Vote for the best verboticism.
DEFINITION: v. To arrive at a meeting completely unprepared and then work diligently and obviously to distract yourself from the proceedings. n. A person who attends a meeting but does not believe that they are paid enough to actually pay attention.
Verboticisms
Click on each verboticism to read the sentences created by the Verbotomy writers, and to see your voting options...
You have two votes. Click on the words to read the details, then vote your favorite.
Offassoffender
Created by: silveryaspen
Pronunciation: off - ass - uhf - end - er
Sentence: Once in awhile, an office has an offassoffender, who slacks off, and sluffs off, his work onto others. He is unready and unwilling to go to the meeting table. Off-timed, he strolls in with nothing, and mouths off, spewing off the cuff, off the peg, off the wall remarks, many of them off key, off color, and offensive. The boss finally had enoff. He offed him ... he took him off the books, and right off the job! That was the end of awful Mr. Offalhead.
Etymology: Office, Ass, Offender,
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COMMENTS:
That horse's patoot was no doubt the butt of many jokes over the water cooler. The boss was right to expel that stinker from the offeces. - Mustang, 2008-03-24: 05:31:00
Those puns are just offal. - stache, 2008-03-24: 10:05:00
Offally amusing! - spotthecat1, 2008-03-24: 16:28:00
Very clever and amusing. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-03-24: 19:53:00
Don't think I've ever heard anyone being called an "Offalhead" before. It's very 'PC'and I may just use it when talking about some Offassoffenders I know. ;) - Tigger, 2008-03-24: 20:18:00
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Dislaction
Created by: Biscotti
Pronunciation: dys-lack-shun
Sentence: John was a severe dislaction when he showed up to the quarterly report meeting dressed up in a gorilla suit and screaming "Guerilla warfare, recruit the monkies!!" Needless to say, he was dragged away on possible terrorism charges and lost his job.
Etymology: distraction (getting other's attention away from the problem at hand) + slacker (one who is consistently lazy)
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COMMENTS:
Entertainalicious! - doseydotes, 2008-03-24: 17:08:00
Roared with laughter ... Great creates! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-24: 21:16:00
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Onslacker
Created by: leechdude
Pronunciation: on- slaker
Sentence: The onslacker didn't mind the meeting until his boss had fired him.
Etymology: onlooker, slacker
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COMMENTS:
Lot of originality in your choice of words for your etymology. Good verboticism. - silveryaspen, 2008-03-24: 21:18:00
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Procrasturbate
Created by: youmustvotenato
Pronunciation: pro-crass-stir-bate
Sentence: Rick whipped out his phone and commenced forth to procrasturbate during the meeting, much to the chagrin of corporate. Rick, of course, worked in IT.
Etymology: procrastinate and mast**bate.
Illoiterite
Created by: Mustang
Pronunciation: ill-OYT-er-ite
Sentence: An inveterate illoiterite, Thurgood typically came to the staff meeting totally unprepared, disinterested and withdrawn, chosing to read his girly magazine rather than to participate in the proceedings.
Etymology: Blend of 'illiterate' (displaying a marked lack of knowledge in a particular field) and 'loiter' (to linger aimlessly or as if aimless in or about a place) with the suffix 'ite' (Adherent or follower of)
Innattention
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: In at ten shun
Sentence: Oliver worked for Hilton Hotel Chain as it's IT Chief. He never felt he had to be part of the boring day-to-day matters. Holding them hostage with his superior electronic intelligence, he attended the meetings he was summoned to and ignored everyone and everything. He was guilty of innattention. In fact he had a history of it...when he worked for the sanitation department, he was guilty of binattention. When he worked for the Symphony, it was violinattention; for Lufthansa, it was berlinattention. And when he worked for Tanqueray, he was guilty of ginattention; for the bank, pinattention and for the Las Vegas Tourist Board, it was sinattention. Do you think this is maybe why he'd been fired so often?
