Verboticisms

Created by: metrohumanx

Pronunciation: IDDIO-blig-uh-tome

Sentence: ERIKA the Red was a good consumer. Whenever she purchased a new product, she diligently sent in the warranty card and saved the original packing, even though it filled her garage completely. Erika refused to even plug in an appliance until she had carefully read the IDIOBLIGATOME from cover to cover, including the upside-down part printed in Portugese. Erika devoted a five drawer file cabinet to her collection of preposterous pamphlets, superfluous booklets and imbecilic instructions. Recalcitrant by nature, she nonetheless struggled to heed every warning after translating them into Engrish. Fearful of voiding a warranty, she unplugged everything at the first sign of a thunderstorm, and refused to operate her pool filter near liquids of any kind. Ironically, Erika didn't read the fine print on the IDIOBLIGATOME which accompanied her variable-rate mortgage...now she lives in her Volvo station wagon behind the Wal-Mart.

Etymology: IDIOt+oBLIGATory+tOME=IDIOBLIGATOME....IDIOT:usually offensive : a person affected with extreme mental retardation,a foolish or stupid person;Middle English, from Anglo-French ydiote, from Latin idiota ignorant person, from Greek idiōtēs one in a private station, layman, ignorant person, from idios one's own, private; akin to Latin suus one's own.....OBLIGATORY:to constrain by physical, moral, or legal force or by the threat of litigation ;Middle English, from Anglo-French obliger, from Latin obligare, literally, to bind to, from ob- toward + ligare to bind.....TOME:a volume forming part of a larger work, a huge or infernally detailed book; Middle French or Latin; Middle French, from Latin tomus, from Greek tomos section, roll of papyrus, tome, from temnein to cut; akin to Middle Irish tamnaid he lops, Polish ciąć to cut, and perhaps to Latin tondēre to shear.

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COMMENTS:

I guess nobody ever checks out these links, but this one is highly recommended: http://www.darrenbarefoot.com/hall/main.php - metrohumanx, 2008-11-05: 06:09:00

Good word - OZZIEBOB, 2008-11-05: 15:50:00

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Created by: artr

Pronunciation: dəlābəl

Sentence: As Jerry got ready for work he noticed that everything he picked up had a duhlabel on it, from the shampoo he wasn't supposed to drink to the electric appliances that were not to join him in the tub; from the razor that was a hazard because it was sharp to the Q-tip that wasn't intended to go in his ear (then why are they shaped like that?) He wondered to himself just how anybody could get safely through their day without these "pearls of wisdom". Of course, Jerry might be a bit slow. It took him 38 years to notice them in the first place.

Etymology: duh (exclamation: used to comment on an action perceived as foolish or stupid) + label (a small piece of paper, fabric, plastic, or similar material attached to an object and giving information about)

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Created by: TJayzz

Pronunciation: Guy-dunce

Sentence: When Tom bought a tin of gloss paint to brighten up his front door he was amazed at the guidunce given, when he read on the back of the label, 'WARNING' 'Do not eat contents'. He wondered how long it had taken the production team to come up with that little gem!

Etymology: Guidance(Advice,information) + Dunce(a person who is slow to learn, or not intelligent) = Guidunce

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COMMENTS:

Was he licking the paint off his finger at the time? - Jabberwocky, 2008-11-05: 14:57:00

Ha Ha. No but he ate the brush when he finished, that didn't come with instructions! - TJayzz, 2008-11-05: 16:21:00

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Created by: Kazizzle

Pronunciation: ih/dee/oh/tahg

Sentence: Marie was rolling on the ground laughing after seeing this idiotag on a pack of matches: "Danger - Fire Kills Children".

Etymology: idiot - A common term for a person of low general intelligence and tag - A small label.

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COMMENTS:

Good word! - OZZIEBOB, 2008-01-09: 03:52:00

Gonna use this word a lot! - silveryaspen, 2008-01-11: 14:08:00

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Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: dull-LIT-er-uh-chur

Sentence: When she saw the instructions on her hair dryer warning her not to use it while sleeping or in the shower, amd the notation on the package of chips to 'open package, eat chips' Stephanie was once again reminded of all the dulliturature she'd encountered on other similar (usually imported) products.

Etymology: Blend of 'dull' (mentally slow; lacking brightness of mind; somewhat stupid; obtuse) and 'literature' (any kind of printed material, as circulars, leaflets, or handbills etc)

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COMMENTS:

Dullectable - Nosila, 2008-11-05: 22:01:00

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Created by: zxvasdf

Pronunciation: Re dun struc tion

Sentence: Although it seems pointless to warn about obviously self evident dangers, redunstructions are very necessary as the companies don't want their products to be associated with the death of idiots (despite the advantage of eugenics in the Darwinian sense).

Etymology: Redundant (unnecessary) & instruction (imparted knowledge)

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Created by: denise

Pronunciation: DUM-struc-shun

Sentence: Poor girl. Due to her nervousness over her first Thanksgiving dinner, she skipped over the dumbstructions clearly written on the turkey which specifically said, "remove turkey from plastic covering and dispose of the plastic covering in the nearest garbage container. Then insert hand in body of turkey and remove inner bag which contains inner organs before putting turkey in oven..."

Etymology: A blend of dumb (stupid, not able to figure out the obvious) and instructions (a set of steps or rules one follows)

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Created by: libertybelle

Pronunciation: duh-reck-shuns

Sentence: It seems evident to me that one shouldn't place their bare hand directly into a running snow blower, but apparently all of the visitors to my emergency room that come in with missing fingers due to doing just that failed to read the clearly marked duhrections on the side of the machine.

Etymology: duh + directions

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COMMENTS:

This is perfect - zxvasdf, 2008-11-05: 10:46:00

This is perfect - zxvasdf, 2008-11-05: 10:46:00

Very good!! - Mustang, 2008-11-05: 19:49:00

Duhlightful! - Nosila, 2008-11-05: 21:58:00

But duh snow wasn't coming out! Love your word! - artr, 2008-11-06: 07:46:00

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Created by: OZZIEBOB

Pronunciation: dil-LURT-iv

Sentence: Bob fell into an uncontrollable fit of laughter when he noticed that the dillertive on his cup of coffee read: "CONTENTS ARE HOT." However, he laughed so much that he spilled the contents over his hands, and now is suing the coffee shop owner for damages for not putting a more meaningful clodicil on the cup.

Etymology: DILL: a fool, dillbrain, dunderhead; dill a cognate of dull; LERT from Alert: a warning or alarm against impending danger & IVE: suffix meaning having a tendency to, having the quality, character or nature of. consider woprds such as captive, derivative, objective.

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COMMENTS:

love clodicil too - Jabberwocky, 2008-11-05: 14:58:00

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| Comments and Points

Created by: OZZIEBOB

Pronunciation: KLOD-uh-suhl

Sentence: Bob fell into an uncontrollable fit of laughter when he noticed that the clodicil on his cup of coffee read: "CONTENTS ARE HOT." And he laughed so much that he spilled the contents over his hands, and now is suing the coffee shop owner for damages.

Etymology: Blend of CLOD: a dolt, blockhead & CODICIL: a short writing containing an explanation .. for a blockhead.

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