Vote for the best verboticism.
DEFINITION: v. To arrive at a meeting completely unprepared and then work diligently and obviously to distract yourself from the proceedings. n. A person who attends a meeting but does not believe that they are paid enough to actually pay attention.
Verboticisms
Click on each verboticism to read the sentences created by the Verbotomy writers, and to see your voting options...
You have two votes. Click on the words to read the details, then vote your favorite.
Illoiterite
Created by: Mustang
Pronunciation: ill-OYT-er-ite
Sentence: An inveterate illoiterite, Thurgood typically came to the staff meeting totally unprepared, disinterested and withdrawn, chosing to read his girly magazine rather than to participate in the proceedings.
Etymology: Blend of 'illiterate' (displaying a marked lack of knowledge in a particular field) and 'loiter' (to linger aimlessly or as if aimless in or about a place) with the suffix 'ite' (Adherent or follower of)
Misfittendee
Created by: rebelvin
Pronunciation: miss-fit-tend-he
Sentence: There is always some misfittendee there who is obviously not with the program.
Etymology: misfit+attendee
Clusterduck
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: kləstərdək
Sentence: Ron is pretty good at working alone but when it comes to meetings he's a clusterduck. If he attends at all, he is about as useful as a bent paperclip.
Etymology: cluster (a group of people or similar objects positioned or occurring close together) + duck (lower the head or the body quickly to avoid a blow or so as not to be seen) Also a derivative of another common term that starts with cluster.
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COMMENTS:
I know that guy! - otherguy, 2009-01-14: 08:02:00
I think we all know that guy... - Nosila, 2009-01-15: 00:13:00
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Procrasturbate
Created by: youmustvotenato
Pronunciation: pro-crass-stir-bate
Sentence: Rick whipped out his phone and commenced forth to procrasturbate during the meeting, much to the chagrin of corporate. Rick, of course, worked in IT.
Etymology: procrastinate and mast**bate.
Oblividude
Created by: kashman
Pronunciation: Oblee-vee-Dude
Sentence: Michael's was the oblividude of the whole office, as apart from arriving late for the meetings he never took any action items during the meetings.
Etymology: Oblivious (lacking meaningful attention) + Dude
Attendunce
Created by: galwaywegian
Pronunciation: att en dunsssss
Sentence: His attendunce record snored for itself
Etymology: attendance dunce
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COMMENTS:
Excellent! Simply great and easy to remember. luv the sentence, too. - silveryaspen, 2009-01-14: 12:12:00
I like this word and voted for it. But wonder if we worry about the words being the "right" parts of speech as called for... - readerwriter, 2009-01-14: 15:57:00
Great...I'm sure we all atend meetings with these duds, I mean dudes! - Nosila, 2009-01-15: 00:12:00
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Slacktendant
Created by: arrrteest
Pronunciation: slak-tend-ent
Sentence: Everyone who arrived at the meeting on time took a poll as to see what Jeff would bring with him to prove he was worthy of his slacktendant title. Two out of the four members who were there thought he would bring a copy of the latest anime or manga magazine he was sharing with Whistler from accounting. One said he would probably write emails and text his girlfriend on his Blackberry, while another said it had been a while since the last time he clipped his fingernails and toenails and plucked his nosehairs. Last Monday he brought the New York Times crossword puzzle and kept shouting out the words when he got them or muttering the clues under his breath.
Etymology: slacker (one who shirks work) + attendant (one who is present)
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COMMENTS:
Your sentence and word fit together, and fit the definition, like a hand in a glove Very well done! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-24: 01:40:00
You've no doubt met my brother in law, Mervyn? Great word! - Mustang, 2008-03-24: 06:13:00
Sorry, Mustang, I misspelled 'Mervyn' in my sentence. - stache, 2008-03-24: 10:10:00
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Convennui
Created by: stache
Pronunciation: kən-vēn'-wē'
Sentence: Having finished the crossword, sudoku and cryptoquote, Mervin was left to endure the remainder of the meeting in a tortured state of convennui.....OK, fine, this is a noun, not a verb. Take this: There was a young lawyer named Bree, Who practiced up in Kankakee. In the docket meeting, her interest was fleeting: She had a case of convennui. Whatever, dude.
Etymology: convene,to meet, Middle English convenen, from Old French convenir, from Latin convenīre, + ennui, boredom, from Old French enui, from ennuyer, to annoy, bore
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COMMENTS:
hehe! - purpleartichokes, 2008-03-24: 10:46:00
Fine job on the pronunciation. Your sentence is a double dose of hitting the definition, once in prose and once in rhyme ... you really fit everything in this time! Love the French flair in your etymology and verboticism. So well put together. Excellent! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-24: 10:46:00
Enui-ne-scrumptious, as usual, stache. - doseydotes, 2008-03-24: 17:21:00
Mervin sounds like a real Convennuinie (pron. con-ven-wee'-nee). - Tigger, 2008-03-24: 21:05:00
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Offassoffender
Created by: silveryaspen
Pronunciation: off - ass - uhf - end - er
Sentence: Once in awhile, an office has an offassoffender, who slacks off, and sluffs off, his work onto others. He is unready and unwilling to go to the meeting table. Off-timed, he strolls in with nothing, and mouths off, spewing off the cuff, off the peg, off the wall remarks, many of them off key, off color, and offensive. The boss finally had enoff. He offed him ... he took him off the books, and right off the job! That was the end of awful Mr. Offalhead.