Etymology: Inn (hotel) & Inattention (lack of attention)
Convennui
Created by: stache
Pronunciation: kən-vēn'-wē'
Sentence: Having finished the crossword, sudoku and cryptoquote, Mervin was left to endure the remainder of the meeting in a tortured state of convennui.....OK, fine, this is a noun, not a verb. Take this: There was a young lawyer named Bree, Who practiced up in Kankakee. In the docket meeting, her interest was fleeting: She had a case of convennui. Whatever, dude.
Etymology: convene,to meet, Middle English convenen, from Old French convenir, from Latin convenīre, + ennui, boredom, from Old French enui, from ennuyer, to annoy, bore
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COMMENTS:
hehe! - purpleartichokes, 2008-03-24: 10:46:00
Fine job on the pronunciation. Your sentence is a double dose of hitting the definition, once in prose and once in rhyme ... you really fit everything in this time! Love the French flair in your etymology and verboticism. So well put together. Excellent! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-24: 10:46:00
Enui-ne-scrumptious, as usual, stache. - doseydotes, 2008-03-24: 17:21:00
Mervin sounds like a real Convennuinie (pron. con-ven-wee'-nee). - Tigger, 2008-03-24: 21:05:00
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Disenwage
Created by: OZZIEBOB
Pronunciation: dis-en-WEYJ
Sentence: When Bob's eyes looked upon the bonuslessness of his salary cheque, he knew that tomorrow's monthly, marathon meeting would be a day full of disenwagement.
Etymology: With "disengagement" in mind, a blend of DIS+EN: to free oneself from & WAGE: Venturing, undertaking participating and WAGE: salary, reward, payment. COGNATES:DISENWAGEMENT, DISENWAGING, DISENWAGEE.
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COMMENTS:
Bob was completely disincentivized and unmotiveized - petaj, 2008-03-24: 06:35:00
Short sentence but the powerful words and verboticims are put together so well it is very potent in conveying that feeling of being unappreciated being the reason for disenwaging. Great angle on this topic. Great word! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-24: 10:11:00
Versatile word — could also be used to describe what people do when they go gambling in 'Lost Wages', Nevada, US (nickname for Las Vegas). - Tigger, 2008-03-24: 20:24:00
missed this yesterday - very apt - Jabberwocky, 2008-03-25: 12:19:00
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Brattendee
Created by: purpleartichokes
Pronunciation: brat-tend-dee
Sentence: At every meeting, except for those where pastries were served, Joel was either the designated particican't or brattendee, believing he was worth more to the company due to his liberal arts education and extensive sales experience at Toys 'R' Us.
Etymology: brat, attendee
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COMMENTS:
Joel sounds like one who could be destined for fame and fortune.....among Hollywood's 'intellectual elite'. - Mustang, 2008-03-24: 05:45:00
Brings new meaning to the expression toy boy. Great choice of words and great job of blending them. Brat fits plus brings out all those feelings that go with it. Using 'brat' in your verboticism was brilliant! Exceptional verboticism! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-24: 10:38:00
Good one and an added bonus of particican't. Love it. - arrrteest, 2008-03-24: 11:34:00
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Agendabender
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: ah jenda ben der
Sentence: Todd was a first class Agendabender. He hated meetings with a passion and felt they were a waste of time. Sometimes they had meetings just to decide when the next meeting would be! He was considered a renegade for not wanting to attend the meetings, he felt it cut into his time at work. Iromically, those persons who convened meetings ad nauseum, just want to hear their own voices and ideas and apparently did not have enough real work to do, nor deadlines to meet. Todd analyzed what these meetings comprised: "Minutes" of the meetings should actually be called "Hours"; The "Board Room" should have been renamed The "Bored Room"; the "Chair Person" should be called the "Stare Person"...'cause they always managed to spear the attendees with their eyes; and Preparation for a meeting?...the only one anyone really needed was "Preparation H" for the long periods of time spent sitting on the hard wooden chairs! Yes, it was obvious to Todd that some people in his firm got their MBA's specializing in congregation and mind-numbing rhetoric. Unbeknownst to the other attendees, Todd's days attending these mindless marathons were soon to be ended. He had just inherited the company from his uncle and his first order of business would be to agendabender the hell out of these pointless meetings!
