Verboticism: Masturgration

'Oh-oh, I'm surrounded '

DEFINITION: n. A pile of used and discarded tissues; may constitute a bio-hazard. v. To drop a used tissue on to the floor beside your bed or chair, because you are so sick you can barely move.

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Phlegmbuoyancy

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: flem boy ansee

Sentence: Even when deathly ill, Marcus exuded a certain phlegmbuoyancy. Although he felt he was on death's doorknob, he wore his silk pyjamas and monogrammed silk robe, along with his designer slippers. He used not paper hankies or toilet paper to remove his mucus, but a supply of monogrammed silk handkerchiefs, which his butler gathered up to send to the CDC in Atlanta. Marcus reclined on his chaiselongue, under a mink throw and suffered through this ague. With a full table of aspirin, cough syrups and decongestants, everything that modern medicine could afford was laid out at his bedside. His butler brought him hot toddies in gold or silver goblets and had steamy moisture piped into his sick room. He winced when his doctor had told him he had the Common Cold...how could that happen to one of such superior breeding? Beside his bed lay one of the classic books he currently read, called Great Expectorations, printed in its original Phlegmish language!

Etymology: Phlegm (nasal mucus) & Buoyancy (cheerfulness that bubbles to the surface;irrepressible liveliness and good spirit;the property of something weightless and insubstantial) Flamboyancy (richly and brilliantly colorful;elaborately or excessively ornamented)

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COMMENTS:

Eleveating the common cold to the royal pain it truly is! The grandiose elevated to the grandinose! - silveryaspen, 2009-01-02: 07:43:00

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Tocsickwaste

Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: tok sik way ssst

Sentence: He drifted back into conciousness with the worrying news that the tocsickwaste beside the couch appeared to be moving. thoughts of a new mutant virus were quelled when he noticed the face of his pet chihuahua looking up throught the gunge filled kleenex.

Etymology: toxic waste, sick.

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COMMENTS:

poor chihuahua probably had a very glossy coat after that experience - Jabberwocky, 2008-03-10: 13:28:00

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Tissooze

Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: tish/oze

Sentence: Winter! Oh damn winter!! Take me now with your freezing minus 27 celcius, sore throat, aching ears, massive sinus ache, chills!!! Warmth, where is the warmth?!!!! I give up!!!!! Heating pad, neck warmer, not even four blankets help!!!!!! Running nose, rolls of toilet paper resulting in a massive mountain of tissooze surrounding me, burying me, suffocating me, killing me!!!!!!! Take me now wretched winter!!!!!!!! I succumb to you bastard winter!!!!!!!!!

Etymology: tissue + ooze

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COMMENTS:

You've obviously had the flu recently - great word - Jabberwocky, 2008-03-10: 13:29:00

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Tissidue

Created by: OZZIEBOB

Pronunciation: TISH-i-dyoo

Sentence: You imprison me in the dark recesses of your bags and pockets until I'm ready to be used for your most basic needs. You wipe your filthy hands on me; you spit on me. You drown me in your fetid waste. You despise me, calling me a threat to your environment. You throw me away. But remember it was you who you made me what I am - tissidue - for there was a time when I was a tree.

Etymology: Blend of TISSUE & RESIDUE

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COMMENTS:

Tree mend us. - purpleartichokes, 2008-03-10: 10:46:00

how sad - Jabberwocky, 2008-03-10: 16:58:00

Your sentence reminds me of "The Giving Tree" — albeit a more bitter version... - Tigger, 2008-03-10: 23:24:00

Poignant, yet elementree...where's my tissue? - Nosila, 2008-03-11: 22:36:00

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Rhinoviraltrash

Created by: lynlyn

Pronunciation:

Sentence:

Etymology:

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Phleghoard

Created by: pilar1347

Pronunciation: FLEG-ord

Sentence: n: John is so sick the phelghoard on his night-stand is taller than the lamp! v: I know Mary has a cold, but she's been phelghoarding all over our shared workspace.

Etymology: A combination of phelgm and hoard.

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Inphlegmatory

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: in flem a tor ee

Sentence: The Fire Marshall was certain to declare that the bedroom floor of Sal Iver's house was definitely an inphlegmatory risk. Sal had been sick with the flu for 2 days and had neither the skill nor the will to put all his used tissues in a receptacle. His bedroom was the site of much hankie pankie and the normally phlegmboyant Sal was reduced to that of a bronchialbuster who had not lasted long enough to win the big purse. The irony was that 2 days ago, he had planned to phone in sick to play hookey from work. He figured the word Gesundheit meant "serves you right". All this while his catarrh gently weeps...sniff, sniff!

Etymology: Inflammatory (characterized or caused by inflammation;unhealthy, detrimental to health) & Phlegm (Mucous,expectorated matter;saliva mixed with discharges from the respiratory passages)

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COMMENTS:

Ack !! I wanted to use "phlegm" for this one. Let's see... there are three more body fluids, right? I mean, phlegm, blood, something and something else... Gosh this is going to be difficult. - XMbIPb, 2010-05-19: 02:48:00

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Phlegmageddon

Created by: OZZIEBOB

Pronunciation: flem-uh-GED-on

Sentence: So ill was Bob that he truly believed that he had died and been reincarnated as a nose. Despairingly he was a nose not of classic beauty such as a hepburn, but more in the mould of a durrante. And things didn't seem to be getting any better for him, for when the great Rhinobyl disaster struck, and not even a puff of air issued out of the quatrils of Nosetradamus, he started to believe the end was nigh. Fellow snoozles, konks, beaks and candlesticks gather around him, honkers heavenwards, looking for signuses, but the outlook remained grimaldi, things were, "C'est beaucoup." Indeed, he was sure, that a phlegmaggedon of tissumungous proportions was slowly enveloping him.

Etymology: PHlEGM: the thick mucus secreted in the respiratory passages and discharged through the mouth, esp. that occurring in the lungs and throat passages, as during a cold. 2. one of the four elemental bodily humors of medieval physiology, regarded as causing sluggishness or apathy. ARMAGEDDON: the last and completely destructive battle. Any great and crucial conflict.

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COMMENTS:

Great Sentence. Luv Jimmy Durante! Great way to start the new year ... with a great eponym! - silveryaspen, 2009-01-02: 07:46:00

Sounds like Bob was quite phlegmatic. - Mustang, 2009-01-04: 06:09:00

Poor Bob, to be halluciphlegmatic and fighting the ultimate War of the Noses! - mweinmann, 2009-01-05: 16:33:00

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Snoxic

earlnewton

Created by: earlnewton

Pronunciation: SNOCKS-ick

Sentence: Surrounded by three tissue boxes worth of his own fluids, Peter's room was becoming snoxic.

Etymology: derived from snot + toxic

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Infloorendsza

Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: in/flor/ends/za

Sentence: Josh had learned in his meditation class to let go of problems and let them float away so he put the teaching into practice used infloorendsza to rid himself of his germs carefully wrapped up in tissues.

Etymology: influenza + floor + ends + za (which is sort of like ya)

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COMMENTS:

petaj Sick! And it suggests that some kind of growth (flora) has taken over. - petaj, 2008-03-10: 09:55:00

Snot so bad! Song for the day, Booger Woogie Bugle Boy! - purpleartichokes, 2008-03-10: 18:25:00

Good word. The eyes have it, parhaps more the noses! - OZZIEBOB, 2008-03-10: 21:10:00

LOve the way you embedded floor and ends in influenza ... clever blending ... fits the definition. Outstanding word! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-10: 23:00:00

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