Vote for the best verboticism.
DEFINITION: v. To arrive at a meeting completely unprepared and then work diligently and obviously to distract yourself from the proceedings. n. A person who attends a meeting but does not believe that they are paid enough to actually pay attention.
Verboticisms
Click on each verboticism to read the sentences created by the Verbotomy writers, and to see your voting options...
You have two votes. Click on the words to read the details, then vote your favorite.
Nontributor
Created by: mweinmann
Pronunciation: non - trib - you - tore
Sentence: When Lenny didn't get the raise he thought he deserved, he became a nontributor at all of the meetings he was forced to attend. He brought in nothing that could be interpreted as a contribution to the meeting. Instead, he brought in crossword books, playing cards or even his Nintendo DS. Once in awhile, he would say something like "does anyone know a four letter word for someone who misbehaves in company meetings ending in the letter K?" Or "Yes, the Red Jack goes on the Black Queen", just to irritate those who made him attend.
Etymology: Contributor (To help bring about a result; act as a factor, giving in common with others for a common purpose) + Non (Negative form of a word or group of words)
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COMMENTS:
excellent - Jabberwocky, 2009-01-14: 11:31:00
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Innattention
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: In at ten shun
Sentence: Oliver worked for Hilton Hotel Chain as it's IT Chief. He never felt he had to be part of the boring day-to-day matters. Holding them hostage with his superior electronic intelligence, he attended the meetings he was summoned to and ignored everyone and everything. He was guilty of innattention. In fact he had a history of it...when he worked for the sanitation department, he was guilty of binattention. When he worked for the Symphony, it was violinattention; for Lufthansa, it was berlinattention. And when he worked for Tanqueray, he was guilty of ginattention; for the bank, pinattention and for the Las Vegas Tourist Board, it was sinattention. Do you think this is maybe why he'd been fired so often?
Etymology: Inn (hotel) & Inattention (lack of attention)
Procrasturbate
Created by: youmustvotenato
Pronunciation: pro-crass-stir-bate
Sentence: Rick whipped out his phone and commenced forth to procrasturbate during the meeting, much to the chagrin of corporate. Rick, of course, worked in IT.
Etymology: procrastinate and mast**bate.
Attentiondeficitdisbursement
Created by: Stevenson0
Pronunciation: at/ten/sion/de/fi/cit/dis/burse/ment
Sentence: Whenever Joe showed up at a meeting and found out that he wasn't being paid enough per hour for his computer expertise his ADD (attentiondeficitdisbursement) condition would suddenly act up until he felt he was being properly compensated.
Etymology: Whenever Joe showed up at a meeting and found out that he wasn't being paid enough per hour for his computer expertise his ADD (attentiondeficitdisbursement) condition would suddenly act up until he felt he was being properly compensated.
Quoredom
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: kwor dom
Sentence: When Rocky showed up at a meeting, he displayed a great degree of quoredom. Being the IT guy, he felt such human habits as conducting meetings were not worthy of his precious time. Since teamwork was a big portion of his bonus money, he would have been wiser and wealthier to at least pretend to participate in the proceedings.
Etymology: Quorum (a gathering of the minimal number of members of an organization to conduct business) & Boredom (the feeling of being bored by something tedious)
Muteinear
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: myoot in eer
Sentence: Phil was always a lazy, subversive radical in our management meetings. A Rebel without a Clause; a true American Idle;a Gatorade Renegade;an Insurgence Agent and a Maverick Manager. He never contributed any items to the agenda, never participated in discussions, absolutely never volunteered for any committees or extra tasks. He was a facilitator's nightmare. Instead of participating with his peers, he did crossword puzzles, read novels or watched his mini-tv. It had gone on so long unchecked that his peer group and a long line of his bosses just learned to ignore him. His purpose was ornamental, not functional. Just before he retired, the secret was revealed. He was a Muteinear...before each meeting, in fact before each work day, he simply took the batteries out of his hearing aids and enjoyed stress-free work days!
Etymology: Mutineer (open rebellion and refusal to obey authorities) & Mute (a device used to soften the tone of a musical instrument;deaden a sound or noise;expressed without speech; especially because words would be inappropriate or inadequate) & In Ear (inside the the sense organ for hearing and equilibrium)
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COMMENTS:
great word! - galwaywegian, 2009-01-14: 04:46:00
Laughed all the way through from the great first line to the punch line ending! - silveryaspen, 2009-01-14: 12:07:00
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Brattendee
Created by: purpleartichokes
Pronunciation: brat-tend-dee
Sentence: At every meeting, except for those where pastries were served, Joel was either the designated particican't or brattendee, believing he was worth more to the company due to his liberal arts education and extensive sales experience at Toys 'R' Us.
