Vote for the best verboticism.

'Our boss said I had to attend this meeting.'

DEFINITION: v. To arrive at a meeting completely unprepared and then work diligently and obviously to distract yourself from the proceedings. n. A person who attends a meeting but does not believe that they are paid enough to actually pay attention.

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Verboticisms

Click on each verboticism to read the sentences created by the Verbotomy writers, and to see your voting options...

You have two votes. Click on the words to read the details, then vote your favorite.

Attentiondeficitdisbursement

Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: at/ten/sion/de/fi/cit/dis/burse/ment

Sentence: Whenever Joe showed up at a meeting and found out that he wasn't being paid enough per hour for his computer expertise his ADD (attentiondeficitdisbursement) condition would suddenly act up until he felt he was being properly compensated.

Etymology: ADD + attention deficit disorder + disbursement (payment)

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COMMENTS:

It took some original thought to ADD up those words into a very unique creation! Clever! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-24: 10:06:00

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Contratendant

Created by: doseydotes

Pronunciation: ˈkän-trə-ˈten-dənt

Sentence: Lars spent the entire meeting paging through the Wall Street Journal and humming absently to himself, to his son's 5th grade teacher's great consternation. "Mr. Beauregard!" she exclaimed, "I can't believe you would be such a contratendant to this parent-teacher conference!"

Etymology: From the Greek, contra, meaning an illegal association with a Middle-Eastern dictatorship; from the Kusumapura, ten, meaning "of brace-wearing age"; and from the Irish, dant, meaning, "shall not," or, literally, "dare not."

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COMMENTS:

Your etymologies are always so very enlightening. Superlatively done. Keep up the good work! - stache, 2008-03-24: 14:30:00

Close to the mark! - OZZIEBOB, 2008-03-24: 19:50:00

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Trystolackadaisicalist

Created by: VigilanteLexicant

Pronunciation: TRIHST-o-LAK-a-DAYZ-a-kull-ihst.

Sentence: Jeremiah was prone to being a trystolackadaisicalist; he attended meetings but clearly didn't care one whit about what went on there.

Etymology: From tryst (an agreement to meet at a certain time and place) and lackadaisical (lazy or uncaring).

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Muteinear

petaj

Created by: petaj

Pronunciation: mutineer

Sentence: Lara's selective deafness was not causing as much of a problem in the Dyslexia Association meetings as she would have liked. As a muteinear she had only lent half an ear to proceedings and the minutes she prepared appeared to be written in anagrams. She thought this would show them all the contempt she felt for the meetings. However, as most of the attendees were dyslexic they found her anagramatic minutes actually made easy reading.

Etymology: mute (not speaking as one does in a meeting) + in ear (not listening either) + mutineer (one who rebels) + the whole word looks like the minutes have been sabotaged to make them difficult to read.

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COMMENTS:

I admire the interplay between your pronunciation and etymology as well as the words you chose to blend so cleverly and the way you defined them. Muteinear and mutineer really nailed the definition, too. Outstanding word! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-24: 01:47:00

petaj Minuteering can be as difficult as climbing a mountain! when you have a mute in ear. Thanks silvery for the thoughtful comments you make on verbotomies. - petaj, 2008-03-24: 06:33:00

Great word! - purpleartichokes, 2008-03-24: 08:29:00

Dyslexics Untie! Funny sentence, petaj. - Tigger, 2008-03-24: 21:19:00

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Dislaction

Created by: Biscotti

Pronunciation: dys-lack-shun

Sentence: John was a severe dislaction when he showed up to the quarterly report meeting dressed up in a gorilla suit and screaming "Guerilla warfare, recruit the monkies!!" Needless to say, he was dragged away on possible terrorism charges and lost his job.

Etymology: distraction (getting other's attention away from the problem at hand) + slacker (one who is consistently lazy)

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COMMENTS:

Entertainalicious! - doseydotes, 2008-03-24: 17:08:00

Roared with laughter ... Great creates! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-24: 21:16:00

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Blunderachiever

Created by: Tigger

Pronunciation: /BLUN-der-uh-chee-ver/

Sentence: Scott was a consistent blunderachiever at work. Last week he brought his newpaper to the project meeting, read the comics, and he even laughed out loud a few times during the status review. Then he started on his crossword puzzle — he leaned over and whispered to Jennifer "Psst, what's a 4-letter word for 'silence'?" and when she told him to "Hush!" he just just nodded and said, "Hey, thanks."

Etymology: Blunder - to move or act blindly, stupidly (from Old Norse, blundra "shut one's eyes") + Underachiever - a person who performs below expectations (under "below" & achieve "attain through effort")

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COMMENTS:

Scott was no doubt suffering from delusions of adequacy. He should consider taking up farming where he'd no doubt be truly outstanding in his field. - Mustang, 2008-03-24: 05:35:00

petaj Scott was once a pasture tending his flock, but he was vergerly a nave and they all flocked off. - petaj, 2008-03-24: 06:41:00

I admire and enjoy the chuckles your witty sentence and word brings. I always learn a little something from your etymology when you include the word's country of origin. As always, very nice creation! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-24: 10:00:00

Amusing sentence; nice word, too - OZZIEBOB, 2008-03-24: 19:52:00

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Attennot

Created by: spotthecat1

Pronunciation: uh-ten-not

Sentence: Mrs. Persnickety sent her most recent intern in the archival section of the expired copyright department to the monthly Budget/Appropriations Committee meeting. Dan Slouth, a soon to be ex-student at Bozo Community College, sauntered off to attennot the meeting with his ipod and suduko in hand.

