Verboticism: Objecterize

'Little ax, are you awake?'

DEFINITION: v. To talk to, encourage and advise inanimate objects, in hopes that they will work better. n. A person who talks to their tools, cars, kitchen appliances, furniture, or whatever...

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Objecterize

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Woktalk

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: wok tok

Sentence: Judy talked to her appliances. She'd have a toaster toast; a spout shout; a fridge bitch; a kettle prattle and her favourite was a woktalk. She loved to stir-fry gossip and chopped vegetables with her fancy new wok, Wokker, the Texas Ranger. He understood her better than her husband and didn't argue back. One day, Judy and Wokker plotted the demise of her hubby, Ralph. By having a woktalk with her sharp knife, David Bowie and her ax, Nurse Hatchet, Judy's plan to eliminate an animate object was coming together. Ralph's shaver, Darth Razor, overheard the plotting and yelled at Ralph, "Run, don't Wok!"

Etymology: Wok (pan with a convex bottom; used for frying in Chinese cooking) & Talk (express in speech)

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Persuadethething

Created by: abrakadeborah

Pronunciation: Pər-ˈswād-the-thing

Sentence: Jeff snored so loud that his wife Michelle never even got a wink of sleep,often she would lay awake thinking of solutions to end his awful snoring. One night out of sheer frustraion she grabbed Jeff's ax out of his tool box and started to "persuadethething" to jump out of her hand and clunk Jeff in the head! ~:-0

Etymology: Persuade;To to plead with or urge. The;before consonants usually thə, before vowels usually thē, sometime before vowels also thə; for emphasis before titles and names or to suggest uniqueness often ˈthē. Thing;An object.

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Machintercourse

petaj

Created by: petaj

Pronunciation: ma-sheen-ta-cors

Sentence: Sharleen's children were stressed and jealous because their mother's machintercourse took precedence over any attention she gave to them. But, my goodness she never had a day's trouble from any of her appliances.

Etymology: machinery + intercourse (conversation - keep it clean!)

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COMMENTS:

now that's just too wierd! :) - galwaywegian, 2009-03-25: 06:05:00

it is a little disturbing - makes me wonder how you spend your spare time petaj - Jabberwocky, 2009-03-25: 15:22:00

Sounds borderline kinky. I LIKE it!! - Mustang, 2009-03-25: 23:41:00

Did Mach have intercourse? lol!:)funny! - abrakadeborah, 2009-03-27: 05:30:00

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Gadgetyack

Created by: remistram

Pronunciation: gah-jet-yak

Sentence: Her gadgetyack was performed not only to encourage the lawn mower, but to scare all the neighbours into thinking she was crazy, and more importantly not to mess with her.

Etymology: gadget + yack (as in yackety-yak)

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Axecent

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: aks sent

Sentence: When Wanda spoke to her ax, Blade, she spoke with an axecent, in the hopes that her husband, Biff, would not understand. His open-mouth snoring and drooling had gotten on her nerves. Log-cutter or not, it was time to ax him from her life. His bad habits annoyed her and she found him incredibly boring. When Wanda felt this way, she knew she had to act and get a replacement quickly. She needed to make room for husband #4, Axel, someone far more suited to her. He was handsome, rich and wanted her badly. She spoke tenderly in her axecent to Blade and encouraged him to use his power on the hapless Biff. She persuaded him to do the deed and bury him in the back yard with the first 3 husbands who annoyed her. They were dead only because she could not hack them anymore!

Etymology: Ax (an edge tool with a heavy bladed head mounted across a handle; to terminate) & Accent (a diacritical mark used to indicate stress or placed above a vowel to indicate a special pronunciation;distinctive manner of oral expression)

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COMMENTS:

What a hilarious story....great word. - mweinmann, 2009-03-25: 08:46:00

If ever discovered, she could claim it was an axident! - silveryaspen, 2009-03-25: 09:57:00

axcellent - galwaywegian, 2009-03-25: 11:26:00

I think ax might need an accomplice to bury #3 - perhaps she would have to enlist the shove(woo)l - Jabberwocky, 2009-03-25: 15:19:00

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Automobabble

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: aw-tuh-moh-bab-uhl

Sentence: In lieu of scheduled service on his car Tim talks to his Civic. His automobabble can be better described as begging or cajoling. "I know it's cold, please start today. Com'on baby don't quit on me. Get me home and I'll give you a little oil tomorrow".

Etymology: automobile (a passenger vehicle designed for operation on ordinary roads and typically having four wheels and a gasoline or diesel internal-combustion engine) + babble (to talk idly, irrationally, excessively, or foolishly; chatter or prattle)

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Anthrobromorphminion

Created by: Ismelstar

Pronunciation: [an-thruh-broh-mawrf-min-yuhn]

Sentence: Speaking gently, Catalonia anthrobromorphminized the office printer, whispering, "Don't you know what a hurry I'm in? All I want for you to do is print. Print for me O sweet Cannon M882. Print!" "You'll never understand Her like I do," muttered Ralph as he passed them on the way to the water cooler.

Etymology: A mash up of anthropomorphism, bro and minion. To attribution Best Friends Forever characteristics to inanimate objects in order to make them your minion and do your bidding.

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COMMENTS:

WOW, WEE! and I thought I made them long! - abrakadeborah, 2012-03-07: 14:41:00

Say that five times, fast! ;) - abrakadeborah, 2012-03-07: 14:42:00

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Toolekinesis

Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: tule/eh/kin/ee/sis

Sentence: Sam thought that by means of toolekinesis he could build his deck at record speed. He took it as a personal affront and considered it a rebellion when he accidentally screwed his foot onto a plank.

Etymology: tool + telekinesis

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COMMENTS:

Is Sam related to Tim the toolman on the tv show Home Improvement? - silveryaspen, 2009-03-25: 14:48:00

It's such a cute creation I can't help exclaiming Holy Tooledo! - silveryaspen, 2009-03-25: 14:53:00

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Carmmunication

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: kärmyoōnukāshun

Sentence: We think it all started to go wrong when Chad named his car Rusty (short for rust bucket) Next he was indulging in carmummication, coaxing it to start on cold mornings, asking it to stop making those odd noises. Soon it spilled over to most every inanimate object he came into contact with. He has been known to demand an explanation from the company laserwriter when his document doesn't print correctly. If he sets a pen down on a table and it starts to roll, he will bark "STAY!" Friends are beginning to worry.

Etymology: Communication (the imparting or exchanging of information or news) + Car (a road vehicle, typically with four wheels, powered by an internal combustion engine and able to carry a small number of)

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COMMENTS:

More common than one would think - am I correct computer? - Jabberwocky, 2009-03-25: 15:20:00

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Objectihifive

Created by: mweinmann

Pronunciation: ob + jekt + eh + hi + fiv

Sentence: Cecile often gave her posessions an objectihifive when they performed well and also, she just talked to them because they became dear to her.

Etymology: Object, Hi, High Five >> To greet or say hello to an object and encourage it with a High Five.

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COMMENTS:

Nice play on the word objectify - silveryaspen, 2009-03-25: 10:03:00

works for me! - galwaywegian, 2009-03-25: 11:26:00

nice - Jabberwocky, 2009-03-25: 15:23:00

Cute word - Nosila, 2009-03-25: 15:41:00

Great! - kateinkorea, 2009-03-26: 09:34:00

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