Vote for the best verboticism.
DEFINITION: v. To remain calm, steadfast and ploddingly systematic in the midst of a huge freaking disaster. n. A person who systematizes everything from their morning routines to personal relationships.
Verboticisms
Click on each verboticism to read the sentences created by the Verbotomy writers, and to see your voting options...
You have two votes. Click on the words to read the details, then vote your favorite.
Panicstilled
Created by: Maureen
Pronunciation: pan-ic-stil-d
Sentence: "Darling come home quickly, the tree has fallen across the house, all the windows are broken and the dog is dead." Mark, ever the panicstiller, said "Don't worry sweeheart I'll pick up a spade on the way home so we can bury poor Charlie."
Etymology: Panic - a state of terror and Still - calm, tranquil.
Chaotizen
Created by: brucee10
Pronunciation: Kay - ah - Ti - zen
Sentence: His chaotizen attitude was infuriating. How he could read a book during an multi-server crash, I'll never know.
Etymology: Chaotic + zen or chaos+ citizen(someone who lives in constant chaos and is not alarmed by it)
Staotic
Created by: ekath
Pronunciation: stay-ot-tick
Sentence: Todd is so staotic that he didn't even cry out when the acid splashed in his face... he just calmly went over and pulled the safety shower. When it fire-hosed him into the ground, he shakily stood up and asked to go to the nurse's office. Carol should have been more like Todd.
Etymology: from stable + chaotic
Crisystematic
Created by: libertybelle
Pronunciation: cry-sis-tim-at-tick
Sentence: Being a trauma physician with OCD, Dr. Bank was very crisystematic; he would literally pull a flow chart out of his lab coat for each and every code blue that he worked on. You would think after 20 years of practice he would rely on his memory for some of it. True Story!!
Etymology: crisis + systematic
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COMMENTS:
Also - this illustration made me lol this morning! - libertybelle, 2011-04-15: 07:34:00
good one! - Nosila, 2011-04-15: 11:30:00
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Syssedate
Created by: Rhyme79
Pronunciation: siss-seh-date
Sentence: "Queenie is so sysedate despite the madness in this office. I don't know how she does it!"
Etymology: Amalgamation of the words 'system' and 'sedate'.
Calmandant
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: colm man dant
Sentence: His real name was Edward Edwards, but we called him Steady Eddie. His middle name was Danger, you just knew it. He was the Safety Officer at work. You know, the guy they have to have on staff by law, who has weekly boring meetings, who arranges first-aid classes ad nauseum, who sends out zillions of safety tips and preventative brochures. You know, the guy who loves to organize fire drills, creates emergency preparedness policies, who lives for Fire Prevention Week or news of the Pandemic,who arranges yearly flu shots, who handles bomb scares, suicide preventions, does random drug testing and tries to beat his last timed evacuation record. He can't wait to have to call the CDC in Atlanta, the FAA, ER, SWAT,Interpol, WCB,EPA, FireRescue, Coast Guard, National Guard and any other agencies on his speed-dial. He lives to test our flashlight batteries, extinguishers, carbon monoxide detectors and the oxygen masks that he has installed over our desks, like the airlines. Don't get me wrong, we need guys like Steady Eddie, but did he have to enjoy a career based on potential tragedy so much? Although excited by the prospect of a looming calamity, he always remained cool, calm and efficient. Steady Eddie was the Master of Disaster; he was the AntiCrisis; the Apocalypse Mao; The Tragically Equipped; Genghis Yes-You-Can; Attila The Nine-One-One; Napoleon Bones-a-part; The Wizard of Gauze...Yes, he was our own Calmandant. They said he even stayed calm when the aliens abducted him one morning and took him with them to probe at will, never to get to wear his reflective safety vest and clipboard again. There's just no known drill to prevent that kind of incident!
