Verboticism: Squirlvestor

'Is my money safe with you?'

DEFINITION: n. A bank which pays huge salaries to its executives who bet their customers' money on dumb investments, risky loans, and the inevitable government bail-out. v. To lend, spend, and mismanage a bank into bankruptcy.

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Mortgouge

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: mor gowj

Sentence: Remember the good old days, when a bank was synonymous with fidelity, trust, credit? Now they only pay you interest when they want to lien on you. They mortgouge your soul and make you do a balancing act everyday. They venture your hard-earned money and sell it into bondage. They make an asset out of you and me and you can take that to the bank.

Etymology: Mortgage (a conditional conveyance of property as security for the repayment of a loan; put up as security or collateral) & Gouge (obtain by coercion or intimidation)

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Squirlvestor

Created by: LiaraTivona

Pronunciation: skwerl-vest-or

Sentence: "Why would you give your money to a bank that is a known squirlvestor?" "Don't squirlvestor this company away at a time when the competition is looming!"

Etymology: squirrel (v. to store stashes for the future, many of which may not be recovered) investor (n. a person who arranges finances, often on behalf of others, by placing them in other locations in the hopes of future returns)

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Bankboozle

Created by: splendiction

Pronunciation: bank boo zl

Sentence: Bankboozle (noun or verb). The bankboozle denied its shifty ways of taking finance to the extreme: purchasing companies that didn't exist, providing discredit and embezzling the rest to their shrwiss accounts.

Etymology: This word is a combination of "bank" and part of the word "bamboozle". Bank means to hold (in this case, one's money or investments) and bamboozle means to hoodwink, deceive or confuse.

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COMMENTS:

I think I've been bankboozled before. Good word. - Mustang, 2009-01-27: 19:42:00

meaning so apparent, easy to say, fun to say, good pun, has originality ... exceptional verbotomy. - silveryaspen, 2009-01-28: 01:44:00

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Perfundory

thegoatisbad

Created by: thegoatisbad

Pronunciation: per-fun-dor-e

Sentence: Kimberly wasn't concerned about the perfundory attitude of bankers because she kept all her dollars stuffed into a mattress locked inside her panic room. In her words: "my funds are not some fat cat's fundough to shape into a golden parachute!"

Etymology: Perfunctory (with little care) + Fund (reserve of money)

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Bankrapecy

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: bangkrāp(t)sē

Sentence: The punishment for bankrapecy is a million dollars less in bonuses. Bad, bad banker! Take that you naughty person!

Etymology: bankruptcy (declared in law unable to pay outstanding debts) + rape (the crime of forcing another person to have sexual intercourse without their consent)

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Bankrapers

Created by: silveryaspen

Pronunciation: bank rape ers

Sentence: As CEO (Cheat Em Officer) of the bank, the first disorder of business was to set my salary at a million of your invested dollars, per year. Of course, each bored member voted the same for themselves. Knowing loans made, would never be repaid, we voted to lend all our business buzzard friends, millions more, so they could carrion their extravagant lifestyles and hide their rotting businesses. The rest of your money, we sinvested in the worthless stock of these business buzzards' companies. For screwing you out of your money, and screwing the government out of billions more, we have become known as the biggest bankrapers in history!

Etymology: BANK, RAPE. Also a word play on bank robbers. BANK - business offering financial services: a business that KEEPS MONEY for individual people or companies, exchanges currencies, makes loans, and offers other financial services. RAPE - violent abusive destructive treatment.

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Reelersnstealers

Created by: kateinkorea

Pronunciation: REEL ers en STEEL ers

Sentence: At this bank the wheelers and dealers are more like reelersnstealers. They reel you in and then steal from you.

Etymology: WHEELERS and DEALERS: shrewd operators, especially in business REEL: to pull in STEALER: someone who takes something dishonestly

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COMMENTS:

REELY accuRATE! - silveryaspen, 2009-01-27: 01:19:00

Wheely good - TJayzz, 2009-01-27: 10:11:00

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Fannymayiyesimay

Created by: scrabbelicious

Pronunciation: ˈfani:meɪ:i:jɛs:i:meɪ

Sentence: As an only child in an adult's body, the 30 year old banking prodigy Gerry Meander loved his job in global finance. Growing up alone meant he got everything he wanted and was self sufficient (if not satisfied). Gerry was quite happy playing with (er..) himself and "Simple Simon said" whatever Gerry demanded. Mother just kept on giving. And, as he became expert in answering his own questions, job self satisfaction was always guaranteed. So much so, Gerry founded his own bank "FannyMayiYesiMay". And it was so, Simple Simon said.

Etymology: Conglomeration of 1 - Fannie Mae: A bust bank and apparent epicenter of a global finance crisis 2 - Mother may I, the response in the playground role-play game "Simple Simon", where one child plays mother and the other children play Simon.

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Theloandanger

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: the lone dane jer

Sentence: "With his faithful fiscal companion, Bunko, the daring, diabolic and resourceful masked rider of the plain, that Lion of Credit, led the fight for unlawful banking and disorderly monetary conduct in the United States. Nowhere in the pages of history can one find a greater champion of injustice. No deed went unrealized. Return with us now to those thrilling days of yesteryear (and today)...wherever a family stands to lose their home, or a small company has to declare bankruptcy or average citizens have their money used and lost, all the while being charged for each "transaction"; where cars and boats and motorbikes are repossessed; where an individual's assets are frozen (painful) or where an investor jumps from a bridge saying, "Goodbye,it's accrual world", it will be on account of Theloandanger. From out of the past come the thundering hoofbeats of the great horse Silver Bullion! Theloandanger rides again!" MisadVentures usually concluded with one of the characters lamenting the fact that they never learned the anti-hero's name ("Who was that masked man?"), only to be told, "Why, he's Theloandanger! He's the Bank's CEO, he's under indictment, out on bail in a plea-bargain arrangement, that's why we never know his real name!" as he and Bunko ride away, heading for South America, where there were plenty of non-extradition treaties. Departing on his white horse Silver Bullion, the Danger would infamously say "Hi-yo, your Silver is away!" as the horse galloped toward the setting sun. Each venture was not over until the dividEND!

Etymology: Wordplay on The Lone Ranger(old Western radio and television series) & Loan (money leant by a bank for a fee) & Danger (peril;a venture undertaken without regard to possible loss or injury or harm)

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COMMENTS:

High! Yo! Yo rate the highest! Luv it! - silveryaspen, 2009-01-27: 01:39:00

metrohumanx Today's definition seems to have struck some raw nerves. Great composition, Kimosabe! - metrohumanx, 2009-01-27: 15:24:00

Who was that masked man?? - Mustang, 2009-01-27: 19:41:00

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Simonpurelegree

Created by: readerwriter

Pronunciation: sigh-mun-pyoor-leh-gree

Sentence: Once the citizenry realized they had become slaves to an economic system that ultimately only benefitted corporate leaders of banks, they threw off their shackles and exposed the hypocrisy of simonpurelegree. Once convicted and exposed the greedy ones were sent to Guantanomo which was renamed the Simonpurelegrist Mill.

Etymology: From SIMONPURE, an adjective meaning hypocritically virtuous and SIMON LEGREE, the cruel and horrible slavemaster of Uncle Tom's Cabin.

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COMMENTS:

I like the creativity in this! - kateinkorea, 2009-01-27: 20:53:00

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