Vote for the best verboticism.

'Our boss said I had to attend this meeting.'

DEFINITION: v. To arrive at a meeting completely unprepared and then work diligently and obviously to distract yourself from the proceedings. n. A person who attends a meeting but does not believe that they are paid enough to actually pay attention.

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Verboticisms

Click on each verboticism to read the sentences created by the Verbotomy writers, and to see your voting options...

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Spectraitor

Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: spec/tray/tur

Sentence: John attended the morning meeting merely as a spectraitor. He successfully sabotaged establishing the agenda for the day.

Etymology: spectator (onlooker) + traitor (subversive element)

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COMMENTS:

Wow! I admire the way you select words and put them together in your sentence and verboticisms so that we don't just read and understand ... they also evoke feelings and emotions ... of all kinds. Not only is your sentence and word right on the definition, but evokes that antipathy we all feel when it happens. Outstanding verboticism! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-24: 10:32:00

Cleverly constructed word. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-03-24: 19:49:00

...now if he could only get the competition to pay him for sabotaging the meetings. Hmmm. Nice word! - Tigger, 2008-03-24: 21:16:00

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Trystolackadaisicalist

Created by: VigilanteLexicant

Pronunciation: TRIHST-o-LAK-a-DAYZ-a-kull-ihst.

Sentence: Jeremiah was prone to being a trystolackadaisicalist; he attended meetings but clearly didn't care one whit about what went on there.

Etymology: From tryst (an agreement to meet at a certain time and place) and lackadaisical (lazy or uncaring).

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Offassoffender

Created by: silveryaspen

Pronunciation: off - ass - uhf - end - er

Sentence: Once in awhile, an office has an offassoffender, who slacks off, and sluffs off, his work onto others. He is unready and unwilling to go to the meeting table. Off-timed, he strolls in with nothing, and mouths off, spewing off the cuff, off the peg, off the wall remarks, many of them off key, off color, and offensive. The boss finally had enoff. He offed him ... he took him off the books, and right off the job! That was the end of awful Mr. Offalhead.

Etymology: Office, Ass, Offender,

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COMMENTS:

That horse's patoot was no doubt the butt of many jokes over the water cooler. The boss was right to expel that stinker from the offeces. - Mustang, 2008-03-24: 05:31:00

Those puns are just offal. - stache, 2008-03-24: 10:05:00

Offally amusing! - spotthecat1, 2008-03-24: 16:28:00

Very clever and amusing. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-03-24: 19:53:00

Don't think I've ever heard anyone being called an "Offalhead" before. It's very 'PC'and I may just use it when talking about some Offassoffenders I know. ;) - Tigger, 2008-03-24: 20:18:00

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Reprezzzzzentative

Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: rep rez ent eh tiv

Sentence: The bosses' reprezzzzzzentative sneered his way through the nahgenda.

Etymology: representative zzzzzzzzzzz.

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COMMENTS:

I love 'nahgenda' — it really epitomizes meetings where nothing is accomplished. - Tigger, 2008-03-24: 21:11:00

Very innovative etymology and creations! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-24: 21:28:00

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Blunderachiever

Created by: Tigger

Pronunciation: /BLUN-der-uh-chee-ver/

Sentence: Scott was a consistent blunderachiever at work. Last week he brought his newpaper to the project meeting, read the comics, and he even laughed out loud a few times during the status review. Then he started on his crossword puzzle — he leaned over and whispered to Jennifer "Psst, what's a 4-letter word for 'silence'?" and when she told him to "Hush!" he just just nodded and said, "Hey, thanks."

Etymology: Blunder - to move or act blindly, stupidly (from Old Norse, blundra "shut one's eyes") + Underachiever - a person who performs below expectations (under "below" & achieve "attain through effort")

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COMMENTS:

Scott was no doubt suffering from delusions of adequacy. He should consider taking up farming where he'd no doubt be truly outstanding in his field. - Mustang, 2008-03-24: 05:35:00

petaj Scott was once a pasture tending his flock, but he was vergerly a nave and they all flocked off. - petaj, 2008-03-24: 06:41:00

I admire and enjoy the chuckles your witty sentence and word brings. I always learn a little something from your etymology when you include the word's country of origin. As always, very nice creation! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-24: 10:00:00

Amusing sentence; nice word, too - OZZIEBOB, 2008-03-24: 19:52:00

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Attendunce

CrayonWarrior

Created by: CrayonWarrior

Pronunciation: X-SAMPA - QtendVns At-end-un-s

Sentence: Margaret was a real attendunce. she would show up at a meeting and sit there playing on her IPhone, with no clue as to anything going on around her

Etymology: Attend - to be present Dunce - a fool

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Contratendant

Created by: doseydotes

Pronunciation: ˈkän-trə-ˈten-dənt

Sentence: Lars spent the entire meeting paging through the Wall Street Journal and humming absently to himself, to his son's 5th grade teacher's great consternation. "Mr. Beauregard!" she exclaimed, "I can't believe you would be such a contratendant to this parent-teacher conference!"

Etymology: From the Greek, contra, meaning an illegal association with a Middle-Eastern dictatorship; from the Kusumapura, ten, meaning "of brace-wearing age"; and from the Irish, dant, meaning, "shall not," or, literally, "dare not."

