Verboticism: Earpencil

'Why do you always carry that file folder?'

DEFINITION: n. A prop (e.g. papers, files or any non-functional equipment) used to create the illusion of busyness. v. To use office supplies to create the illusion that you are working.

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Earpencil

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Slothouflage

Created by: bigdog

Pronunciation: slawth-o-flazhe

Sentence: The piles of paper on my desk are all just slothouflage to stop the boss from seeing my pillow and scotch bottle.

Etymology: sloth (indolence) + camouflage (disguise)

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Fauxsimile

Created by: ryanpetie

Pronunciation: foh-sim-ill-lay

Sentence: Darren gathered his fauxsimiles and strode around the office like a man possessed. 'A few more laps,' he thought, 'and I could be managing partner.'

Etymology: faux/facsimile

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Maloprop

Created by: readerwriter

Pronunciation: mal-o-prop

Sentence: Eric is so retro, Petra thought. Everytime she saw him cross the office floor on his way from the men's room to his desk, she had to laugh. Oh yeah, he just had to carry those maloprops to show everyone he knew what it was like in the 20th century. It was ludicrous. And, then if you said something, he had such excuses...like he didn't understand there were better ways of doing things.

Etymology: From mal, Latin/Romance languages, for bad or sick + prop for a property used for show. Also a play on the word malapropism, the ludicrous misuse of a word. In this case, the ludicrous misuse of a prop.

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Assidupicity

Created by: jesster

Pronunciation: Ass-id-you-plicity

Sentence: While Neville's constant assiduplicity never fooled the people that actually accomplished things, management was completely taken in. He was promoted so frequently that his failures never caught up to him, and soon was in charge of the entire department.

Etymology: assiduous (involved in often constant activity )+ duplicity (the inclination or practice of misleading others through lies or trickery)

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Slackcessory

Created by: purpleartichokes

Pronunciation: slak-sess-or-ee

Sentence: Phil's slackcessory wasn't fooling anyone. The "tech manual" he was toting around was the instruction booklet for his lawn mower. Apparently, he was Fridazed when he took that course on shirkonomics.

Etymology: slack (to avoid work), accessory

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COMMENTS:

I thought a slackcessory was a new belt. - galwaywegian, 2007-06-13: 07:01:00

great one purple! - toadstool57, 2007-06-13: 07:07:00

Bravo! - Clayton, 2007-06-13: 07:42:00

very good!! - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-13: 09:27:00

Galway - a belt would be a britch-hiker. And I'm quite pleased that I finally made a word that I actually like! - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-13: 10:33:00

actually purple I think a britch-hiker is a brilliant word for suspenders - how about a belt being a gutwrencher - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-13: 10:57:00

That's good! Wish one came with the squishsuit I bought this year. - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-13: 11:21:00

"Slackcessory" is indeed a good word, though it sounds like it would apply equally to a device for enhancing the slacking experience (such as a Gameboy) as it would to a device for hiding the slacking experience. - ErWenn, 2007-06-13: 14:13:00

And "britch-hiker" is simply awesome. I think it's a generic term for anything that pulls your pants up, such as a belt, a pair of suspenders, or a wedgie-giver. - ErWenn, 2007-06-13: 14:14:00

the best - pguse, 2007-06-13: 14:55:00

Yep. Wished I thought of that. - texmom, 2007-06-13: 20:41:00

ErWenn makes a good point, but I think that words such as these might offer more utility than their highly specified synonyms. This one might have eight different sense of meaning. Perhaps more in America. - Clayton, 2007-06-13: 20:41:00

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Bogustrive

Created by: kendriveset

Pronunciation: bo-ga-strive

Sentence: Jim took more effort to bogustrive around the office than it would\'ve taken to actually do some work.

Etymology: bogus + strive

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COMMENTS:

good one - Nosila, 2010-01-07: 18:50:00

thanks so much - kendriveset, 2010-01-08: 15:48:00

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Figmendation

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: fig men day shun

Sentence: As a long time civil servant in the federal Department of the Obscure and Forgotten Files, Roger was the King of the Toadies. He spent his entire workday carrying around a file folder which was labelled S.M.A.R.T. It looked very official and proved to the innocent bystander or visitor that Roger was a man with a special mission and purpose in his work. In fact the S.M.A.R.T. File was a figmendation. It usually contained a crossword puzzle or scratch & win cards, which Roger would spend his days at work playing. His co-workers thought that the S.M.A.R.T. stood for Segregated Modules Actualizing Relative Theory. In fact, the S.M.A.R.T. acronym actually stood for See Me Avoiding Real Toil. Yes, Roger was also known by his more popular nickname: The SmartFile Dodger!

