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'Why are you vacuuming the Christmas tree?'

DEFINITION: n., 1. A pine needle infestation, common during and after the holiday season. 2. Prickly Christmas guests who will not leave and cannot be cleaned up. v., To fall down during a holiday party and hide under a rug.

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Verboticisms

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Permaneedle

Created by: remistram

Pronunciation: pur-muh-need-l

Sentence: She couldn't decide which was worse, the permaneedles that she found stuck in her slippers in June or the obnoxious neighbours that always overstayed their welcome.

Etymology: permanent + needle (as in coniferous tree needles) and (to heckle or tease)

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Infirtration

karenanne

Created by: karenanne

Pronunciation: in fur TRAY shun

Sentence: The infirtration usually starts in mid-December, right after we put up the tree, when we really start to feel them underfoot. By Christmas Eve, they have become really insistent and prickly, and by the day after Christmas, we are ready to throw the whole mess out and just call it a season. But it seems that when cleanup time comes, we don't have many of them around needling us. New Year's Eve seems to bring some of the infirtrators back out of the woodwork, but a little eggnog (spiked) helps numb a lot of the irritation. What's that you say? No, no, not the bits from the tree; it's artificial - I'm talking about the pesky and kvetching relatives!

Etymology: infiltration + fir

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COMMENTS:

firtatious word! - Nosila, 2009-12-22: 01:12:00

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Scrourge

Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: scru/urj

Sentence: Bah humbug! Stepping on pine needles from Christmas past, present and future is the scrourge of Christmas.

Etymology: scrourge + scrooge

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Conifirmentation

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: kon if fer men tay shun

Sentence: It started the moment the Christmas Tree and the In-laws had arrived at the same time, a week before Christmas. The conifirmentation process. Tree needles everywhere and verbal needles about the food, the decor, the drinks, the gift choices, etc. At least the fir needles knew when to depart the host branch, unlike the In-laws, who thought that all could benefit from their "suggestions" and constructive criticism. "Next Year", she said to her husband, "We buy the air tickets for them and make sure that they are only here for a few days, not the current one month long visit!" Houseguests, as they say, are like fish...after a few days they start to smell.

Etymology: Conifer (any gymnospermous tree or shrub bearing cones) & Fir (any of various evergreen trees of the genus Abies; often used for Christmas Trees) & Fermentation ( a process in which an agent causes an organic substance to break down into simpler substances; especially, the anaerobic breakdown of sugar into alcohol;be in an agitated or excited state;go sour or spoil)

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Pinestilence

Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: pine/stil/ence

Sentence: The pinestilence invades our home every Christmas season and takes months to rid the house of this dreaded needle.

Etymology: pine + pestilence

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Yulegibbons

Created by: jmotsch

Pronunciation: Yewl gibbins

Sentence: Janice had been fervently combating the yulegibbons since January.

Etymology:

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Coniferocious

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: cone iffer oshus

Sentence: Douglas Fir was a mild-mannered sap. His bark was certainly worse than his bite. He ran a Branch Office for his company and struggled to maintain profitability. Out of frustration, he ran for local politics and was elected. He was a coniferocious campaigner. People always used him to get votes and persuade the policymakers, but Doug would have no such influence. He just wanted to be the town Christmas Tree and light up peoples' lives. The only problem he had was that he shed a few thousand needles a day and when Christmas was finally over, he was a stick with lights on him. Needleless to say, his detractors who were larchly the undeciduous voters,would plant false stories about him in the cyPress. Despite what they said, he campaigned for the EverGreen Party. He was a tree Fir the People!

Etymology: conifer ( any gymnospermous tree or shrub bearing cones) & ferocious (marked by extreme and violent energy)

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx Tree-mendous avalanche of chuckles, N! - metrohumanx, 2008-12-18: 17:39:00

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Efirafter

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: ef ir af ter

Sentence: Once upon a time there was a prince and princess who made the mistake of getting a real tree on their first Christmas together. One of the things that keeps them together still is finding and vacuuming tree needles,all year long, happily efirafter.

Etymology: Everafter (from now on, to eternity) & Fir (any of various evergreen trees)

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Pinestilence

Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: pine/stil/ence

Sentence: The pinestilence invades our home every Christmas season and takes months to rid the house of this dreaded needle.

Etymology: pine + pestilence (a pernicious, evil influence, or agent)

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COMMENTS:

don't pine about it! - Nosila, 2009-12-22: 01:13:00

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Nevergreenuisance

Created by: Redrover

Pronunciation: never+gree+nuisance

Sentence: This was absolutely the last Christmas that Nancy and Jason were going to spend the entire month of December cleaning up after either their nevergreenuisance tree or Jason's bratty nephews.

Etymology: nevergreen = trees that are in the midst of their death throes while still on the tree lot. Nuisance = obnoxious relatives

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-12-17: 01:45:00
Today's definition was suggested by remistram Thank you remistram ~ James

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2009-12-21: 00:14:00
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James

dimatehtunov - 2018-12-21: 21:54:00
good ivning .