Etymology: Office, Ass, Offender,
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COMMENTS:
That horse's patoot was no doubt the butt of many jokes over the water cooler. The boss was right to expel that stinker from the offeces. - Mustang, 2008-03-24: 05:31:00
Those puns are just offal. - stache, 2008-03-24: 10:05:00
Offally amusing! - spotthecat1, 2008-03-24: 16:28:00
Very clever and amusing. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-03-24: 19:53:00
Don't think I've ever heard anyone being called an "Offalhead" before. It's very 'PC'and I may just use it when talking about some Offassoffenders I know. ;) - Tigger, 2008-03-24: 20:18:00
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Spectraitor
Created by: Jabberwocky
Pronunciation: spec/tray/tur
Sentence: John attended the morning meeting merely as a spectraitor. He successfully sabotaged establishing the agenda for the day.
Etymology: spectator (onlooker) + traitor (subversive element)
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COMMENTS:
Wow! I admire the way you select words and put them together in your sentence and verboticisms so that we don't just read and understand ... they also evoke feelings and emotions ... of all kinds. Not only is your sentence and word right on the definition, but evokes that antipathy we all feel when it happens. Outstanding verboticism! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-24: 10:32:00
Cleverly constructed word. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-03-24: 19:49:00
...now if he could only get the competition to pay him for sabotaging the meetings. Hmmm. Nice word! - Tigger, 2008-03-24: 21:16:00
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Comments:
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James
arrrteest - 2008-03-24: 07:46:00
This is a poem I actually wrote in a meeting:
Meeting Hell
By David E. Selvin
As I sit here in this meeting,
My mind's attention span is fleeting,
I contemplate actually retreating,
From this place in meeting hell.
But from the clock, it's click and clocking,
My state of mind, it keeps on mocking,
My inner scream, to me, is shocking,
As I hallucinate the ending bell.
Still, I came with no allusion,
Complicit in my blind collusion,
For my schedule’s planned intrusion,
That I’ve come to accept, but dread.
I arrive and check the seating,
Politely smile and say a greeting,
Knowing sanity will take a beating,
Within the confines of my weary head.
Still, although, I'm stuck here sitting,
My stomach lining must be pitting,
A straight jacket soon just might be fitting,
And only time will surely tell.
I hope a response is not required,
They might notice sanity expired,
And ability to reason duly mired,
My interest level a labored sell.
I awake: Is it a nightmare?
I catch myself with an insipid blank stare,
Hearing talking though the stale air,
Not all sure where it’s coming from.
Try to focus. What is the topic?
The planner’s plans were quite myopic,
My mind is on an island tropic,
My body sits here limp and numb.
I hope I don’t get called to answer,
My pulse would rise as if a dancer,
My body pained as if full with cancer,
Reacting like a hammered thumb.
A sympathetic nod of head,
Seems to follow just what is said,
But an EEG would read out "dead,"
An indication not all is well.
I'm not sure what I gain from training,
For what topic that it's pertaining,
The whole experience is very draining,
My angst is what I need to quell.
My angst is what I need to quell.
Excellent poem arrrteest! It insubordinuttily captures the disenwaged spirit of a slacktendant agendabender. ~ James
Jamagra - 2008-03-24: 09:19:00
Quoth the employee, "Nevermore!"
silveryaspen - 2008-03-24: 11:07:00
Remistram and James, your definition and cartoon are a big hit! They not only inspired great verboticisms (not a bad one in the bunch again) but even poetry! Laughter, too! Great job!
silveryaspen - 2008-03-24: 11:10:00
Did you write your poem in a meeting hell, arrrteest? It is a wonderfully well done rhyme and adds much to our time here today! I'm so glad you shared it with us.
arrrteest - 2008-03-24: 13:36:00
Write it in meeting hell? Yes, I did! It was a mind numbing, pointless, poorly thought out, going through the motions, no followthrough afterwards, dead in the water, series of meetings/"trainings" that is enherent within large organizations. It was complete with "activators," "capture sheets" and "group participation." Aaaah phoey. You bet. Am I sarred for life? Well let's just say the poem saved me from $$$$ of therapy. If you want to be productive and positive in a meeting, don't sit next to me. LOL!
purpleartichokes - 2008-03-24: 16:00:00
Great poem arrrteest! I think I was at that meeting.
Jamagra - 2008-03-24: 16:41:00
Wow Arteest! Glad you have writing as an outlet from meeting hell! I really do NOT miss those days!
arrrteest - 2008-03-24: 17:22:00
"inherent"-ah an errant moment
wayoffcenter - 2009-01-14: 04:40:00
but your word is not in your sentence...
wayoffcenter - 2009-01-14: 04:46:00
Sorry, comment in wrong spot (and I used to laugh at people who made this mistake) Comment was meant for Illoiterite.
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James