Vote for the best verboticism.

'I thought you'd want a head on a platter'

DEFINITION: n. A punishment which does not fit crime. v. To assign a punishment which is bizarrely inappropriate, and seems totally unrelated to the crime which has been committed.

Create | Read

Verboticisms

Click on each verboticism to read the sentences created by the Verbotomy writers, and to see your voting options...

You have two votes. Click on the words to read the details, then vote your favorite.

Funishment

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: fənishmənt

Sentence: When the starlet got caught for the fifth time her funishment was very severe. She was sentenced to 30 days in frizzon — that’s right, she was locked up in a place that didn’t have proper hair products. She could do nothing but throw on a scarf, dark sunglasses and steer clear of places where paparazzi might catch a glimpse.

Etymology: fun (enjoyment, amusement, or lighthearted pleasure) + punishment (the infliction or imposition of a penalty as retribution for an offense)

----------------------------
COMMENTS:

was just about to write that down :) - galwaywegian, 2010-09-17: 08:16:00

----------------------------

Vote For | Comments and Points

Convictimization

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: kon vik tim ize ashun

Sentence: It was pre-ordained. His name was Rob and by gosh, that is what he did for a living. He also wrote very bad checks. When he was caught and sentenced to 25 years in the pokey, he thought he had fallen prey to convictimization. He was incarcerated at Sing Sing, where contrary to the name, they did not sing, often or well. Warden Gordon Borden thought it would be ironic if Rob wrote the new Prison Newsletter, since he was so good at writing (bad checks). Rob called this literary marvel, "Sentences" and worked hard at it to make it informative and entertaining. He carried regular features, such as a column on advice to the lovelorn..."In-Mates" with such pertinent features as "Are you suffering from Penal Dysfunction?";The Daily Horrorscope ("Your life has settled into predictable routine but just wait, the new screw in Cell Block 4 has his eye on you. Prepare for excitement."); a singles column "Cell-ABC" and recipes from the prison kitchen, "The Garden of Pleadin'" ...for Chili CON carney...take 500 pounds of ground meat, throw in 18 cups of saltpeter,...etc. He also added news items that affected his readership: "Care and feeding of your pet Cockroach"; and he used the digital camera to get candid snaps of daily life column, "I've been framed". Rob became a publishing ty-con and made the most of his pun-nishment!

Etymology: Convict (a person serving a sentence in a jail or prison; a person who has been convicted of a criminal offence; find or declare guilty) & Victimization (adversity resulting from being made a victim; an act that exploits or victimizes someone (treats them unfairly))

----------------------------
COMMENTS:

written with conviction!! - galwaywegian, 2009-03-06: 05:56:00

Top Notch Job creating this 'con' job and 'con' verbotomy! - silveryaspen, 2009-03-06: 19:15:00

So funny!!! - kateinkorea, 2009-03-08: 10:30:00

----------------------------

Vote For | Comments and Points

Dracomicarceration

metrohumanx

Created by: metrohumanx

Pronunciation: dra-COMIC-are-sur-AY-shun (DRACOMICARCERATE)

Sentence: Judge Mentill-Case was not elected. He was a political apointee who wielded his gavel with wild abandon. Ever since his pet pug was flattened by a Lexus, he delighted in enforcing the hamlet's no-cell-phone driving ordinance. His punishment for a first offender was removal of all glass on the vehicle. Second offense entailed driving with snow chains on all four tires for a year. Third offense was DRACOMICARCERATION-confinement to a Volkswagon Beetle with the doors welded shut. The Judge's career ended when he crashed into a Starbuck's while texting.

Etymology: DRAconic+COMIc+inCARCERATION= DRACOMICARCRATION.....DRACONIC:of, relating to, or characteristic of Draco or the severe code of laws held to have been framed by him; Latin Dracon-, Draco, from Greek Drakōn Draco (Athenian lawgiver).....COMIC: causing laughter or amusement, funny, of, relating to, or marked by comedy; Latin comicus, from Greek kōmikos, from kōmos revel(1576).....INCARCERATE: to subject to confinement, to put in prison, to punish; Latin incarceratus, past participle of incarcerare, from in- + carcer prison Date: 1560,

----------------------------
COMMENTS:

Here come da Judge...cute story. It took a latte to get rid of that judge! - Nosila, 2009-03-06: 18:42:00

