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'Computer programmers do not make mistakes.'

DEFINITION: n. A computer programmer who corrects software problems by bugging the users, rather than debugging the software. v. To pinpoint the blame for any defects in a product, especially a software product which you have created, on "illogical" end-users.

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Verboticisms

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Debugaboo

Created by: rombus

Pronunciation: dee - bug - ah - boo

Sentence: It was an exasperating debugaboo that the employees found themselves in. The front end application sometimes connected and sometimes did not. The programmer kept saying that the users were just not concentrating or had a bad work attitude when they could not connect.

Etymology: debug, bugaboo (source of concern, trickster or prankster)

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COMMENTS:

Dee Bootiful word! - Nosila, 2009-06-26: 12:41:00

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Geekjerk

petaj

Created by: petaj

Pronunciation: geek-jerk - with contempt in the intonation

Sentence: That geekjerk needs to get some user experience training and some empathy before he starts work on his next program. Next time he comes near me he might be on the end of a knee jerk reaction.

Etymology: geek (member of the IT crowd) + jerk (someone who behaves badly)

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COMMENTS:

petaj OOps a day late with this one. - petaj, 2008-05-15: 03:46:00

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Displaim

Created by: stache

Pronunciation: dĭ-splām'

Sentence: "Clearly user error." Gaylord concluded. "You simply can't correctly interface with the connection-oriented data access arrangement..." "Don't displaim me," Marta interrupted, "I only hit 'start' and the thing locked up."

Etymology: displacement, psychological defense mechanism that transfers affect or reaction from the original object to some more acceptable one; display, to output (data) on a CRT or other screen, or, in non-computer usage, to reveal or betray; aim, to intend or direct for a particular effect or purpose.

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Softwarrior

Created by: Tigger

Pronunciation: /sawft-WOR-ee-er/

Sentence: Bert, the department's IT Specialist, was a fanatical softwarrior, who would attack any of the mere users who dared to question the quality of their software. He fancied himself a sort of cyber-paladin, defender of the virtuous programmers who constructed such intricate code. Of course, Bert was sure that he could have joined their ranks, and that the brotherhood of programmers would welcome him with open arms, but he believed that his calling was here, at the front lines, keeping the unappreciative and discontented mobs of peasants... er, users, at bay.

Etymology: Software - the programs used to direct the operation of a computer (back-formation from the word 'hardware' as applied to computer equipment) + Warrior - one who is engaged aggressively or energetically in an activity, cause, or conflict (from Old North French, werreieur "one who wages war")

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Proctechnalgia

Created by: OZZIEBOB

Pronunciation: PROK-tek-nel-juh

Sentence: Bob, aka Cranston, was a technillogicrat whose proctechnalgia was the bane of all IT end-users.

Etymology: Blend of TECHNOLOGY, PROgram & PROCTALGIA:a pain in the ass.

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COMMENTS:

Blend of TECHNOLOGY & PROCTALGIA:a pain in the ass. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-05-14: 17:41:00

Oops! - OZZIEBOB, 2008-05-14: 17:42:00

funny - you must have put this in very late - Jabberwocky, 2008-05-14: 21:04:00

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Techsuppose

mrskellyscl

Created by: mrskellyscl

Pronunciation: tek-sup-pose

Sentence: Jean hated to call Techsuppose. Not only would it take half the day to reach someone, but the smarmy voice on the other end of the phone assumed that she was an imbecile and asked the same stupid questions, "Is it plugged in?" "Did you restart it?" Eventually, she discovered that someone neglected to use the "Mother-May-I" command during set-up and now she'd have to spend the rest of the afternoon downloading various patches, drivers, upgrades and fixes. Another day sacrificed to the tyrannical techgods.

Etymology: (play on techsupport) Suppose: to believe, especially on uncertain or tentative grounds; to consider as probable or likely

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COMMENTS:

So true! - splendiction, 2009-06-26: 22:53:00

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Buggle

Created by: jrogan

Pronunciation: bug-gull

Sentence: Jonathan was a real buggle and depended on user feedback to make sure all his software worked as expected... Whatever they said he'd feed it back to them as user errors.

Etymology: bug + gle

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Softwarespecialass

Created by: splendiction

Pronunciation: soft ware spesh ial ass

Sentence: Hank's new income tax software’s many glitches prompted him to call technical support. However, the softwarespecialass maintained his program was flawless. He suggested Hank give the software another try while completing another random task, such as juggling oranges or counting sheep.

Etymology: From software specialist and ass.

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Custoculpate

Created by: rebelvin

Pronunciation: CUSTOmer+CULPable+ATE

Sentence: His first reaction to any reported application problem is to custoculpate, not wanting to think the code could be incorrect, even when that has proven to be the case over and over.

Etymology: CUSTOmer+CULPable+ATE

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Itsk

mrskellyscl

Created by: mrskellyscl

Pronunciation: I-tisk

Sentence: When Susan's screen went black she dreaded having to call the crabby ITsk guy but she was stymied. The all-knowing geek strolled into the office with his short sleeved shirt, coffee cup and smarmy attitude, looked at the wall where someone had accdentally kicked out the plug. He stood there with the plug in his hand, tsking, then made a huge show of plugging it in. "Please check the plug before you call next time," he snarled, and wafted out of the office.

Etymology: IT: pronounced I - T is the acronym for Informational Technologist + Tsk: sucking sound used to express disappointment or sympathy.

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2008-05-14: 00:03:02
Today's definition was suggested by purpleartichokes. Thank you purpleartichokes. ~ James

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2009-06-26: 00:00:00
Today's definition was suggested by purpleartichokes. Thank you purpleartichokes. ~ James

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