Vote for the best verboticism.
DEFINITION: v. To arrive at a meeting completely unprepared and then work diligently and obviously to distract yourself from the proceedings. n. A person who attends a meeting but does not believe that they are paid enough to actually pay attention.
Verboticisms
Click on each verboticism to read the sentences created by the Verbotomy writers, and to see your voting options...
You have two votes. Click on the words to read the details, then vote your favorite.
Contratendant
Created by: doseydotes
Pronunciation: ˈkän-trə-ˈten-dənt
Sentence: Lars spent the entire meeting paging through the Wall Street Journal and humming absently to himself, to his son's 5th grade teacher's great consternation. "Mr. Beauregard!" she exclaimed, "I can't believe you would be such a contratendant to this parent-teacher conference!"
Etymology: From the Greek, contra, meaning an illegal association with a Middle-Eastern dictatorship; from the Kusumapura, ten, meaning "of brace-wearing age"; and from the Irish, dant, meaning, "shall not," or, literally, "dare not."
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COMMENTS:
Your etymologies are always so very enlightening. Superlatively done. Keep up the good work! - stache, 2008-03-24: 14:30:00
Close to the mark! - OZZIEBOB, 2008-03-24: 19:50:00
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Poohpoohbah
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: poōpoōbä
Sentence: Bob attends meetings as directed. That doesn’t mean he feels the need to contribute anything useful. He is the self-appointed poohpoohbah of the conference. If anybody makes a suggestion he will begrudging look up from his Blackberry long enough to utter something like ”That won’t work” or ”That’s a stupid idea” and go back to ignoring the proceedings.
Etymology: Pooh-pooh (dismiss (an idea or suggestion) as being foolish or impractical) + Pooh-bah (a person having much influence or holding many offices at the same time, esp. one perceived as pompously self-important)
Convennui
Created by: stache
Pronunciation: kən-vēn'-wē'
Sentence: Having finished the crossword, sudoku and cryptoquote, Mervin was left to endure the remainder of the meeting in a tortured state of convennui.....OK, fine, this is a noun, not a verb. Take this: There was a young lawyer named Bree, Who practiced up in Kankakee. In the docket meeting, her interest was fleeting: She had a case of convennui. Whatever, dude.
Etymology: convene,to meet, Middle English convenen, from Old French convenir, from Latin convenīre, + ennui, boredom, from Old French enui, from ennuyer, to annoy, bore
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COMMENTS:
hehe! - purpleartichokes, 2008-03-24: 10:46:00
Fine job on the pronunciation. Your sentence is a double dose of hitting the definition, once in prose and once in rhyme ... you really fit everything in this time! Love the French flair in your etymology and verboticism. So well put together. Excellent! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-24: 10:46:00
Enui-ne-scrumptious, as usual, stache. - doseydotes, 2008-03-24: 17:21:00
Mervin sounds like a real Convennuinie (pron. con-ven-wee'-nee). - Tigger, 2008-03-24: 21:05:00
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Dissforum
Created by: TJayzz
Pronunciation: Diss-for-rum
Sentence: Tony thought he was worth much more than his salary so when he had to attend a meeting he decided he would dissforum it by attending but paying no attention whatsoever.
Etymology: Diss(disrespect) + Forum(a meeting or exchange of views) = Dissforum
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COMMENTS:
as soon as I saw your word I thought of decorum which would work well in your etymology - great word - Jabberwocky, 2009-01-14: 16:17:00
Great create! - silveryaspen, 2009-01-15: 01:41:00
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Slacktendant
Created by: arrrteest
Pronunciation: slak-tend-ent
Sentence: Everyone who arrived at the meeting on time took a poll as to see what Jeff would bring with him to prove he was worthy of his slacktendant title. Two out of the four members who were there thought he would bring a copy of the latest anime or manga magazine he was sharing with Whistler from accounting. One said he would probably write emails and text his girlfriend on his Blackberry, while another said it had been a while since the last time he clipped his fingernails and toenails and plucked his nosehairs. Last Monday he brought the New York Times crossword puzzle and kept shouting out the words when he got them or muttering the clues under his breath.
Etymology: slacker (one who shirks work) + attendant (one who is present)
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COMMENTS:
Your sentence and word fit together, and fit the definition, like a hand in a glove Very well done! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-24: 01:40:00
You've no doubt met my brother in law, Mervyn? Great word! - Mustang, 2008-03-24: 06:13:00
Sorry, Mustang, I misspelled 'Mervyn' in my sentence. - stache, 2008-03-24: 10:10:00
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Slactor
Created by: readerwriter
Pronunciation: Sl-ak-tore
Sentence: The management team had to assume from his body language that notorious office slactor, Simon Sez, didn't realize he was attending his own exit interview.
Etymology: A blend of SLACKER, meaning a person who shirks work + ACTOR, a theatrical performer; feminine = slactress
Offassoffender
Created by: silveryaspen
Pronunciation: off - ass - uhf - end - er
Sentence: Once in awhile, an office has an offassoffender, who slacks off, and sluffs off, his work onto others. He is unready and unwilling to go to the meeting table. Off-timed, he strolls in with nothing, and mouths off, spewing off the cuff, off the peg, off the wall remarks, many of them off key, off color, and offensive. The boss finally had enoff. He offed him ... he took him off the books, and right off the job! That was the end of awful Mr. Offalhead.
