Verboticisms

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: rad MOM ish in

Sentence: Growing up in an Irish household,the 6 siblings were all raised on a solid diet of good old radmomition. This included an assorted mix of superstitions (spilling salt requires you to throw some over your left shoulder), Aesop's fables(remember that grasshopper and the ant?), lessons from the Bible(Thou shalt not lie about who ate the baking out of the freezer) and old wives' tales(if you tell a lie, your nose will grow), guaranteed to scare even the toughest know-it-all kid into submission. It was never really understood how putting a hat on the bed or opening an umbrella indoors would bring about bad luck; how stepping on a crack could break your mother's back or how licking a frosty metal fence would make your tongue stick to it. (Okay, that on was really true, as one brother found out the hard way)! Yet all these tools were used by their mother to great effectiveness. People marvelled at how well-behaved 6 kids could be out in public. But one look from their Mom's omnipresent eye could nail them to a couch for hours on end, quietly, without a hint of physical persuasion. Santa's elves were watching you just before Christmas time (I mean really, weren't they too busy making toys?); God would be mad to learn you did not put your coins on the offering plate in Church (like does he count it all?)If there was no known adage to affect a situation, she simply would make one up. It was not until they were into their teens that they discovered the Ice Cream Man going around the neighbourhood played his twinkly songs when he still had goodies left to sell. They had always been told that the music was a sign he was sold out. The irony was that all these siblings went through higher education, got responsible jobs and used exactly the same radmomition tactics on their own children and grandchildren...May you be half an hour in Heaven before the Devil knows you're dead!

Etymology: Radical (a person who has out there ideas or opinions;used of opinions and actions far beyond the norm) & Admonition (cautionary advice about something imminent;counsel in terms of someone's behavior;warn strongly; put on guard) & Mom (female parent)& Superstition (an irrational belief arising from ignorance or fear;folklore;omens of good and bad luck)

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COMMENTS:

Oh MAN!!!!...You mean the ice cream man WASN'T sold out? - metrohumanx, 2008-08-29: 05:56:00

"Mom's omnipresent eye"....great turn of a phrase, Nosette. :) - metrohumanx, 2008-08-29: 08:11:00

Actual advice from an Alaskan native: Do NOT try to lick the glaciers. - Tigger, 2008-08-29: 10:34:00

Great "sentence!" :) - lumina, 2008-08-29: 15:46:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: pol tree guyst

Sentence: Chickenita Bantama had a hard time persuading her youngest chick,Henny Youngman, to eat his feed. She finally had to resort to scare tactics and told him the tale of the poultrygeist. It was a scary ghost chicken that came after little chicks that did not eat up their supper. It worked for her, even if some thought it was fowl play...Happy Halloween!

Etymology: Poultry (a domesticated gallinaceous bird) & Poltergeist (a ghost that announces its presence with rapping and the creation of disorder)

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COMMENTS:

LOVING YOUR STORIES - DrWebsterIII, 2012-10-31: 11:24:00

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Created by: artr

Pronunciation: mom-bomz

Sentence: She had tried chiding. She had tried guilt. Finally Mom went to the scarsenal and started lobbing mombombs. Scientists aren't sure how deep the psychological scars go but, like a black hole, the light of logic rarely escapes from this abyss.

Etymology: Mom (noun: informal, one's mother) + bomb (noun: incendiary material or other destructive substance)

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COMMENTS:

Fire in the hole! - metrohumanx, 2008-08-29: 06:05:00

We usually hid for cover up in the Dadic. - lumina, 2008-08-29: 15:38:00

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Created by: petaj

Pronunciation: mum-steer

Sentence: I gave up listening to my mother after one to many mumsteers.

Etymology: bum steer + mum

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Created by: idavecook

Pronunciation: Just eat it kid.

Sentence: My mom's limabeanery had become so overwhelming that I had to move out of the ouse because I ran with the flippin' scissors.

Etymology: Lima Beans + Your Mom + My irrational fear

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Created by: porsche

Pronunciation: im/par/a/bul

Sentence: A typical imparable would be the story of the bogeyman

Etymology: impair (damage) + parable (short story used to teach a lesson)

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Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: bad-mo-ni-shun

Sentence: Know for her dark predictions, Grandma offered another of her badmonitions when she told us that eating too much candy would stunt our growth.

Etymology: bad + admonition

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Created by: mrskellyscl

Pronunciation: high-perb-mo--ni-tion

Sentence: Mom could come up with a great hyperbmonition when needed, especially where boys were concerned. As a result of her wise counsel, I haven't worn patent leather shoes since the fourth grade.

Etymology: hyperbole: figure of speech in which exaggeration is used for emphasis or effect + monition: cautionary advice or counsel; admonition

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Created by: artr

Pronunciation: līpərbəlē

Sentence: ”If you make a face, it could get stuck that way”, ”Behave because Santa is watching”, ”This is for your own good”. Many parents use lieperbole to keep their children in line.

Etymology: lie (an intentionally false statement) + hyperbole (exaggerated statements or claims not meant to be taken literally)

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COMMENTS:

Very nice. For the win, in my opinion. - mchristof, 2011-06-12: 23:50:00

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Created by: ErWenn

Pronunciation: /ˈmæləpro(ʊ)ˌskɹɪpʃən/

Sentence: Most new parents promise themselves that they'll always be open and honest with their children, but each time they are asked "Why not?", the probability of the birth of a new malaproscription increases.

Etymology: from malapropism + proscription

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