Verboticisms

Created by: remistram

Pronunciation: ghy-duhns

Sentence: "Do as I say, not as I do" was the most important guidunce her Mum ever gave her.

Etymology: guidance + dunce

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COMMENTS:

great word - Jabberwocky, 2007-09-28: 12:06:00

Great Word! Accurate sentence in a lot of cases! - Scrumpy, 2007-09-28: 13:22:00

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Created by: PeeJaY

Pronunciation: PAIR-REN-FIK-SHON

Sentence: Alice was adept at providing all sorts of parenfiction to stop here eleven sons from fighting with each other.

Etymology: A conjoining of Parent and Fiction describing the untruths manufactured by desperate parents.

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Created by: Rehlit

Pronunciation: kaw-sham

Sentence: Many parents use an insidious causham to frighten their naughty children. Such as "If you eat watermelon seeds, a watermelon will grow in your stomach!"

Etymology: Caution(a warning against danger or evil; anything serving as a warning) + sham (something that is not what it purports to be; a spurious imitation; fraud or hoax; pretended; counterfeit; feigned:)

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Created by: thebaron

Pronunciation: ma-ma-lore

Sentence: Whenever we ate oranges and swallowed the seeds, Aunt Janet would spurt out some mamalore, saying that oranges trees would grow in our stomachs.

Etymology: mama (mother) lore (length/myth)

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Created by: mrskellyscl

Pronunciation: high-perb-mo--ni-tion

Sentence: Mom could come up with a great hyperbmonition when needed, especially where boys were concerned. As a result of her wise counsel, I haven't worn patent leather shoes since the fourth grade.

Etymology: hyperbole: figure of speech in which exaggeration is used for emphasis or effect + monition: cautionary advice or counsel; admonition

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Created by: metrohumanx

Pronunciation: bee-HAY-vee-uhr-ELSE-ohyd

Sentence: " I can tell if you're lying - just by feeling your nose." I told little Tommy. With a scream of terror he covered his face like a three foot tall Bela Lugosi and ran home crying. My use of a common BEHAVIORELSEOID works every time, flushing out little untruths wherever they might be lurking. The incident was witnessed by little Laura, who later explained that "There are more blood vessels in the nose." Although there may be some guilt associated with the use of BEHAVIORELSEOIDS in modern childrearing, experts have justified it's use as a potent counterbalance to "freezer experiments", "suspiciously quiet bedrooms" and hilariously blantant lies. By the way, why are there eleven eggs in the fridge and one in the hedges? Someone was trying to HATCH one, weren't they? Come on, let me feel your nose.....

Etymology: BEHAVIor+OR ELSE+ -OID= BEHAVIORELSEOID BEHAVIOR:the manner of conducting oneself ,anything that an organism or urchin does involving action and response to stimulation or uncertainty -alteration of Middle English behavour, from behaven.....OR ELSE: idiom meaning "Regardless of any extenuating circumstances- and I MEAN IT!".....-OID:suffix - something resembling an object or having a (specified) quality of fear inducing behavior modification.

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COMMENTS:

Q: What do Fred Sanford, Augie Doggie, Chuck Connors and Fred MacMurray have in common?.........................A: http://www.tvdads.com/tvdads.shtml - metrohumanx, 2008-08-29: 07:52:00

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Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: Mom - uh - trom - uh

Sentence: Daphne ducked whenever her mother would begin ranting about normal risks in every day life, fearing the devastating emotional damage from mamatrauma much more than she feared daily living.

Etymology: Blend of 'mama' (mother parent) and 'trauma' (an experience that produces psychological injury or pain)

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COMMENTS:

Keep making that face, and it will STAY that way forever! - metrohumanx, 2008-08-29: 06:03:00

"Eat one more piece of that candy and the dentist will have to pull all your teeth out!" - lumina, 2008-08-29: 15:30:00

No BB gun, you'll put somebody's eye out. - Mustang, 2008-08-30: 04:44:00

No BB gun, you'll put somebody's eye out. - Mustang, 2008-08-30: 06:39:00

Okaaaaaaaaaaaay...go ahead if you want..........all I will say is, "Santa is wathinggggggggggggg." - lumina, 2008-08-31: 21:03:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: pol tree guyst

Sentence: Chickenita Bantama had a hard time persuading her youngest chick,Henny Youngman, to eat his feed. She finally had to resort to scare tactics and told him the tale of the poultrygeist. It was a scary ghost chicken that came after little chicks that did not eat up their supper. It worked for her, even if some thought it was fowl play...Happy Halloween!

Etymology: Poultry (a domesticated gallinaceous bird) & Poltergeist (a ghost that announces its presence with rapping and the creation of disorder)

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COMMENTS:

LOVING YOUR STORIES - DrWebsterIII, 2012-10-31: 11:24:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: rad MOM ish in

Sentence: Growing up in an Irish household,the 6 siblings were all raised on a solid diet of good old radmomition. This included an assorted mix of superstitions (spilling salt requires you to throw some over your left shoulder), Aesop's fables(remember that grasshopper and the ant?), lessons from the Bible(Thou shalt not lie about who ate the baking out of the freezer) and old wives' tales(if you tell a lie, your nose will grow), guaranteed to scare even the toughest know-it-all kid into submission. It was never really understood how putting a hat on the bed or opening an umbrella indoors would bring about bad luck; how stepping on a crack could break your mother's back or how licking a frosty metal fence would make your tongue stick to it. (Okay, that on was really true, as one brother found out the hard way)! Yet all these tools were used by their mother to great effectiveness. People marvelled at how well-behaved 6 kids could be out in public. But one look from their Mom's omnipresent eye could nail them to a couch for hours on end, quietly, without a hint of physical persuasion. Santa's elves were watching you just before Christmas time (I mean really, weren't they too busy making toys?); God would be mad to learn you did not put your coins on the offering plate in Church (like does he count it all?)If there was no known adage to affect a situation, she simply would make one up. It was not until they were into their teens that they discovered the Ice Cream Man going around the neighbourhood played his twinkly songs when he still had goodies left to sell. They had always been told that the music was a sign he was sold out. The irony was that all these siblings went through higher education, got responsible jobs and used exactly the same radmomition tactics on their own children and grandchildren...May you be half an hour in Heaven before the Devil knows you're dead!

Etymology: Radical (a person who has out there ideas or opinions;used of opinions and actions far beyond the norm) & Admonition (cautionary advice about something imminent;counsel in terms of someone's behavior;warn strongly; put on guard) & Mom (female parent)& Superstition (an irrational belief arising from ignorance or fear;folklore;omens of good and bad luck)

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COMMENTS:

Oh MAN!!!!...You mean the ice cream man WASN'T sold out? - metrohumanx, 2008-08-29: 05:56:00

"Mom's omnipresent eye"....great turn of a phrase, Nosette. :) - metrohumanx, 2008-08-29: 08:11:00

Actual advice from an Alaskan native: Do NOT try to lick the glaciers. - Tigger, 2008-08-29: 10:34:00

Great "sentence!" :) - lumina, 2008-08-29: 15:46:00

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Created by: artr

Pronunciation: skair-uh-fi-key-shuhn

Sentence: Mother hen believes in the use of scarefication to keep her chicks in line. A little lie here, an exaggeration there, all pecked into their little psyches until they are afraid to do anything wrong.

Etymology: scare (to fill, especially suddenly, with fear or terror; frighten; alarm) Scarification (scratching, etching, burning/branding, or superficially cutting designs, pictures, or words into the skin as a permanent body modification)

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