Vote for the best verboticism.
DEFINITION: n., A set of product instructions, or a warning label, which is so obviously self-evident that it should be completely unnecessary. v., To provide unneeded directions, advice and/or warnings.
Verboticisms
Click on each verboticism to read the sentences created by the Verbotomy writers, and to see your voting options...
You have two votes. Click on the words to read the details, then vote your favorite.
Klutztructions
Created by: Tigger
Pronunciation: /kluht-struk-shuhns/
Sentence: The klutztructions that came with Donna's toaster said not to use a knife to pry out the toast if it got stuck, so she shrugged and grabbed a fork instead.
Etymology: klutz - a stupid or foolish person(from Yiddish, klots "clumsy person") + instructions (from Latin, instructus "to put in order")
Stupifluous
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: stoop if loo us
Sentence: LuLu thought it ironic that when she bought a simple item like a comb for her hair, it came with lengthy instructions. Unwrap plastic around comb, place on top if head and pull through hair to detangle and smooth it. It was too bad that these stupifluous instructions did not come with furniture that needed assembly. Either the only clue to assembly was a simple diagram without enough detail or something written in Swedish. And don't get her started about those instructions that were very badly translated into English...they would have been clearer in their original lingo!
Etymology: Stupid (without much intelligence) & Superflous (more than is needed, desired, or required;extra;unnecessary)
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COMMENTS:
and it\'s fun to say. - artr, 2010-04-05: 12:08:00
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Duhrections
Created by: galwaywegian
Pronunciation: duh rek shuns
Sentence: He normally followed all the duhrections, so when his newly acquired driving licence told him to tear along the dotted line....
Etymology: directions duh
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COMMENTS:
I\'ve seen a bunch of these guys out on the road. Nice! - artr, 2010-04-05: 07:25:00
Duhlicious word - Nosila, 2010-04-06: 00:14:00
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Clodicil
Created by: OZZIEBOB
Pronunciation: KLOD-uh-suhl
Sentence: Bob fell into an uncontrollable fit of laughter when he noticed that the clodicil on his cup of coffee read: "CONTENTS ARE HOT." And he laughed so much that he spilled the contents over his hands, and now is suing the coffee shop owner for damages.
Etymology: Blend of CLOD: a dolt, blockhead & CODICIL: a short writing containing an explanation .. for a blockhead.
Idiotlawsuitprecaut
Created by: gemmgemms
Pronunciation: id-ee-aht-la-soot-pree-caht
Sentence: No one wants to be slapped with an easily prevented lawsuit. Use an idiotlawsuitprecaut on your product.
Etymology: idiot+lawsuit+precaution
Dulliterature
Created by: Mustang
Pronunciation: dull-LIT-er-uh-chur
Sentence: When she saw the instructions on her hair dryer warning her not to use it while sleeping or in the shower, amd the notation on the package of chips to 'open package, eat chips' Stephanie was once again reminded of all the dulliturature she'd encountered on other similar (usually imported) products.
Etymology: Blend of 'dull' (mentally slow; lacking brightness of mind; somewhat stupid; obtuse) and 'literature' (any kind of printed material, as circulars, leaflets, or handbills etc)
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COMMENTS:
Dullectable - Nosila, 2008-11-05: 22:01:00
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Ninnyguide
Created by: logarithm
Pronunciation: nĭn'ē-gahyd
Sentence: Examples of ninnyguides: ON A HAIRDRYER: *Do not use while sleeping. ON A BAG OF FRITOS: *You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. ON A BAR OF DIAL SOAP: *Directions: Use like regular soap. FROZEN DINNER SERVING SUGGESTION: *Defrost. ON A HOTEL-PROVIDED SHOWER CAP IN A BOX: *Fits one head. ON TESCO'S TIRAMISU DESSERT: *Do not turn upside down. (Printed on the bottom of the box.) ON MARKS & SPENCER BREAD PUDDING: *Product will be hot after heating. ON PACKAGING FOR A ROWENTA IRON: *Do not Iron clothes on body. ON BOOTS CHILDREN'S COUGH MEDICINE: *Do not drive car or operate machinery. ON NYTOL (A SLEEP AID): *Warning: May cause drowsiness. ON A KOREAN KITCHEN KNIFE: *Warning: Keep out of children. ON A STRING OF CHINESE MADE CHRISTMAS LIGHTS: *For indoor or outdoor use only. ON A JAPANESE FOOD PROCESSOR: *Not to be used for the other use. ON SAINSBURY'S PEANUTS: *Warning: contains nuts. ON AN AMERICAN AIRLINES PACKET OF NUTS: *Instructions: open packet, eat nuts. ON A SWEDISH CHAINSAW: *Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands.
Etymology: From 'ninny' - a stupid foolish person, and 'guide' - something that offers basic information or instruction. It means foolish instructions for the fools.
Sadvice
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: sad vice
Sentence: When self-evident, oxymoron warnings on packaging actually are needed for some dumb people, it is actually sadvice. But then again, why do they put electrical outlets beside showers in bathrooms anyway?
Etymology: Sad (pathetic,bad,unfortunate) & Advice (a proposal for an appropriate course of action)
Redundinstructions
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: ree dun din struk shuns
Sentence: One of the main problems with globalization (besides losing jobs in developed countries) is that buying manufactured goods abroad leaves you at the mercy of the person translating the directions for use into the English language. One such example of these redundinstructions was a little plastic kitchen tool Henry bought called a Real Remon Sqweezer. Written on a piece of paper inside the little box containing this tool were the words: "Push tool inside the lemon's skin and turn the apple right until the orange juice comes running out of the onion. Wash off tool before seizing another fruit".
Etymology: Redundant ( more than is needed, desired, or required;repetition of same sense in different words; superfluous) & Instructions ( a manual usually accompanying a technical device and explaining how to install or operate it)
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COMMENTS:
Oh man. I didn't see this one. Either we did it simultaneously or, dang, I need to drain some more of that morning oil. - zxvasdf, 2008-11-05: 10:48:00
No problem,z, great minds think alike!! - Nosila, 2008-11-05: 21:41:00
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Redundaloquation
Created by: grohldberg12
Pronunciation: (ree-dun-duh-low-kway-zh[i]un
Sentence:
Etymology:
Comments:
Today's definition was suggested by yellowbird. Thank you yellowbird. ~ James
OZZIEBOB - 2008-01-09: 03:47:00
Great word!
Today's definition was suggested by yellowbird. Thank you yellowbird. ~ James