Verboticism: Failesperson

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Failesperson

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Slackercasher

Created by: splendiction

Pronunciation: slack er cash er

Sentence: Bill first thought the store had planted a mannequin, arms crossed, at the cash desk. She possessed a vacant stare and exhibited limited life. He stood perplexed, waited for the slackercasher to get into motion. Patience turned to desperation as he heard another cusstomer behind him snarl for help. “OK LET’S GET SOME SERVICE HERE, we don’t have all day!” The slackercasher did get into action: she picked up her cell and began typing a text! Bill resigned to step over to wait in a long line of another aisle.

Etymology: From slacker and casher or cashier.

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Checklout

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: cheklout

Sentence: Harry is an only child. He grew up thinking that he is the center of the universe. That’s just the way he treats his job as a checklout clerk. If a customer is so rude as to expect service he is quick to correct them. He’s been known to freeze a customer mid-sentence with just a look.

Etymology: checkout (a point at which goods are paid for in a supermarket or other store) + lout (an uncouth or aggressive man or boy)

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Patroneglect

Created by: rebelvin

Pronunciation: patron+neglect

Sentence: Patroneglect at the mall was almost bad enough to make me yearn for the steady but excruciatingly slow attention customers get at the Post Office.

Etymology: patron+neglect

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Tillshy

Created by: OZZIEBOB

Pronunciation: TILL-shy

Sentence: Why don't you shop on-line, and stop rudely interrupting my day, was the routine retort to customers from the tillshy, check-out "chick".

Etymology: Combination of TILL: drawer for money in cash-register etc., & SHY: as in workshy - to be afraid of.

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Cashearbasher

petaj

Created by: petaj

Pronunciation: cashier-basher

Sentence: Despite the number of cashearbashers working at CashCow, they seemed to make inordinate amounts of money. Yet, every week on the current affairs show, there were complainants describing their pitiful stories of how they had been ignored by sales staff too busy chatting to offer real service and how they had resorted to violence to get some attention.

Etymology: cashier + earbasher (someone who talks a lot) + basher (customer who eventually gives the chatty cashier a black eye)

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Servitosis

Created by: pieceof314

Pronunciation: serv-ih-toe-sis

Sentence: Brad suffered from an acute case of servitosis, or rather, it was the customers who were the direct victims of this insidious disease at the local MunchieMart. Brad's shallow indiference to basic customer service couldn't have been more overt. The dwindling customer base seemed to think that they were going to an inconvenience store every time they stopped by.

Etymology: service + (t)osis, state of disease

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Uncivilservant

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: un siv ill ser vant

Sentence: Megan was definitely a most uncivilservant. She never allowed anything as insignificant as a customer to interrupt her busy day. She was in a deep phone conversation (the fourth today) with her best friend, Vanessa, who was on duty working in another store, two blocks away. Their brainy exchanges usually went "Well, he says,I don't know,like, what are you doing?" "And I go,like, I dunno" "And he says 'Whatever'". "Can you imagine? Like, as if." Megan carried on in this vein for like five or ten minutes, when a customer arrived at her till. The customer was getting impatient. Megan glowered at him and turned her back to continue her very important phone call. When the man started saying, "Excuse me", Megan reluctantly turned around and chewing gum loudly, with her phone jammed into her ear, gave him an impatient "What do you want?" gesture with hands and face. Too late she twigged he wore a balaclava and held a gun in one hand (pointed at her head)and a bag to collect the money he was going to rob from her till, in the other hand. "Oh-Ma-God", she thought, "My cell phone is dying..."

Etymology: uncivil(rude, impolite,lacking good manners) & servant (one who serves or provides a service) & civil servant for rhyming (a public official, member of the civil service)

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Cellsrep

mrskellyscl

Created by: mrskellyscl

Pronunciation: cells-rep

Sentence: Adept at multitasking, Sean excelled as a cellsrep by chatting with his girlfriend, waiting on customers and doing his geometry homework all at the same time.

Etymology: cells: cellular + rep (short for representative) as in sales rep.

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Patronagent

Created by: Tigger

Pronunciation: /pey-trun-EY-jent/

Sentence: Denise was a regular customer at Le Chic Boutique, but the new patronagent at the counter treated her as if she were some person off the street, and pointedly ignored her for several minutes while chitchatting with his coworker before snatching her credit card, and then slamming a pen and receipt down in front of her. She was infuriated at his rude behavior... yet strangely turned on, too.

Etymology: Patronage - a condescending manner or attitude in dealing with people; patronizing (from Old French, patroniser "power to give favors") + Agent - a representative of a business or firm (from Latin, agentum "one who acts or conducts action")

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Crassistant

Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: krass issss tant

Sentence: The crassistant finally gave her the attention she had been trying to attract for the previous twenty minutes. In less than one minute he managed to detatch the barbecue tongs from what was left of his manhood, gift wrap it and hand it to her with such a dazzling smile that she didn't carry out plan b after all. she left the store, dropping the garlic crush on the floor as she walked out.

Etymology: assistant, crass

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COMMENTS:

didsbury Great word gww! - didsbury, 2008-05-13: 13:53:00

She didn't give him much choice as she had him in a eunique position. Just lucky she didn't threaten him with a castrato iron fry pan - Jabberwocky, 2008-05-13: 15:37:00

...or the dreaded brissket pan. Excellent word — great sentence too. Girl's got attitude! - Tigger, 2008-05-13: 17:45:00

Sometimes, you've just gotta grab their attention... - Nosila, 2008-05-13: 23:28:00

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