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'Don't leave me out here! I'm not dead yet!'

DEFINITION: v., To put an unwanted houseplant, especially a seasonal or gift plant like a Poinsettia or Easter Lily, outdoors in hopes that it will die. n., An unwanted houseplant which has been left to nature.

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Verboticisms

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Planthateshun

Created by: lumina

Pronunciation: plant/hate/shun

Sentence: It was that time of year again. The tree was out in front of the house waiting for the garbage truck to take it to the "big forest in the sky." The trash bin was overflowing with Christmas wrappings and turkey bones. And up at the front door was the annual line of abandoned Poinsettas. Yes, they had "served their purpose" and now were nothing but planthateshuns. It's a sad life...

Etymology: plant + hate + shun

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COMMENTS:

So sad... - Nosila, 2008-10-13: 20:16:00

Maybe we should start a floraphange for them?? - Nosila, 2008-10-13: 20:17:00

I know...it's a short and sad life. Floraphanage? Great idea! I'd surely adopt! :) - lumina, 2008-10-13: 22:22:00

metrohumanx Hilarious, with a smattering of sad truth.....Oh, floraphanage- i just got it. :) - metrohumanx, 2008-10-14: 03:14:00

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Leafoutside

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: leef owt syde

Sentence: Like clockwork, Flora's neighbours saw the same phenomena after each season...abandoned plants on her back porch. Poinsettia's after Christmas, Lillies after Easter, Mums after Thanksgiving, etc. Apparently ignorant on any kind of plant care knowledge,Flora would leafoutside any of these poor hothouse-raised, sensitive showy plants to fend for themselves. Inevitably, snow, frost, critters and lack of water sealed their fate. Those neighbours were very worried that one of these days, Flora might get pregnant and have a baby. If she ran true to form, they were afraid they might find the baby abandoned on the porch because he had outgrown the cute stage and was way too much work and bother. They speculated that if this was not the child's fate, he should be named "Leaf the Lucky"!

Etymology: Leaf (the main organ of photosynthesis and transpiration in higher plants) & Outside (Not inside, in the elements) & play on leave outside (abandon something to the Great Outdoors)

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Arborwinism

MissRabbit

Created by: MissRabbit

Pronunciation: Arr-bore-win-ism

Sentence: A guilty arborwinist, Meg got so depressed watching her holiday flowers slowly shrivel away that she finally abandoned them to the elements.

Etymology: A mix of arbor (relating to trees/plants) and Darwinism (survival of the fittest)

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx Shundashrub, also. - metrohumanx, 2008-10-13: 01:45:00

metrohumanx Wabbits are not kind to shwubs. - metrohumanx, 2008-10-13: 01:45:00

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Dieffenbachiassassination

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: dee-fuh n-bah-kee-uh-uh-sas-uh-neyt

Sentence: Debbie was never very good with house plants. She once killed a cactus that her mother-in-law gave her that had survived years of neglect. When her friend gave her a lovely house plant she planted it out front knowing full well that she was committing Dieffenbachiassassination. "It's better that it return to nature than in my kitchen and end up in a trash can" she was heard to say.

Etymology: Dieffenbachia(tropical flowering plants in the family Araceae noted for their patterned leaves) assassination (to destroy or harm treacherously and viciously)

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Aspidostracize

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: ass pid oss tra size

Sentence: Marvin's Mother-In-Law, Lily, finally went home after her 3 week visit. It was the longest 3 weeks of Marvin's life, as his Mother-in-law was only to eager to point out Marvin's short-comings in fixing up their new place. His wife, Fern, thought it was sweet that her mother had given them a lovely houseplant as a house-warming gift. The Aspidistra was attractive with healthy green foliage, but it constantly reminded Marvin of Lily, so he decided to aspidostracize it in the hopes it would die of neglect outside. It not only survived on the front porch, it thrived and luckily the climate was suitable for it year round. Pretty soon the entire front flower bed was populated with it's baby plants, which also flourished. But every time Marvin came near the plants, he felt they were watching him. They had pistils and they knew how to use them and they were planning to plant him outside soon, too.

Etymology: Aspidistra (evergreen perennial with large handsome basal leaves; grown primarily as a foliage houseplant...also known as Cast Iron Plant,Barroom Plant) & Ostracize (shun;banish;expel from a community or group)

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Floracide

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: FLOR-eh-side

Sentence: In a seemingly heartless attempt to commit floracide on an unwanted hideous tropical houseplant she had gotten as a gift, Gracie left it outdoors on the patio during the harshest part of the winter.

