Verboticisms

Created by: mrskellyscl

Pronunciation: car-pet-jag-gers

Sentence: Carpetjaggers are resistant to vacuums, and may still be found in your carpet for several months after the tree has been removed, so caution is advised when running in bare feet; however, after several months, they break down and become part of the room's floora.

Etymology: wordplay on carpetbaggers: someone who moves into an area to take it over -- carpet: floor covering + jaggers: sharp or pointy projections

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: kon if fer men tay shun

Sentence: It started the moment the Christmas Tree and the In-laws had arrived at the same time, a week before Christmas. The conifirmentation process. Tree needles everywhere and verbal needles about the food, the decor, the drinks, the gift choices, etc. At least the fir needles knew when to depart the host branch, unlike the In-laws, who thought that all could benefit from their "suggestions" and constructive criticism. "Next Year", she said to her husband, "We buy the air tickets for them and make sure that they are only here for a few days, not the current one month long visit!" Houseguests, as they say, are like fish...after a few days they start to smell.

Etymology: Conifer (any gymnospermous tree or shrub bearing cones) & Fir (any of various evergreen trees of the genus Abies; often used for Christmas Trees) & Fermentation ( a process in which an agent causes an organic substance to break down into simpler substances; especially, the anaerobic breakdown of sugar into alcohol;be in an agitated or excited state;go sour or spoil)

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Created by: OZZIEBOB

Pronunciation: PEST-tuh-klawz

Sentence: When Bob hadn't left Christmas celebrations at the home of Roxie's parents by New Year's day, her family decided that it was time to look for ways to kinstirpate this perdurable pestaclaus.

Etymology: PESTACLAUS: blend of pest & Santa Claus. KINSTIRPATE: (kin & extirpate)-not my word: source??

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Created by: Tigger

Pronunciation: /piyn-dem-ik/

Sentence: Since the relatives began arriving more than three weeks before the holidays this year, the tree had to be up early. Now the living room is the source of a widespread pinedemic outbreak, which has spread to every other room in the house, further complicated the inguestation of Christmas visitors, tracking needles everywhere. And we can't even vacuum, because Uncle Frank is still down there under the tree, wrapped in his carpet of rugretfulness — and pine needles.

Etymology: pine - traditional Christmas evergreen (Latin, pīnus) + pandemic - a widespread outbreak (from Greek, pándémos "common" - typical of a disease)

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COMMENTS:

good one - Jabberwocky, 2007-12-17: 13:35:00

nice - galwaywegian, 2007-12-17: 15:15:00

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Created by: purpleartichokes

Pronunciation: car-pet-ton-nul-sin-drum

Sentence: Every December, my living room rug gets carpettunnelsyndrome from the tree needles. The rug rasps eventually get vacuumed up or compost by June.

Etymology: carpal tunnel syndrome, carpet, tunnel

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COMMENTS:

Superb! - Mustang, 2007-12-17: 06:09:00

ouch - Jabberwocky, 2007-12-17: 13:37:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: oaf fir run

Sentence: Although they love the smell of a real tree and get one every Christmas, by the end of the holidays, George & Mary are ofirun with needles. It seems to take most of the next year to finally get them gone. That is about as long as it takes to get rid of all the unwanted relatives who delight in surprising them with unexpected visits!

Etymology: Overrun (infested with;invaded by) & Fir (a coniferous evergreen, popular as a Christmas Tree.

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: cone iffer oshus

Sentence: Douglas Fir was a mild-mannered sap. His bark was certainly worse than his bite. He ran a Branch Office for his company and struggled to maintain profitability. Out of frustration, he ran for local politics and was elected. He was a coniferocious campaigner. People always used him to get votes and persuade the policymakers, but Doug would have no such influence. He just wanted to be the town Christmas Tree and light up peoples' lives. The only problem he had was that he shed a few thousand needles a day and when Christmas was finally over, he was a stick with lights on him. Needleless to say, his detractors who were larchly the undeciduous voters,would plant false stories about him in the cyPress. Despite what they said, he campaigned for the EverGreen Party. He was a tree Fir the People!

Etymology: conifer ( any gymnospermous tree or shrub bearing cones) & ferocious (marked by extreme and violent energy)

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COMMENTS:

Tree-mendous avalanche of chuckles, N! - metrohumanx, 2008-12-18: 17:39:00

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Created by: metrohumanx

Pronunciation: PURR-noy-dulls

Sentence: Barbara O'Reilly and Keith attempted to remove the PERNOYDLES which spread thru the house like invasive Zebra Mussels, crowding out the native dustballs. Each holiday season, the PERNOYDLES from down the street always stayed until the last dregs of mead were consumed, and the last tasteless limerick recited. During the evening, one guest got a severe attack of the PERNOYDLES and couldn't be located for hours. Last year, we had to drag them out of the sewers and send a few home by taxicab. PERNOYDLES - a must to avoid.

Etymology: PERsistent+anNOY+neeDLES=PERNOYDLES....PERSISTENT:existing for a long or longer than usual holiday time or continuously,retained beyond the usual jolly period,degraded only slowly by the environment;Latin persistent-, persistens, present participle of persistere.....ANNOY:to disturb or irritate especially by repeated pseudo-festive acts or remarks,Middle English anoien, from Anglo-French anuier, ennoier, from Late Latin inodiare to make loathsome, from Latin in + odium hatred .....NEEDLES: a needle-shaped leaf,a slender pointed object resembling a needle,to harass or mock cruelly, to intentionally irritate ;Middle English nedle, from Old English nǣdl; akin to Old High German nādala needle, nājan to sew, Latin nēre to spin, Greek nēn.

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COMMENTS:

Linguistically detailed and PERcise. A PERleasure to PERuse! - dochanne, 2008-12-18: 01:35:00

OH HO! Nice etymology. Pernod (liquor) and needles was what first came to mind. - silveryaspen, 2008-12-18: 02:48:00

Thank you. An absinthesis from the wee hours of the morning. :) - metrohumanx, 2008-12-18: 17:32:00

If you want to REALLY laugh, check out the toys at goblertoys.com: - metrohumanx, 2008-12-18: 17:59:00

http://goblertoys.com/ - metrohumanx, 2008-12-18: 18:00:00

Crowding out the native dustballs, how pernicious! PERfect! - Nosila, 2008-12-18: 20:38:00

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Created by: gemmgemms

Pronunciation: pest-ee-nee-da-lers

Sentence: She noticed a few pestyneedlers over by the booze and headed off to prevent a prickly situation.

Etymology: pesty:annoying or well pestersome + needle:prickles

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Created by: spickaspanner

Pronunciation: Pin-fest

Sentence: Quick we need to get rid of the christmas tree before we get a pinfest!

Etymology:

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