Vote for the best verboticism.
DEFINITION: v. To deny one's accomplishments, or minimize one's abilities in order to obtain a job. n. A resume, or list of qualifications, which has been disembellished and disemboweled to meet extremely low job requirements.
Verboticisms
Click on each verboticism to read the sentences created by the Verbotomy writers, and to see your voting options...
You have two votes. Click on the words to read the details, then vote your favorite.
Resumenial
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: rezəmēnēəl
Sentence: John had always been fascinated by those guys on the street corner flipping and spinning signs announcing the latest going-out-of-business sale. When his company announced bankruptcy he jumped at the chance to try out for such a job. To do so he had to have his secretary create a resumenial for him, leaving out such details as his MBA and doctorate in finance as well as his years as CEO. The only job experience he listed was part-time dance instructor, a job that helped him get through college some 30 years prior. Unfortunately he was beat out for the job by a former member of The Village People who had a few dance moves of his own.
Etymology: resume (a brief account of a person’s education, qualifications, and previous experience, typically sent with a job application) + menial (work) not requiring much skill and lacking prestige)
Negatiation
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: neg ayt she ay shun
Sentence: In Harris' negatiation attempt get a $10 per hour job at the local fast food place, he had not anticipated being interviewed by someone who knew his real past.
Etymology: Negate (to deny, omit) & Negotiation (bargaining, discussion to come to an agreement)
Quashification
Created by: TJayzz
Pronunciation: Kw-osh-i-fi-kay-shun
Sentence: Having been made redundant from his job at the city stockmarket, Henry had tried for so many jobs that he had lost count. He decided to try quashification and when asked about his previous employment he would tell any future employer that he was nothing more than the tea boy.
Etymology: Quash(prevent from being expressed or becoming public knowledge) + Qualification(a pass of an exam or completion of a course in order to meet the requirements of a certain job) = Quashification
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COMMENTS:
nice blend - Jabberwocky, 2009-02-25: 14:41:00
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Nabobfuscation
Created by: metrohumanx
Pronunciation: nay-BOB-fuss-cay-shun (nabobfuscate)
Sentence: Bob had managed to parlay his fortune into a pittance, and now he had to depend on the good will of others. He NABOBFUSCATED his job applications, and hoped that the people he had abused in the past wouldn't hold it against him. Once the haughty master of an offshore tax haven, he was lucky to wind up working in a gas station.
Etymology: NABOB+OBFUSCATION=NABOBFUSCATION.......NABOB:a person of great wealth or prominence;Hindi navāb & Urdu nawāb, from Arabic nuwwāb, plural of nā'ib governor.....OBFUSCATE: to be evasive, unclear, or confusing,to darken,to make obscure; Late Latin obfuscatus, past participle of obfuscare, from Latin ob- in the way + fuscus dark brown.
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COMMENTS:
Excellent! - Mustang, 2009-02-25: 19:38:00
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Applitruncation
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: ap-li-truhng-key-shuhn
Sentence: After years of foreclosing loans on his neighbors Jim was reticent to mention his previous experience at job interviews. The needed paperwork often involves a fair amount of applitruncation.
Etymology: application (a written or spoken request or appeal for employment) + truncation (to cut short)
Crapplication
Created by: galwaywegian
Pronunciation: krap lik ay shun
Sentence: His crapplication for the tobacco glossed over many of his achievements and qualifications, including one particularly high office which he held and where he had gleaned some experience which may have been of benefit when selling cigars,
Etymology: application crap
Disconjobulation
Created by: Mustang
Pronunciation: dis-con-job-yu-LAY-shun
Sentence: With no possible chance to find another job in his highly specialized field, Horace found it necessary to apply for jobs he once considered beneath himself and found a little disconjobulation was necessary in order to 'qualify' for such menial positions.
Etymology: A play on the word discombobulation, or discombobulate (To throw into a state of confusion)
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COMMENTS:
I love the 'con-job' in the middle! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-25: 02:15:00
great - Jabberwocky, 2009-02-25: 14:39:00
Love it! - kateinkorea, 2009-02-27: 07:50:00
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Resumaynot
Created by: galwaywegian
Pronunciation: rez you mey noht
Sentence: her resumaynot neglected to mention any of her achievements since high school apart from the mose killing stuff
Etymology: resume may not
Backgroundheck
Created by: splendiction
Pronunciation: back round heck
Sentence: When the supervisor eventually got around to verifying Sato’s resume denials, she’d probably cast it aside, giving him backgroundheck. How could a software specialist ever last fslipping burgers?
