Vote for the best verboticism.
DEFINITION: v. To arrive at a meeting completely unprepared and then work diligently and obviously to distract yourself from the proceedings. n. A person who attends a meeting but does not believe that they are paid enough to actually pay attention.
Verboticisms
Click on each verboticism to read the sentences created by the Verbotomy writers, and to see your voting options...
You have two votes. Click on the words to read the details, then vote your favorite.
Slactor
Created by: readerwriter
Pronunciation: Sl-ak-tore
Sentence: The management team had to assume from his body language that notorious office slactor, Simon Sez, didn't realize he was attending his own exit interview.
Etymology: A blend of SLACKER, meaning a person who shirks work + ACTOR, a theatrical performer; feminine = slactress
Brattendee
Created by: purpleartichokes
Pronunciation: brat-tend-dee
Sentence: At every meeting, except for those where pastries were served, Joel was either the designated particican't or brattendee, believing he was worth more to the company due to his liberal arts education and extensive sales experience at Toys 'R' Us.
Etymology: brat, attendee
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COMMENTS:
Joel sounds like one who could be destined for fame and fortune.....among Hollywood's 'intellectual elite'. - Mustang, 2008-03-24: 05:45:00
Brings new meaning to the expression toy boy. Great choice of words and great job of blending them. Brat fits plus brings out all those feelings that go with it. Using 'brat' in your verboticism was brilliant! Exceptional verboticism! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-24: 10:38:00
Good one and an added bonus of particican't. Love it. - arrrteest, 2008-03-24: 11:34:00
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Trystolackadaisicalist
Created by: VigilanteLexicant
Pronunciation: TRIHST-o-LAK-a-DAYZ-a-kull-ihst.
Sentence: Jeremiah was prone to being a trystolackadaisicalist; he attended meetings but clearly didn't care one whit about what went on there.
Etymology: From tryst (an agreement to meet at a certain time and place) and lackadaisical (lazy or uncaring).
Contratendant
Created by: doseydotes
Pronunciation: ˈkän-trə-ˈten-dənt
Sentence: Lars spent the entire meeting paging through the Wall Street Journal and humming absently to himself, to his son's 5th grade teacher's great consternation. "Mr. Beauregard!" she exclaimed, "I can't believe you would be such a contratendant to this parent-teacher conference!"
Etymology: From the Greek, contra, meaning an illegal association with a Middle-Eastern dictatorship; from the Kusumapura, ten, meaning "of brace-wearing age"; and from the Irish, dant, meaning, "shall not," or, literally, "dare not."
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COMMENTS:
Your etymologies are always so very enlightening. Superlatively done. Keep up the good work! - stache, 2008-03-24: 14:30:00
Close to the mark! - OZZIEBOB, 2008-03-24: 19:50:00
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Clusterduck
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: kləstərdək
Sentence: Ron is pretty good at working alone but when it comes to meetings he's a clusterduck. If he attends at all, he is about as useful as a bent paperclip.
Etymology: cluster (a group of people or similar objects positioned or occurring close together) + duck (lower the head or the body quickly to avoid a blow or so as not to be seen) Also a derivative of another common term that starts with cluster.
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COMMENTS:
I know that guy! - otherguy, 2009-01-14: 08:02:00
I think we all know that guy... - Nosila, 2009-01-15: 00:13:00
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Barticipate
Created by: GlobalGallery
Pronunciation: Bar-tissa-payt
Sentence: Roger arrived half-dressed and unshaven to the early sales meeting. He wasn't happy to be there so he sat back with the sports page and chose to barticipate for the entire meeting.
Etymology: 1.bar - to exclude. 2.participate - to take part in or share with others.
Attentiondeficitdisbursement
Created by: Stevenson0
Pronunciation: at/ten/sion/de/fi/cit/dis/burse/ment
Sentence: Whenever Joe showed up at a meeting and found out that he wasn't being paid enough per hour for his computer expertise his ADD (attentiondeficitdisbursement) condition would suddenly act up until he felt he was being properly compensated.
Etymology: ADD + attention deficit disorder + disbursement (payment)
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COMMENTS:
It took some original thought to ADD up those words into a very unique creation! Clever! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-24: 10:06:00
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Attendunce
Created by: CrayonWarrior
Pronunciation: X-SAMPA - QtendVns At-end-un-s
Sentence: Margaret was a real attendunce. she would show up at a meeting and sit there playing on her IPhone, with no clue as to anything going on around her
Etymology: Attend - to be present Dunce - a fool
Doesntapplytameister
Created by: diyan627
Pronunciation: doesn't apply ta meister
Sentence: Rachna arrived at the meeting 10 minutes late sipping on her Starbucks coffee from a green straw, and set her cell phone on the conference table. Meanwhile the rest of us were contemplating how to merge the access databases so as to not lose the 10 months of research data and who was going to work on making the copies of the files before the merge. Her cell phone rang, and she excused herself. By the time she came back, we had assigned her a large portion of the inter-rater reliability data entry. After the meeting, she complained, "I have a Masters degree in public health; I shouldn't have to do data entry!" The Doesntapplytameister has been getting stuck with all the dirty work for so long now, and she can't quite figure out why.