Great triple word play! - silveryaspen, 2009-03-06: 19:49:00

metrohumanx Thanks, kids! - metrohumanx, 2009-03-06: 20:46:00

metrohumanx THE BEARS' "CAR CAUGHT FIRE" WINS ALBUM OF THE YEAR AT THE CINCINNATI ENTERTAINMENT AWARDS. On November 26, 2001, just 4 years after being inducted into CEA's Hall of Fame, the Bears won Album Of The Year for Car Caught Fire. Rob Fetters and Bob Nyswonger accepted the award shortly after Rob's solo performance of the Bears' "As You Are". - metrohumanx, 2009-03-06: 22:39:00

metrohumanx www.thebearsmusic.com - metrohumanx, 2009-03-06: 22:40:00

metrohumanx LIVE IT or LIVE WITH IT! - metrohumanx, 2009-03-06: 23:55:00

metrohumanx She was sick and tired of country life. A little country home, A little country folk, Made her blood run cold. Now her mother pines her heart away, Looking for her child in the big black smoke, In the big black smoke. Frailest, purest girl the world has seen, According to her Ma, according to her Pa, And everybody said, That she knew no sin and did no wrong, Till she walked the streets of the big black smoke, Of the big black smoke. Well, she slept in caffs and coffee bars and bowling alleys, And every penny she had Was spent on purple hearts and cigarettes. She took all her pretty coloured clothes, And ran away from home And the boy next door, For a boy named Joe. And he took her money for the rent And tried to drag her down in the big black smoke, In the big black smoke. In the big black smoke. In the big black smoke. - metrohumanx, 2009-03-07: 00:39:00

metrohumanx Sorry about that. I got carried away. - metrohumanx, 2009-03-07: 00:41:00

metrohumanx I'd like to thank the JAMES GANG for providing a very entertaining outlet for the mad ramblings of very talented people.. - metrohumanx, 2009-03-07: 00:48:00

Hear, Hear, metro! It's great to tell people you are in a gang! Respect! - Nosila, 2009-03-08: 22:26:00

The creams rises to the TOP :) You're so creative Metrohumanx! - abrakadeborah, 2009-03-25: 14:05:00

----------------------------

Vote For | Comments and Points

Ninjustice

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: nin-juhs-tis

Sentence: Despite the very public nature of his crimes the executive was given a punishment that seemed almost nonexistent. The stealth nature of the judgment caused many to declare it ninjustice. Some, thinking he must have been intoxicated, accused the judge of ginjustice.

Etymology: ninja (a member of a feudal Japanese society of mercenary agents, highly trained in martial arts and stealth) + injustice (violation of the rights of others; unjust or unfair action or treatment)

Vote For | Comments and Points

Adjudipocrisy

Created by: cdoussett

Pronunciation:

Sentence:

Etymology:

Vote For | Comments and Points

Ojsimpsoned

Created by: whazat29

Pronunciation: o.j. simpsoned

Sentence: o my gosh, I was so o.j. simpsoned for dating becky's mom.

Etymology: o.j. simpson

Vote For | Comments and Points

Nonsentence

Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: nohn sen tensss

Sentence: the judge told the pervert that he would have to wash miss jones' underwear for a year. complete and utter nonsentence

Etymology: sentence, nonsense

Vote For | Comments and Points

Fauxtence

Created by: abrakadeborah

Pronunciation: foe-tense

Sentence: Mr. Ponzi Fakkier, your fauxtence requires that you have a staff of thirty people to make sure you abide by the rules of the court, to maintain a lifestyle of luxury...via our tax payers.

Etymology: Faux - Not genuine or real; being an imitation of the genuine article. Tense; taken in part from the word Sentence - Court judgment, especially a judicial decision of the punishment to be inflicted on one adjudged guilty.

Vote For | Comments and Points

Funishment

Created by: Ratty

Pronunciation: f-UN-ish-ment

Sentence: Barry's drunk mother (who had a high well-paid job in court) simply had to do something as a punishment after Barry chopped both her arms off. When Barry got a final sentence of doing community service for the most ridiculously generous rich old lady, his mother realized her rather regretful punishment was in fact a funishment.

Etymology: fun, punishment

Vote For | Comments and Points

Perverdict

Created by: rombus

Pronunciation: pur - vur - dikt

Sentence: Judge Malloy handed down a perverdict in the swindling case against Margorie Vandenspit. After stealing millions of dollars from unsuspecting victims of phishing schemes; stealing their identities and sending them fishheads in the mail, Marjorie got off with community service. If this wasn't a case of perverdict justice, then I have lost more than my sense of humor.

Etymology: preverted and verdict -- perverted: distorted or deviating from what is usually considered to be normal or correct -- verdict: A decision on an issue of fact in a civil or criminal case or an inquest

Vote For | Comments and Points

Show All or More...

 

Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2009-03-06: 00:01:01
Today's definition was suggested by metrohumanx. Thank you metrohumanx. ~ James

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-09-17: 00:22:00
Today's definition was suggested by metrohumanx. Thank you metrohumanx. ~ James