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'We have securitized the lavatory entrance systems'

DEFINITION: v. To demonstrate your superior knowledge and intellect by using complex, confusing and mind-numbingly stupid jargon. n. A person who uses big words to inflate their unusually small ideas.

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Verboticisms

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Jargontificate

Created by: Tigger

Pronunciation: /jahr-gon-TIF-i-keyt/

Sentence: All of Ken's employees and co-workers wondered how he had gotten his job, as an Information Technology Manager, since he was practically computer-illiterate and he could barely turn a computer on without help. He was a charismatic talker though, so even though he went around using inappropriate techno-terms and unrelated buzzwords, and he would jargontificate endlessly, he only sounded convincing to other computer-illiterate people. Then he mentioned his background as a Car Salesman, and it all started to make sense.

Etymology: Jargon - language characterized pretentious vocabulary and convoluted syntax, often vague in meaning (from Old French, gargon "a chattering" [of birds]) + Pontificate - to speak in a pompous or dogmatic manner (from Latin, pontifex "bridge-maker")

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COMMENTS:

Great last line in your sentence! Well selected etymology. Good word! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-06: 10:55:00

So many good submissions today picking was tough. But this one's a peach, so I picked it. - stache, 2008-03-06: 15:13:00

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Acronimrod

Created by: Banky

Pronunciation: ack-ro-nimm-rohd

Sentence: "Joe, on the DL, the entire PTC committee needs those TPS reports PDQ. GBTW and, get `em to me ASAP, or I'll tell HR or your GM that you're in AA and are faking being sick instead of using PTO hours. Then it'll be RIP for your career. - Rob Gathers" Joe deleted the acronimrod's email just as Anna Gathers emerged from the hotel room's bathroom in a schoolgirl outfit. "You know, Joe, if I wanted a workaholic ass, I'd be banging my husband," she sneered. Joe closed the laptop and placed it gently beside the bed.

Etymology: acronym + nimrod

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COMMENTS:

Good one, Banky,your STAT response encapsulates this scenario and empowers the disenfranchised to become key stakeholders in this etymological challenge! - Nosila, 2008-03-06: 01:07:00

So... Did those TPS reports ever get submitted? I'm dying to know! Lol. Love you mini-stories. - Tigger, 2008-03-06: 10:30:00

Superlative story and word! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-06: 11:14:00

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Vocabularry

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: voh-kab-yuh-ler-ee

Sentence: When Mary saw the note on the snack machine she was confused. It read: This incremental pecuniary aggrandizement is repugnant to the proletariat. She asked Jane what it meant. "It just means that VocabuLarry; I'm sorry VocabuLawrence, our resident sesquipedalian, is pissed that they jacked up the price on the Cheese Doodles."

Etymology: vocabulary (the stock of words used by or known to a particular people or group of persons) + Larry (a nickname for Lawrence)

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Bigblurtzah

Created by: silveryaspen

Pronunciation: big - blurtz - ah

Sentence: Whether it be the professor, the politician, the military drill instructor, the businessman, or anyone, those who think they can confuse and impress with big words are just bigblurtzahs!

Etymology: Big: huge Blurtz: spewing big words without giving any thought to what is uttered. Zah: my own creation for a synonym for Ugh! A play on the expression Big Bertha!

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COMMENTS:

how true - Jabberwocky, 2008-03-06: 13:11:00

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Gobblededash

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: GOB-uhl-dee-dash

Sentence: Jean had a little in the way of technical knowledge regarding electronic, photographic and surveillance systems but she had a huge vocabulary and when called on to discuss those topics could be counted on to ramble on with enthusiastic gobblededash not realizing that most folks knew she was blathering.

Etymology: Blend of 'gobbledygook' (language characterized by circumlocution and jargon, usually hard to understand)and 'balderdash' (nonsense)

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Verbiagedimwiting

Created by: abrakadeborah

Pronunciation: Vir-be-ag-dim-wit-ing

Sentence: Nancy Noesnutting was always posting notes all over the office using her verbiagedimwiting skills.

