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'What are you doing in the fast lane?!!'

DEFINITION: n. A driver who ignores the rules of the road by driving very slowly (i.e. at the legal limit) in the fast lane. v. To strictly observe the "suggested" speed limits, even when using the fast lane.

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Verboticisms

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Cruisader

lplybon

Created by: lplybon

Pronunciation: "Kroo-SA-der"

Sentence: Although he adored her, Bart detested having to go grocery shopping with his Aunt Nelly. Aunt Nelly insisted on driving despite being blind in one eye and deaf in one ear. And she was such a cruisader! She consistently drove 10 miles under the speed limit, signaled in the parking lots, and stopped at all "stale green" (her phrase) lights.

Etymology: Combination of the words "cruise," "crusade," and "sadism"

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Petroloiter

Created by: catgrin

Pronunciation: pe-tro-loi-ter

Sentence: People tend to petroloiter on Sundays. This causes weekend commuters no end of frustration!

Etymology: petrol + loiter

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Speedumbmeter

Created by: bookowl

Pronunciation: spee/dum/eater

Sentence: A speedumbmeter is too slow to drive.

Etymology: speedometer + dumb

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Flowpoke

mrskellyscl

Created by: mrskellyscl

Pronunciation: flow-poke

Sentence: The flowpoke ignored the stream of enraged drivers behind her and continued to chat with her passenger, driving for several miles in the passing lane with her turn signal blinking oblivious to the horns and salutes from her fellow drivers.

Etymology: Flow: continuity of movement as in a stream + poke: take more time than necessary; dawdle (wordplay on slowpoke)

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COMMENTS:

Would also apply to dimwitted cowboy. Excellent word! - Mustang, 2009-05-26: 06:43:00

Good word and all too many of them, on the road...love the ones who eat, talk on a cell and apply make-up simultaneously as well! - Nosila, 2009-05-26: 16:05:00

Great word.... - mweinmann, 2009-05-27: 09:47:00

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Lanedarme

Created by: stache

Pronunciation: lān därm'

Sentence: The left-lane bandits were more than Herb could take that day. He was trying to get to his daughter's recital, but they insisted on self-righteouslycreeping along at the posted limit in the far left lane. Then, to Herb's immense satisfaction, and for the first time in recorded history, the Highway Patrol came to the rescue, pulled the lanedarme over and wrote him a citation for obstructing traffic.

Etymology: lane + gendarme

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Slotorist

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: slōtərist

Sentence: Wouldn’t you know it, the one morning that Jim was running late he gets behind an ancient slotorist. Why this lady is out this early driving her automosnail, nobody knows but it is clear that she is exceeding the impede limit.

Etymology: slow (not quick or fast) + motorist (the driver of an automobile)

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Slackfeetdriver

Created by: milorush

Pronunciation: n. slāk-fēt-drī'vər

Sentence: "Damn!" swore Dave, "I really need these slack-feet drivers to get the hell out of my way! Walgreen's is gonna run out of the half-off after-Easter candy!"

Etymology: slack + feet (sorta like 'limp-wristed' I guess) + [backseat] driver

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Carstipate

Created by: OZZIEBOB

Pronunciation: kahr-stuh-PEYT

Sentence: Whilst driving Bob slow, dribble-to -rule approach left a long line of carstipated drivers behind him.

Etymology: Blend of CAR & CONSTIPATE: prevent passage through; impede; crowd together

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COMMENTS:

I can just hear a traffic reporter saying "The highway is carstipated" instead of "congested". Love it! - Jamagra, 2008-04-07: 14:05:00

hate those traffic fumes - Jabberwocky, 2008-04-07: 16:46:00

Love it! Yep, a great word to describe a traffic jam. - purpleartichokes, 2008-04-07: 18:10:00

It's a natural! - arrrteest, 2008-04-07: 20:58:00

Bob, it makes me think you fuel up with prune juice! Great word...very binding! - Nosila, 2008-04-08: 01:49:00

love it! - Softbagel14, 2008-04-08: 23:38:00

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Slowffeur

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: slo fewer

Sentence: Archie drove his ancient Triumph convertible every day down the freeway to his appointments and errands. He was a slowffeur and believed his car lasted longer if he drove slower. Luckily he was very hard of hearing, so he missed all the honks he got from his fellow commuters in the fast lane. He believed that a safe speed was one that was exactly one half of the posted limit. He was finally pulled over one morning by the Highway Patrol. The officer naturally requested to see his license and insurance papers, to which Archie finally shouted: "Never needed either, since I never go over the limits. I don't need papers, I know how to drive!"

Etymology: Slow (not moving quickly; taking a comparatively long time) & Chauffeur (someone paid to drive a person in a car;to drive someone in a vehicle;a person who drives vehicles for a living)

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COMMENTS:

I think I rode in his taxi once. - Mustang, 2009-05-26: 06:42:00

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Freewaste

Created by: queenjane75

Pronunciation: free-waste

Sentence: It was only a fraction of a moment Shawn had spent attempting to read the grocery list his girlfriend had sent by text message. Shawn had become the latest multitaskhole killed by a freewaster slacking in the fast lane.

Etymology: freeway+waste (as in waste one's time)

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2008-04-07: 00:01:00
Today's definition was suggested by stache and Biscotti. Thank you stache and Biscotti. ~ James

arrrteest - 2008-04-07: 17:40:00
A friend of mine always said, "Beware of old men in hats driving Buicks." I remember driving up the NJ Turnpike at 75MPH and pushing 80 in the right lane and being flashed by motorists thinking I was going too slow!

purpleartichokes - 2008-04-07: 18:03:00
My dad always said "Beware of men smoking cigars and driving station wagons." Wouldn't ya know, my first close call was with one of them?

logarithm - 2008-11-27: 11:18:00
Hehehe...

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2009-05-26: 00:05:00
Today's definition was suggested by Biscotti. Thank you Biscotti. ~ James

PennonFurl - 2018-06-13: 19:02:00