarcastic and abusive ways and attitude. They even took a poll to see who's problem would probably attract the most ire and ridicule from him. Every once in a while they would concoct a fake IT problem just to see him react if there was not many issues to discuss.

Etymology: Program + grim +ist

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Created by: TJayzz

Pronunciation: Krit-ee-komp-a-doss

Sentence: The criticompados was insistent that the blame lay with me, but I was sure I was not in the wrong, and he knew it!! He tried the same trick on my colleague only last week.

Etymology: Criti(Critisize,blame) comp(computer) dos(Disk operating system)

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Created by: splendiction

Pronunciation: soft ware spesh ial ass

Sentence: Hank's new income tax software’s many glitches prompted him to call technical support. However, the softwarespecialass maintained his program was flawless. He suggested Hank give the software another try while completing another random task, such as juggling oranges or counting sheep.

Etymology: From software specialist and ass.

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Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: prog/cass/ti/gay/tor

Sentence: Many software developers are progcastigators who put off reworking their programs and instead berate users.

Etymology: programmer + castigate (reprimand, berate) + procrastinator

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Created by: tmcg5625

Pronunciation:

Sentence:

Etymology:

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Created by: artr

Pronunciation: nätit

Sentence: Whenever a computer problem is exposed Wendel sings out "Notit" much like a kid at the start of a game of tag. Of course when he said "it", he meant IT. Though he has never actually created a single usable document, spreadsheet or database, he just knows that any problem that pops up is the fault of the peons that work for his company. If only he could keep these knuckleheads from monkeying with his network... He would express his disdain in an e-mail if he could spell it.

Etymology: not (used with an auxiliary verb or “be” to form the negative) + it (pronoun [third person singular]) IT (Information Technology)

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Created by: bookowl

Pronunciation: vur/tu/al/tur/cay/shun

Sentence: I had a virtualtercation with IT today.

Etymology: virtual + altercation

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Created by: mrskellyscl

Pronunciation: tek-sup-pose

Sentence: Jean hated to call Techsuppose. Not only would it take half the day to reach someone, but the smarmy voice on the other end of the phone assumed that she was an imbecile and asked the same stupid questions, "Is it plugged in?" "Did you restart it?" Eventually, she discovered that someone neglected to use the "Mother-May-I" command during set-up and now she'd have to spend the rest of the afternoon downloading various patches, drivers, upgrades and fixes. Another day sacrificed to the tyrannical techgods.

Etymology: (play on techsupport) Suppose: to believe, especially on uncertain or tentative grounds; to consider as probable or likely

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COMMENTS:

So true! - splendiction, 2009-06-26: 22:53:00

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