Verboticism: Patteronise

'We have securitized the lavatory entrance systems'

DEFINITION: v. To demonstrate your superior knowledge and intellect by using complex, confusing and mind-numbingly stupid jargon. n. A person who uses big words to inflate their unusually small ideas.

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Jargontificate

Created by: Tigger

Pronunciation: /jahr-gon-TIF-i-keyt/

Sentence: All of Ken's employees and co-workers wondered how he had gotten his job, as an Information Technology Manager, since he was practically computer-illiterate and he could barely turn a computer on without help. He was a charismatic talker though, so even though he went around using inappropriate techno-terms and unrelated buzzwords, and he would jargontificate endlessly, he only sounded convincing to other computer-illiterate people. Then he mentioned his background as a Car Salesman, and it all started to make sense.

Etymology: Jargon - language characterized pretentious vocabulary and convoluted syntax, often vague in meaning (from Old French, gargon "a chattering" [of birds]) + Pontificate - to speak in a pompous or dogmatic manner (from Latin, pontifex "bridge-maker")

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COMMENTS:

Great last line in your sentence! Well selected etymology. Good word! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-06: 10:55:00

So many good submissions today picking was tough. But this one's a peach, so I picked it. - stache, 2008-03-06: 15:13:00

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Acronimrod

Created by: Banky

Pronunciation: ack-ro-nimm-rohd

Sentence: "Joe, on the DL, the entire PTC committee needs those TPS reports PDQ. GBTW and, get `em to me ASAP, or I'll tell HR or your GM that you're in AA and are faking being sick instead of using PTO hours. Then it'll be RIP for your career. - Rob Gathers" Joe deleted the acronimrod's email just as Anna Gathers emerged from the hotel room's bathroom in a schoolgirl outfit. "You know, Joe, if I wanted a workaholic ass, I'd be banging my husband," she sneered. Joe closed the laptop and placed it gently beside the bed.

Etymology: acronym + nimrod

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COMMENTS:

Good one, Banky,your STAT response encapsulates this scenario and empowers the disenfranchised to become key stakeholders in this etymological challenge! - Nosila, 2008-03-06: 01:07:00

So... Did those TPS reports ever get submitted? I'm dying to know! Lol. Love you mini-stories. - Tigger, 2008-03-06: 10:30:00

Superlative story and word! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-06: 11:14:00

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Politspeak

Created by: amigamark

Pronunciation: pol-it-speek

Sentence: The governments insistance on using politspeak, lead to it's eventual downfall. The masses couldn't understand it, and you know what happens when 'people' don't understand something......."whack".

Etymology: polit - reference to politicians, hot air, blarney, liars and general waffle. speak - how do you know if a polititian is lying, it's mouth moves.

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COMMENTS:

Strong sentence and etymology! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-06: 11:30:00

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Idiochat

Created by: hiladizzle

Pronunciation: id-ee-uh-chat

Sentence: She likes to make herself sound smart by using idiochat.

Etymology: Idiot (an utterly foolish or senseless person) + Chat (to talk or converse)

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Dicktionary

karenanne

Created by: karenanne

Pronunciation: DIK shun air ee

Sentence: Arry Gant is such a dicktionary. He likes to use fancy words to obscure the true meaning of what he is really saying, while making it sound really important. Everything he says is technically true; it just comes off sounding a lot better than what really happened. For example, he told us yesterday that he went to an evening philosophy lecture on campus last Thursday, probably because he thought it would impress this really cute girl who hangs out with us a lot. I was getting tired of his B.S., so I called his bluff in front of her and asked him to tell us some things about it. He responded, "Well, it was so esoteric and arcane as to be virtually impenetrable. I only wish it had could have been less rarefied and more prosaic." The girl, whose intelligence he had vastly underestimated, responded, "So what you're saying is that the lecture was meant mainly for people who already have knowledge of the study of philosophy, and so you didn't understand anything the speakers were saying because you probably haven't taken any classes in it. You wish it had been way more simplified so you could have actually understood some of it. Is that right?" All he could say in response was, "Uhhhh...yeah, that's basically it," before slinking away, claiming that he had to "go do something very urgent and important."

Etymology: dick + dictionary

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COMMENTS:

Good word and story...Arry'd make a great dicktator! - Nosila, 2010-05-17: 17:11:00

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Jargonest

Created by: OllyBiss

Pronunciation:

Sentence:

Etymology:

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Bossify

Created by: Eanrael

Pronunciation: Boss i fie

Sentence: HR knew that the new commission plan would cut the worker's income by at least 1/3 if not 1/2; they would have to *bossify* the presentation. Note: With the connotation that a "boss" would be happy with either result a) people ignore the plan because the wording is too complicated or b)they believe the plan to be benificial.

Etymology: Boss - n. - slang - Good, Excellent, Cool Boss - n. - a person who is in charge of an employee or organization — ORIGIN Dutch baas ‘master’.

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Overmcthinker

Created by: mzzmee265

Pronunciation: over-mc-thinker

Sentence: She is an overmcthinker, she just has to sound smart by using big words without big thoughts

Etymology: over-beyond, to much; mcthinker-to try to think something that one cannot think really;

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Gabyrinth

Created by: OZZIEBOB

Pronunciation: GAB-uh-rinth

Sentence: Bob thought that his gabyrinth, a form of English, but with a strange admixture of words gleaned from Old English and Yiddish, made him sound super intelligence.

Etymology: Blend of GAB: loquaciousness, prattle, chatter & LABYRINTH: Any confusing, bewildering, complex state of affairs

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COMMENTS:

love it - Jabberwocky, 2008-03-06: 10:33:00

Outstanding! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-06: 11:12:00

I like it too - bookowl, 2008-03-06: 13:08:00

Very creative. I never would have thought to go down the labyrinth path - I would'a got lost. - purpleartichokes, 2008-03-06: 21:19:00

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Pompbastic

Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: pomp/bas/tic

Sentence: Petty, pushy, pathetic Paul, the executive assistant of the boss, takes an annoyingly pompbastic approach to simple office memos, agrandizing them with complicated, enigmatic, esoteric and over bearing verboseness that pisses every body off.

Etymology: pompus + bombastic (high-sounding; high-flown; inflated; pretentious)

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COMMENTS:

Sentence and words have great alliteration! Fun to say! Meaning full! Excellent! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-06: 11:11:00

Nice! Describes the definition without looking at it. - purpleartichokes, 2008-03-06: 18:09:00

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