Vote for the best verboticism.
DEFINITION: n., A set of product instructions, or a warning label, which is so obviously self-evident that it should be completely unnecessary. v., To provide unneeded directions, advice and/or warnings.
Verboticisms
Click on each verboticism to read the sentences created by the Verbotomy writers, and to see your voting options...
You have two votes. Click on the words to read the details, then vote your favorite.
Guidunce
Created by: TJayzz
Pronunciation: Guy-dunce
Sentence: When Tom bought a tin of gloss paint to brighten up his front door he was amazed at the guidunce given, when he read on the back of the label, 'WARNING' 'Do not eat contents'. He wondered how long it had taken the production team to come up with that little gem!
Etymology: Guidance(Advice,information) + Dunce(a person who is slow to learn, or not intelligent) = Guidunce
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COMMENTS:
Was he licking the paint off his finger at the time? - Jabberwocky, 2008-11-05: 14:57:00
Ha Ha. No but he ate the brush when he finished, that didn't come with instructions! - TJayzz, 2008-11-05: 16:21:00
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Dimwiterature
Created by: Jabberwocky
Pronunciation: dim/wi/tur/i/chur
Sentence: Sally was an English professor and had no trouble reading the classics. She was, however, totally incapable of understanding the dimwiterature on product instructions.
Etymology: dim wit + literature
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COMMENTS:
i can welate to that! - galwaywegian, 2008-11-05: 10:02:00
Excellent! - TJayzz, 2008-11-05: 12:10:00
great word - OZZIEBOB, 2008-11-05: 15:42:00
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Duhliterature
Created by: Mustang
Pronunciation: duh-lit-er-eh-shur
Sentence: Reading the instructions on her hair dryer warning her not to use it while sleeping or in the shower, and the notation on the package of chips to 'open package, eat chips' Wanda was again reminded of all the duhliturature she'd encountered on other similar products.
Etymology: Blend of 'duh' (used derisively to indicate that something just stated is all too obvious or self-evident) and 'literature' (any kind of printed material such as labels, circulars, leaflets, or handbills etc)
Heedfulthings
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: heed full things
Sentence: Sandy was in for a shock because she failed to believe the heedfulthings written on her blowdryer!
Etymology: heedful things (like needful things)
Klutztructions
Created by: Tigger
Pronunciation: /kluht-struk-shuhns/
Sentence: The klutztructions that came with Donna's toaster said not to use a knife to pry out the toast if it got stuck, so she shrugged and grabbed a fork instead.
Etymology: klutz - a stupid or foolish person(from Yiddish, klots "clumsy person") + instructions (from Latin, instructus "to put in order")
Redundinstructions
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: ree dun din struk shuns
Sentence: One of the main problems with globalization (besides losing jobs in developed countries) is that buying manufactured goods abroad leaves you at the mercy of the person translating the directions for use into the English language. One such example of these redundinstructions was a little plastic kitchen tool Henry bought called a Real Remon Sqweezer. Written on a piece of paper inside the little box containing this tool were the words: "Push tool inside the lemon's skin and turn the apple right until the orange juice comes running out of the onion. Wash off tool before seizing another fruit".
Etymology: Redundant ( more than is needed, desired, or required;repetition of same sense in different words; superfluous) & Instructions ( a manual usually accompanying a technical device and explaining how to install or operate it)
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COMMENTS:
Oh man. I didn't see this one. Either we did it simultaneously or, dang, I need to drain some more of that morning oil. - zxvasdf, 2008-11-05: 10:48:00
No problem,z, great minds think alike!! - Nosila, 2008-11-05: 21:41:00
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Duhrections
Created by: libertybelle
Pronunciation: duh-reck-shuns
Sentence: It seems evident to me that one shouldn't place their bare hand directly into a running snow blower, but apparently all of the visitors to my emergency room that come in with missing fingers due to doing just that failed to read the clearly marked duhrections on the side of the machine.
Etymology: duh + directions
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COMMENTS:
This is perfect - zxvasdf, 2008-11-05: 10:46:00
This is perfect - zxvasdf, 2008-11-05: 10:46:00
Very good!! - Mustang, 2008-11-05: 19:49:00
Duhlightful! - Nosila, 2008-11-05: 21:58:00
But duh snow wasn't coming out! Love your word! - artr, 2008-11-06: 07:46:00
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Duhrections
Created by: galwaywegian
Pronunciation: duh rek shuns
Sentence: He normally followed all the duhrections, so when his newly acquired driving licence told him to tear along the dotted line....
Etymology: directions duh
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COMMENTS:
I\'ve seen a bunch of these guys out on the road. Nice! - artr, 2010-04-05: 07:25:00
Duhlicious word - Nosila, 2010-04-06: 00:14:00
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Dimstructions
Created by: Dougalistic
Pronunciation: Dim-struct-shuns
Sentence: That's a bit of an obvious dimstruction
Etymology: Dim & Instruction
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COMMENTS:
nice combo - silveryaspen, 2008-01-08: 13:20:00
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Comments:
Today's definition was suggested by yellowbird. Thank you yellowbird. ~ James
OZZIEBOB - 2008-01-09: 03:47:00
Great word!
Today's definition was suggested by yellowbird. Thank you yellowbird. ~ James