Etymology: brat, attendee
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COMMENTS:
Joel sounds like one who could be destined for fame and fortune.....among Hollywood's 'intellectual elite'. - Mustang, 2008-03-24: 05:45:00
Brings new meaning to the expression toy boy. Great choice of words and great job of blending them. Brat fits plus brings out all those feelings that go with it. Using 'brat' in your verboticism was brilliant! Exceptional verboticism! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-24: 10:38:00
Good one and an added bonus of particican't. Love it. - arrrteest, 2008-03-24: 11:34:00
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Attendease
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: att ten deez
Sentence: Seth was there, if only in body not in spirit, when the corporate meetings Started. His apparent attendease is due to the fact that the Boss told him to go and be paid for the experience, even if he felt no need to participate in any meaningful way.
Etymology: Attendee (a person who participates in a meeting) & Ease (that which is not hard)
Clusterduck
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: kləstərdək
Sentence: Ron is pretty good at working alone but when it comes to meetings he's a clusterduck. If he attends at all, he is about as useful as a bent paperclip.
Etymology: cluster (a group of people or similar objects positioned or occurring close together) + duck (lower the head or the body quickly to avoid a blow or so as not to be seen) Also a derivative of another common term that starts with cluster.
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COMMENTS:
I know that guy! - otherguy, 2009-01-14: 08:02:00
I think we all know that guy... - Nosila, 2009-01-15: 00:13:00
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Deridle
Created by: Jamagra
Pronunciation: de/ryd/l
Sentence: Jennifer disliked Keith's superciliass attitude and his attempts to deridle all of the meetings she led.
Etymology: deride (to laugh at in contempt) + idle (doing no work)
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COMMENTS:
As the closest entry yet to the verb form of the definition (and a good word in its own right) yours snagged my vote. - stache, 2008-03-24: 16:50:00
Thanks, stache! - Jamagra, 2008-03-24: 17:23:00
Superciliass is as powerful a verboticism as deridle! Potent creations! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-24: 21:13:00
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Comments:
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James
arrrteest - 2008-03-24: 07:46:00
This is a poem I actually wrote in a meeting:
Meeting Hell
By David E. Selvin
As I sit here in this meeting,
My mind's attention span is fleeting,
I contemplate actually retreating,
From this place in meeting hell.
But from the clock, it's click and clocking,
My state of mind, it keeps on mocking,
My inner scream, to me, is shocking,
As I hallucinate the ending bell.
Still, I came with no allusion,
Complicit in my blind collusion,
For my schedule’s planned intrusion,
That I’ve come to accept, but dread.
I arrive and check the seating,
Politely smile and say a greeting,
Knowing sanity will take a beating,
Within the confines of my weary head.
Still, although, I'm stuck here sitting,
My stomach lining must be pitting,
A straight jacket soon just might be fitting,
And only time will surely tell.
I hope a response is not required,
They might notice sanity expired,
And ability to reason duly mired,
My interest level a labored sell.
I awake: Is it a nightmare?
I catch myself with an insipid blank stare,
Hearing talking though the stale air,
Not all sure where it’s coming from.
Try to focus. What is the topic?
The planner’s plans were quite myopic,
My mind is on an island tropic,
My body sits here limp and numb.
I hope I don’t get called to answer,
My pulse would rise as if a dancer,
My body pained as if full with cancer,
Reacting like a hammered thumb.
A sympathetic nod of head,
Seems to follow just what is said,
But an EEG would read out "dead,"
An indication not all is well.
I'm not sure what I gain from training,
For what topic that it's pertaining,
The whole experience is very draining,
My angst is what I need to quell.
My angst is what I need to quell.
Excellent poem arrrteest! It insubordinuttily captures the disenwaged spirit of a slacktendant agendabender. ~ James
Jamagra - 2008-03-24: 09:19:00
Quoth the employee, "Nevermore!"
silveryaspen - 2008-03-24: 11:07:00
Remistram and James, your definition and cartoon are a big hit! They not only inspired great verboticisms (not a bad one in the bunch again) but even poetry! Laughter, too! Great job!
silveryaspen - 2008-03-24: 11:10:00
Did you write your poem in a meeting hell, arrrteest? It is a wonderfully well done rhyme and adds much to our time here today! I'm so glad you shared it with us.
arrrteest - 2008-03-24: 13:36:00
Write it in meeting hell? Yes, I did! It was a mind numbing, pointless, poorly thought out, going through the motions, no followthrough afterwards, dead in the water, series of meetings/"trainings" that is enherent within large organizations. It was complete with "activators," "capture sheets" and "group participation." Aaaah phoey. You bet. Am I sarred for life? Well let's just say the poem saved me from $$$$ of therapy. If you want to be productive and positive in a meeting, don't sit next to me. LOL!
purpleartichokes - 2008-03-24: 16:00:00
Great poem arrrteest! I think I was at that meeting.
Jamagra - 2008-03-24: 16:41:00
Wow Arteest! Glad you have writing as an outlet from meeting hell! I really do NOT miss those days!
arrrteest - 2008-03-24: 17:22:00
"inherent"-ah an errant moment
wayoffcenter - 2009-01-14: 04:40:00
but your word is not in your sentence...
wayoffcenter - 2009-01-14: 04:46:00
Sorry, comment in wrong spot (and I used to laugh at people who made this mistake) Comment was meant for Illoiterite.
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James