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'How many trees did you kill to print that?'

DEFINITION: v., To compulsively print out paper copies of all electronic files. n., A printing fetish common among paper pushers who suffer from a paranoid fear that their digital files are disintegrating on their hard drives.

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Verboticisms

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Substantialiate

Created by: serickson

Pronunciation: sub stan shull yate

Sentence: "But it will get lost in the ethers of cyberspace, which is only a fantasy world after all," grumbled Kyle when his boss told him he'd have to pay for the paper he used if he kept on substantialating his email messages. "At least this way I have something I can hold on to. Email messages aren't really real - You don't even have to be a magician to make them disappear. Look at this," he continued, nodding towards the stack of papers that were bowing him down," I can touch these...pant...pant...pant."

Etymology: substantial - solid, heavy, and real. substantiate - to verify that something is indeed something.

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Microhardoffensive

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: my kro hard off fen siff

Sentence: When she was in school, long ago, Millie learned that computers (or machines that did your talking and thinking for you) were something out of science fiction. Trying to not feel like a dinosaur on a space station, she had dutifully taken all the computer courses her company had offered. She managed most programs with good efficiency, but one aspect dogged her progress in the company. It was noted that she always printed off absolutely everything that she received or sent over the computer. In a paperless society, she had managed to accrue more paper files than anyone else. It was said she had a microhardoffensive disorder...she had a compulsion to print out everything, not trusting the memory or hard drive of the systems her company used. It was a touch of irony that when the BIG CRASH came and wiped out all primary and back-up systems, that the management came to Millie to get her paper files in order to rebuild and salvage their records!

Etymology: Microhard (as opposed to Microsoft,the computer giant) & Hard (not easy; requiring great physical or mental effort to accomplish or comprehend or endure)also Hard (as in hard copy...a printed version of something on screen) & offensive (unpleasant or disgusting especially to the senses)

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Printrat

Created by: aiiden

Pronunciation: prynt-raht

Sentence: Rachel printrat's so much crap mail, her office files take up less space.

Etymology: print-rat

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Papyrulimia

Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: puh/pahy/ruhlim/ee/uh

Sentence: With unlimited reams of corporate paper, Jenny slowly descended the long, lonely path of papyrulimia where she continuously feed the photocopy machine as much paper as it could swallow and with great satisfaction watched it spew out copy after copy after copy.

Etymology: PAPYRULIMIA - noun - from PAPYRUS (paper) + BULIMIA (an eating disorder characterized by frequent episodes of grossly excessive food intake followed by self-induced vomiting)

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COMMENTS:

very funny - Jabberwocky, 2008-10-06: 10:19:00

zxvasdf Thanks for the mental picture. I can't look at a printer the same way again... Good one. - zxvasdf, 2008-10-06: 13:48:00

Good one! - TJayzz, 2008-10-06: 16:56:00

Terrific blend - OZZIEBOB, 2008-10-07: 04:49:00

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Dittolusion

Created by: Tigger

Pronunciation: dĭt-ō-lōō'-zhən

Sentence: Marlene's desk simply could not handle the weight -- it wasn't built to handle that type of load. Due to her technophrenia, and her compulsion to actually handle these apparently invisible files everyone kept telling her were stored inside her computer, she would print out every single e-mail and add it to the growing stacks, forming a 'literal fort' inside her cubicle. It's obvious that she's suffering from a dittolusion, and her desk finally paid the price.

Etymology: ditto (a duplicate or copy) + delusion (a false belief in spite of invalidating evidence).

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COMMENTS:

Trees actually cringe when Marlene walks by, and printers consider her Satan's avatar. - Tigger, 2007-11-07: 22:31:00

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Pulpgulp

thegoatisbad

Created by: thegoatisbad

Pronunciation: pulp-gulp

Sentence: Few coworkers suspected that Kimberly and Zinnia were waging a silent war against each other, but suspicions were raised after Zinnia spearheaded an effort to reduce "pulpgulp" and Kimberly responded by insisting that all correspondence with her desk occur via facsimile.

Etymology: Pulp (mushy mix of paper fibers and water) + Gulp (to consume quickly)

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Printcess

Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: print/zess

Sentence: Sally was a printcess obsessed with printing out everything written to her in hopes of finding secret messages from her Prints Charming.

Etymology: print + princess + obsess

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COMMENTS:

very funny - got my vote! - remistram, 2007-11-07: 09:10:00

Good word; hilarious sentence! - OZZIEBOB, 2007-11-07: 16:36:00

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Brinkjet

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: brink jet

Sentence: Sally was on the brinkjet of rainforest annihilation while printing off every online e-mail and report in her company. Thanks to her boss who caught her in time, the forests in North and South AMerica can now rest easier.

Etymology: Brink (the limit beyond which something happens or changes) & Inkjet (type of computer printing that creates a digital image by propelling droplets of ink onto paper)

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Compulsaprintia

Created by: thebaron

Pronunciation: com-pul-sa-prin-tia

Sentence: It had some years now since Erin had suffered from compulsaprintia, as her bulging file cabinets proved.

Etymology: compulsa (compulsive) (print)

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Copyiousness

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: kop pee us ness

Sentence: Mimi O'Graf drove her boss, Savya Treez, crazy because she printed off everything that came through her e-mail...even things sent to her by mistake. She was suffering from a bad case of copyiousness and to try and curb her fetish, Savya denied her request for another filing cabinet. Mimi already had four of them and she'd only worked there a year. "Mimi", she said, "You are going to have to go through all those files and purge the unimportant. The whole point of us going paperless was to have less paper around!" Said Mimi, "But, Boss, if I have to waste time reading all the old e-mails, I will get behind in printing off the new ones!" "That's it, Mimi!" said Savya, "I am calling the producers of "Intervention" and "Hoarders" to get you some help!!!"

Etymology: Copy (a reproduction of a written record) & Copiousness (the property of a more than adequate quantity or supply)

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-11-07: 00:01:00
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram! ~ James'

remistram - 2007-11-07: 09:09:00
I worked with someone like this!

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-03-04: 00:16:00
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James

Petrikreink - 2020-03-04: 13:47:00

Svetikreink - 2020-03-04: 19:15:00

Genkareink - 2020-03-04: 20:08:00