Vote for the best verboticism.
DEFINITION: v. To arrive at a meeting completely unprepared and then work diligently and obviously to distract yourself from the proceedings. n. A person who attends a meeting but does not believe that they are paid enough to actually pay attention.
Verboticisms
Click on each verboticism to read the sentences created by the Verbotomy writers, and to see your voting options...
You have two votes. Click on the words to read the details, then vote your favorite.
Attendease
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: att ten deez
Sentence: Seth was there, if only in body not in spirit, when the corporate meetings Started. His apparent attendease is due to the fact that the Boss told him to go and be paid for the experience, even if he felt no need to participate in any meaningful way.
Etymology: Attendee (a person who participates in a meeting) & Ease (that which is not hard)
Doesntapplytameister
Created by: diyan627
Pronunciation: doesn't apply ta meister
Sentence: Rachna arrived at the meeting 10 minutes late sipping on her Starbucks coffee from a green straw, and set her cell phone on the conference table. Meanwhile the rest of us were contemplating how to merge the access databases so as to not lose the 10 months of research data and who was going to work on making the copies of the files before the merge. Her cell phone rang, and she excused herself. By the time she came back, we had assigned her a large portion of the inter-rater reliability data entry. After the meeting, she complained, "I have a Masters degree in public health; I shouldn't have to do data entry!" The Doesntapplytameister has been getting stuck with all the dirty work for so long now, and she can't quite figure out why.
Etymology: does not apply + to + me + meister
Offassoffender
Created by: silveryaspen
Pronunciation: off - ass - uhf - end - er
Sentence: Once in awhile, an office has an offassoffender, who slacks off, and sluffs off, his work onto others. He is unready and unwilling to go to the meeting table. Off-timed, he strolls in with nothing, and mouths off, spewing off the cuff, off the peg, off the wall remarks, many of them off key, off color, and offensive. The boss finally had enoff. He offed him ... he took him off the books, and right off the job! That was the end of awful Mr. Offalhead.
Etymology: Office, Ass, Offender,
----------------------------
COMMENTS:
That horse's patoot was no doubt the butt of many jokes over the water cooler. The boss was right to expel that stinker from the offeces. - Mustang, 2008-03-24: 05:31:00
Those puns are just offal. - stache, 2008-03-24: 10:05:00
Offally amusing! - spotthecat1, 2008-03-24: 16:28:00
Very clever and amusing. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-03-24: 19:53:00
Don't think I've ever heard anyone being called an "Offalhead" before. It's very 'PC'and I may just use it when talking about some Offassoffenders I know. ;) - Tigger, 2008-03-24: 20:18:00
----------------------------
Illoiterite
Created by: Mustang
Pronunciation: ill-OYT-er-ite
Sentence: An inveterate illoiterite, Brandon typically comes to the staff meeting totally unprepared, disinterested and withdrawn, chosing to read his sports magazine rather than to participate in the proceedings.
Etymology: Blend of 'illiterate' (displaying a marked lack of knowledge in a particular field) and 'loiter' (to linger aimlessly or as if aimless in or about a place) with the suffix 'ite' (Adherent or follower of)
Barticipate
Created by: GlobalGallery
Pronunciation: Bar-tissa-payt
Sentence: Roger arrived half-dressed and unshaven to the early sales meeting. He wasn't happy to be there so he sat back with the sports page and chose to barticipate for the entire meeting.
Etymology: 1.bar - to exclude. 2.participate - to take part in or share with others.
Attentiondeficitdisbursement
Created by: Stevenson0
Pronunciation: at/ten/sion/de/fi/cit/dis/burse/ment
Sentence: Whenever Joe showed up at a meeting and found out that he wasn't being paid enough per hour for his computer expertise his ADD (attentiondeficitdisbursement) condition would suddenly act up until he felt he was being properly compensated.
Etymology: ADD + attention deficit disorder + disbursement (payment)
----------------------------
COMMENTS:
It took some original thought to ADD up those words into a very unique creation! Clever! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-24: 10:06:00
----------------------------
Illoiterite
Created by: Mustang
Pronunciation: ill-OYT-er-ite
Sentence: An inveterate illoiterite, Thurgood typically came to the staff meeting totally unprepared, disinterested and withdrawn, chosing to read his girly magazine rather than to participate in the proceedings.
Etymology: Blend of 'illiterate' (displaying a marked lack of knowledge in a particular field) and 'loiter' (to linger aimlessly or as if aimless in or about a place) with the suffix 'ite' (Adherent or follower of)
Narblivious
Created by: Niktionary
Pronunciation: nar-bli-vee-us
Sentence: Since she was the CEO's daughter, the new "Vice President of Positivity" was completely narblivious after finding out she had to fire the entire department.
