Verboticism: Klutztomer
DEFINITION: v. To ask someone who is clearly in a store uniform, perhaps on a ladder creating a display or running a cash register "Do you work here?" n. A person who doesn't know how to ask for assistance in a retail store without asking a stupid question.
Voted For: Klutztomer
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Retaildundunce
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: re tayl dun duns
Sentence: Chad was what we call a retaildundunce. He'd come into the store, approach a clerk who was obviously wearing a uniform, complete with name tag and ask them if they worked here? He did this in every department he went into and yet he never bought anything or asked about our merchandise. It turned out that Chad was a "Mystery Shopper" who was hired by an agency to check on our customer service levels. How did we find out what he did? When our security department apprehended him, under his jacket he wore a uniform complete with name tag that said, "Chad, Mystery Shopper!" DUH!
Etymology: Retail (the selling of goods to consumers; usually in small quantities and not for resale) & Redundant (repetition of same sense in different words; use of more words than required to express an idea) & Dunce (these words are used to express a low opinion of someone's intelligence)
Staffinvection
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: staff in vek shun
Sentence: When George the patient asked the man in the hospital with the white scrubs; the stethoscope, mask and chart whether he worked there as he took George's vitals, he got himself a case of staffinvection.
Etymology: Staff (employee) & Invection (. An expression which inveighs or rails against a person) & Wordplay on Staph Infection (A spherical gram-positive parasitic bacterium of the genus Staphylococcus, usually occurring in grapelike clusters and causing boils, septicemia, and other infections).
Querylyevident
Created by: Jabberwocky
Pronunciation: kweer/lee/ev/i/dent
Sentence: Even though Sam stood at the crosswalk in his bright orange vest with the yellow reflective stripe which said Crossing Guard, holding a giant stop sign, pedestrians would still pose the querlyevident question "Are you the Crossing Guard"? Sometimes it made him feel like running amok in traffic.
Etymology: query + evident + 'clearly evident'
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COMMENTS:
LOL! made him feel like running amok in traffic. GOOD ONE! - abrakadeborah, 2009-03-27: 22:49:00
Funny! - kateinkorea, 2009-03-28: 00:00:00
play on the oft said 'fairly evident', too. Excellent word! - silveryaspen, 2009-03-28: 15:00:00
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Customyeranidiot
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: kəstəmyoŏranidēət
Sentence: Spring has come to the Mall. There is a sense of renewal as the new product lines are displayed. Gone are the Winter doldrums of the Christmas left-over sales and inventory sales. Maybe, just maybe the next customer who comes through the door will be engaging, funny, insightful, interesting... but alas each entrant into the customer-of-the-year competition seems to find a way to transmogrify from patron to customyeranidiot with insipid questions like, "Do you work here?" "Are these (the display with the strobing 50% off sign) the sale items?" or "This item that I just dropped on the floor has a chip. Can I get a mark-down on it?" The clerk soon retreats to thoughts of after-work diversions and mentally seeks a "happy place" instead of the "uzi on the rooftop" place. Retail is swell!
Etymology: customer (a person or organization that buys goods or services from a store or business) + "You're an idiot" (self- explanatory)
Boutiquery
Created by: remistram
Pronunciation: bow-teek-qwery
Sentence: His boutiquery was likely a sad excuse for a pick-up line but she didn't mind - she liked his slacks.
Etymology: boutique + query
Moronicretailist
Created by: abrakadeborah
Pronunciation: more-ron-ik-re-tail-ist
Sentence: Teddy was in the video store perusing through the latest video games when he saw a lady in a red and white uniform with a name tag of Pamela. Teddy asks,"hey do you work here Pamela?" Pamela stared hard at the man and under her breath she called him a "moronicretailist" and points to her Action Video name tag and says,"Well let me see...I'm in Action Video in this ridiculous red and white uniform talking to cutomers and you see my name tag clearly showing I work here and you called me Pamela! "So sir, what can I help you with? "Teddy asks Pamela,"are these the latest video game releases?" Pamela just points to the big red sign right in front of the kiosk where Teddy was already looking...that clearly spells out "latest video games." She shakes her head and walks off mumbling..."that "moronicretailist" must never get out of the house!"
Etymology: Moron;disused term for a person with a mental age between 8 and 12, slang for a stupid person. Retail; Retail comes from the French word retaillier which refers to "cutting off, clip and divide" in terms of tailoring (1365). It first was recorded as a noun with the meaning of a "sale in small quantities" in 1433 (French). Its literal meaning for retail was to "cut off, shred, paring".[2] Like the French, the word retail in both Dutch and German (detailhandel and Einzelhandel respectively) also refer to sale of small quantities of items. Ist; added to retail to show one who buys retail merchandise.
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COMMENTS:
good one - Jabberwocky, 2009-03-27: 12:23:00
Thank you very much Jabberwocky :) - abrakadeborah, 2009-03-27: 22:43:00
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Inquisidolt
Created by: metrohumanx
Pronunciation: in-QUIS-i-dolt
Sentence: Just got this one in "under the wire"...(electrified cattle fence)...I don't really know if this is "appropriate", but i TRUST all you crazy Verbotomists not to judge me too harshly... PAMBO wore his best "hoodie" while out shopping, and when he spotted the slinky young lady sporting a semi-commercial looking outer garb reminiscent of his favorite Progressive Insurance Representative (Stephanie Courtney), PAMBO cast all caution to the wind and asked her if she could get him a discount. PAMBO was rejected like a transplanted baboon heart, but it didn't cramp his style, because he was a dyed-in-the-wool INQUISIDOLT!
Etymology: One who makes obviously redundant inquiries....INQUISITION: a severe questioning;Middle English inquisicioun, from Anglo-French inquisition, from Latin inquisition-, inquisitio, from inquirere .....DOLT: a stupid person; probably akin to Old English dol foolish 1553....
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COMMENTS:
Where can i get a fish license? - metrohumanx, 2009-03-28: 00:19:00
Excellent....Pambo was master of the duhblivious... - Mustang, 2009-03-28: 03:29:00
Maybe you can get a fish license at the office of the justice of the deeps. - silveryaspen, 2009-03-28: 15:17:00
Great job of using James' cartoon for the basis for your sentence. Pambo is lucky he's not facing a sentence for his inquisidolt! You put a fresh spin on an old thing and got a big grin! As the old man in the old tv show Laugh In used to say "very interrrresting!" - silveryaspen, 2009-03-28: 15:29:00
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Stupormarketing
Created by: mweinmann
Pronunciation: stoo + por + mark + keting
Sentence: As a retail clerk, Jonah could vouch for all of the stupormarketing that is occurring in his town. It is difficult for him to reign in the sarcasm when asked if he works in the store while he mops up a spill or stocks the shelves from a pile of boxes.
Etymology: Stupor (the lack of critical cognitive function) Supermarket( A large self-service retail market that sells food and household goods) marketing (shopping at a market)
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COMMENTS:
heh - galwaywegian, 2009-03-27: 10:45:00
stupendous! - silveryaspen, 2009-03-28: 15:42:00
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Duhblivious
Created by: Mustang
Pronunciation: duh-BLIV-yuss
Sentence: Vernon was so bad about overlooking the obvious and asking lame questions his friends had labeled his lame practice as duhblivious and even that was something that got by him.
Etymology: Blend of 'duh' (used to express annoyance at banality, obviousness, or stupidity) and 'oblivious' (unmindful; unconscious; unaware)
Klutztomer
Created by: galwaywegian
Pronunciation: klutz tum urrrr
Sentence: trying to keep this particular klutztomer satisfied was like trying to herd cats
Etymology: customer klutz
