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'Do not use in shower? That's so dumb!'

DEFINITION: n., A set of product instructions, or a warning label, which is so obviously self-evident that it should be completely unnecessary. v., To provide unneeded directions, advice and/or warnings.

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Guidunce

Created by: TJayzz

Pronunciation: Guy-dunce

Sentence: When Tom bought a tin of gloss paint to brighten up his front door he was amazed at the guidunce given, when he read on the back of the label, 'WARNING' 'Do not eat contents'. He wondered how long it had taken the production team to come up with that little gem!

Etymology: Guidance(Advice,information) + Dunce(a person who is slow to learn, or not intelligent) = Guidunce

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COMMENTS:

Was he licking the paint off his finger at the time? - Jabberwocky, 2008-11-05: 14:57:00

Ha Ha. No but he ate the brush when he finished, that didn't come with instructions! - TJayzz, 2008-11-05: 16:21:00

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Retarditure

Created by: day4ghee

Pronunciation: RET-ARD-IT-URE

Sentence: BECKY SOON LEARNED THE IMPORTANCE OF RETARDITURE AFTER DROPPING HER MEGADRY 21,0000 IN THE TUB.

Etymology:

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Binstructions

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: binstrəkshənz

Sentence: Many products come with grinstructions, directions that are so ludicrous that you have to laugh. Others, especially those from power tools, have grimstructions with their graphic depictions of severed limbs. Ultimately all are binstructions, destined or a quick trip to the recycle container.

Etymology: bin (a receptacle in which to deposit trash or recyclables) + instructions (detailed information telling how something should be done, operated, or assembled)

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Heedfulthings

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: heed full things

Sentence: Sandy was in for a shock because she failed to believe the heedfulthings written on her blowdryer!

Etymology: heedful things (like needful things)

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Qeduh

Created by: CDH167

Pronunciation: kyoo-ee-duh

Sentence: "Do not lick blade while chainsaw is running? QEDuh!"

Etymology: 'QED' from (quod erat demonstrandum), a phrased used at the end of a logical proof, Latin for 'ta-da!' + 'duh,' onomatopeic ignorance

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Uselessain

Created by: jack189

Pronunciation: Use-less-ain

Sentence: Joe turned over the bag of peanuts and saw a warning label "Do not eat if allergic to peanuts". "What a Uselessain!" said Joe aloud.

Etymology: Useless(to have no use)+ ain(sufix used to create new word, changed it to a noun)

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Duhrections

Created by: zebrahdh

Pronunciation: duh/rec/shuns

Sentence: I can't get this pen to write, without looking at the duhrections.

Etymology: um... duh?

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COMMENTS:

libertybelle a word so good i can't even come up with anything right now - i'm infected by your word! - libertybelle, 2008-01-08: 08:41:00

great - Jabberwocky, 2008-01-08: 12:08:00

Too good! - bananabender, 2008-01-08: 18:56:00

Oh, this one's perfect! - Tigger, 2008-01-09: 20:28:00

"That's the way duh like it!" - silveryaspen, 2008-01-11: 14:06:00

Thanks everyone! - zebrahdh, 2008-01-13: 22:03:00

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Duhliterature

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: duh-lit-er-eh-shur

Sentence: Reading the instructions on her hair dryer warning her not to use it while sleeping or in the shower, and the notation on the package of chips to 'open package, eat chips' Wanda was again reminded of all the duhliturature she'd encountered on other similar products.

Etymology: Blend of 'duh' (used derisively to indicate that something just stated is all too obvious or self-evident) and 'literature' (any kind of printed material such as labels, circulars, leaflets, or handbills etc)

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Reduhndants

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: re duh n dants

Sentence: The instructions for the new hairdryer Millie bought were a bunch of reduhndants in her mind. "Point at wet hair" & "Blow until dry" seemed self-evident to her. Too bad they forgot the old "Don't plug in near water" instruction, declared the EMT sent in response to Millie's roommate's 911 call...

Etymology: Redundance (more than is needed, desired, or required;use of more words than required/necessary to express an idea) & Duh (Used to express disdain for something deemed stupid or obvious, especially a self-evident remark)

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Dillertive

Created by: OZZIEBOB

Pronunciation: dil-LURT-iv

Sentence: Bob fell into an uncontrollable fit of laughter when he noticed that the dillertive on his cup of coffee read: "CONTENTS ARE HOT." However, he laughed so much that he spilled the contents over his hands, and now is suing the coffee shop owner for damages for not putting a more meaningful clodicil on the cup.

Etymology: DILL: a fool, dillbrain, dunderhead; dill a cognate of dull; LERT from Alert: a warning or alarm against impending danger & IVE: suffix meaning having a tendency to, having the quality, character or nature of. consider woprds such as captive, derivative, objective.

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COMMENTS:

love clodicil too - Jabberwocky, 2008-11-05: 14:58:00

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2008-01-08: 00:01:00
Today's definition was suggested by yellowbird. Thank you yellowbird. ~ James

OZZIEBOB - 2008-01-09: 03:47:00
Great word!

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-04-05: 00:14:00
Today's definition was suggested by yellowbird. Thank you yellowbird. ~ James