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'We have securitized the lavatory entrance systems'

DEFINITION: v. To demonstrate your superior knowledge and intellect by using complex, confusing and mind-numbingly stupid jargon. n. A person who uses big words to inflate their unusually small ideas.

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Dicktionary

karenanne

Created by: karenanne

Pronunciation: DIK shun air ee

Sentence: Arry Gant is such a dicktionary. He likes to use fancy words to obscure the true meaning of what he is really saying, while making it sound really important. Everything he says is technically true; it just comes off sounding a lot better than what really happened. For example, he told us yesterday that he went to an evening philosophy lecture on campus last Thursday, probably because he thought it would impress this really cute girl who hangs out with us a lot. I was getting tired of his B.S., so I called his bluff in front of her and asked him to tell us some things about it. He responded, "Well, it was so esoteric and arcane as to be virtually impenetrable. I only wish it had could have been less rarefied and more prosaic." The girl, whose intelligence he had vastly underestimated, responded, "So what you're saying is that the lecture was meant mainly for people who already have knowledge of the study of philosophy, and so you didn't understand anything the speakers were saying because you probably haven't taken any classes in it. You wish it had been way more simplified so you could have actually understood some of it. Is that right?" All he could say in response was, "Uhhhh...yeah, that's basically it," before slinking away, claiming that he had to "go do something very urgent and important."

Etymology: dick + dictionary

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COMMENTS:

Good word and story...Arry'd make a great dicktator! - Nosila, 2010-05-17: 17:11:00

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Idiochat

Created by: hiladizzle

Pronunciation: id-ee-uh-chat

Sentence: She likes to make herself sound smart by using idiochat.

Etymology: Idiot (an utterly foolish or senseless person) + Chat (to talk or converse)

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Blusterblather

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: bləstərbleðər

Sentence: After years as a spokesperson for the utility company, Jill is so versed in blusterblather that she has trouble understanding her own twaddle.

Etymology: bluster (talk in a loud, aggressive, or indignant way with little effect) + blather (talk long-windedly without making very much sense)

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Patteronise

Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: pat err owe n aye z

Sentence: She constantly patteronised Patty, despite doubts being brought forward about the verissimilitude of her verbosity.

Etymology: patronise, patter.

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Patroisnize

Created by: bookowl

Pronunciation: pa/traw/nize

Sentence: Please don't patroisnize me - I don't have my PHD in linguistics.

Etymology: patronize + patios

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COMMENTS:

Whew! Strong creation! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-06: 11:29:00

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Lingostar

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: lin go star

Sentence: Paula McCartney was very possessive about the John, By George. She was a self-proclaimed bathroom monitor and rules writer, legislator and enforcer. She was the Loo-tenant, the Canservationist and the Privy Counselor. When new signs were needed, she was the lingostar and create baffling and confusing edicts that no one understood. Being Bladder Controller meant she could invent the rules and execute them. Everyone in the office felt that she belonged "Back in the USSR"..."Eight Days a Week". When they boycotted the toilets, she asked them if they needed to go...they answered, "No Reply" or "I Feel Fine". Her boss finally intervened and told her, "Let it Be", even though people told him, "You're going to lose that girl". She quit and became a "Paperback Writer" and followed "The Long and Winding Road" to lingostardom.

Etymology: Lingo ( a characteristic language of a particular group) & Star (a performer who receives prominent billing) & Wordplay on Ringo Starr (the 4th Beatle...With a little help from my friends)

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COMMENTS:

Luckily, Pete Best quit after the Hamburg tour (when they sang as a back-up band for Tony Sheridan). If Ringo didn't take Pete's spot at the drum set, this word would have never been born. Cool word, N! :-) - XMbIPb, 2010-05-17: 01:34:00

was he related to John Rennon? - galwaywegian, 2010-05-17: 10:46:00

I like the comment of Paul, when asked if Ringo was the best drummer in the world, he said Ringo wasn't even the best drummer in the Beatles! - Nosila, 2010-05-17: 17:14:00

LOL... - XMbIPb, 2010-05-17: 20:05:00

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Normcrosbeing

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: norm croz bee ing

Sentence: Norma Crosby was the quintessential Normcrosbeing in our office. She thought by using big words (that she had seen in print, but apparently failed to check the definitions of), people would think she was far more educated than the Grade 10 level she had actually achieved, barely. When she had transferred into our HR Office, she felt it obliged her to speak far above the intellect of our internal clients, even if it meant inventing her own words. The clients were often left shaken and confused when she spoke in large words that had nothing to do with the topic at hand. As a result, people avoided her like the plague and chose not to believe any facts that she presented. Her personal crusade was that unless words were at least eight or ten letters long, why bother to use them?? It would be redumbdant and wasterly and youtilize no hexpediant deliverables.

Etymology: Norm Crosby - (Comedian, considered the Master of the Malaprop, who uses the wrong words, usually big ones to make confusing, funny comments.(i.e he speaks from his diagram and drinks decapitated coffee) & Being (a creature, a living person)

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx I swear we must have worked in the same place in a prior lifetime. - metrohumanx, 2008-12-31: 00:55:00

You are probably right...in "The Office"! And now you know why it is a hit! - Nosila, 2008-12-31: 23:11:00

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Malaproporter

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: mal a prop por ter

Sentence: When Christine was in charge of giving instructions, she was a malaproporter. Her big, convaluting words and writing, often left the office staff with confusing instructions. When she ran for the office of Safety and Evacuation Officer, she was voted out, due to her unclear and head-spinning guidance!

Etymology: Malapropism (A malapropism is the production of an incorrect word in place of a word with a similar sound, resulting in a nonsensical, often humorous utterance & Purporter (the intended meaning of a communication have the often specious appearance of being, intending, or claiming)

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Gobbledygush

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: gobl - dee - gush

Sentence: Annabelle was certain her presentations were made more interesting and informative by the loquacious nature of her vocabulary but her listeners invariably regarded them as so much gobbledygush.

Etymology: Blend of gobbledygook (mumbo jumbo) and gush....to spew.

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COMMENTS:

Rolls off the tongue....lovely - amigamark, 2008-03-06: 13:56:00

Great Create! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-06: 11:47:00

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Masterverbate

Created by: remistram

Pronunciation: mas-ter-ver-beyt

Sentence: After Jim finished his daily masterverbating on everyone, going on and on about proper code of conduct they all felt icky and wanted to take a shower.

Etymology: masturbate + verb (as in verbal gratification through self-stimulation)

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COMMENTS:

Love it! "Master", as in I am so much better than you, should be in the etymology as well! - purpleartichokes, 2008-03-06: 18:08:00

Laughed long and hard! Excellent! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-06: 21:32:00

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2008-03-06: 00:01:00
Today's definition was suggested by Nosila. Thank you Nosila. ~ James

purpleartichokes - 2008-03-06: 21:11:00
Love the 'toon today James. I think my boss is considering installing one on our bathroom doors, complete with an age-appropriate timer, which leaves me wondering when I'm gonna get a chance to pluck my eyebrows.

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2008-03-07: 06:05:00
Thanks Purple, Is there a personal purpose code for plucking your eyebrows? ~ James

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-05-17: 00:00:00
Today's definition was suggested by Nosila. Thank you Nosila. ~ James