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'What are you doing in the fast lane?!!'

DEFINITION: n. A driver who ignores the rules of the road by driving very slowly (i.e. at the legal limit) in the fast lane. v. To strictly observe the "suggested" speed limits, even when using the fast lane.

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Verboticisms

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Slowffeur

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: slo fewer

Sentence: Archie drove his ancient Triumph convertible every day down the freeway to his appointments and errands. He was a slowffeur and believed his car lasted longer if he drove slower. Luckily he was very hard of hearing, so he missed all the honks he got from his fellow commuters in the fast lane. He believed that a safe speed was one that was exactly one half of the posted limit. He was finally pulled over one morning by the Highway Patrol. The officer naturally requested to see his license and insurance papers, to which Archie finally shouted: "Never needed either, since I never go over the limits. I don't need papers, I know how to drive!"

Etymology: Slow (not moving quickly; taking a comparatively long time) & Chauffeur (someone paid to drive a person in a car;to drive someone in a vehicle;a person who drives vehicles for a living)

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COMMENTS:

I think I rode in his taxi once. - Mustang, 2009-05-26: 06:42:00

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Slackfeetdriver

Created by: milorush

Pronunciation: n. slāk-fēt-drī'vər

Sentence: "Damn!" swore Dave, "I really need these slack-feet drivers to get the hell out of my way! Walgreen's is gonna run out of the half-off after-Easter candy!"

Etymology: slack + feet (sorta like 'limp-wristed' I guess) + [backseat] driver

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Slomomotorist

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: slōmōmōtərist

Sentence: It never fails, whenever Jim is in a hurry he falls in behind a slomomotorist. He should have known better this time. As he approached this virtual speed bump he saw all the classic signs, the over-sized sedan of dark bland color, the omnipresent turn signal, the silhouette of a fedora and white knuckles. The only thing that was more annoying was the guy in the next lane who felt it was his job to match the speed of the one in front of him effectively blocking him in.

Etymology: slow-motion (action appears slower than in real life) + motorist (the driver of an automobile)

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Meanderthal

Created by: Jamagra

Pronunciation: me/an'/der/thol

Sentence: "Hey, meanderthal!!! You're doing 55 miles per hour on the freaking freeway! Find the long pedal on the right and USE IT," Sam shouted at the elderly man in the Dodge Dart. "Meanderthalled again," grumbled Sam.

Etymology: meanderthal - meander (to wander aimlessly) + Neanderthal

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COMMENTS:

great word - Jabberwocky, 2008-04-07: 12:52:00

Excellent - OZZIEBOB, 2008-04-07: 20:33:00

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Trafficinterruptus

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: Traf - ik - in - tuh - RUHP - tuhs

Sentence: Irving once again found himself cursing the trafficinterruptus caused by two overly cautious drivers driving side by side taking up both lanes on the divided highway.

Etymology: Traffic and interruptus....latin for 'to interrupt'.

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COMMENTS:

Hehe! - purpleartichokes, 2008-04-07: 18:19:00

- arrrteest, 2008-04-07: 21:00:00

hmmm. My original comment was something like a chuckle and a wink, wink, nod, nod. I guess you can't put " - arrrteest, 2008-04-07: 21:02:00

lol, I'm using the comments here to learn about how and what not to put in comments here. Now, James, it dawns on my why you had to reformat my poem earlier. Ha! This makes me think of a definition for later... - arrrteest, 2008-04-07: 21:05:00

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Mamoover

Created by: abrakadeborah

Pronunciation: ma-moo-ver

Sentence: Molly had to mamoover very carefully in the heavy traffic near her farm.

Etymology: A play on the word maneuver

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Carstipate

Created by: OZZIEBOB

Pronunciation: kahr-stuh-PEYT

Sentence: Whilst driving Bob slow, dribble-to -rule approach left a long line of carstipated drivers behind him.

Etymology: Blend of CAR & CONSTIPATE: prevent passage through; impede; crowd together

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COMMENTS:

I can just hear a traffic reporter saying "The highway is carstipated" instead of "congested". Love it! - Jamagra, 2008-04-07: 14:05:00

hate those traffic fumes - Jabberwocky, 2008-04-07: 16:46:00

Love it! Yep, a great word to describe a traffic jam. - purpleartichokes, 2008-04-07: 18:10:00

It's a natural! - arrrteest, 2008-04-07: 20:58:00

Bob, it makes me think you fuel up with prune juice! Great word...very binding! - Nosila, 2008-04-08: 01:49:00

love it! - Softbagel14, 2008-04-08: 23:38:00

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Veltar

Created by: tyler775

Pronunciation: /fil * tar/

Sentence: This veltar drives twenty miles per hour when the speed limit for this lane is sixty!

Etymology: *vel from latin prefix speed *tard from latin suffix slow

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Cruisader

lplybon

Created by: lplybon

Pronunciation: "Kroo-SA-der"

Sentence: Although he adored her, Bart detested having to go grocery shopping with his Aunt Nelly. Aunt Nelly insisted on driving despite being blind in one eye and deaf in one ear. And she was such a cruisader! She consistently drove 10 miles under the speed limit, signaled in the parking lots, and stopped at all "stale green" (her phrase) lights.

Etymology: Combination of the words "cruise," "crusade," and "sadism"

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Egomotortist

Created by: verbherder

Pronunciation: ee-goh-moh-tawr-tist

Sentence: It was ten minutes to close at the only store in town when my baby's mama held up the last diaper in the house and announced that junior had suddenly developed an explosive case of diarrhea. I would have made it there and back with time to spare if not for an egomotortist in a Prius. When I returned without reinforcements, things went south down south. For the rest of the night I wished that junior could have spent just one minute in that guy's car.

Etymology: egotist + motorist + tortoise (in sound mostly)

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2008-04-07: 00:01:00
Today's definition was suggested by stache and Biscotti. Thank you stache and Biscotti. ~ James

arrrteest - 2008-04-07: 17:40:00
A friend of mine always said, "Beware of old men in hats driving Buicks." I remember driving up the NJ Turnpike at 75MPH and pushing 80 in the right lane and being flashed by motorists thinking I was going too slow!

purpleartichokes - 2008-04-07: 18:03:00
My dad always said "Beware of men smoking cigars and driving station wagons." Wouldn't ya know, my first close call was with one of them?

logarithm - 2008-11-27: 11:18:00
Hehehe...

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2009-05-26: 00:05:00
Today's definition was suggested by Biscotti. Thank you Biscotti. ~ James

PennonFurl - 2018-06-13: 19:02:00