Verboticisms

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: chīdandsēk

Sentence: After the hazard warning by Consumer Reports the job of the Customer Disservice Representatives is to do their best to shift the blame for problems back on to customers. With a technique they call chideandseek, they admonish callers for not following the overly-complicated owners manual that includes such sage wisdom as using safety goggles and chain-mail gloves when using any sharp product. If guilt does*t work, the trump card is to suggest that they are passing the call to a supervisor. Of course, all this does is put them back into the maze of a phone tree system.

Etymology: chide (scold or rebuke) + hide-and-seek (a children*s game in which one player tries to find other players who have hidden themselves)

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: kuss tart

Sentence: Moana was a real cusstart. She earned her living by insulting and swearing at people all day. It was her dream job, and she found her niche working as an abuse counsellor.

Etymology: Cuss (utter obscenities or profanities) & Tart (a woman who engages in sexual intercourse for money) and Wordplay on Custard (sweetened mixture of milk and eggs baked or boiled or frozen)

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Created by: PigeonPigeon

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Created by: Goldentongue

Pronunciation: zuermaster

Sentence: This company really needs an efficient swearmaster, it's employees are far too happy. Susan is an accomplished swearmaster, she can type 400 insults per minute

Etymology: Swear as in insult, Master as in someone who has a highly developed skill.

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Created by: jonobo

Pronunciation: "vulgar" like vulgar, "essional" like in professional.

Sentence: He was the highest ranking vulgaressional in business - they simply called him "The Vulgarator" (but friends called him simply jonobo).

Etymology: vulgar + professional = vulgaressional

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Created by: metrohumanx

Pronunciation: RICK-LUHR (rickled)

Sentence: Forget the banker and the TV sales maven… They’re not so clever- just clumsy and craven. Worse than a sort of a mental french tickler- Is an insult received from a really sick RICKLER

Etymology: The master: Don Rickles. A stand-up and club comic for over 60 years, Rickles all but invented insult comedy.

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COMMENTS:

http://www.wolframalpha.com/ - metrohumanx, 2009-11-09: 02:23:00

You rickled my funny bone... - Nosila, 2009-11-09: 21:53:00

You are COMPOSED of funny bones, Kiddo! - metrohumanx, 2009-11-10: 04:57:00

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Created by: multitasker

Pronunciation: in sult er a tor

Sentence: I used to enjoy bondage but now I prefer to use an insulterator

Etymology: Insult (to abuse verbally) + era (taking time) tor (to take part in the act of)

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Created by: playdohheart

Pronunciation: bur-nin-a-trix

Sentence: I pay my burninatrix to follow me around and insult me and I pay another dude to walk around and say "Buuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrrrrrrn" after every insult.

Etymology: Burn-insult; dominatrix-a woman paid to be the powerful one in a sexual relationship

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: af front per son

Sentence: Venoma had found the perfect job. She worked as an affrontperson for the telephone company at their fancy head office. It was jokingly called the Customer Service Dept; but employees there were encouraged to trade insults with patrons, both in person and over the phone. She worked with 2 others, Rudy & Curt and she always won the insult competitions the department had each week. Her family motto was, "The best defence is a good offense" and she strived to live up to that motto. Imagine her surprise when they were all told that the company was closing shop locally and farming it's business overseas...globalization it was called. But Venoma landed on her feet by being sent overseas to train the new employees on how to insult the customers, even with a strong foreign accent.

Etymology: Afront (a deliberately offensive act or something producing the effect of an affront;treat, mention, or speak to rudely) & Person (a human being)

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COMMENTS:

Hilarious and so true! Love the names Venoma, Rudy and Curt, too! - splendiction, 2009-11-09: 20:22:00

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Created by: cristaleo

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