Etymology: From backgroundcheck (to verify references and qualifications) and "heck", a scold/verbal punishment.
Dummydown
Created by: silveryaspen
Pronunciation: dumb me down
Sentence: Once upon a time, (for this is how all fairy tales begin) the king exiled Mr. Loang Gone Silver, the bank pirate, to the I'lland country, where he thought his stashed salary millions, awaited him in an off-shore account. King Blackberry, however, had used his magic compupowers to hi-hack the money back! Due to his infamy, Mr. Loang Gone Silver had to change his name, and hide the terrible fact he was once a note-orious bank president, and go looking for a job. His dummydown resume' led him to his new job, as the dumbme, down at the gift shop on the beach, where he became the strawboss and sole-seller of straw shoes and straw hats. Mr. Loang Gone Silver was given the ailias Mr. Long Gone Bigshot.
Etymology: DUMMY, DOWN which is synonymous with DUMB ME DOWN. Dummy - 1) a fake. -2) an offensive term that deliberately insults somebody's intelligence or credulity ( informal insult ). Dumb - of lesser intelligence. Down - at a lower level.
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COMMENTS:
Sometimes he moonlighted as a partner to Mr. BoJangles! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-25: 01:59:00
He said I dance now at every chance in honky tonks for drinks and tips But most the time I spend behind these county bars 'cause I drinks a bit He shook his head, and as he shook his head I heard someone ask him please Mr. Bojangles, Mr. Bojangles Mr. Bojangles, dance.. - silveryaspen, 2009-02-25: 02:01:00
his new job sounds nicer than being a bank president - Jabberwocky, 2009-02-25: 14:43:00
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Comission
Created by: petaj
Pronunciation: com-ISH-un
Sentence: After years of high-powered corporate derringdo Arthur decimated his CV to get a job with no overtime and no stress. It was a sin of comission.
Etymology: commission (employment) + omission (act of leaving something out)
Mcjobimize
Created by: Stevenson0
Pronunciation: Mc/Job/i/mize
Sentence: To be even considered for the position at Dollarama, Joe had to McJobimize his resume leaving everything out that he did since high school.
Etymology: McJobimize - verb - from McJob (a none descript low paying job such as a burger server, or store greeter) + minimize (to represent at the lowest possible amount)
Selfeffacting
Created by: readerwriter
Pronunciation: cellf-eh-fak-ting
Sentence: Downey Outman was so selfeffacting on his resume the Human Resources Manager, Noah Job, could hardly bear (or is it bare?) to read the words printed by hand on the soft double-ply tissues.
Etymology: A play on SELFEFFACING, humble or modest using FACT, knowledge or information based on real occurances
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COMMENTS:
very funny - Jabberwocky, 2009-02-25: 14:41:00
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Curriculumbidet
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: coor rik yu lum bee day
Sentence: His curriculum vitae read more like it had been made into a curriculumbidet...all the most recent events on his resume had been whitewashed and changed as though they never had happened or had not as much impact as one would have thought. When the recruiter asked him what skills he brought to the job of a waiter, Dubya as he was known for short, thought hard and long about it before responding. Okay, 10 seconds. "Well, I am good at taking orders from my Mom, Dad and Wife; I know how to run up a large tab; I can recommend Rice as a staple in any regime;Iraq up tips; I am good at nonsensical banter and if we get real busy, my two burly friends, who speak into their cufflinks, can lend a hand."
Etymology: Rhymes with Curriculum Vitae (a summary of your academic and work history) & Bidet (a basin for washing genitals and anal area)
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COMMENTS:
You are queen of the delightful denouement! His-tor-ically Funny! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-25: 02:11:00
Make that His-story-cally funny! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-25: 02:12:00
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Gentrylevel
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: jentrēlevəl
Sentence: When Prince Gustuv found that the family fortune was not what it once was, it became clear that he would have to find a way to make some money. There are few jobs earmarked for the nobility so it looked he would have to downplay his rank and take a (gasp!) gentrylevel position. The interviewer tried hard to not burst out laughing when he saw "formerly know as Prince" on the resume.