Etymology: figment (a contrived or fantastic idea, i.e: a figment of the imagination) & mendacious (intentionally untrue;lying)

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx Did Riger work at the Texas Blog Suppository? Ya crack me up, Nose! - metrohumanx, 2008-08-06: 16:37:00

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Dosserier

Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: dosss err eee ay

Sentence: he carried his dosserier with him everywhere, adding different coloured stickies each month or so to keep it looking fresh. He called it his licence to kill....time.

Etymology: dossier, dosser

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COMMENTS:

Hopefully the use of his dosserier won't come back to kick him in the dosserriere. - Clayton, 2007-06-13: 07:48:00

Maybe he carried it in a fanny pack - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-13: 09:26:00

How cheeky! - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-13: 10:36:00

i hate to butt in, but is there no rear end to these pun threads?! - jadenguy, 2007-06-13: 11:41:00

ooh that reminds me - it's lunchtime and now I'm in the moods for buns - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-13: 12:10:00

oops I meant mood - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-13: 12:11:00

I'm thinking it would be out-of-line to make a comment about sticky buns, but the air conditioner isn't working in my office today. - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-13: 12:36:00

Such a tool would be perfect for hiding the fact that you're just bumming around instead of working your @$$ off. - ErWenn, 2007-06-13: 14:05:00

Some might say you should just turn the other cheek, jadenguy, but I'm behind you 100% if you want to get to the bottom of this problem. - ErWenn, 2007-06-13: 14:10:00

Rear end to the pun threads? Tush, tush. I've got a haunch we'll be back end the saddle tomorrow. Now, let me hit the can and we can all go grab a Heinie. Fanny that I should put it that way... I've been glute to my seat the hole day. Sorry, that last one was for posteriority. - Clayton, 2007-06-13: 14:34:00

OMG Clayton and ErWenn! Too fanny! - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-13: 14:45:00

I think we should put an ASSterisk beside this definition - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-13: 14:47:00

i'm sorry if I came off a little anal before, as i didn't mean to be so stern. but i just find puns comical garbage that we'll always keep with us, but like junk in the trunk of your car that you forget about for as long as possible, bodonkadonk on wood. - jadenguy, 2007-06-13: 16:59:00

LMAO!! - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-13: 17:46:00

petaj No butts about it, my friend laughed so hard it rectum! - petaj, 2007-06-14: 04:29:00

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Importmanteau

Created by: rephil

Pronunciation: im-PORT-man-toh

Sentence: Gerry's importmanteau always impressed visitors, but the maintenance man's keys signified he held more true power in the building.

Etymology: import -- rank, necessity, gravity; portmanteau -- a suitcase

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COMMENTS:

this is a great word!! - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-13: 14:48:00

Thanks -- I know I've had a few in my time! - rephil, 2007-06-13: 14:50:00

Erm -- importmanteaux, not great words! - rephil, 2007-06-13: 14:51:00

actually your words are terrific - there have just been so many good words to choose from lately - I especially like euphonia - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-13: 15:17:00

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Phantofiles

Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: fan/toe/files

Sentence: Joe had six different coloured sets of phantofiles he alternated at various times of the day to keep 'The Man' off his case and to demonstrate his industriousness and multitasking abilities. "Damn, he's good!" thought his boss. "He's been working on six different projects today and it's only noon." Joe's phantofiles put him in line for a raise.

Etymology: PHANTOFILES - noun - from PHANTOM (an appearance, or illusion without material substance) + FILES (a container, or folder for keeping papers in order)

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COMMENTS:

I worked with a guy that did that...he got away with it until his new female boss figured him out and gave him the boot! - Nosila, 2008-08-06: 00:50:00

pesty female bosses! - scrabbelicious, 2008-08-06: 06:43:00

metrohumanx What datum lurks in the hearts of men?Only the Phantofile knows. - metrohumanx, 2008-08-06: 11:25:00

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