Etymology: 'Flora' (Plants considered as a group) with the suffix 'cide' (from Latin meaning “killer,” “act of killing,” used in the formation of compound words)

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Ostraponicaw

metrohumanx

Created by: metrohumanx

Pronunciation: oss-trip-ONIC-awww

Sentence: Herb really loved Lilly, but he only tolerated her infatuation with plants. Lilly had a necrarium in the living room in which nothing greater than fungi would grow. In the kitchen, spiderplants threatened Herb's every move. Forest litter and detritus was accumulating under the end tables. Herb, not being especially gifted at conflict resolution, decided to convert one houseplant each night into an OSTRAPONICAW. He gave secret thanks to the Frost Giants who visited the doorstep and turned each rare succulent into a slimy mass of burst cells which no plant food spike could ever hope to revive. Poor Lilly. AWWWWWWWWWWW

Etymology: OSTRAcise+hydroPONIC+AWWWW= OSTRAPONICAW .....OSTRACISE:a method of temporary banishment without trial or special accusation ; exclusion by general consent from common privileges or social acceptance.....HYDROPONICS:the growing, however unsucessfully, of plants in nutrient solutions without an inert medium (as soil) to provide mechanical support.....AWWW: 21st century exclamation intended to express dismay or mock sympathy, often uttered at the demise of an unloved decorative companion.

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx The BEST source for planty stuff: http://www.jlhudsonseeds.net/ - metrohumanx, 2008-10-13: 01:38:00

metrohumanx OSTRAPONICS: The Not growing of plants on any viable medium. Plants which thrive on abuse are particularly suited to this merhod of floracide. - metrohumanx, 2008-10-13: 01:42:00

how cruel - Jabberwocky, 2008-10-13: 14:08:00

metrohumanx Now that i look at OSTRAPONICAW, it sounds like an endangered sub-tropical bird. Oh well- there are no provisions for "taking back" a word, i guess. - metrohumanx, 2008-10-14: 02:51:00

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Herbieuthanasia

Created by: worldkitsch

Pronunciation: erbe-u-than-asia

Sentence: By the time it was April and that stupid poinsetta hadn't died, I was forced to committ herbieuthanasia.

Etymology:

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Exfloriate

Created by: amcfarlane

Pronunciation:

Sentence: Jack decided to exfloriate the grim-looking rubber plant his great aunt had purchased him for a house-warming present.

Etymology:

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Overstalk

Created by: astorey

Pronunciation: oh-ver-stalk

Sentence: Melissa liked her plants and generally tried to take good care of them. But when she travelled or forgot to water them, only the ones who could switch to desert mode would survive. The rest became, in Melissa's mind, overstalk, and her neglect moved from benign to willful, as she started planning what the overstalk's pot would hold next.

Etymology: Alteration of "overstock" to incorporate stalk, as in a plant stem. Also intended to imply that you are over the stalk.

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COMMENTS:

cute...Maybe she should stalk to her plants to get them growing... - Nosila, 2008-10-13: 20:21:00

metrohumanx hahaha- "desert mode"....how optimistically deniable. Good one! - metrohumanx, 2008-10-14: 03:11:00

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-11-14: 00:01:00
Today's definition was suggested by yellowbird. Thank you yellowbird! ~ James'

purpleartichokes - 2007-11-14: 04:19:00
How ironic, I just did this yesterday with some cilantro that developed a wicked case of spider mites. Now I get to feel the guilt allll over again.

Jabberwocky - 2007-11-14: 15:22:00
I got a phone call from cilantro - he said "Save me purple - it's not too late"

purpleartichokes - 2007-11-14: 18:32:00
I hate you Jabber. Here come the nightmares... "I'm freeeeezing!"

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-11-14: 23:02:00
The cilantro is just the tip of the iceberg! I heard that Purple iced her entire crop artichokes, which she was **trying** to grow hydroponically in her basement. That is until she saw her electricity bill quadruple. Just think of all those poor baby artichokes... It's sad, until you think -- Purple probably would have ate them anyways. ~ James

mplsbohemian - 2007-11-14: 23:08:00
Tip of the iceberg *lettuce*, you mean.

purpleartichokes - 2007-11-15: 06:54:00
Now I'm all choked up... guess I'll start eating more meat.

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-03-10: 00:08:00
Today's definition was suggested by yellowbird. Thank you yellowbird. ~ James

artr artr - 2010-03-10: 12:20:00
A friend suggested a very scary thought. She says that the verbotomists should get together and have a \"meet & greet\".

mrskellyscl mrskellyscl - 2010-03-10: 12:46:00
Sounds good. We could have a convention in Verbena, Alabama