Vote for the best verboticism.
DEFINITION: v. To deny one's accomplishments, or minimize one's abilities in order to obtain a job. n. A resume, or list of qualifications, which has been disembellished and disemboweled to meet extremely low job requirements.
Verboticisms
Click on each verboticism to read the sentences created by the Verbotomy writers, and to see your voting options...
You have two votes. Click on the words to read the details, then vote your favorite.
Selfeffacting
Created by: readerwriter
Pronunciation: cellf-eh-fak-ting
Sentence: Downey Outman was so selfeffacting on his resume the Human Resources Manager, Noah Job, could hardly bear (or is it bare?) to read the words printed by hand on the soft double-ply tissues.
Etymology: A play on SELFEFFACING, humble or modest using FACT, knowledge or information based on real occurances
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COMMENTS:
very funny - Jabberwocky, 2009-02-25: 14:41:00
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Applitruncation
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: ap-li-truhng-key-shuhn
Sentence: After years of foreclosing loans on his neighbors Jim was reticent to mention his previous experience at job interviews. The needed paperwork often involves a fair amount of applitruncation.
Etymology: application (a written or spoken request or appeal for employment) + truncation (to cut short)
Mcjobimize
Created by: Stevenson0
Pronunciation: Mc/Job/i/mize
Sentence: To be even considered for the position at Dollarama, Joe had to McJobimize his resume leaving everything out that he did since high school.
Etymology: McJobimize - verb - from McJob (a none descript low paying job such as a burger server, or store greeter) + minimize (to represent at the lowest possible amount)
Splinterviewing
Created by: matte76
Pronunciation:
Sentence: Bob was splinterviewing for the fry cook job since there was nothing else available. The 60-year olds' resume had obviously been splinterviewed to increase its' appeal.
Etymology:
Dummary
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: dum ma ree
Sentence: Jim's resume for the fast fry cook's position was actually a dummary of his career's achievements. After cooking the books at the bank for 30 years, he felt he could cook anything this place served.
Etymology: Dumb (not so smart) & Summary (a resume, brief job/education history;
Denyigreat
Created by: Jabberwocky
Pronunciation: dee/ny/I/grate
Sentence: In these tough economic times the only way I could get a job at the local McDonalds was to denyigreat, which was difficult because I am.
Etymology: deny + I + great + denigrate (disparage)
Gentrylevel
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: jentrēlevəl
Sentence: When Prince Gustuv found that the family fortune was not what it once was, it became clear that he would have to find a way to make some money. There are few jobs earmarked for the nobility so it looked he would have to downplay his rank and take a (gasp!) gentrylevel position. The interviewer tried hard to not burst out laughing when he saw "formerly know as Prince" on the resume.
Etymology: gentry (the class of people next below the nobility in position and birth) + level (a height or distance from the ground or another stated or understood base) play on entry-level
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COMMENTS:
superb - Jabberwocky, 2009-02-25: 14:40:00
Very good, and it made me laugh! - kateinkorea, 2009-02-26: 20:11:00
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Backgroundheck
Created by: splendiction
Pronunciation: back round heck
Sentence: When the supervisor eventually got around to verifying Sato’s resume denials, she’d probably cast it aside, giving him backgroundheck. How could a software specialist ever last fslipping burgers?
Etymology: From backgroundcheck (to verify references and qualifications) and "heck", a scold/verbal punishment.
Curriculumbidet
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: coor rik yu lum bee day
Sentence: His curriculum vitae read more like it had been made into a curriculumbidet...all the most recent events on his resume had been whitewashed and changed as though they never had happened or had not as much impact as one would have thought. When the recruiter asked him what skills he brought to the job of a waiter, Dubya as he was known for short, thought hard and long about it before responding. Okay, 10 seconds. "Well, I am good at taking orders from my Mom, Dad and Wife; I know how to run up a large tab; I can recommend Rice as a staple in any regime;Iraq up tips; I am good at nonsensical banter and if we get real busy, my two burly friends, who speak into their cufflinks, can lend a hand."
Etymology: Rhymes with Curriculum Vitae (a summary of your academic and work history) & Bidet (a basin for washing genitals and anal area)
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COMMENTS:
You are queen of the delightful denouement! His-tor-ically Funny! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-25: 02:11:00
Make that His-story-cally funny! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-25: 02:12:00
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Resumaynot
Created by: galwaywegian
Pronunciation: rez you mey noht
Sentence: her resumaynot neglected to mention any of her achievements since high school apart from the mose killing stuff
Etymology: resume may not
Comments:
Today's definition was suggested by metrohumanx. Thank you metrohumanx. ~ James
Today's definition was suggested by metrohumanx. Thank you metrohumanx. ~ James