Etymology: gentry (the class of people next below the nobility in position and birth) + level (a height or distance from the ground or another stated or understood base) play on entry-level
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COMMENTS:
superb - Jabberwocky, 2009-02-25: 14:40:00
Very good, and it made me laugh! - kateinkorea, 2009-02-26: 20:11:00
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Downpay
Created by: FreakyDeak
Pronunciation: Down-pay
Sentence:
Etymology: Downplay + pay
Noncomplishments
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: non kom plish ments
Sentence: When Bank Manager Mr. Drysdale applied at the fast food restaurant for a part-time job, his resume was full of noncomplishments. His interest in the job was on account of the fact that he'd lost a lot in his bank retirement savings plan. The Assistant Manager who interviewed him after he deposited his application did not trust his resume. It was a wicket lie he knew, but he could hardly teller the truth. He had worked at a Sperm Bank...
Etymology: Non (negative, not at all) & Accomplishments (achievements, qualifications, abilities acquired by training)
Dummary
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: dum ma ree
Sentence: Jim's resume for the fast fry cook's position was actually a dummary of his career's achievements. After cooking the books at the bank for 30 years, he felt he could cook anything this place served.
Etymology: Dumb (not so smart) & Summary (a resume, brief job/education history;
Disconjobulation
Created by: Mustang
Pronunciation: dis-con-job-yu-LAY-shun
Sentence: With no possible chance to find another job in his highly specialized field, Alexander found it necessary to apply for jobs he once considered beneath himself and found a little disconjobulation was necessary in order to 'qualify' for such menial positions.
Etymology: A play on the word discombobulation, or discombobulate (To throw into a state of confusion)
Warewithdrawal
Created by: kateinkorea
Pronunciation: WARE with DRAW eul
Sentence: After Bob was laid off from his job and he didn’t have the wherewithal to pay his bills, he decided he was too young to retire and needed to get a job. A long time salesman and way overqualified, he found that the wares he had to sell at this point in his life were his lack of credentials rather than his credentials. It became evident that if he worked at it he had the warewithdrawal he needed to undersell his abilities.
Etymology: WARE: an asset or product to sell WHEREWITHAL: means to make something happen NONE: WITHDRAWAL:
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COMMENTS:
terrific - Jabberwocky, 2009-02-25: 14:42:00
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Denyigreat
Created by: Jabberwocky
Pronunciation: dee/ny/I/grate
Sentence: In these tough economic times the only way I could get a job at the local McDonalds was to denyigreat, which was difficult because I am.
Etymology: deny + I + great + denigrate (disparage)
Crapplication
Created by: galwaywegian
Pronunciation: krap lik ay shun
Sentence: He tried to gloss over the error on his crapplication, insisting that Doctor was his first name
Etymology: application, crap
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COMMENTS:
that would be a neat first name - Jabberwocky, 2009-02-25: 14:39:00
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Accomplishmin
Created by: feltcap
Pronunciation: ə-kŏm'plĭsh'mĭn
Sentence: She knew they would take one look at her resume and be worried about the safety of their own jobs. What she needed was an accomplishmin, minimizing her extensive over qualifications, just so should could get in the door.
Etymology: accomplishment - a special skill or ability acquired by training or practice, min - short for minimize, to reduce
Caredaction
Created by: Negatrev
Pronunciation: Cer-re-dak-shun
Sentence: John really needed this menial job, so performed a little caredaction on his resume before submitting it.
Etymology: from Career (An occupation undertaken for a significant period of a person's life and with opportunities for progress.) and redact(Edit (text) for publication.)
Brevsume
Created by: mweinmann
Pronunciation: brev + som + ay
Sentence: Joyce had two versions of her resume ready so that she could qualify for both entry level and professional job openings. Her resume contained years of achievements, awards and education. Her brevsume was much shorter. It began with her illustrious career as a papergirl, progressed to bagging groceries and ended with her stint as a parking lot attendant...
Etymology: Brevity and Resume >> Brevity (The quality of being brief in duration; Succinctness; conciseness) Resume (summary of educational and employment experience)
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COMMENTS:
wonderful verbotomy - Jabberwocky, 2009-02-25: 14:36:00
Very good! - Mustang, 2009-02-25: 21:18:00
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Splinterviewing
Created by: matte76
Pronunciation:
Sentence: Bob was splinterviewing for the fry cook job since there was nothing else available. The 60-year olds' resume had obviously been splinterviewed to increase its' appeal.
Etymology:
Comments:
Verbotomy - 2009-02-25: 00:01:01
Today's definition was suggested by metrohumanx. Thank you metrohumanx. ~ James
Verbotomy - 2010-09-08: 00:01:00
Today's definition was suggested by metrohumanx. Thank you metrohumanx. ~ James