Verboticisms

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: win kor rekt

Sentence: Tony always played the same lottery numbers every week...a combination of birthdates of his family. For 20 years he won nothing. One day he had to rewrite his lottery board because the old one would not go through the reader. He accidentally transposed one birthdate from an 12 to a 21 and lo and behold that group he selected won full prize of several millions...he got the wincorrect winning numbers afterall!

Etymology: Win (victory;attain something) & Incorrect (not correct; not in conformity with fact or truth)

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Created by: didsbury

Pronunciation:

Sentence: When I dinged my boss's car in the lot I thought I was fired for sure but the whole situation was totally clutzverted. It turns out she wanted an excuse to claim insurance for some damage done in a not-so-secret DUI incident last month.

Etymology: Derived from the German 'klootzverteignung'. First written usage in 1538 in the description of a mid-summer festival where the death of 250 Bavarian villagers created a flourishing tourist trade at the site of the event.

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COMMENTS:

Great word. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-05-04: 06:49:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: faw lee soop pare ee or

Sentence: FiFi had been a trained ballet dancer who had fallen on hard times and was forced to dance in a cabaret show to earn her keep. Instead of leotards and tulle tutu skirts, she wore skimpy theatrical costumes, often with paste gems and feathers or other items strategically placed on them. For the Victorian times of 1870 she lived in, these costumes were considered very scandalous. All that changed one night when the thin straps of her loose dress burdened with the heavy weight of 10 pounds of fake cherries broke free while she was in motion. Her audience was allowed to gaze upon her totally nude body for several minutes before she realized what had happened. Fifi's wardrobe malfunction became the follysuperior of her career and instantly took her from the back of the chorus line to become the featured performer. The stage manager, smelling a fortune to be made, arranged for her to do this every performance, so appreciative was the audience's response. Yes, gentlemen for miles around came to see her lose her cherries every night and that's how the striptease of burlesque was born.

Etymology: folly ( foolish or senseless behavior, the trait or quality of acting stupidly or rashly, a stupid mistake)& superior (of high or superior quality or performance)& rhymes with Folies Bergères (Paris Music Hall which featured bawdy song and dance reviews between 1890-1920, including burlesque and nearly nude dances and stripteases, and later, Josephine Baker)

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COMMENTS:

Love the story. Hilarious! - Tigger, 2008-05-02: 21:57:00

Top story. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-05-04: 06:52:00

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Created by: alicat

Pronunciation: work-el

Sentence: I wurkelled when I crashed my mom's car. Now the insurance is replacing the car with a new one. Did I do that?

Etymology: Win + Urkel (as in Steve Urkel from Family Matters) or Work + Urkel

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: blun der full

Sentence: When Wendy started her new job at James & Sons, she was anxious to learn quickly and move up the ladder. Fireworks started on her first day when she gave the office boy, Jimmy, heck for delivering the wrong mail. The second day, she berated him for spilling coffee on her new suit. The third day, she nagged him to bring in sandwiches for the staff. By day 4 he and she had developed a toxic, intense relationship. On Friday afternoon, he asked her out on a date. She was about to refuse when she felt she had spoken to him in a rude manner all week. Her treatment of him turned out to be blunderful instead. Apparently, Jimmy was one of the owner's sons and loved her feistiness and he and Wendy are now happily married and she is Exec.VP!

Etymology: Blunder (error,embarrassing mistake) & Wonderful ( extraordinarily good; used especially as intensifiers)

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Created by: Rutilus

Pronunciation: cat-as-ter-if-ik

Sentence: Geoff was happily contemplating the reason he'd got here.Refusing to accept his line manager's bullying and getting fired had given him time to study and re-train. Here was a man better qualified, better off and much happier. Oh how he chuckled at an event he had seen as a disaster had in fact been completely catasterrific for him.

Etymology: Catastrophic - dramatic negative effect; Terrific - extremely good, wonerful

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Created by: Tigger

Pronunciation: /EE-gad-van-tij/

Sentence: When Vinny, the apprentice electrician, saw his boss grab his left arm, fall to the floor at his feet and then pass out, he dropped the wires he was holding and grabbed for the wall to steady himself. But he was working in front of the circuit breaker box, and instead of grabbing the wall, he accidentally switched on the main power feed. "Egad!" exclaimed Vinny, as his boss' body convulsed from the electricity, and he quickly switched the power off again. But it turned out to be an egadvantage, since the jolt restarted his boss' heart, saving his life.

Etymology: Egad - an expletive or mild oath (euphemistic corruption of the oath, "by God") + Advantage - a beneficial factor or combination of factors (from Old French, avantage "to come before")

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COMMENTS:

Good word, 'Shocking' story! - TJayzz, 2008-05-02: 16:28:00

Thank God Vinny did not conduct himself well that day!!Is this a shorts story?? - Nosila, 2008-05-03: 22:22:00

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Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: sair-ehn-DUM-eh-tye

Sentence: Once again Filbert was the accidental 'victim' of serendumbity, having made what for anyone else would be a major faux pas but for him ended up with his dream date.

Etymology: Blend of 'serendipity' (finding unexpected treasure or joy) and 'dumb' (stupid - unintelligent)

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Created by: TJayzz

Pronunciation: Blun-der-bow-nus

Sentence: If it hadn't been for Jack's stupid mistake of signing up for the cookery class instead of woodwork, then he would never have met his fiance Becky, it certainly had turned out to be a blunderbonus.

Etymology: Blunder(mistake) + Bonus(unexpected pleasant surprise) = Blunderbonus

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Created by: metrohumanx

Pronunciation: ben-ih-FLUKKED-up

Sentence: Their boss was a floozy- Todd really expected… To get some "OT" but was firmly rejected. Although he believed through the ranks he’d move up- He’s unemployed now ‘cause he BENEFLUKEDUP. Boasting about how she was more than willin’... His workmates line up now to take penicillin.

Etymology: BENEfits+FLUKE+f*ckeD UP= BENEFLUKEDUP.....BENEFIT: advantage, useful aid, help, a service provided by an employer in addition to wages or salary; Middle English, from Anglo-French benfet, from Latin bene factum, from neuter of bene factus, past participle of bene facere.....FLUKE: a stroke of luck, an accidentally successful stroke at billiards, pool, or social climbing; Middle English floke, fluke, from Old English flōc; akin to Old English flōh chip, Old High German flah smooth, Greek plax flat surface, and probably to Old English flōr floor.....F*ck up: to ruin or spoil especially through stupidity or carelessness, to act foolishly or stupidly, to blunder; origin uncertain.

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COMMENTS:

Your poems are epic, like played in 3D, who knew one could rhyme about the joys of VD? - Nosila, 2009-06-12: 08:53:00

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