Etymology: calm (steadiness of mind under stress;marked by freedom from agitation or excitement) & commandant (someone in an official position of authority who can command or control others)
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COMMENTS:
"Apocalypse Mao" was just too funny! Excellent. - Tigger, 2008-07-10: 02:03:00
CALMANDANT is cool- Steady Eddy is just the kind of take-charge guy we need ......not - metrohumanx, 2008-07-10: 07:50:00
very apt - Jabberwocky, 2008-07-10: 09:37:00
Steady Eddie is indeed needed in these types of situations, - at least, he'd keep everyone laughing. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-07-11: 18:23:00
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Catastaunch
Created by: ErWenn
Pronunciation: /kəˈtæˌstɔːntʃ/
Sentence: When calamity strikes, it's often surprising to see who steps up to catastaunch the flow of disaster; it's not always whom you expect.
Etymology: from catastrophe + staunch (meaning both "steadfast" and "to stop the flow of")
Femalusional
Created by: metrohumanx
Pronunciation: FEE-MUH-LOOSH-UH-NULL
Sentence: Ever since his apartment fire, James had become unsufferably FEEMALUSIONAL. He traveled with a fire extinguisher, kept a stock of bottled water in the attic, had a medical kit the size of a fooslocker, a portable degenerator and a satellite phone with GPS...yet his pandering scoutmaster attitude and hopelessly optimistic pseudocheerfulness in the face of impending disaster forced his peers to reject him like a transplanted baboon heart.
Etymology: FEMA:Federal Emergency Management Agency + DELUSIONAL:A false belief that is resistant to confrontation with actual facts.
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COMMENTS:
It can't happen here. - metrohumanx, 2008-07-10: 07:47:00
super important to read the etymology on this one metro but great blend - Jabberwocky, 2008-07-10: 09:32:00
Hey, crew ! Check this site out:
http://www.blackstump.com.au/ - metrohumanx, 2008-07-10: 09:36:00
Good one, metrohumanx...a woman doing what James did would be a Fema Fatale, n'est-ce pas? - Nosila, 2008-07-10: 23:13:00
love your etymology. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-07-11: 18:16:00
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Bluesbrothercool
Created by: jedijawa
Pronunciation: bloose-broth-her-cool
Sentence: Jack had a bluesbrothercool in how he dealt with things because even the greatest chaos didn't phase him.
Etymology: In the movie "The Blues Brothers" Jake and Elwood Blues were shot at, chased, blown up, threatened, and various other things while remaining calm and unflapable. They were the essence of bluesbrothercool.
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COMMENTS:
I always just thought they were stoned - brucee10, 2007-05-10: 12:15:00
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Catatoniclysmic
Created by: airlie
Pronunciation: KAT-a-ton-uh-KLIZ-mic
Sentence: Gazing upon Geraldine's panicked visage, Irving remained catatoniclysmic. He knew what to do. This was no crisis, this was merely one of those moments that make life worth smiling about. "AAAAHGGGH!" screeched Geraldine. "My hair! Don't let them see me like this!" She gripped his shirt, knuckles white, fabric strained to button-popping point. Irving blinked slowly, and a beatific smile spread across his face. "Don't panic, honey." He soothed. "I'm the sysadmin! I'll 403 everyone." Geraldine breathed a sigh of relief... and her relief lasted for a millesecond until she caught sight of her fire-engine red and day-old-bruise purple coiffe in the mirror. She fled to the bathroom in hysterics. Irving blinked slowly.
Etymology: CATACLYSM: any violent upheaval, esp. one of a social or political nature + CATATONIC, adjectival form of CATATONIA: a syndrome seen most frequently in schizophrenia, characterized by muscular rigidity and mental stupor, sometimes alternating with great excitement and confusion
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COMMENTS:
CATATONICLYSMIC is hilarious! Great word, Airlie... - metrohumanx, 2008-07-10: 08:02:00
terrific word - Jabberwocky, 2008-07-10: 09:29:00
Very gloomly; very great word. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-07-11: 18:11:00
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Comments:
Today's definition was inspired by Cory Doctorow's short story "When Sysadmins Ruled the Earth" which is published in Overclocked, and was suggested by autophile. Thank you Cory and autophile! ~ James
I'm still grinning at this one. Well done!
Today's definition was suggested by doctorow. Thank you doctorow. ~ James