Verboticism: Caratnschtick

'I've been pre-approved for a new credit card?'

DEFINITION: v. To offer pre-approved credit, loans or sweepstake prizes in order to lock the some poor sucker into permanent usury. n. Junk mail, spam or telemarketing offers for pre-approved credit and loans.

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Edmcmahonuever

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: ed mc man oover

Sentence: Stella got that important-looking envelope in the mail for the first time. You know, the one that says, "You May Already Be A New Homeowner"! Her heart started beating faster as she read the large print. Was it really possible after living in basement suites and studio apartments all her adult life, that she could actually have won a home of her own??? Her head swirled with fantasy with each sentence she read. The possibilities...more than one bedroom and bathroom, a lovely garden, a garage, a patio, loads of room for entertaining and room for a dog or two! In other words, all the things she could never afford working at the convenience store. All she had to do to win the house was order a pre-approved credit card at 36% interest and order a few magazines. She looked through the selection of publications, trying to find one or two that actually might interest her. Popular Mechanics, BodyBuilder, Crochet Today, HangGlider's Weekly, Parenting...gee, not much here to make her want to read them once, never mind a 3 year subscription. She settled for Convenience Store Monthly and Buyer Beware, sent in her entry forms and payment. At first she was excited, but disappointment grew at not hearing anything back for weeks. One early morning, a van, a marching band, champagne, flowers and a TV crew showed up at her door. Stella answered it in hair rollers, shaggy slippers and a distressed housecoat, with a green cosmetic mask stuck on her face. She had won the House!!! She was awestruck, her mask cracked and peeled as she jumped up and down. The house she had won was ironically the one that Ed McMahon had been foreclosed on and now she was the proud owner. This edmcmahoneuever had worked in her favor!

Etymology: Ed McMahon (TV Personality also known as spokesperson ofr Publishers' Clearing House whose tagline "You may already be a winner" has lured millions to sign up for magazine subscriptions and merchandise in order to be entered into their Sweepatakes Draw. In latter years,ironically, Ed has faced bankruptcy, being sued by creditors, suing various people himself and mortgage foreclosures for non-payment). & Maneuver (an action aimed at evading an opponent;a move made to gain a tactical end;a deliberate coordinated movement requiring dexterity and skill)

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COMMENTS:

A Real Prize Package! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-24: 14:45:00

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Fakehoped

Created by: kitkat1995

Pronunciation: fake-hoped

Sentence: I have been fakehoped into a credit card last year, now Im stuck in debts.

Etymology:

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Telesharketing

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: teləshärkiting

Sentence: Jill screens all her calls. She has her roommate sort through her mail, because she has found that she is far too susceptible to telesharketing. Next she may have to give up watching television.

Etymology: telemarketing (the marketing of goods or services by means of telephone calls, typically unsolicited, to potential customers) + shark (a person who unscrupulously exploits or swindles others)

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COMMENTS:

:) - galwaywegian, 2010-09-07: 04:58:00

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Mailfeasance

Pseudonym

Created by: Pseudonym

Pronunciation: mail-FEEZ-ance

Sentence: The cell phone contract that I "won" seems to be a case of mailfeasance.

Etymology: mail + malfeasance

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Wotsmineisjaws

GlobalGallery

Created by: GlobalGallery

Pronunciation: whats-myne-iz-jawz

Sentence: "Eehh! No praablem, wotsmineisjaws" uttered Rodrigo as he handed the crisp new fifty dollar bills over to his desperate customer. "But you know the score man, it's a nickel on the dollar for every day you owe me...RIGHT!".

Etymology: The words of a loan shark.

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Mortalgage

Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: mort/al/age

Sentence: The sales pitch and the rates were good we decided to lock into a 60 year mortalgage.

Etymology: MORTALGAGE - from MORTAL + MORTGAGE or MORTAL + ENGAGE

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COMMENTS:

very clever - Jabberwocky, 2009-02-24: 08:59:00

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Debtbillitation

Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: det/bil/i/tay/shun

Sentence: Offering credit cards to students who have just incurred huge loans is debtbillitation and shouldn't be allowed.

Etymology: debt + bill + debilitation (enfeebling)

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COMMENTS:

I think they should make that a real word! - kateinkorea, 2009-02-24: 07:55:00

Terrific! - TJayzz, 2009-02-24: 10:43:00

Owe! Owe! Good One! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-24: 14:41:00

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Scamwow

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: skam-wow

Sentence: Having been hammered over and over by a recent infomercial about a wipe cloth, wheneven Heathcliffe would see ads of any kind for those 'too good to be true' products or services he would involuntarily shout "Scamwow!", oftentimes startling people near him.

Etymology: Blend of scam and the exclamation'wow', a play on Shamwow, a commercially advertised product.

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Aschemataripu

Created by: readerwriter

Pronunciation: uh-sceem-uh-tuh-rihp-u

Sentence: The Blandit Brothers knew Disney litigators were on the way, but they were going to get away with it as long as they could. The BBs were sending the song to cell phones with voice-over promises that budding American Idiots could have a direct link to Simon Coward. Here was the song and lyrics played in the background: Aschemataripu! What a wonderful phrase... Aschemataripu! Ain't no passing craze... It means no worries For the rest of your days It's our problem-free philosophy Aschemataripu!

Etymology: A direct rip off from "Hakuna Matata," a song from Disney's The Lion King!

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Credituate

Created by: matte76

Pronunciation:

Sentence: A new credituate in the mail always made her think of new shoes. Banks credituate their customers.

Etymology: credit + habituate, similar to barbituate

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