Vote for the best verboticism.
DEFINITION: v. To ask someone who is clearly in a store uniform, perhaps on a ladder creating a display or running a cash register "Do you work here?" n. A person who doesn't know how to ask for assistance in a retail store without asking a stupid question.
Verboticisms
Click on each verboticism to read the sentences created by the Verbotomy writers, and to see your voting options...
You have two votes. Click on the words to read the details, then vote your favorite.
Retaildundunce
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: re tayl dun duns
Sentence: Chad was what we call a retaildundunce. He'd come into the store, approach a clerk who was obviously wearing a uniform, complete with name tag and ask them if they worked here? He did this in every department he went into and yet he never bought anything or asked about our merchandise. It turned out that Chad was a "Mystery Shopper" who was hired by an agency to check on our customer service levels. How did we find out what he did? When our security department apprehended him, under his jacket he wore a uniform complete with name tag that said, "Chad, Mystery Shopper!" DUH!
Etymology: Retail (the selling of goods to consumers; usually in small quantities and not for resale) & Redundant (repetition of same sense in different words; use of more words than required to express an idea) & Dunce (these words are used to express a low opinion of someone's intelligence)
Stupormarketing
Created by: mweinmann
Pronunciation: stoo + por + mark + keting
Sentence: As a retail clerk, Jonah could vouch for all of the stupormarketing that is occurring in his town. It is difficult for him to reign in the sarcasm when asked if he works in the store while he mops up a spill or stocks the shelves from a pile of boxes.
Etymology: Stupor (the lack of critical cognitive function) Supermarket( A large self-service retail market that sells food and household goods) marketing (shopping at a market)
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COMMENTS:
heh - galwaywegian, 2009-03-27: 10:45:00
stupendous! - silveryaspen, 2009-03-28: 15:42:00
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Cusdumber
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: kuhs-duh-mer
Sentence: If there is anything that a store clerk hates, it has to be the cusdumber who can't seem to do anything without asking a stupid question or making an ignorant statement. "Do you work here?" "This item is scratched (they just scratched it). Can I get a discount?" The only hope is if they get just a little dumber, they might forget to breath or how to get to to the store.
Etymology: customer (a person who purchases goods or services from another) + dumb (lacking intelligence or good judgment; stupid; dull-witted)
Boutiquery
Created by: remistram
Pronunciation: bow-teek-qwery
Sentence: His boutiquery was likely a sad excuse for a pick-up line but she didn't mind - she liked his slacks.
Etymology: boutique + query
Assking
Created by: silveryaspen
Pronunciation: ass king
Sentence: On his shoulder, the huge brassy button said in big letters: assistant manager. Therefore, everyone was asstounded and asstonished to hear Stu Pid, assking, "Do you work here?"
Etymology: ASS, KING, ASKING. Asking redumbdant (redundant) questions makes one an assking. ASS - offensive term that deliberately insults somebody's intelligence. KING - the greatest and most powerful leader of a people who are united by a common tie, in this case, by their level of intelligence. ASKING - to question.
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COMMENTS:
Very funny! And very good! - kateinkorea, 2009-03-27: 04:18:00
Well there's an Ass----,Klutz---- and a Moron---- for today...we're all in the same mood :) Good one there! - abrakadeborah, 2009-03-27: 05:36:00
terrific - Jabberwocky, 2009-03-27: 12:24:00
I know Stu....worked with him....tried to avoid him...couldnt. - Mustang, 2009-03-28: 03:32:00
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Duhblivious
Created by: Mustang
Pronunciation: duh-BLIV-yuss
Sentence: Vernon was so bad about overlooking the obvious and asking lame questions his friends had labeled his lame practice as duhblivious and even that was something that got by him.
Etymology: Blend of 'duh' (used to express annoyance at banality, obviousness, or stupidity) and 'oblivious' (unmindful; unconscious; unaware)
Querylyevident
Created by: Jabberwocky
Pronunciation: kweer/lee/ev/i/dent
Sentence: Even though Sam stood at the crosswalk in his bright orange vest with the yellow reflective stripe which said Crossing Guard, holding a giant stop sign, pedestrians would still pose the querlyevident question "Are you the Crossing Guard"? Sometimes it made him feel like running amok in traffic.
Etymology: query + evident + 'clearly evident'
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COMMENTS:
LOL! made him feel like running amok in traffic. GOOD ONE! - abrakadeborah, 2009-03-27: 22:49:00
Funny! - kateinkorea, 2009-03-28: 00:00:00
play on the oft said 'fairly evident', too. Excellent word! - silveryaspen, 2009-03-28: 15:00:00
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Parleyfool
Created by: readerwriter
Pronunciation: parh-lee-foolh
Sentence: This is a true story. It must be documented! During the 70s, while a hippie, wandering around Quebec, nervous about having to speak what little French I had absorbed in high school, I stuck my head into the door of a pub somewhere near Sherbrooke and spoke to a row of men sitting in semi-darkness at the bar, "Parlez-vous Francais?" They turned in unison, like a row of cows, and mooed, "Ooouui." Needless to say, I let the door slam shut and was too mortified to correct myself. What a parleyfool I was...
Etymology: Combining PARLEY, a discussion (from Fr. parler, to speak) + FOOL. Could be spelled ParlerFou!
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COMMENTS:
Cute story. :) - kateinkorea, 2009-03-27: 23:55:00
Enjoyed your sentence. Your create is a great blending plus a great fun pun on parle vous, too! - silveryaspen, 2009-03-28: 15:41:00
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Customyeranidiot
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: kəstəmyoŏranidēət
Sentence: Spring has come to the Mall. There is a sense of renewal as the new product lines are displayed. Gone are the Winter doldrums of the Christmas left-over sales and inventory sales. Maybe, just maybe the next customer who comes through the door will be engaging, funny, insightful, interesting... but alas each entrant into the customer-of-the-year competition seems to find a way to transmogrify from patron to customyeranidiot with insipid questions like, "Do you work here?" "Are these (the display with the strobing 50% off sign) the sale items?" or "This item that I just dropped on the floor has a chip. Can I get a mark-down on it?" The clerk soon retreats to thoughts of after-work diversions and mentally seeks a "happy place" instead of the "uzi on the rooftop" place. Retail is swell!
Etymology: customer (a person or organization that buys goods or services from a store or business) + "You're an idiot" (self- explanatory)
Customoron
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: kəstəmôrän
Sentence: ”It must be National Idiot Day” Debbie said to herself as one customoron after another took up the challenge of asking the stupidest question. ”Do you work here?” was beat out by ”Is this stuff (on the clearance table) on sale? She can’t wait to see what they come up with today.
Etymology: customer (a person or organization that buys goods or services from a store or business) + moron (a stupid person)
Comments:
Today's definition was suggested by ladyiggy. Thank you ladyiggy. ~ James
ladyiggy - 2009-03-27: 09:46:00
You are very welcomed. Great words. It's hard to pick.
kateinkorea - 2009-03-28: 10:16:00
Good word!
Thank you! And really, it is hard to be polite to retail staffers without being stupid. ~ James
Today's definition was suggested by ladyiggy. Thank you ladyiggy. ~ James
Malinareink - 2018-10-11: 00:51:00
Genkareink - 2018-10-11: 10:58:00
Marinareink - 2018-10-11: 13:31:00