Verboticisms

Created by: petaj

Pronunciation: com-ISH-un

Sentence: After years of high-powered corporate derringdo Arthur decimated his CV to get a job with no overtime and no stress. It was a sin of comission.

Etymology: commission (employment) + omission (act of leaving something out)

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Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: dis-con-job-yu-LAY-shun

Sentence: With no possible chance to find another job in his highly specialized field, Alexander found it necessary to apply for jobs he once considered beneath himself and found a little disconjobulation was necessary in order to 'qualify' for such menial positions.

Etymology: A play on the word discombobulation, or discombobulate (To throw into a state of confusion)

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: dum ma ree

Sentence: Jim's resume for the fast fry cook's position was actually a dummary of his career's achievements. After cooking the books at the bank for 30 years, he felt he could cook anything this place served.

Etymology: Dumb (not so smart) & Summary (a resume, brief job/education history;

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Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: rez you mey noht

Sentence: her resumaynot neglected to mention any of her achievements since high school apart from the mose killing stuff

Etymology: resume may not

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Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: krap lik ay shun

Sentence: His crapplication for the tobacco glossed over many of his achievements and qualifications, including one particularly high office which he held and where he had gleaned some experience which may have been of benefit when selling cigars,

Etymology: application crap

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: coor rik yu lum bee day

Sentence: His curriculum vitae read more like it had been made into a curriculumbidet...all the most recent events on his resume had been whitewashed and changed as though they never had happened or had not as much impact as one would have thought. When the recruiter asked him what skills he brought to the job of a waiter, Dubya as he was known for short, thought hard and long about it before responding. Okay, 10 seconds. "Well, I am good at taking orders from my Mom, Dad and Wife; I know how to run up a large tab; I can recommend Rice as a staple in any regime;Iraq up tips; I am good at nonsensical banter and if we get real busy, my two burly friends, who speak into their cufflinks, can lend a hand."

Etymology: Rhymes with Curriculum Vitae (a summary of your academic and work history) & Bidet (a basin for washing genitals and anal area)

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COMMENTS:

You are queen of the delightful denouement! His-tor-ically Funny! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-25: 02:11:00

Make that His-story-cally funny! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-25: 02:12:00

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Created by: silveryaspen

Pronunciation: dumb me down

Sentence: Once upon a time, (for this is how all fairy tales begin) the king exiled Mr. Loang Gone Silver, the bank pirate, to the I'lland country, where he thought his stashed salary millions, awaited him in an off-shore account. King Blackberry, however, had used his magic compupowers to hi-hack the money back! Due to his infamy, Mr. Loang Gone Silver had to change his name, and hide the terrible fact he was once a note-orious bank president, and go looking for a job. His dummydown resume' led him to his new job, as the dumbme, down at the gift shop on the beach, where he became the strawboss and sole-seller of straw shoes and straw hats. Mr. Loang Gone Silver was given the ailias Mr. Long Gone Bigshot.

Etymology: DUMMY, DOWN which is synonymous with DUMB ME DOWN. Dummy - 1) a fake. -2) an offensive term that deliberately insults somebody's intelligence or credulity ( informal insult ). Dumb - of lesser intelligence. Down - at a lower level.

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COMMENTS:

Sometimes he moonlighted as a partner to Mr. BoJangles! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-25: 01:59:00

He said I dance now at every chance in honky tonks for drinks and tips But most the time I spend behind these county bars 'cause I drinks a bit He shook his head, and as he shook his head I heard someone ask him please Mr. Bojangles, Mr. Bojangles Mr. Bojangles, dance.. - silveryaspen, 2009-02-25: 02:01:00

his new job sounds nicer than being a bank president - Jabberwocky, 2009-02-25: 14:43:00

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Created by: feltcap

Pronunciation: ə-kŏm'plĭsh'mĭn

Sentence: She knew they would take one look at her resume and be worried about the safety of their own jobs. What she needed was an accomplishmin, minimizing her extensive over qualifications, just so should could get in the door.

Etymology: accomplishment - a special skill or ability acquired by training or practice, min - short for minimize, to reduce

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Created by: metrohumanx

Pronunciation: nay-BOB-fuss-cay-shun (nabobfuscate)

Sentence: Bob had managed to parlay his fortune into a pittance, and now he had to depend on the good will of others. He NABOBFUSCATED his job applications, and hoped that the people he had abused in the past wouldn't hold it against him. Once the haughty master of an offshore tax haven, he was lucky to wind up working in a gas station.

Etymology: NABOB+OBFUSCATION=NABOBFUSCATION.......NABOB:a person of great wealth or prominence;Hindi navāb & Urdu nawāb, from Arabic nuwwāb, plural of nā'ib governor.....OBFUSCATE: to be evasive, unclear, or confusing,to darken,to make obscure; Late Latin obfuscatus, past participle of obfuscare, from Latin ob- in the way + fuscus dark brown.

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COMMENTS:

Excellent! - Mustang, 2009-02-25: 19:38:00

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Created by: splendiction

Pronunciation: back round heck

Sentence: When the supervisor eventually got around to verifying Sato’s resume denials, she’d probably cast it aside, giving him backgroundheck. How could a software specialist ever last fslipping burgers?

Etymology: From backgroundcheck (to verify references and qualifications) and "heck", a scold/verbal punishment.

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