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'Do not use in shower? That's so dumb!'

DEFINITION: n., A set of product instructions, or a warning label, which is so obviously self-evident that it should be completely unnecessary. v., To provide unneeded directions, advice and/or warnings.

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Verboticisms

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Idiotified

Created by: tituba

Pronunciation: i di ot ti fied

Sentence: The lady was idiotified when she used her hairdryer in the shower.

Etymology: id iot i fied dumb in the brain

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Dumbstructions

Created by: denise

Pronunciation: DUM-struc-shun

Sentence: Poor girl. Due to her nervousness over her first Thanksgiving dinner, she skipped over the dumbstructions clearly written on the turkey which specifically said, "remove turkey from plastic covering and dispose of the plastic covering in the nearest garbage container. Then insert hand in body of turkey and remove inner bag which contains inner organs before putting turkey in oven..."

Etymology: A blend of dumb (stupid, not able to figure out the obvious) and instructions (a set of steps or rules one follows)

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Stuplicit

Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: stu/plic/it

Sentence: The warning label on the glass bottle was completely stuplicit; "Do not eat the bottle".

Etymology: STUPLICIT - from STUPID (foolish; senseless) + EXPLICIT (obvious, unequivocal)

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COMMENTS:

Neat & nice. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-11-05: 15:52:00

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Duhrections

libertybelle

Created by: libertybelle

Pronunciation: duh-reck-shuns

Sentence: It seems evident to me that one shouldn't place their bare hand directly into a running snow blower, but apparently all of the visitors to my emergency room that come in with missing fingers due to doing just that failed to read the clearly marked duhrections on the side of the machine.

Etymology: duh + directions

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COMMENTS:

zxvasdf This is perfect - zxvasdf, 2008-11-05: 10:46:00

zxvasdf This is perfect - zxvasdf, 2008-11-05: 10:46:00

Very good!! - Mustang, 2008-11-05: 19:49:00

Duhlightful! - Nosila, 2008-11-05: 21:58:00

artr But duh snow wasn't coming out! Love your word! - artr, 2008-11-06: 07:46:00

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Redundinstructions

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: ree dun din struk shuns

Sentence: One of the main problems with globalization (besides losing jobs in developed countries) is that buying manufactured goods abroad leaves you at the mercy of the person translating the directions for use into the English language. One such example of these redundinstructions was a little plastic kitchen tool Henry bought called a Real Remon Sqweezer. Written on a piece of paper inside the little box containing this tool were the words: "Push tool inside the lemon's skin and turn the apple right until the orange juice comes running out of the onion. Wash off tool before seizing another fruit".

Etymology: Redundant ( more than is needed, desired, or required;repetition of same sense in different words; superfluous) & Instructions ( a manual usually accompanying a technical device and explaining how to install or operate it)

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COMMENTS:

zxvasdf Oh man. I didn't see this one. Either we did it simultaneously or, dang, I need to drain some more of that morning oil. - zxvasdf, 2008-11-05: 10:48:00

No problem,z, great minds think alike!! - Nosila, 2008-11-05: 21:41:00

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Binstructions

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: binstrəkshənz

Sentence: Many products come with grinstructions, directions that are so ludicrous that you have to laugh. Others, especially those from power tools, have grimstructions with their graphic depictions of severed limbs. Ultimately all are binstructions, destined or a quick trip to the recycle container.

Etymology: bin (a receptacle in which to deposit trash or recyclables) + instructions (detailed information telling how something should be done, operated, or assembled)

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Klutztructions

Created by: Tigger

Pronunciation: /kluht-struk-shuhns/

Sentence: The klutztructions that came with Donna's toaster said not to use a knife to pry out the toast if it got stuck, so she shrugged and grabbed a fork instead.

Etymology: klutz - a stupid or foolish person(from Yiddish, klots "clumsy person") + instructions (from Latin, instructus "to put in order")

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Caveabsurdigious

mrskellyscl

Created by: mrskellyscl

Pronunciation: kah-vey-ab-sur-di-gous

Sentence: The folks in legal, being highly tagmatic, applied caveabsurdigious directions to every product to protect the company from lawsuits that may come due to accidents or death by stupidity.

Etymology: caveat: legalese term for warning, caution; an explanation or qualification + absurd:ridiculously unreasonable or illogical + litigious: tending to engage in lawsuits

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Clodicil

Created by: OZZIEBOB

Pronunciation: KLOD-uh-suhl

Sentence: Bob fell into an uncontrollable fit of laughter when he noticed that the clodicil on his cup of coffee read: "CONTENTS ARE HOT." And he laughed so much that he spilled the contents over his hands, and now is suing the coffee shop owner for damages.

Etymology: Blend of CLOD: a dolt, blockhead & CODICIL: a short writing containing an explanation .. for a blockhead.

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Guidunce

Created by: TJayzz

Pronunciation: Guy-dunce

Sentence: When Tom bought a tin of gloss paint to brighten up his front door he was amazed at the guidunce given, when he read on the back of the label, 'WARNING' 'Do not eat contents'. He wondered how long it had taken the production team to come up with that little gem!

Etymology: Guidance(Advice,information) + Dunce(a person who is slow to learn, or not intelligent) = Guidunce

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COMMENTS:

Was he licking the paint off his finger at the time? - Jabberwocky, 2008-11-05: 14:57:00

Ha Ha. No but he ate the brush when he finished, that didn't come with instructions! - TJayzz, 2008-11-05: 16:21:00

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2008-01-08: 00:01:00
Today's definition was suggested by yellowbird. Thank you yellowbird. ~ James

OZZIEBOB - 2008-01-09: 03:47:00
Great word!

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-04-05: 00:14:00
Today's definition was suggested by yellowbird. Thank you yellowbird. ~ James