Etymology: Office, Ass, Offender,
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COMMENTS:
That horse's patoot was no doubt the butt of many jokes over the water cooler. The boss was right to expel that stinker from the offeces. - Mustang, 2008-03-24: 05:31:00
Those puns are just offal. - stache, 2008-03-24: 10:05:00
Offally amusing! - spotthecat1, 2008-03-24: 16:28:00
Very clever and amusing. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-03-24: 19:53:00
Don't think I've ever heard anyone being called an "Offalhead" before. It's very 'PC'and I may just use it when talking about some Offassoffenders I know. ;) - Tigger, 2008-03-24: 20:18:00
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Reprezzzzzentative
Created by: galwaywegian
Pronunciation: rep rez ent eh tiv
Sentence: The bosses' reprezzzzzzentative sneered his way through the nahgenda.
Etymology: representative zzzzzzzzzzz.
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COMMENTS:
I love 'nahgenda' — it really epitomizes meetings where nothing is accomplished. - Tigger, 2008-03-24: 21:11:00
Very innovative etymology and creations! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-24: 21:28:00
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Attendease
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: att ten deez
Sentence: Seth was there, if only in body not in spirit, when the corporate meetings Started. His apparent attendease is due to the fact that the Boss told him to go and be paid for the experience, even if he felt no need to participate in any meaningful way.
Etymology: Attendee (a person who participates in a meeting) & Ease (that which is not hard)
Spectraitor
Created by: Jabberwocky
Pronunciation: spec/tray/tur
Sentence: John attended the morning meeting merely as a spectraitor. He successfully sabotaged establishing the agenda for the day.
Etymology: spectator (onlooker) + traitor (subversive element)
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COMMENTS:
Excellent! - silveryaspen, 2009-01-14: 12:03:00
great word - TJayzz, 2009-01-14: 15:29:00
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Comments:
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James
arrrteest - 2008-03-24: 07:46:00
This is a poem I actually wrote in a meeting:
Meeting Hell
By David E. Selvin
As I sit here in this meeting,
My mind's attention span is fleeting,
I contemplate actually retreating,
From this place in meeting hell.
But from the clock, it's click and clocking,
My state of mind, it keeps on mocking,
My inner scream, to me, is shocking,
As I hallucinate the ending bell.
Still, I came with no allusion,
Complicit in my blind collusion,
For my schedule’s planned intrusion,
That I’ve come to accept, but dread.
I arrive and check the seating,
Politely smile and say a greeting,
Knowing sanity will take a beating,
Within the confines of my weary head.
Still, although, I'm stuck here sitting,
My stomach lining must be pitting,
A straight jacket soon just might be fitting,
And only time will surely tell.
I hope a response is not required,
They might notice sanity expired,
And ability to reason duly mired,
My interest level a labored sell.
I awake: Is it a nightmare?
I catch myself with an insipid blank stare,
Hearing talking though the stale air,
Not all sure where it’s coming from.
Try to focus. What is the topic?
The planner’s plans were quite myopic,
My mind is on an island tropic,
My body sits here limp and numb.
I hope I don’t get called to answer,
My pulse would rise as if a dancer,
My body pained as if full with cancer,
Reacting like a hammered thumb.
A sympathetic nod of head,
Seems to follow just what is said,
But an EEG would read out "dead,"
An indication not all is well.
I'm not sure what I gain from training,
For what topic that it's pertaining,
The whole experience is very draining,
My angst is what I need to quell.
My angst is what I need to quell.
Excellent poem arrrteest! It insubordinuttily captures the disenwaged spirit of a slacktendant agendabender. ~ James
Jamagra - 2008-03-24: 09:19:00
Quoth the employee, "Nevermore!"
silveryaspen - 2008-03-24: 11:07:00
Remistram and James, your definition and cartoon are a big hit! They not only inspired great verboticisms (not a bad one in the bunch again) but even poetry! Laughter, too! Great job!
silveryaspen - 2008-03-24: 11:10:00
Did you write your poem in a meeting hell, arrrteest? It is a wonderfully well done rhyme and adds much to our time here today! I'm so glad you shared it with us.
arrrteest - 2008-03-24: 13:36:00
Write it in meeting hell? Yes, I did! It was a mind numbing, pointless, poorly thought out, going through the motions, no followthrough afterwards, dead in the water, series of meetings/"trainings" that is enherent within large organizations. It was complete with "activators," "capture sheets" and "group participation." Aaaah phoey. You bet. Am I sarred for life? Well let's just say the poem saved me from $$$$ of therapy. If you want to be productive and positive in a meeting, don't sit next to me. LOL!
purpleartichokes - 2008-03-24: 16:00:00
Great poem arrrteest! I think I was at that meeting.
Jamagra - 2008-03-24: 16:41:00
Wow Arteest! Glad you have writing as an outlet from meeting hell! I really do NOT miss those days!
arrrteest - 2008-03-24: 17:22:00
"inherent"-ah an errant moment
wayoffcenter - 2009-01-14: 04:40:00
but your word is not in your sentence...
wayoffcenter - 2009-01-14: 04:46:00
Sorry, comment in wrong spot (and I used to laugh at people who made this mistake) Comment was meant for Illoiterite.
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James