Etymology: narscisistic+oblivious
----------------------------
COMMENTS:
Never thought about this aspect! Potent sentence and etymology with an even more powerful verboticism. Powerful creation! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-24: 10:50:00
I like the sound of it. - purpleartichokes, 2008-03-24: 14:07:00
Nice word. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-03-24: 19:48:00
----------------------------
Abspirited
Created by: Saylor
Pronunciation: ab-spirited
Sentence: Jack was always abspirited during our meetings. He never paid any attention.
Etymology: absent + spirit = abspirited. Absent in spirit only.
Spectraitor
Created by: Jabberwocky
Pronunciation: spec/tray/tur
Sentence: John attended the morning meeting merely as a spectraitor. He successfully sabotaged establishing the agenda for the day.
Etymology: spectator (onlooker) + traitor (subversive element)
----------------------------
COMMENTS:
Wow! I admire the way you select words and put them together in your sentence and verboticisms so that we don't just read and understand ... they also evoke feelings and emotions ... of all kinds. Not only is your sentence and word right on the definition, but evokes that antipathy we all feel when it happens. Outstanding verboticism! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-24: 10:32:00
Cleverly constructed word. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-03-24: 19:49:00
...now if he could only get the competition to pay him for sabotaging the meetings. Hmmm. Nice word! - Tigger, 2008-03-24: 21:16:00
----------------------------
Comments:
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James
arrrteest - 2008-03-24: 07:46:00
This is a poem I actually wrote in a meeting:
Meeting Hell
By David E. Selvin
As I sit here in this meeting,
My mind's attention span is fleeting,
I contemplate actually retreating,
From this place in meeting hell.
But from the clock, it's click and clocking,
My state of mind, it keeps on mocking,
My inner scream, to me, is shocking,
As I hallucinate the ending bell.
Still, I came with no allusion,
Complicit in my blind collusion,
For my schedule’s planned intrusion,
That I’ve come to accept, but dread.
I arrive and check the seating,
Politely smile and say a greeting,
Knowing sanity will take a beating,
Within the confines of my weary head.
Still, although, I'm stuck here sitting,
My stomach lining must be pitting,
A straight jacket soon just might be fitting,
And only time will surely tell.
I hope a response is not required,
They might notice sanity expired,
And ability to reason duly mired,
My interest level a labored sell.
I awake: Is it a nightmare?
I catch myself with an insipid blank stare,
Hearing talking though the stale air,
Not all sure where it’s coming from.
Try to focus. What is the topic?
The planner’s plans were quite myopic,
My mind is on an island tropic,
My body sits here limp and numb.
I hope I don’t get called to answer,
My pulse would rise as if a dancer,
My body pained as if full with cancer,
Reacting like a hammered thumb.
A sympathetic nod of head,
Seems to follow just what is said,
But an EEG would read out "dead,"
An indication not all is well.
I'm not sure what I gain from training,
For what topic that it's pertaining,
The whole experience is very draining,
My angst is what I need to quell.
My angst is what I need to quell.
Excellent poem arrrteest! It insubordinuttily captures the disenwaged spirit of a slacktendant agendabender. ~ James
Jamagra - 2008-03-24: 09:19:00
Quoth the employee, "Nevermore!"
silveryaspen - 2008-03-24: 11:07:00
Remistram and James, your definition and cartoon are a big hit! They not only inspired great verboticisms (not a bad one in the bunch again) but even poetry! Laughter, too! Great job!
silveryaspen - 2008-03-24: 11:10:00
Did you write your poem in a meeting hell, arrrteest? It is a wonderfully well done rhyme and adds much to our time here today! I'm so glad you shared it with us.
arrrteest - 2008-03-24: 13:36:00
Write it in meeting hell? Yes, I did! It was a mind numbing, pointless, poorly thought out, going through the motions, no followthrough afterwards, dead in the water, series of meetings/"trainings" that is enherent within large organizations. It was complete with "activators," "capture sheets" and "group participation." Aaaah phoey. You bet. Am I sarred for life? Well let's just say the poem saved me from $$$$ of therapy. If you want to be productive and positive in a meeting, don't sit next to me. LOL!
purpleartichokes - 2008-03-24: 16:00:00
Great poem arrrteest! I think I was at that meeting.
Jamagra - 2008-03-24: 16:41:00
Wow Arteest! Glad you have writing as an outlet from meeting hell! I really do NOT miss those days!
arrrteest - 2008-03-24: 17:22:00
"inherent"-ah an errant moment
wayoffcenter - 2009-01-14: 04:40:00
but your word is not in your sentence...
wayoffcenter - 2009-01-14: 04:46:00
Sorry, comment in wrong spot (and I used to laugh at people who made this mistake) Comment was meant for Illoiterite.
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James