Etymology: Verbiage - speech or writing that uses too many words or excessively technical expressions. Dimwit - A stupid person

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Lingostar

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: lin go star

Sentence: Paula McCartney was very possessive about the John, By George. She was a self-proclaimed bathroom monitor and rules writer, legislator and enforcer. She was the Loo-tenant, the Canservationist and the Privy Counselor. When new signs were needed, she was the lingostar and create baffling and confusing edicts that no one understood. Being Bladder Controller meant she could invent the rules and execute them. Everyone in the office felt that she belonged "Back in the USSR"..."Eight Days a Week". When they boycotted the toilets, she asked them if they needed to go...they answered, "No Reply" or "I Feel Fine". Her boss finally intervened and told her, "Let it Be", even though people told him, "You're going to lose that girl". She quit and became a "Paperback Writer" and followed "The Long and Winding Road" to lingostardom.

Etymology: Lingo ( a characteristic language of a particular group) & Star (a performer who receives prominent billing) & Wordplay on Ringo Starr (the 4th Beatle...With a little help from my friends)

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COMMENTS:

Luckily, Pete Best quit after the Hamburg tour (when they sang as a back-up band for Tony Sheridan). If Ringo didn't take Pete's spot at the drum set, this word would have never been born. Cool word, N! :-) - XMbIPb, 2010-05-17: 01:34:00

was he related to John Rennon? - galwaywegian, 2010-05-17: 10:46:00

I like the comment of Paul, when asked if Ringo was the best drummer in the world, he said Ringo wasn't even the best drummer in the Beatles! - Nosila, 2010-05-17: 17:14:00

LOL... - XMbIPb, 2010-05-17: 20:05:00

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Dicktionary

karenanne

Created by: karenanne

Pronunciation: DIK shun air ee

Sentence: Arry Gant is such a dicktionary. He likes to use fancy words to obscure the true meaning of what he is really saying, while making it sound really important. Everything he says is technically true; it just comes off sounding a lot better than what really happened. For example, he told us yesterday that he went to an evening philosophy lecture on campus last Thursday, probably because he thought it would impress this really cute girl who hangs out with us a lot. I was getting tired of his B.S., so I called his bluff in front of her and asked him to tell us some things about it. He responded, "Well, it was so esoteric and arcane as to be virtually impenetrable. I only wish it had could have been less rarefied and more prosaic." The girl, whose intelligence he had vastly underestimated, responded, "So what you're saying is that the lecture was meant mainly for people who already have knowledge of the study of philosophy, and so you didn't understand anything the speakers were saying because you probably haven't taken any classes in it. You wish it had been way more simplified so you could have actually understood some of it. Is that right?" All he could say in response was, "Uhhhh...yeah, that's basically it," before slinking away, claiming that he had to "go do something very urgent and important."

Etymology: dick + dictionary

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COMMENTS:

Good word and story...Arry'd make a great dicktator! - Nosila, 2010-05-17: 17:11:00

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Idiochat

Created by: hiladizzle

Pronunciation: id-ee-uh-chat

Sentence: She likes to make herself sound smart by using idiochat.

Etymology: Idiot (an utterly foolish or senseless person) + Chat (to talk or converse)

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Verbostintate

Created by: Redrover

Pronunciation: ver-bos-tin-tate

Sentence: Marcia was afraid that her subordinates might realize that she had no idea what she was talking about so she overwhelmed everyone with her verbostintation. It worked, they all thought her unusually brilliant although she really hadn't a clue.

Etymology: verbosity = using an excessive number of words; ostentatious = characterized by or given to pretentious or conspicuous show in an attempt to impress others

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COMMENTS:

Nice originality! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-06: 21:35:00

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2008-03-06: 00:01:00
Today's definition was suggested by Nosila. Thank you Nosila. ~ James

purpleartichokes - 2008-03-06: 21:11:00
Love the 'toon today James. I think my boss is considering installing one on our bathroom doors, complete with an age-appropriate timer, which leaves me wondering when I'm gonna get a chance to pluck my eyebrows.

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2008-03-07: 06:05:00
Thanks Purple, Is there a personal purpose code for plucking your eyebrows? ~ James

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-05-17: 00:00:00
Today's definition was suggested by Nosila. Thank you Nosila. ~ James