Etymology: M.E.: attencioun + M.E.: nought

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COMMENTS:

Like it a lot! Great sentence. Right on the definition. Excellent Verboticism! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-24: 21:22:00

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Illoiterite

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: ill-OYT-er-ite

Sentence: An inveterate illoiterite, Brandon typically comes to the staff meeting totally unprepared, disinterested and withdrawn, chosing to read his sports magazine rather than to participate in the proceedings.

Etymology: Blend of 'illiterate' (displaying a marked lack of knowledge in a particular field) and 'loiter' (to linger aimlessly or as if aimless in or about a place) with the suffix 'ite' (Adherent or follower of)

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Attendunce

CrayonWarrior

Created by: CrayonWarrior

Pronunciation: X-SAMPA - QtendVns At-end-un-s

Sentence: Margaret was a real attendunce. she would show up at a meeting and sit there playing on her IPhone, with no clue as to anything going on around her

Etymology: Attend - to be present Dunce - a fool

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Offassoffender

Created by: silveryaspen

Pronunciation: off - ass - uhf - end - er

Sentence: Once in awhile, an office has an offassoffender, who slacks off, and sluffs off, his work onto others. He is unready and unwilling to go to the meeting table. Off-timed, he strolls in with nothing, and mouths off, spewing off the cuff, off the peg, off the wall remarks, many of them off key, off color, and offensive. The boss finally had enoff. He offed him ... he took him off the books, and right off the job! That was the end of awful Mr. Offalhead.

Etymology: Office, Ass, Offender,

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COMMENTS:

That horse's patoot was no doubt the butt of many jokes over the water cooler. The boss was right to expel that stinker from the offeces. - Mustang, 2008-03-24: 05:31:00

Those puns are just offal. - stache, 2008-03-24: 10:05:00

Offally amusing! - spotthecat1, 2008-03-24: 16:28:00

Very clever and amusing. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-03-24: 19:53:00

Don't think I've ever heard anyone being called an "Offalhead" before. It's very 'PC'and I may just use it when talking about some Offassoffenders I know. ;) - Tigger, 2008-03-24: 20:18:00

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2008-03-24: 00:01:00
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James

arrrteest - 2008-03-24: 07:46:00
This is a poem I actually wrote in a meeting:

Meeting Hell
By David E. Selvin

As I sit here in this meeting,
My mind's attention span is fleeting,
I contemplate actually retreating,
From this place in meeting hell.

But from the clock, it's click and clocking,
My state of mind, it keeps on mocking,
My inner scream, to me, is shocking,
As I hallucinate the ending bell.

Still, I came with no allusion,
Complicit in my blind collusion,
For my schedule’s planned intrusion,
That I’ve come to accept, but dread.

I arrive and check the seating,
Politely smile and say a greeting,
Knowing sanity will take a beating,
Within the confines of my weary head.

Still, although, I'm stuck here sitting,
My stomach lining must be pitting,
A straight jacket soon just might be fitting,
And only time will surely tell.

I hope a response is not required,
They might notice sanity expired,
And ability to reason duly mired,
My interest level a labored sell.

I awake: Is it a nightmare?
I catch myself with an insipid blank stare,
Hearing talking though the stale air,
Not all sure where it’s coming from.

Try to focus. What is the topic?
The planner’s plans were quite myopic,
My mind is on an island tropic,
My body sits here limp and numb.

I hope I don’t get called to answer,
My pulse would rise as if a dancer,
My body pained as if full with cancer,
Reacting like a hammered thumb.

A sympathetic nod of head,
Seems to follow just what is said,
But an EEG would read out "dead,"
An indication not all is well.

I'm not sure what I gain from training,
For what topic that it's pertaining,
The whole experience is very draining,
My angst is what I need to quell.
My angst is what I need to quell.

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2008-03-24: 08:40:00
Excellent poem arrrteest! It insubordinuttily captures the disenwaged spirit of a slacktendant agendabender. ~ James

Jamagra - 2008-03-24: 09:19:00
Quoth the employee, "Nevermore!"

silveryaspen - 2008-03-24: 11:07:00
Remistram and James, your definition and cartoon are a big hit! They not only inspired great verboticisms (not a bad one in the bunch again) but even poetry! Laughter, too! Great job!

silveryaspen - 2008-03-24: 11:10:00
Did you write your poem in a meeting hell, arrrteest? It is a wonderfully well done rhyme and adds much to our time here today! I'm so glad you shared it with us.

arrrteest - 2008-03-24: 13:36:00
Write it in meeting hell? Yes, I did! It was a mind numbing, pointless, poorly thought out, going through the motions, no followthrough afterwards, dead in the water, series of meetings/"trainings" that is enherent within large organizations. It was complete with "activators," "capture sheets" and "group participation." Aaaah phoey. You bet. Am I sarred for life? Well let's just say the poem saved me from $$$$ of therapy. If you want to be productive and positive in a meeting, don't sit next to me. LOL!

purpleartichokes - 2008-03-24: 16:00:00
Great poem arrrteest! I think I was at that meeting.

Jamagra - 2008-03-24: 16:41:00
Wow Arteest! Glad you have writing as an outlet from meeting hell! I really do NOT miss those days!

arrrteest - 2008-03-24: 17:22:00
"inherent"-ah an errant moment

wayoffcenter - 2009-01-14: 04:40:00
but your word is not in your sentence...

wayoffcenter - 2009-01-14: 04:46:00
Sorry, comment in wrong spot (and I used to laugh at people who made this mistake) Comment was meant for Illoiterite.

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-05-31: 00:30:00
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James