Etymology: agenda { a list of matters to be taken up (as at a meeting)} & bender (someone who modifies the rules to suit themselves) & genderbender (for rhyming purposes, not that there's anything wrong with that!)
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COMMENTS:
I admire your witty word plays in quotes, and your story, for they very humorously and successfully convey the feeling of frustration. Perhaps before his agendabender to ease his frustration, he went on another kind of bender! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-24: 01:35:00
Perhaps Todd is a "Boy George" fan? Clever word; luv the sentence! - OZZIEBOB, 2008-03-24: 02:26:00
Workershirker? Congrats! - readerwriter, 2009-01-14: 09:30:00
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Comments:
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James
arrrteest - 2008-03-24: 07:46:00
This is a poem I actually wrote in a meeting:
Meeting Hell
By David E. Selvin
As I sit here in this meeting,
My mind's attention span is fleeting,
I contemplate actually retreating,
From this place in meeting hell.
But from the clock, it's click and clocking,
My state of mind, it keeps on mocking,
My inner scream, to me, is shocking,
As I hallucinate the ending bell.
Still, I came with no allusion,
Complicit in my blind collusion,
For my schedule’s planned intrusion,
That I’ve come to accept, but dread.
I arrive and check the seating,
Politely smile and say a greeting,
Knowing sanity will take a beating,
Within the confines of my weary head.
Still, although, I'm stuck here sitting,
My stomach lining must be pitting,
A straight jacket soon just might be fitting,
And only time will surely tell.
I hope a response is not required,
They might notice sanity expired,
And ability to reason duly mired,
My interest level a labored sell.
I awake: Is it a nightmare?
I catch myself with an insipid blank stare,
Hearing talking though the stale air,
Not all sure where it’s coming from.
Try to focus. What is the topic?
The planner’s plans were quite myopic,
My mind is on an island tropic,
My body sits here limp and numb.
I hope I don’t get called to answer,
My pulse would rise as if a dancer,
My body pained as if full with cancer,
Reacting like a hammered thumb.
A sympathetic nod of head,
Seems to follow just what is said,
But an EEG would read out "dead,"
An indication not all is well.
I'm not sure what I gain from training,
For what topic that it's pertaining,
The whole experience is very draining,
My angst is what I need to quell.
My angst is what I need to quell.
Excellent poem arrrteest! It insubordinuttily captures the disenwaged spirit of a slacktendant agendabender. ~ James
Jamagra - 2008-03-24: 09:19:00
Quoth the employee, "Nevermore!"
silveryaspen - 2008-03-24: 11:07:00
Remistram and James, your definition and cartoon are a big hit! They not only inspired great verboticisms (not a bad one in the bunch again) but even poetry! Laughter, too! Great job!
silveryaspen - 2008-03-24: 11:10:00
Did you write your poem in a meeting hell, arrrteest? It is a wonderfully well done rhyme and adds much to our time here today! I'm so glad you shared it with us.
arrrteest - 2008-03-24: 13:36:00
Write it in meeting hell? Yes, I did! It was a mind numbing, pointless, poorly thought out, going through the motions, no followthrough afterwards, dead in the water, series of meetings/"trainings" that is enherent within large organizations. It was complete with "activators," "capture sheets" and "group participation." Aaaah phoey. You bet. Am I sarred for life? Well let's just say the poem saved me from $$$$ of therapy. If you want to be productive and positive in a meeting, don't sit next to me. LOL!
purpleartichokes - 2008-03-24: 16:00:00
Great poem arrrteest! I think I was at that meeting.
Jamagra - 2008-03-24: 16:41:00
Wow Arteest! Glad you have writing as an outlet from meeting hell! I really do NOT miss those days!
arrrteest - 2008-03-24: 17:22:00
"inherent"-ah an errant moment
wayoffcenter - 2009-01-14: 04:40:00
but your word is not in your sentence...
wayoffcenter - 2009-01-14: 04:46:00
Sorry, comment in wrong spot (and I used to laugh at people who made this mistake) Comment was meant for Illoiterite.
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James