DEFINITION: n. The strong feelings of devotion and affection which a person feels towards their favorite mechanical device or appliance, such as a car, boat, power tool, or toilet. v. To lavish a machine with affection, attention and an imagined personality.

Inanimorous

Created by: Banky

Pronunciation: in-ANN-ah-morr-us

Sentence: The vibration of the unbalanced washer shook the ceiling pot rack, the pans on it sounding a cacophony of distant gongs. Roger sighed, and picked up the evening paper, turning on the dim orange sodium light of the old table lamp next to him. Shortly after the shaking stopped, he heard feet hit the floor. Marjorie emerged from the stairs looking flushed, carrying an empty hamper. "You know," Roger started slowly, not looking up from the paper, "we could get a new machine since that one is so far out of balance?" Her face fell. "Oh, we don't need to spend that kind of money right now. Besides, this one does a fabulous job with my delicates." She paled when she realized her innuendo, and the paper folded down to reveal a stone-faced Roger, locking her in a stare. His steeled eyes revealed his knowledge of her inanimorus affair with the Maytag 7800 front loader. The weight of 34 years of marriage dimmed the light in the already dark wood-paneled room. Scattered cords of light dodged around the edges of the curtains, revealing how dusty the room was. She tracked a small piece of lint suspended in a ray between them as it drifted on thermals and drafts, in and out of the beam of light, to avoid his gaze. Eyes refocused as Roger slowly lifted his paper back to reading level. Marjorie saw the harsh outline of his eyes soften and the glint of a tear just before they were once again replaced with headlines proclaiming the latest tournament Cinderella. She filled and put the kettle on the stove, and left the room.

Etymology: inanimate + amorous

Points: 875

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