Verboticism: Failesperson

'Can't you see I'm busy!'

DEFINITION: n. A cashier or customer service representative who is so busy chatting with their friends or coworkers that they ignore their customers. v. To be serviced by a very annoying customer service representative.

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Salesjerk

Created by: scissorlips

Pronunciation: saylz jurk

Sentence: All too often the end of our long wait in line is met by a salesjerk; a cocky, nitwit who can exert authority only through annoying customers.

Etymology: sales + JERK, similar to salesclerk

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Dissociate

Created by: stache

Pronunciation: dĭ-sō'shē-ĭt

Sentence: After she made her way back to the electronics department, having to make her way past one dissociate after another who, apparently oblivious to her existence or that of any other customer, had no apparent function beyond taking up aisle space, the blue-smocked critters became scarce. When she finally found one and asked where she could find an adapter to use her ipod with her home stereo, the dull-eyed response was, "that's not my aisle, but if we have 'em they would definitely be in this half of the store."

Etymology: dissociate (-āt'), from the psychological defense mechanism dissociation, whereby an individual compartmentalizes certain thoughts, emotions, sensations, and/or memories; term coined by The French psychiatrist Pierre Janet, later expanded on in Jung's theories; associate (-ĭt), term used by a certain (world's largest)retailer as a euphamism for what passes as a sales staff.

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COMMENTS:

Like it! - pieceof314, 2008-05-13: 13:29:00

thanks, 314. first time I've tried to give a verbotomy to an existing word. - stache, 2008-05-13: 17:02:00

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Crassistant

Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: krass issss tant

Sentence: The crassistant finally gave her the attention she had been trying to attract for the previous twenty minutes. In less than one minute he managed to detatch the barbecue tongs from what was left of his manhood, gift wrap it and hand it to her with such a dazzling smile that she didn't carry out plan b after all. she left the store, dropping the garlic crush on the floor as she walked out.

Etymology: assistant, crass

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COMMENTS:

didsbury Great word gww! - didsbury, 2008-05-13: 13:53:00

She didn't give him much choice as she had him in a eunique position. Just lucky she didn't threaten him with a castrato iron fry pan - Jabberwocky, 2008-05-13: 15:37:00

...or the dreaded brissket pan. Excellent word — great sentence too. Girl's got attitude! - Tigger, 2008-05-13: 17:45:00

Sometimes, you've just gotta grab their attention... - Nosila, 2008-05-13: 23:28:00

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Patroneglect

Created by: rebelvin

Pronunciation: patron+neglect

Sentence: Patroneglect at the mall was almost bad enough to make me yearn for the steady but excruciatingly slow attention customers get at the Post Office.

Etymology: patron+neglect

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Servitosis

Created by: pieceof314

Pronunciation: serv-ih-toe-sis

Sentence: Brad suffered from an acute case of servitosis, or rather, it was the customers who were the direct victims of this insidious disease at the local MunchieMart. Brad's shallow indiference to basic customer service couldn't have been more overt. The dwindling customer base seemed to think that they were going to an inconvenience store every time they stopped by.

Etymology: service + (t)osis, state of disease

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Malcontedant

didsbury

Created by: didsbury

Pronunciation: mal-conn-ten-dant

Sentence: I am in a hurry but the staff in this shop are all such malcontendants there is no one who will serve me.

Etymology: Combination of malcontent and attendant. First used by Mark Twain to describe a particularly slovenly, family-run restaurant he visited in Mississippi. The restaurant gained notoriety and indeed some short lived success until it was forcibly closed by the owners who had a sense of humour failure when even physical abuse of the clientele wasn't enough to deter the hordes of malcontent-watchers.

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COMMENTS:

very nice - Jabberwocky, 2008-05-13: 15:40:00

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Inshopordination

Created by: tmcg5625

Pronunciation: in-shop-ord-in-ayshun

Sentence: Well friends, imagine my suprise when the shop keeper was playing non other than a bit of the old Ludwig Van! I strolled nonchalantly to the counter where i was my friends completely ignored! I dare say the only response to this kind of dreadful inshopordination is a bit of the old ultra violence.

Etymology: shop- sartorial purveyance. Insubordination- "Come over here and say that!"

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Cashearbasher

petaj

Created by: petaj

Pronunciation: cashier-basher

Sentence: Despite the number of cashearbashers working at CashCow, they seemed to make inordinate amounts of money. Yet, every week on the current affairs show, there were complainants describing their pitiful stories of how they had been ignored by sales staff too busy chatting to offer real service and how they had resorted to violence to get some attention.

Etymology: cashier + earbasher (someone who talks a lot) + basher (customer who eventually gives the chatty cashier a black eye)

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Customerswervice

Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: cus/tum/ur/swurv/iss

Sentence: Customerswervice was so bad that I couldn't even make eye contact with the cashier let alone pay for my purchases.

Etymology: customer service + swerve

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COMMENTS:

They also swerve who only fail to wait on us. Good one. - Mustang, 2008-05-13: 20:24:00

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Custymied

Created by: Rutilus

Pronunciation: Cus-time-eed

Sentence: Jackie couldn't believe how poor service was in the UK compared to the states. She was sick of being custymied by surly shop assistants. Bring on the flight back to LA!

Etymology: Customer - buyer, client; stymied - obstructed, blocked

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COMMENTS:

Excellent blend. - Mustang, 2008-05-13: 20:26:00

very nice - OZZIEBOB, 2008-05-15: 06:36:00

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