Verboticisms

Created by: Tigger

Pronunciation: /EE-gad-van-tij/

Sentence: When Vinny, the apprentice electrician, saw his boss grab his left arm, fall to the floor at his feet and then pass out, he dropped the wires he was holding and grabbed for the wall to steady himself. But he was working in front of the circuit breaker box, and instead of grabbing the wall, he accidentally switched on the main power feed. "Egad!" exclaimed Vinny, as his boss' body convulsed from the electricity, and he quickly switched the power off again. But it turned out to be an egadvantage, since the jolt restarted his boss' heart, saving his life.

Etymology: Egad - an expletive or mild oath (euphemistic corruption of the oath, "by God") + Advantage - a beneficial factor or combination of factors (from Old French, avantage "to come before")

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COMMENTS:

Good word, 'Shocking' story! - TJayzz, 2008-05-02: 16:28:00

Thank God Vinny did not conduct himself well that day!!Is this a shorts story?? - Nosila, 2008-05-03: 22:22:00

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Created by: Nuwanda

Pronunciation: sare-in-dope-it-ee

Sentence: In a bold move of serendopity, Kevin decided to let his freak flag fly and confessed all his neuroses and foibles on the first date. Little did he know that Suzanne was the Bob Vila of relationships and saw Kevin as the next exciting installment of "This Old Spouse."

Etymology: Serendipity combined with dope

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Created by: TJayzz

Pronunciation: Blun-der-bow-nus

Sentence: If it hadn't been for Jack's stupid mistake of signing up for the cookery class instead of woodwork, then he would never have met his fiance Becky, it certainly had turned out to be a blunderbonus.

Etymology: Blunder(mistake) + Bonus(unexpected pleasant surprise) = Blunderbonus

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Created by: metrohumanx

Pronunciation: ben-ih-FLUKKED-up

Sentence: Their boss was a floozy- Todd really expected… To get some "OT" but was firmly rejected. Although he believed through the ranks he’d move up- He’s unemployed now ‘cause he BENEFLUKEDUP. Boasting about how she was more than willin’... His workmates line up now to take penicillin.

Etymology: BENEfits+FLUKE+f*ckeD UP= BENEFLUKEDUP.....BENEFIT: advantage, useful aid, help, a service provided by an employer in addition to wages or salary; Middle English, from Anglo-French benfet, from Latin bene factum, from neuter of bene factus, past participle of bene facere.....FLUKE: a stroke of luck, an accidentally successful stroke at billiards, pool, or social climbing; Middle English floke, fluke, from Old English flōc; akin to Old English flōh chip, Old High German flah smooth, Greek plax flat surface, and probably to Old English flōr floor.....F*ck up: to ruin or spoil especially through stupidity or carelessness, to act foolishly or stupidly, to blunder; origin uncertain.

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COMMENTS:

Your poems are epic, like played in 3D, who knew one could rhyme about the joys of VD? - Nosila, 2009-06-12: 08:53:00

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Created by: DazzleMcFazzle

Pronunciation: Idy-o-vin-dicitee

Sentence: Charlie having finished his game of tennis, went back to the changing rooms and looked on the bench where he left his clothes. He got changed, and walked out. It was not until he reached into his pocket for his train ticket that he had put someone elses trousers on. But having found a wallet with not only an all day ticket but a huge wad of cash felt a sense of idiovindicity wash over him.

Etymology: n. Stupidity which through its positive result, justifies it having been committed with no remorse.

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Created by: OZZIEBOB

Pronunciation: foh-PAR-uh-gon

Sentence: As the flash of the photographer's camera went off, amid what seemed to me to be an eternity of applause, my heart pounded with the joy of success. Years of hard work had finally paid off; my book had won the neighourhood annual literary award. However as I came forward to accept the thousand dollar prize, it was quickly becoming apparent to me that, to my horror and utter disbelief, almost certainly, a "great" dust-cover disaster was unfolding right before my eyes: the printers had put my name, by mistake, on another author's work. It was a fauxparagon, but I been down or my luck for far too long, so why shouldn't I have a bit of dumb luck too; and, anyway, I needed the money more than he did.

Etymology: FAUX: false, a blunder; PARAGON:ideal instance; a perfect model,perfect example.

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COMMENTS:

oops! - Jabberwocky, 2008-05-02: 14:07:00

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Created by: Rutilus

Pronunciation: cat-as-ter-if-ik

Sentence: Geoff was happily contemplating the reason he'd got here.Refusing to accept his line manager's bullying and getting fired had given him time to study and re-train. Here was a man better qualified, better off and much happier. Oh how he chuckled at an event he had seen as a disaster had in fact been completely catasterrific for him.

Etymology: Catastrophic - dramatic negative effect; Terrific - extremely good, wonerful

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Created by: mrskellyscl

Pronunciation: sna-fluke

Sentence: What started out as a screw-up turned into a snafluke for Terrell because if he hadn't been searching for the Dave Matthews tickets he misplaced, he wouldn't have found the winning lottery ticket in his coat pocket.

Etymology: snafu: an acronym used by soldiers during WWII "situation normal all **up (fouled up in polite company) to refer to a situation caused by confusion or an embarassing mistake + fluke: an accidental stroke of good luck

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COMMENTS:

Excellent! - Mustang, 2009-06-12: 22:47:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: win kor rekt

Sentence: Tony always played the same lottery numbers every week...a combination of birthdates of his family. For 20 years he won nothing. One day he had to rewrite his lottery board because the old one would not go through the reader. He accidentally transposed one birthdate from an 12 to a 21 and lo and behold that group he selected won full prize of several millions...he got the wincorrect winning numbers afterall!

Etymology: Win (victory;attain something) & Incorrect (not correct; not in conformity with fact or truth)

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Created by: artr

Pronunciation: sna-froo-ish-uhn

Sentence: Jerry was just another starving artist. After years of trying, he finally found a Gallery Director who was willing to look at his watercolors. His wish to be successful came to snafruition when he got caught in a downpour on his way to the gallery. The Director proclaimed his half-blurred paintings as genius and immediately scheduled a showing.

Etymology: snafu (mistake) + fruition (attainment of anything desired; realization; accomplishment)

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