Etymology: does not apply + to + me + meister
Muteinear
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: myoot in eer
Sentence: Phil was always a lazy, subversive radical in our management meetings. A Rebel without a Clause; a true American Idle;a Gatorade Renegade;an Insurgence Agent and a Maverick Manager. He never contributed any items to the agenda, never participated in discussions, absolutely never volunteered for any committees or extra tasks. He was a facilitator's nightmare. Instead of participating with his peers, he did crossword puzzles, read novels or watched his mini-tv. It had gone on so long unchecked that his peer group and a long line of his bosses just learned to ignore him. His purpose was ornamental, not functional. Just before he retired, the secret was revealed. He was a Muteinear...before each meeting, in fact before each work day, he simply took the batteries out of his hearing aids and enjoyed stress-free work days!
Etymology: Mutineer (open rebellion and refusal to obey authorities) & Mute (a device used to soften the tone of a musical instrument;deaden a sound or noise;expressed without speech; especially because words would be inappropriate or inadequate) & In Ear (inside the the sense organ for hearing and equilibrium)
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COMMENTS:
great word! - galwaywegian, 2009-01-14: 04:46:00
Laughed all the way through from the great first line to the punch line ending! - silveryaspen, 2009-01-14: 12:07:00
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Comments:
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James
arrrteest - 2008-03-24: 07:46:00
This is a poem I actually wrote in a meeting:
Meeting Hell
By David E. Selvin
As I sit here in this meeting,
My mind's attention span is fleeting,
I contemplate actually retreating,
From this place in meeting hell.
But from the clock, it's click and clocking,
My state of mind, it keeps on mocking,
My inner scream, to me, is shocking,
As I hallucinate the ending bell.
Still, I came with no allusion,
Complicit in my blind collusion,
For my schedule’s planned intrusion,
That I’ve come to accept, but dread.
I arrive and check the seating,
Politely smile and say a greeting,
Knowing sanity will take a beating,
Within the confines of my weary head.
Still, although, I'm stuck here sitting,
My stomach lining must be pitting,
A straight jacket soon just might be fitting,
And only time will surely tell.
I hope a response is not required,
They might notice sanity expired,
And ability to reason duly mired,
My interest level a labored sell.
I awake: Is it a nightmare?
I catch myself with an insipid blank stare,
Hearing talking though the stale air,
Not all sure where it’s coming from.
Try to focus. What is the topic?
The planner’s plans were quite myopic,
My mind is on an island tropic,
My body sits here limp and numb.
I hope I don’t get called to answer,
My pulse would rise as if a dancer,
My body pained as if full with cancer,
Reacting like a hammered thumb.
A sympathetic nod of head,
Seems to follow just what is said,
But an EEG would read out "dead,"
An indication not all is well.
I'm not sure what I gain from training,
For what topic that it's pertaining,
The whole experience is very draining,
My angst is what I need to quell.
My angst is what I need to quell.
Excellent poem arrrteest! It insubordinuttily captures the disenwaged spirit of a slacktendant agendabender. ~ James
Jamagra - 2008-03-24: 09:19:00
Quoth the employee, "Nevermore!"
silveryaspen - 2008-03-24: 11:07:00
Remistram and James, your definition and cartoon are a big hit! They not only inspired great verboticisms (not a bad one in the bunch again) but even poetry! Laughter, too! Great job!
silveryaspen - 2008-03-24: 11:10:00
Did you write your poem in a meeting hell, arrrteest? It is a wonderfully well done rhyme and adds much to our time here today! I'm so glad you shared it with us.
arrrteest - 2008-03-24: 13:36:00
Write it in meeting hell? Yes, I did! It was a mind numbing, pointless, poorly thought out, going through the motions, no followthrough afterwards, dead in the water, series of meetings/"trainings" that is enherent within large organizations. It was complete with "activators," "capture sheets" and "group participation." Aaaah phoey. You bet. Am I sarred for life? Well let's just say the poem saved me from $$$$ of therapy. If you want to be productive and positive in a meeting, don't sit next to me. LOL!
purpleartichokes - 2008-03-24: 16:00:00
Great poem arrrteest! I think I was at that meeting.
Jamagra - 2008-03-24: 16:41:00
Wow Arteest! Glad you have writing as an outlet from meeting hell! I really do NOT miss those days!
arrrteest - 2008-03-24: 17:22:00
"inherent"-ah an errant moment
wayoffcenter - 2009-01-14: 04:40:00
but your word is not in your sentence...
wayoffcenter - 2009-01-14: 04:46:00
Sorry, comment in wrong spot (and I used to laugh at people who made this mistake) Comment was meant for Illoiterite.
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James