Verboticism: Utensilexicon

'Little ax, are you awake?'

DEFINITION: v. To talk to, encourage and advise inanimate objects, in hopes that they will work better. n. A person who talks to their tools, cars, kitchen appliances, furniture, or whatever...

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Carmmunication

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: kärmyoōnukāshun

Sentence: We think it all started to go wrong when Chad named his car Rusty (short for rust bucket) Next he was indulging in carmummication, coaxing it to start on cold mornings, asking it to stop making those odd noises. Soon it spilled over to most every inanimate object he came into contact with. He has been known to demand an explanation from the company laserwriter when his document doesn't print correctly. If he sets a pen down on a table and it starts to roll, he will bark "STAY!" Friends are beginning to worry.

Etymology: Communication (the imparting or exchanging of information or news) + Car (a road vehicle, typically with four wheels, powered by an internal combustion engine and able to carry a small number of)

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COMMENTS:

More common than one would think - am I correct computer? - Jabberwocky, 2009-03-25: 15:20:00

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Objectorate

Created by: BoltonAlan

Pronunciation: ob-jek-tor-ate

Sentence: Your PC won't go any faster if you objectorate to it

Etymology: Object (a tangible and visible thing). Orate (To speak in a formal, often pompous manner).

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Objecterize

Created by: abrakadeborah

Pronunciation: Ob-jek-ter-ize

Sentence: In Sally's sleepless thoughts she would often objecterize an ax across flying across the room to clunk her sleeping husband in the head with...so he would stop snoring.

Etymology: Taken from the word ~ Object -Something perceptible by one or more of the senses, especially by vision or touch; a material thing. 2. A focus of attention, feeling, thought, or action: an object of contempt.

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Woktalk

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: wok tok

Sentence: Judy talked to her appliances. She'd have a toaster toast; a spout shout; a fridge bitch; a kettle prattle and her favourite was a woktalk. She loved to stir-fry gossip and chopped vegetables with her fancy new wok, Wokker, the Texas Ranger. He understood her better than her husband and didn't argue back. One day, Judy and Wokker plotted the demise of her hubby, Ralph. By having a woktalk with her sharp knife, David Bowie and her ax, Nurse Hatchet, Judy's plan to eliminate an animate object was coming together. Ralph's shaver, Darth Razor, overheard the plotting and yelled at Ralph, "Run, don't Wok!"

Etymology: Wok (pan with a convex bottom; used for frying in Chinese cooking) & Talk (express in speech)

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Relationchip

Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: ree lay shun chip

Sentence: Sylvia believed that wood was alive, so she tried to develop a relationchip with all things wooden, from tree hugging to joining splinter groups

Etymology: relationship, chip

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Axplain

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: aks playn

Sentence: Mary had to axplain to her trusty hatchet what would happen when she could not hack her snoring hubby anymore.

Etymology: Ax (edge tool with heavy sharp blade) & Explain (define, make to understand)

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Inamation

Created by: Rapunzel2426

Pronunciation:

Sentence:

Etymology:

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Incarnatoonist

Created by: readerwriter

Pronunciation: ihn-carh-nay-toon-ihst

Sentence: Celeste's first words were spoken to the shiny black buttons on her car seat. Her all-time favorite movie was "The Brave Little Toaster." Now, all grown up, she truly believed, as all incarnatoonists do, that at night her applicances came to life. And so, at the end of every day, she left a note near the dirty dishes instructing them to take a bath and dry themselves off before she saw them again in the morning.

Etymology: From INCARNATE, meaning embody, personify + CARTOONIST, meaning one who creates caricatures

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COMMENTS:

wonderful combo - Jabberwocky, 2009-03-25: 15:21:00

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Frwrench

Created by: mweinmann

Pronunciation: fur - rench

Sentence: Suzy slowly turned the bolt and this time; used soothing words spoken in frwrench. It seemed to work as the wrench smoothly fit over the bolt and responded to her parisian accent. Job done, thought Suzy as she tipped her beret....

Etymology: french (a romantic languate), wrench (a tool used to tighten bolts).

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COMMENTS:

tres bien! - Nosila, 2010-10-07: 21:52:00

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Toolekinesis

Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: tule/eh/kin/ee/sis

Sentence: Sam thought that by means of toolekinesis he could build his deck at record speed. He took it as a personal affront and considered it a rebellion when he accidentally screwed his foot onto a plank.

Etymology: tool + telekinesis

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COMMENTS:

Is Sam related to Tim the toolman on the tv show Home Improvement? - silveryaspen, 2009-03-25: 14:48:00

It's such a cute creation I can't help exclaiming Holy Tooledo! - silveryaspen, 2009-03-25: 14:53:00

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