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'Oh-oh, I'm surrounded '

DEFINITION: n. A pile of used and discarded tissues; may constitute a bio-hazard. v. To drop a used tissue on to the floor beside your bed or chair, because you are so sick you can barely move.

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Verboticisms

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Masturgration

Created by: idavecook

Pronunciation: MASS-TER-GRAY-SHUN

Sentence: Steve was so sick he couldn't believe the enormity of the masturgration that had occurred when he came to.

Etymology: Those dirty little tissues that seem pile up when you're feeling really sick.

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Fengtisshui

Created by: queenjane75

Pronunciation: fang-tissue-e

Sentence: Suffering through the second round of antibiotics, and the fourth week of a sinus infection, Bob, through his serious study of tissue placement, had incidentally become a master of fengtisshui.

Etymology: feng-shui+tissue=fengtisshui

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COMMENTS:

Funny and very fun! Unique choice of words to blend. Ingeniously Well Done! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-10: 23:09:00

Hillariously clever creation! - Tigger, 2008-03-10: 23:20:00

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Snotaclysm

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: snot-a-kliz-uhm

Sentence: Hector's bout with the flu and the resulting tissue pile left his bedroom looking like a total snotaclysm.

Etymology: snot (mucus) + cataclysm (disaster)

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Snortification

Created by: Tigger

Pronunciation: /SNAWRT-tuh-fi-key-shun/

Sentence: After hacking, sneezing and snorting his way through four boxes of Kleenex over the last day and a half, Harry looked around to find himself surrounded by a snortification of used tissues. 'Typhoid Harry' was going to have to look for a weakness in the structure and find a way to break through the wall of Unkleenex rather quickly — another wave of nausea was coming on and he suspected he'd need a clear path to run to the toilet again.

Etymology: Snort - to breathe noisily and forcefully through the nostrils (from Middle English, snorten; probably related to "snore") + Fortification - defensive structure built around a stronghold (from Latin, fortis "strong")

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COMMENTS:

Perhaps he used the snortification to keep well wishers and do-gooders from cnstantly bothering him! - arrrteest, 2008-03-10: 22:01:00

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Phlegmbuoyancy

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: flem boy ansee

Sentence: Even when deathly ill, Marcus exuded a certain phlegmbuoyancy. Although he felt he was on death's doorknob, he wore his silk pyjamas and monogrammed silk robe, along with his designer slippers. He used not paper hankies or toilet paper to remove his mucus, but a supply of monogrammed silk handkerchiefs, which his butler gathered up to send to the CDC in Atlanta. Marcus reclined on his chaiselongue, under a mink throw and suffered through this ague. With a full table of aspirin, cough syrups and decongestants, everything that modern medicine could afford was laid out at his bedside. His butler brought him hot toddies in gold or silver goblets and had steamy moisture piped into his sick room. He winced when his doctor had told him he had the Common Cold...how could that happen to one of such superior breeding? Beside his bed lay one of the classic books he currently read, called Great Expectorations, printed in its original Phlegmish language!

Etymology: Phlegm (nasal mucus) & Buoyancy (cheerfulness that bubbles to the surface;irrepressible liveliness and good spirit;the property of something weightless and insubstantial) Flamboyancy (richly and brilliantly colorful;elaborately or excessively ornamented)

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COMMENTS:

Eleveating the common cold to the royal pain it truly is! The grandiose elevated to the grandinose! - silveryaspen, 2009-01-02: 07:43:00

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Inphlegmatory

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: in flem a tor ee

Sentence: The Fire Marshall was certain to declare that the bedroom floor of Sal Iver's house was definitely an inphlegmatory risk. Sal had been sick with the flu for 2 days and had neither the skill nor the will to put all his used tissues in a receptacle. His bedroom was the site of much hankie pankie and the normally phlegmboyant Sal was reduced to that of a bronchialbuster who had not lasted long enough to win the big purse. The irony was that 2 days ago, he had planned to phone in sick to play hookey from work. He figured the word Gesundheit meant "serves you right". All this while his catarrh gently weeps...sniff, sniff!

Etymology: Inflammatory (characterized or caused by inflammation;unhealthy, detrimental to health) & Phlegm (Mucous,expectorated matter;saliva mixed with discharges from the respiratory passages)

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COMMENTS:

Ack !! I wanted to use "phlegm" for this one. Let's see... there are three more body fluids, right? I mean, phlegm, blood, something and something else... Gosh this is going to be difficult. - XMbIPb, 2010-05-19: 02:48:00

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Phlegmzard

kashman

Created by: kashman

Pronunciation: Flem-zard

Sentence: Fighting with cold left George so numb that he became indifferent to the phlegmzard created in the living room of his shared apartment; this apparent "coldness" resulted in exodus of his roomate to less hazardous environment.

Etymology: Phlegm (viscid mucus secreted while suffering from cold) + Hazard (source of danger).

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Nosemasses

Created by: silveryaspen

Pronunciation: nose - mass - es

Sentence: Praying my cold will soon go away, my used tissues I lay ... in nosemasses at the side of my bed.

Etymology: NOSE: protruding part the face through which humans breathe. During a cold/flu, noses excrete mucous profusely usually disposed of in tissues that rise in nose-like peaks. MASSES: mounds, heaps, religious services.

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COMMENTS:

you should probably say the nosary as well - Jabberwocky, 2008-03-10: 13:31:00

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Cleanix

Created by: Nuwanda

Pronunciation: Clee-nix

Sentence: Because she was usually fairly fastidious, Carla took measure of the cleanix surrounding her as a barometer of how sick she was. When she could no longer step off the couch without touching down on one of the slime nuggets, it was time to call the doctor.

Etymology: Kleenex, the popular tissue, altered to combine clean and nix, as in to put the kibosh on something.

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COMMENTS:

Nice etymology! - silveryaspen, 2009-01-07: 15:05:00

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Kleenexudate

libertybelle

Created by: libertybelle

Pronunciation: clean-ex-you-date

Sentence: Entombed in a layer of his own filthy Kleenexudate, Terry had to be under all that tissue paper and green snot somewhere. The question was who was brave enough to pick through to look for him?

Etymology: kleenex - tissue brand + exudate - fluid from body system, pus.

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COMMENTS:

They may need a terry-picker for that chore. - purpleartichokes, 2008-03-10: 18:26:00

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2008-03-10: 00:01:00
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-05-19: 00:01:00
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James