Vote for the best verboticism.

'Our boss said I had to attend this meeting.'

DEFINITION: v. To arrive at a meeting completely unprepared and then work diligently and obviously to distract yourself from the proceedings. n. A person who attends a meeting but does not believe that they are paid enough to actually pay attention.

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Verboticisms

Click on each verboticism to read the sentences created by the Verbotomy writers, and to see your voting options...

You have two votes. Click on the words to read the details, then vote your favorite.

Onslacker

Created by: leechdude

Pronunciation: on- slaker

Sentence: The onslacker didn't mind the meeting until his boss had fired him.

Etymology: onlooker, slacker

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COMMENTS:

Lot of originality in your choice of words for your etymology. Good verboticism. - silveryaspen, 2008-03-24: 21:18:00

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Attentiondeficitdisbursement

Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: at/ten/sion/de/fi/cit/dis/burse/ment

Sentence: Whenever Joe showed up at a meeting and found out that he wasn't being paid enough per hour for his computer expertise his ADD (attentiondeficitdisbursement) condition would suddenly act up until he felt he was being properly compensated.

Etymology: Whenever Joe showed up at a meeting and found out that he wasn't being paid enough per hour for his computer expertise his ADD (attentiondeficitdisbursement) condition would suddenly act up until he felt he was being properly compensated.

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Contratendant

Created by: doseydotes

Pronunciation: ˈkän-trə-ˈten-dənt

Sentence: Lars spent the entire meeting paging through the Wall Street Journal and humming absently to himself, to his son's 5th grade teacher's great consternation. "Mr. Beauregard!" she exclaimed, "I can't believe you would be such a contratendant to this parent-teacher conference!"

Etymology: From the Greek, contra, meaning an illegal association with a Middle-Eastern dictatorship; from the Kusumapura, ten, meaning "of brace-wearing age"; and from the Irish, dant, meaning, "shall not," or, literally, "dare not."

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COMMENTS:

Your etymologies are always so very enlightening. Superlatively done. Keep up the good work! - stache, 2008-03-24: 14:30:00

Close to the mark! - OZZIEBOB, 2008-03-24: 19:50:00

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Reprezzzzzentative

Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: rep rez ent eh tiv

Sentence: The bosses' reprezzzzzzentative sneered his way through the nahgenda.

Etymology: representative zzzzzzzzzzz.

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COMMENTS:

I love 'nahgenda' — it really epitomizes meetings where nothing is accomplished. - Tigger, 2008-03-24: 21:11:00

Very innovative etymology and creations! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-24: 21:28:00

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Clusterduck

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: kləstərdək

Sentence: Ron is pretty good at working alone but when it comes to meetings he's a clusterduck. If he attends at all, he is about as useful as a bent paperclip.

Etymology: cluster (a group of people or similar objects positioned or occurring close together) + duck (lower the head or the body quickly to avoid a blow or so as not to be seen) Also a derivative of another common term that starts with cluster.

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COMMENTS:

I know that guy! - otherguy, 2009-01-14: 08:02:00

I think we all know that guy... - Nosila, 2009-01-15: 00:13:00

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Nontributor

Created by: mweinmann

Pronunciation: non - trib - you - tore

Sentence: When Lenny didn't get the raise he thought he deserved, he became a nontributor at all of the meetings he was forced to attend. He brought in nothing that could be interpreted as a contribution to the meeting. Instead, he brought in crossword books, playing cards or even his Nintendo DS. Once in awhile, he would say something like "does anyone know a four letter word for someone who misbehaves in company meetings ending in the letter K?" Or "Yes, the Red Jack goes on the Black Queen", just to irritate those who made him attend.

Etymology: Contributor (To help bring about a result; act as a factor, giving in common with others for a common purpose) + Non (Negative form of a word or group of words)

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COMMENTS:

excellent - Jabberwocky, 2009-01-14: 11:31:00

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Procrasturbate

youmustvotenato

Created by: youmustvotenato

Pronunciation: pro-crass-stir-bate

Sentence: Rick whipped out his phone and commenced forth to procrasturbate during the meeting, much to the chagrin of corporate. Rick, of course, worked in IT.

Etymology: procrastinate and mast**bate.

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Trystolackadaisicalist

Created by: VigilanteLexicant

Pronunciation: TRIHST-o-LAK-a-DAYZ-a-kull-ihst.

Sentence: Jeremiah was prone to being a trystolackadaisicalist; he attended meetings but clearly didn't care one whit about what went on there.

Etymology: From tryst (an agreement to meet at a certain time and place) and lackadaisical (lazy or uncaring).

