The create-a-word game

Verbotomist's Delight

This is a Darwinian greenhouse. To see the top verboticisms for each definition, visit the archives on the Verbotomy Blog.

Is that toilet paper on your clothesline?

DEFINITION: v. To compulsively wash and excessively reuse "disposable items", like paper cups, plastic utensils or kleenex tissues. n. An obsessive compulsion to reuse disposable items, often combined with a disposal inhibition.

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Please excuse me while I eructate.

DEFINITION: v. To apologize for a belch, or the passing of gas, even though it is obvious that the action was done intentionally and with force. n. A person who apologizes insincerely for their burping or belching.

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Hello? Hello? Is this customer service?

DEFINITION: v. To greet a person on the phone in rude or obnoxious manner, and then do your best to ignore, or talk over, whatever they say as the conversation continues. n. A person with atrocious phone manners.

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Omigod! What happened to you?

DEFINITION: v. To injure yourself while performing a normal everyday activity, such bending down, standing up, or turning your head quickly. n. An self-inflicted injury which occurred during a period of physical inactivity.

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Please listen carefully as our menu has recently changed...

DEFINITION: v. To call a phone "help line" and spend 45 minutes pushing buttons and screaming at dumb voice-recognition system, before being automatically disconnected. n. A push-button or voice-activated phone menu system designed to irritate those who use it.

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I'll just wait here until you're free.

DEFINITION: v. To hover near, or directly on top of, a person who is busy doing something else, in order to force them to immediately surrender their full attention. n. A person who invades other people's private spaces and uses the social discomfort to demand attention.

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Thanks! But can't you see you're interrupting...

DEFINITION: n. An extremely moody boss, happy one day, mad the next, happy, mad, happy, mad... v. To happily give orders one minute, then angrily yell out the opposite instructions the next. (Note: It's not because you're moody. It's because people don't listen!)

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Are you sure that you don't have athlete's foot?

DEFINITION: v. To have a medical condition or illness and yet continually deny it, even after your doctor has diagnosed it. n. A person who steadfastly refuses to accept a medical diagnosis or to follow the prescribed treatment.

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More Verbotomy: << Back to newer | More from the past >>

To see the favorite Verboticisms of the day from the past, visit the archives on the Verbotomy Blog.