Vote for the best verboticism.

'Our boss said I had to attend this meeting.'

DEFINITION: v. To arrive at a meeting completely unprepared and then work diligently and obviously to distract yourself from the proceedings. n. A person who attends a meeting but does not believe that they are paid enough to actually pay attention.

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Verboticisms

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Offassoffender

Created by: silveryaspen

Pronunciation: off - ass - uhf - end - er

Sentence: Once in awhile, an office has an offassoffender, who slacks off, and sluffs off, his work onto others. He is unready and unwilling to go to the meeting table. Off-timed, he strolls in with nothing, and mouths off, spewing off the cuff, off the peg, off the wall remarks, many of them off key, off color, and offensive. The boss finally had enoff. He offed him ... he took him off the books, and right off the job! That was the end of awful Mr. Offalhead.

Etymology: Office, Ass, Offender,

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COMMENTS:

That horse's patoot was no doubt the butt of many jokes over the water cooler. The boss was right to expel that stinker from the offeces. - Mustang, 2008-03-24: 05:31:00

Those puns are just offal. - stache, 2008-03-24: 10:05:00

Offally amusing! - spotthecat1, 2008-03-24: 16:28:00

Very clever and amusing. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-03-24: 19:53:00

Don't think I've ever heard anyone being called an "Offalhead" before. It's very 'PC'and I may just use it when talking about some Offassoffenders I know. ;) - Tigger, 2008-03-24: 20:18:00

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Innattention

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: In at ten shun

Sentence: Oliver worked for Hilton Hotel Chain as it's IT Chief. He never felt he had to be part of the boring day-to-day matters. Holding them hostage with his superior electronic intelligence, he attended the meetings he was summoned to and ignored everyone and everything. He was guilty of innattention. In fact he had a history of it...when he worked for the sanitation department, he was guilty of binattention. When he worked for the Symphony, it was violinattention; for Lufthansa, it was berlinattention. And when he worked for Tanqueray, he was guilty of ginattention; for the bank, pinattention and for the Las Vegas Tourist Board, it was sinattention. Do you think this is maybe why he'd been fired so often?

Etymology: Inn (hotel) & Inattention (lack of attention)

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Misfittendee

Created by: rebelvin

Pronunciation: miss-fit-tend-he

Sentence: There is always some misfittendee there who is obviously not with the program.

Etymology: misfit+attendee

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Recalcityroaf

metrohumanx

Created by: metrohumanx

Pronunciation: ree-cal-sit-TIE-roaf (recalcityroafette)

Sentence: The Library Dominatrix had forced Jeff to abandon his personal feifdom and attend a typically bogus meeting at the Megastructure. Unkemp and unconcerned, Jeff was only a RECALCI-TYROAF compared to the rest of us who had suffered through endless vapid meetings totally devoid of meaning or productivity. Jeff's casual insolence marked him for what he was...a mere amateur at the subtle art of boss-baiting. His five-minute Pornopoint Presentation only brought him a week in the cooler. Years of administrative harassment had converted our workplace into an academic version of a prisoner of war camp, and our subtle sarcasm, subliminal suggestions and underground campaign of disinformation had led to the total breakdown of more than one camp administrator. Totally lacking subtlety, Jeff's blatant insolence and goon-baiting drew the Commandant's attention while we discreetly falsified memos, released budgies, and planted several alarm clocks timed to disrupt our annual Staff Appreciation Day. So even a RECALCI-TYROAF has a place in the great SCHEME of things. They never DID discover the tunnel.

Etymology: RECALCItrant+TYRo+OAF=RECALCITYROAF....RECALCITRANT:: obstinately defiant of authority or restraint,difficult to manage or train,not responsive to treatment; Late Latin recalcitrant-, recalcitrans, present participle of recalcitrare to be stubbornly disobedient, from Latin, to kick back, from re- + calcitrare to kick, from calc-, calx heel.....TYRO:a beginner in learning,one inept at insubordination;Medieval Latin, from Latin tiro young soldier, tyro.....OAF:a stupid person, a boob,a big clumsy slow-witted person; alteration of auf, alfe goblin's child, probably from Middle English alven, elven elf, fairy, from Old English elfen nymphs; akin to Old English ælf elf.

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx Rats! The word "city" seems too pronounced- I wanted more emphasis on "tyro". I'll try to do better, gang. - metrohumanx, 2009-01-14: 01:21:00

metrohumanx Free online books here: http://www.gutenberg.org/catalog/ - metrohumanx, 2009-01-14: 02:05:00

I tried to say that three times and broke my tongue....but I still like it. - Mustang, 2009-01-14: 17:57:00

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Onslacker

Created by: leechdude

Pronunciation: on- slaker

Sentence: The onslacker didn't mind the meeting until his boss had fired him.

Etymology: onlooker, slacker

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COMMENTS:

Lot of originality in your choice of words for your etymology. Good verboticism. - silveryaspen, 2008-03-24: 21:18:00

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Reprezzzzzentative

Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: rep rez ent eh tiv

Sentence: The bosses' reprezzzzzzentative sneered his way through the nahgenda.

Etymology: representative zzzzzzzzzzz.

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COMMENTS:

I love 'nahgenda' — it really epitomizes meetings where nothing is accomplished. - Tigger, 2008-03-24: 21:11:00

Very innovative etymology and creations! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-24: 21:28:00

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Dissforum

Created by: TJayzz

Pronunciation: Diss-for-rum

Sentence: Tony thought he was worth much more than his salary so when he had to attend a meeting he decided he would dissforum it by attending but paying no attention whatsoever.

