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'I've been working out on this ab machine every day for a week'

DEFINITION: n. The creepy pounds that sneak onto your waist even though you've been exercising and watching what you eat. v. To exercise rigorously, diet fastidiously, and yet still gain weight.

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Cowisthenics

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: kou-uhs-then-iks

Sentence: Roger goes to the gym on a regular basis. What he calls a workout rarely involves much work. His cowisthenics usually involve hoofing it to the closest vending machine for an "energy" drink and "health" bar. On a really energetic visit he might be moooved to join a short basketball game, take a quick shower and herd for the donut shop on his way home to replenish all those expended carbs.

Etymology: cow (a mature bovine) + calisthenics (gymnastic exercises designed to develop physical health and vigor)

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Hexercise

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: hek sir syes

Sentence: Although he exercised regularly and ate properly, Tim felt that someone had cursed him. This hexercise prevented his losing any weight. He was mystified, as he had cut back his donuts to just the one dozen per day. How much more sacrificing could he be expected to do???

Etymology: Hex (cast a spell over someone or something; put a hex on someone or something) & Exercise (the activity of exerting your muscles in various ways to keep fit)

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Blubbles

Created by: DragonRider428

Pronunciation: rhymes with bubbles/bubbles with an l

Sentence: I keep exercising virgorously but these blubbes keep appearing!

Etymology: derived from the word "bubbles" - refers to the pounds gained even when exercising and dieting.

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Stealthfood

Created by: Banky

Pronunciation: stellth-food

Sentence: The scale gave a small muffled electronic scream when Andy brought his full weight to bear. He was just about done with trying to shape up; two weeks of treadmill and proper diet had led to a 5-pound gain. Unfortunately, Andy had been mistaken in his meal-selecting logic, and all of the sensible meals he had recently consumed were in fact stealthfoods. The 8-oz portion of fish the night before, for example, had come from an Eastern Stoned Lardwrasse. After a lazy afternoon on the reef smoking reefer, the fish had consumed a bag of Funyuns, 3 Big Macs, 2 orders of fries, a chocolate shake, and a carton of Haagen Daazs. Leaving his friends laughing in his enormous wake, calling him names like "Marlin Brando", the lardwrasse had groggily stumbled into a waiting net, his certain doom, and another veneer of fat on Andy's barely denim-constrained buttocks.

Etymology: stealth + food; ala healthfood

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COMMENTS:

What a witty twist to come up with an eat-it-self-to-death fish that packs weight on humans! Topped off with a meaning full great pun! Excellent Won! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-19: 10:06:00

Now I know why I almost bought that bag of Bloomin' Onion Crisps at the store tonight. Bastard Banky! (Sorry James!) Nice word! - purpleartichokes, 2008-03-19: 20:55:00

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Gutchels

Created by: ShadeTanner

Pronunciation: gut-chills

Sentence: If you have gutchels, see a health professional because there's most likely a medical concern causing this.

Etymology:

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Expansercise

Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: ex/pan/ser/cise

Sentence: No matter how much he worked out, he tended to eat more and more, which unfortunately, just exacerbated the problem and turned the two activities into a futile expansercise for his body.

Etymology: EXPANSERCISE - from EXPANSE (something that is spread out over a relatively large area) + EXERCISE (activity that requires physical exertion)

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Itsfatsyouate

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: Itz - fats - yoo - ayt

Sentence: When Melvin saw how much 'girth' he'd gained in recent months he muttered to himself while staring, mouth agape, at his reflection in the mirror, "I know itsfatsyouate, you big blob."

Etymology: Play on the word infatuate. Infers being infatuated with rich, fatty foods.

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Carbohydeweight

Created by: CanadianAndyCapp

Pronunciation: Kar-bow-high-d-way-t

Sentence: The common misconception that sugar is at the root of all obesity problems hides the true fact that the increased use of fats in processed foods and lack of proper exercise to remove volume overeating poundage has led to people developing self-delusional "Jekyll and Hyde" attitudes about their diet/lifestyle, and weight in a form of "Carbohydeweight"

Etymology: Carbohydrate - An organic compound. / High - Elevated. / Hide - concealed. / Hyde - See Jekyll and Hyde. / Weight - Gravitational displacement (see also blubber)

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COMMENTS:

In every way .... outstandingly excellent! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-19: 10:20:00

great word - Jabberwocky, 2008-03-19: 11:38:00

Good word. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-03-20: 05:12:00

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Phenomaprocurity

Created by: yelloweyes

Pronunciation: fe-naw-maw-pro-cure-it-ee

Sentence: Shelly has been gaining weight recently. She said it was because she is experiencing phenomaprocurity, but I do not believe she is actually dieting or exercising.

Etymology: Phenoma - from phenomenon (fact or situation with a questionable/unknown cause) Procurity - from procure (to obtain).

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Antilean

Created by: catgrin

Pronunciation: ant-il-yuh n (sounds like "ant" + "million" -"m")

Sentence: (n) No amount of hours at the gym could stop the antileans from taking oven my waistline. (v) By 35, most women antilean, diet and exercise simply cannot return them to their size fours.

Etymology: A simple compound of "anti" and "lean" using a softer vowel sounds and slightly shifted emphasis to give the sound of tiny hordes attacking.

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2008-03-19: 00:01:00
Today's definition was suggested by silveryaspen. Thank you silveryaspen. ~ James

Mustang - 2008-03-19: 00:49:00
Infatsyouate

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-05-26: 00:00:00
Today's definition was suggested by silveryaspen. Thank you silveryaspen. ~ James

hombwedleMi - 2018-05-26: 08:39:00
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hombwedleMi - 2018-05-26: 11:22:00
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