Vote for the best verboticism.
DEFINITION: n., A set of product instructions, or a warning label, which is so obviously self-evident that it should be completely unnecessary. v., To provide unneeded directions, advice and/or warnings.
Verboticisms
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Retarditure
Created by: day4ghee
Pronunciation: RET-ARD-IT-URE
Sentence: BECKY SOON LEARNED THE IMPORTANCE OF RETARDITURE AFTER DROPPING HER MEGADRY 21,0000 IN THE TUB.
Etymology:
Sadvice
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: sad vice
Sentence: When self-evident, oxymoron warnings on packaging actually are needed for some dumb people, it is actually sadvice. But then again, why do they put electrical outlets beside showers in bathrooms anyway?
Etymology: Sad (pathetic,bad,unfortunate) & Advice (a proposal for an appropriate course of action)
Redundaloquation
Created by: grohldberg12
Pronunciation: (ree-dun-duh-low-kway-zh[i]un
Sentence:
Etymology:
Duhlabel
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: dəlābəl
Sentence: As Jerry got ready for work he noticed that everything he picked up had a duhlabel on it, from the shampoo he wasn't supposed to drink to the electric appliances that were not to join him in the tub; from the razor that was a hazard because it was sharp to the Q-tip that wasn't intended to go in his ear (then why are they shaped like that?) He wondered to himself just how anybody could get safely through their day without these "pearls of wisdom". Of course, Jerry might be a bit slow. It took him 38 years to notice them in the first place.
Etymology: duh (exclamation: used to comment on an action perceived as foolish or stupid) + label (a small piece of paper, fabric, plastic, or similar material attached to an object and giving information about)
Knowshow
Created by: paintergrl1313
Pronunciation: No-sho
Sentence: These hair dryer instructions are common sense, a real knowshow.
Etymology: To show someone what they should already know. Also a play on no show, cause anyone that needs a knowshow has no show common sense.
Guidunce
Created by: TJayzz
Pronunciation: Guy-dunce
Sentence: When Tom bought a tin of gloss paint to brighten up his front door he was amazed at the guidunce given, when he read on the back of the label, 'WARNING' 'Do not eat contents'. He wondered how long it had taken the production team to come up with that little gem!
Etymology: Guidance(Advice,information) + Dunce(a person who is slow to learn, or not intelligent) = Guidunce
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COMMENTS:
Was he licking the paint off his finger at the time? - Jabberwocky, 2008-11-05: 14:57:00
Ha Ha. No but he ate the brush when he finished, that didn't come with instructions! - TJayzz, 2008-11-05: 16:21:00
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Ninnyguide
Created by: logarithm
Pronunciation: nĭn'ē-gahyd
Sentence: Examples of ninnyguides: ON A HAIRDRYER: *Do not use while sleeping. ON A BAG OF FRITOS: *You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. ON A BAR OF DIAL SOAP: *Directions: Use like regular soap. FROZEN DINNER SERVING SUGGESTION: *Defrost. ON A HOTEL-PROVIDED SHOWER CAP IN A BOX: *Fits one head. ON TESCO'S TIRAMISU DESSERT: *Do not turn upside down. (Printed on the bottom of the box.) ON MARKS & SPENCER BREAD PUDDING: *Product will be hot after heating. ON PACKAGING FOR A ROWENTA IRON: *Do not Iron clothes on body. ON BOOTS CHILDREN'S COUGH MEDICINE: *Do not drive car or operate machinery. ON NYTOL (A SLEEP AID): *Warning: May cause drowsiness. ON A KOREAN KITCHEN KNIFE: *Warning: Keep out of children. ON A STRING OF CHINESE MADE CHRISTMAS LIGHTS: *For indoor or outdoor use only. ON A JAPANESE FOOD PROCESSOR: *Not to be used for the other use. ON SAINSBURY'S PEANUTS: *Warning: contains nuts. ON AN AMERICAN AIRLINES PACKET OF NUTS: *Instructions: open packet, eat nuts. ON A SWEDISH CHAINSAW: *Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands.
Etymology: From 'ninny' - a stupid foolish person, and 'guide' - something that offers basic information or instruction. It means foolish instructions for the fools.
Redunstruction
Created by: zxvasdf
Pronunciation: Re dun struc tion
Sentence: Although it seems pointless to warn about obviously self evident dangers, redunstructions are very necessary as the companies don't want their products to be associated with the death of idiots (despite the advantage of eugenics in the Darwinian sense).
Etymology: Redundant (unnecessary) & instruction (imparted knowledge)
Duhrections
Created by: galwaywegian
Pronunciation: duh rek shuns
Sentence: He normally followed all the duhrections, so when his newly acquired driving licence told him to tear along the dotted line....
Etymology: directions duh
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COMMENTS:
I\'ve seen a bunch of these guys out on the road. Nice! - artr, 2010-04-05: 07:25:00
Duhlicious word - Nosila, 2010-04-06: 00:14:00
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Comments:
Today's definition was suggested by yellowbird. Thank you yellowbird. ~ James
OZZIEBOB - 2008-01-09: 03:47:00
Great word!
Today's definition was suggested by yellowbird. Thank you yellowbird. ~ James