Etymology: Diss(disrespect) + Forum(a meeting or exchange of views) = Dissforum

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COMMENTS:

as soon as I saw your word I thought of decorum which would work well in your etymology - great word - Jabberwocky, 2009-01-14: 16:17:00

Great create! - silveryaspen, 2009-01-15: 01:41:00

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Clusterduck

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: kləstərdək

Sentence: Ron is pretty good at working alone but when it comes to meetings he's a clusterduck. If he attends at all, he is about as useful as a bent paperclip.

Etymology: cluster (a group of people or similar objects positioned or occurring close together) + duck (lower the head or the body quickly to avoid a blow or so as not to be seen) Also a derivative of another common term that starts with cluster.

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COMMENTS:

I know that guy! - otherguy, 2009-01-14: 08:02:00

I think we all know that guy... - Nosila, 2009-01-15: 00:13:00

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Disenwage

Created by: OZZIEBOB

Pronunciation: dis-en-WEYJ

Sentence: When Bob's eyes looked upon the bonuslessness of his salary cheque, he knew that tomorrow's monthly, marathon meeting would be a day full of disenwagement.

Etymology: With "disengagement" in mind, a blend of DIS+EN: to free oneself from & WAGE: Venturing, undertaking participating and WAGE: salary, reward, payment. COGNATES:DISENWAGEMENT, DISENWAGING, DISENWAGEE.

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COMMENTS:

petaj Bob was completely disincentivized and unmotiveized - petaj, 2008-03-24: 06:35:00

Short sentence but the powerful words and verboticims are put together so well it is very potent in conveying that feeling of being unappreciated being the reason for disenwaging. Great angle on this topic. Great word! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-24: 10:11:00

Versatile word — could also be used to describe what people do when they go gambling in 'Lost Wages', Nevada, US (nickname for Las Vegas). - Tigger, 2008-03-24: 20:24:00

missed this yesterday - very apt - Jabberwocky, 2008-03-25: 12:19:00

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Abspirited

Created by: Saylor

Pronunciation: ab-spirited

Sentence: Jack was always abspirited during our meetings. He never paid any attention.

Etymology: absent + spirit = abspirited. Absent in spirit only.

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2008-03-24: 00:01:00
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James

arrrteest - 2008-03-24: 07:46:00
This is a poem I actually wrote in a meeting:

Meeting Hell
By David E. Selvin

As I sit here in this meeting,
My mind's attention span is fleeting,
I contemplate actually retreating,
From this place in meeting hell.

But from the clock, it's click and clocking,
My state of mind, it keeps on mocking,
My inner scream, to me, is shocking,
As I hallucinate the ending bell.

Still, I came with no allusion,
Complicit in my blind collusion,
For my schedule’s planned intrusion,
That I’ve come to accept, but dread.

I arrive and check the seating,
Politely smile and say a greeting,
Knowing sanity will take a beating,
Within the confines of my weary head.

Still, although, I'm stuck here sitting,
My stomach lining must be pitting,
A straight jacket soon just might be fitting,
And only time will surely tell.

I hope a response is not required,
They might notice sanity expired,
And ability to reason duly mired,
My interest level a labored sell.

I awake: Is it a nightmare?
I catch myself with an insipid blank stare,
Hearing talking though the stale air,
Not all sure where it’s coming from.

Try to focus. What is the topic?
The planner’s plans were quite myopic,
My mind is on an island tropic,
My body sits here limp and numb.

I hope I don’t get called to answer,
My pulse would rise as if a dancer,
My body pained as if full with cancer,
Reacting like a hammered thumb.

A sympathetic nod of head,
Seems to follow just what is said,
But an EEG would read out "dead,"
An indication not all is well.

I'm not sure what I gain from training,
For what topic that it's pertaining,
The whole experience is very draining,
My angst is what I need to quell.
My angst is what I need to quell.

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2008-03-24: 08:40:00
Excellent poem arrrteest! It insubordinuttily captures the disenwaged spirit of a slacktendant agendabender. ~ James

Jamagra - 2008-03-24: 09:19:00
Quoth the employee, "Nevermore!"

silveryaspen - 2008-03-24: 11:07:00
Remistram and James, your definition and cartoon are a big hit! They not only inspired great verboticisms (not a bad one in the bunch again) but even poetry! Laughter, too! Great job!

silveryaspen - 2008-03-24: 11:10:00
Did you write your poem in a meeting hell, arrrteest? It is a wonderfully well done rhyme and adds much to our time here today! I'm so glad you shared it with us.

arrrteest - 2008-03-24: 13:36:00
Write it in meeting hell? Yes, I did! It was a mind numbing, pointless, poorly thought out, going through the motions, no followthrough afterwards, dead in the water, series of meetings/"trainings" that is enherent within large organizations. It was complete with "activators," "capture sheets" and "group participation." Aaaah phoey. You bet. Am I sarred for life? Well let's just say the poem saved me from $$$$ of therapy. If you want to be productive and positive in a meeting, don't sit next to me. LOL!

purpleartichokes - 2008-03-24: 16:00:00
Great poem arrrteest! I think I was at that meeting.

Jamagra - 2008-03-24: 16:41:00
Wow Arteest! Glad you have writing as an outlet from meeting hell! I really do NOT miss those days!

arrrteest - 2008-03-24: 17:22:00
"inherent"-ah an errant moment

wayoffcenter - 2009-01-14: 04:40:00
but your word is not in your sentence...

wayoffcenter - 2009-01-14: 04:46:00
Sorry, comment in wrong spot (and I used to laugh at people who made this mistake) Comment was meant for Illoiterite.

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-05-31: 00:30:00
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James