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COMMENTS:

Your etymologies are always so very enlightening. Superlatively done. Keep up the good work! - stache, 2008-03-24: 14:30:00

Close to the mark! - OZZIEBOB, 2008-03-24: 19:50:00

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Convennui

Created by: stache

Pronunciation: kən-vēn'-wē'

Sentence: Having finished the crossword, sudoku and cryptoquote, Mervin was left to endure the remainder of the meeting in a tortured state of convennui.....OK, fine, this is a noun, not a verb. Take this: There was a young lawyer named Bree, Who practiced up in Kankakee. In the docket meeting, her interest was fleeting: She had a case of convennui. Whatever, dude.

Etymology: convene,to meet, Middle English convenen, from Old French convenir, from Latin convenīre, + ennui, boredom, from Old French enui, from ennuyer, to annoy, bore

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COMMENTS:

hehe! - purpleartichokes, 2008-03-24: 10:46:00

Fine job on the pronunciation. Your sentence is a double dose of hitting the definition, once in prose and once in rhyme ... you really fit everything in this time! Love the French flair in your etymology and verboticism. So well put together. Excellent! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-24: 10:46:00

Enui-ne-scrumptious, as usual, stache. - doseydotes, 2008-03-24: 17:21:00

Mervin sounds like a real Convennuinie (pron. con-ven-wee'-nee). - Tigger, 2008-03-24: 21:05:00

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Attendunce

Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: att enn duhn sssssss

Sentence: The attendunce at the meeting was blimpressive

Etymology: attendance, dunce

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Dislaction

Created by: Biscotti

Pronunciation: dys-lack-shun

Sentence: John was a severe dislaction when he showed up to the quarterly report meeting dressed up in a gorilla suit and screaming "Guerilla warfare, recruit the monkies!!" Needless to say, he was dragged away on possible terrorism charges and lost his job.

Etymology: distraction (getting other's attention away from the problem at hand) + slacker (one who is consistently lazy)

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COMMENTS:

Entertainalicious! - doseydotes, 2008-03-24: 17:08:00

Roared with laughter ... Great creates! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-24: 21:16:00

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2008-03-24: 00:01:00
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James

arrrteest - 2008-03-24: 07:46:00
This is a poem I actually wrote in a meeting:

Meeting Hell
By David E. Selvin

As I sit here in this meeting,
My mind's attention span is fleeting,
I contemplate actually retreating,
From this place in meeting hell.

But from the clock, it's click and clocking,
My state of mind, it keeps on mocking,
My inner scream, to me, is shocking,
As I hallucinate the ending bell.

Still, I came with no allusion,
Complicit in my blind collusion,
For my schedule’s planned intrusion,
That I’ve come to accept, but dread.

I arrive and check the seating,
Politely smile and say a greeting,
Knowing sanity will take a beating,
Within the confines of my weary head.

Still, although, I'm stuck here sitting,
My stomach lining must be pitting,
A straight jacket soon just might be fitting,
And only time will surely tell.

I hope a response is not required,
They might notice sanity expired,
And ability to reason duly mired,
My interest level a labored sell.

I awake: Is it a nightmare?
I catch myself with an insipid blank stare,
Hearing talking though the stale air,
Not all sure where it’s coming from.

Try to focus. What is the topic?
The planner’s plans were quite myopic,
My mind is on an island tropic,
My body sits here limp and numb.

I hope I don’t get called to answer,
My pulse would rise as if a dancer,
My body pained as if full with cancer,
Reacting like a hammered thumb.

A sympathetic nod of head,
Seems to follow just what is said,
But an EEG would read out "dead,"
An indication not all is well.

I'm not sure what I gain from training,
For what topic that it's pertaining,
The whole experience is very draining,
My angst is what I need to quell.
My angst is what I need to quell.

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2008-03-24: 08:40:00
Excellent poem arrrteest! It insubordinuttily captures the disenwaged spirit of a slacktendant agendabender. ~ James

Jamagra - 2008-03-24: 09:19:00
Quoth the employee, "Nevermore!"

silveryaspen - 2008-03-24: 11:07:00
Remistram and James, your definition and cartoon are a big hit! They not only inspired great verboticisms (not a bad one in the bunch again) but even poetry! Laughter, too! Great job!

silveryaspen - 2008-03-24: 11:10:00
Did you write your poem in a meeting hell, arrrteest? It is a wonderfully well done rhyme and adds much to our time here today! I'm so glad you shared it with us.

arrrteest - 2008-03-24: 13:36:00
Write it in meeting hell? Yes, I did! It was a mind numbing, pointless, poorly thought out, going through the motions, no followthrough afterwards, dead in the water, series of meetings/"trainings" that is enherent within large organizations. It was complete with "activators," "capture sheets" and "group participation." Aaaah phoey. You bet. Am I sarred for life? Well let's just say the poem saved me from $$$$ of therapy. If you want to be productive and positive in a meeting, don't sit next to me. LOL!

purpleartichokes - 2008-03-24: 16:00:00
Great poem arrrteest! I think I was at that meeting.

Jamagra - 2008-03-24: 16:41:00
Wow Arteest! Glad you have writing as an outlet from meeting hell! I really do NOT miss those days!

arrrteest - 2008-03-24: 17:22:00
"inherent"-ah an errant moment

wayoffcenter - 2009-01-14: 04:40:00
but your word is not in your sentence...

wayoffcenter - 2009-01-14: 04:46:00
Sorry, comment in wrong spot (and I used to laugh at people who made this mistake) Comment was meant for Illoiterite.

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-05-31: 00:30:00
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James