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Quoredom

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: kwor dom

Sentence: When Rocky showed up at a meeting, he displayed a great degree of quoredom. Being the IT guy, he felt such human habits as conducting meetings were not worthy of his precious time. Since teamwork was a big portion of his bonus money, he would have been wiser and wealthier to at least pretend to participate in the proceedings.

Etymology: Quorum (a gathering of the minimal number of members of an organization to conduct business) & Boredom (the feeling of being bored by something tedious)

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Spectraitor

Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: spec/tray/tur

Sentence: John attended the morning meeting merely as a spectraitor. He successfully sabotaged establishing the agenda for the day.

Etymology: spectator (onlooker) + traitor (subversive element)

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COMMENTS:

Wow! I admire the way you select words and put them together in your sentence and verboticisms so that we don't just read and understand ... they also evoke feelings and emotions ... of all kinds. Not only is your sentence and word right on the definition, but evokes that antipathy we all feel when it happens. Outstanding verboticism! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-24: 10:32:00

Cleverly constructed word. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-03-24: 19:49:00

...now if he could only get the competition to pay him for sabotaging the meetings. Hmmm. Nice word! - Tigger, 2008-03-24: 21:16:00

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2008-03-24: 00:01:00
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James

arrrteest - 2008-03-24: 07:46:00
This is a poem I actually wrote in a meeting:

Meeting Hell
By David E. Selvin

As I sit here in this meeting,
My mind's attention span is fleeting,
I contemplate actually retreating,
From this place in meeting hell.

But from the clock, it's click and clocking,
My state of mind, it keeps on mocking,
My inner scream, to me, is shocking,
As I hallucinate the ending bell.

Still, I came with no allusion,
Complicit in my blind collusion,
For my schedule’s planned intrusion,
That I’ve come to accept, but dread.

I arrive and check the seating,
Politely smile and say a greeting,
Knowing sanity will take a beating,
Within the confines of my weary head.

Still, although, I'm stuck here sitting,
My stomach lining must be pitting,
A straight jacket soon just might be fitting,
And only time will surely tell.

I hope a response is not required,
They might notice sanity expired,
And ability to reason duly mired,
My interest level a labored sell.

I awake: Is it a nightmare?
I catch myself with an insipid blank stare,
Hearing talking though the stale air,
Not all sure where it’s coming from.

Try to focus. What is the topic?
The planner’s plans were quite myopic,
My mind is on an island tropic,
My body sits here limp and numb.

I hope I don’t get called to answer,
My pulse would rise as if a dancer,
My body pained as if full with cancer,
Reacting like a hammered thumb.

A sympathetic nod of head,
Seems to follow just what is said,
But an EEG would read out "dead,"
An indication not all is well.

I'm not sure what I gain from training,
For what topic that it's pertaining,
The whole experience is very draining,
My angst is what I need to quell.
My angst is what I need to quell.

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2008-03-24: 08:40:00
Excellent poem arrrteest! It insubordinuttily captures the disenwaged spirit of a slacktendant agendabender. ~ James

Jamagra - 2008-03-24: 09:19:00
Quoth the employee, "Nevermore!"

silveryaspen - 2008-03-24: 11:07:00
Remistram and James, your definition and cartoon are a big hit! They not only inspired great verboticisms (not a bad one in the bunch again) but even poetry! Laughter, too! Great job!

silveryaspen - 2008-03-24: 11:10:00
Did you write your poem in a meeting hell, arrrteest? It is a wonderfully well done rhyme and adds much to our time here today! I'm so glad you shared it with us.

arrrteest - 2008-03-24: 13:36:00
Write it in meeting hell? Yes, I did! It was a mind numbing, pointless, poorly thought out, going through the motions, no followthrough afterwards, dead in the water, series of meetings/"trainings" that is enherent within large organizations. It was complete with "activators," "capture sheets" and "group participation." Aaaah phoey. You bet. Am I sarred for life? Well let's just say the poem saved me from $$$$ of therapy. If you want to be productive and positive in a meeting, don't sit next to me. LOL!

purpleartichokes - 2008-03-24: 16:00:00
Great poem arrrteest! I think I was at that meeting.

Jamagra - 2008-03-24: 16:41:00
Wow Arteest! Glad you have writing as an outlet from meeting hell! I really do NOT miss those days!

arrrteest - 2008-03-24: 17:22:00
"inherent"-ah an errant moment

wayoffcenter - 2009-01-14: 04:40:00
but your word is not in your sentence...

wayoffcenter - 2009-01-14: 04:46:00
Sorry, comment in wrong spot (and I used to laugh at people who made this mistake) Comment was meant for Illoiterite.

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-05-31: 00:30:00
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James